Monday, July 7, 2008

Dreams. Night and day.
So, I had a dream last night about James. (College James, not OB James, lol). It was September and we started talking again - he caught me off-guard, even though I had been intending not to talk to him (like, real convo, not just "hey") anymore.

And then we started being silly; he put me on his shoulders and flipped me and did all these acrobatic things.

And then I remembered that he's immature and selfish, and I woke up. XD

Apparently, according to the dream dictionary I used, dreaming of acrobatics means that I'm "thinking of a way to move around major obstacles put in [my] way. Confused and crushed by competing forces, you will find difficulties achieving your goals."

Oh GREAT. -_-; If this was in reference to James, I'm screwed. If this was in reference to the automail that needs to be made, I'm still screwed and thank you for stating the obvious, dream. X_x;;;


On to the daydreaming...

I let him go. I really, REALLY did. I swear. I even put it in a PostSecret book, that's how much I let him go.

But every time I drive past the turn you would take to go to his house, which is every day, mon-thurs, two ways (I go straight to go to work), I think about him in passing, and I hope that I'll run into him this summer and get to talk to him. Just for five minutes, you know. And charm him in those five minutes. And sometimes, if I'm at the light long enough, I'll go into older day dreams.

And I'm just starting to get depressed by thinking about it all. =( I wish I wasn't reminded of him this way.

I almost put this as my facebook status but didn't: "Roxie thinks about you every time she passes the direction of your house."

It's just, "Roxie is thinking something secret. :X"

And I wish he could know what that secret was.

Wish wish wish, that's all this is. Wishful thinking. Heart breaking. Twice a day. Over and over again.