Sunday, March 28, 2004

Marilyn Manson-The Fight Song

Nothing suffocates you more than the passing of everyday human events
And isolation is the oxygen mask you're making children breathe into to survive

But I'm not a slave
To a God
That doesn't exist

But I'm not a slave
To a world
That doesn't give a shit

And when we were good
You'd just close your eyes
So when we are bad
We'll scar your minds

Fight
Fight
Fight
Fight
Fight
Fight
Fight
Fight

You'll never grow up to be a big rock star
Celebrated victim of your fame
They'll just cut our wrists like cheap coupons and say that death was on sale today

And when we were good
You'd just close your eyes
So when we are bad
We'll scar your minds

But I'm not a slave
To a God
That doesn't exist

But I'm not a slave
To a world
That doesn't give a shit

The death of one is a tragedy
The death of one is a tragedy
The death of one is a tragedy
The death of a million is just a statistic

But I'm not a slave
To a God
That doesn't exist

But I'm not a slave
To a world
That doesn't give a shit

But I'm not a slave
To a God
That doesn't exist

But I'm not a slave
To a world
That doesn't give a shit

Fight
Fight
Fight
Fight
Fight
Fight
Fight
Fight
Comments (0) | Permalink

A Report That Translated Right

It is done with practiced bravado each and every day. These beings, calling themselves human beings, homo saipiens, awaken from their spring-bore things called beds.

Some are awoken to the sound of an alarm clock: a device which emanates an intermittent whine of mechanical beeps and bops. Others awaken at their own accord: they simply open their eyes and know, somehow, that it is time to get up, time to go out about their ways.

These human beings come in various appearances; but each and every one is either of a certain gender, a sex. These beings have two sexes: a female and a male. The male is the predominant figure in their hiearchy. He is stronger than the woman and fends for the woman and offspring. His reproductive organ is located in the lower half of his body, in the center. It is an extending device which, when sexually aroused by a fellow female, is engorged with blood and augements in size.

The woman of the human beings, on the other hand, has more body fat content. She has wide hips, adapted to suit child bearing and birth. She is physically weak. Women in these beings' social hiearchy often have long hair, while the man has short hair. Woman are often lodged as the child carer, while the man is the one who works. It appears that this status quo is slowly being phased out in these beings' social hierachy at this time. Eventually the women will work as much as the men.

The woman have large milk-producing breasts, two on the upper part of the torso. As with the man, on the lower half of her body, in the center, she has a sexual organ. This sexual organ is used in conjunction with the man's. Therefore, the woman has a suited hole where the man inserts his organ. This is how these beings reproduce; how they engange in reproduction.

But that is not the pertinent purpose of this report.

So here we are, the humans awakening each morning in their practiced proclivities. Each in different sizes. Shapes. Genders.

They all awaken when they have so set it. Once awakened, some of the beings will stretch their arms and flail them about the air. Others do not.

There is a meal called "breakfast" in the human nomenclature. This meal is the first of three they may have in a day, and usually consists of wheat grains and nourishing milk. At other times they will obtain eggs, and crack these open, heating them and then eating. Other things eaten and drank for this meal include: orange juice, a type of a juice obtained from a naturally growing plant on their planet Earth; bacon, a meat which is made from a naturally occuring animal called a pig, or swine; hashbrowns, also a food item obtained from a naturally occuring plant; pancakes, which are flat, round edibles consisting of a batter made of flour and other ingredients; ham, a meat which is also obtained from the naturally occuring pig.

Some homo saipiens eat this meal. Others do not. Others do it as they feel like doing it.

Some human beings also bathe when they first awaken. They have specially made rooms called bathrooms where they bathe. These rooms are also used to expose of sold and aqueous wastes by way of defecation or urination.

There are two types of bathing: there is showering and baths. Baths involve filling a large "tub," or large, empty container, with water. The water is often hot water. Then the human being sits, naked, in the bathtub and bathes. They use "shampoo"--vitamin-rich forumlas specially produced for hair--to clean their hair which grows on their skulls. They use "soap"--bacteria-killing bars, fragmented with nice-smelling scent--to clean their bodies and clean away bacterium.

The other form of bathing--showering-- involves a "shower head"--a device that sprinkles out drops of water in even waves--which then hits the human being's body enough to keep it perpetually inebriated and wet. Then the human being uses their shampoo or soap.

Once showered, eaten, the human being will dress themselves in fabric-oriented garments called "clothes." Clothes come in al shapes and sizes, and looks and colors. Some are small and tight and baring, showcasing the humans' bodies. Others are more conservative and cover all of their body except for their face and head. Some are black, some or green, some are orange, teal, lavender, crimson, navu blue, dark blue, yellow. Some are short, long, little, big, medium, tiny.

Once dressed the human being either goes to work or school, depending upon their age. The children to teenagers of human beings go to school. The age is around from the age of one to the age of ninteen or twenty. And even after twenty years of education the human being often goes to college, where they may stay for two years until getting a degree, or doctorate, or whatever else authentication of their abilities to work. This higher form of education by College costs the individual money and time. This is unlike the lower, inferior forms of education, which are paid for by the government's alloting.

In the human beings' hiearchy, each being is to sustain itself. In their hiearchy there is currency, and this currency can only be learned through working. This currency has everything on it. The currency is needed to live. The human beings put a price on living through a need to work, to show worth, and sustain the hierarchy. Working by way of labor, by way of mental principles, put to work what suits the best. The human being works whatever job they are meanable enough to work.

Those of the homo saipiens who do not get a college education, or even worse, drop out of the inferiorer forms of education, end up with the worst jobs. They aquire the jobs that no human being wants to work whole lives. These jobs include working at food service, working as a cashier at the varying amounts of market places--called "stores"--where a human being may purchase munitions. Supplies.

The higher level jobs mostly lie in professional work. With the advent of automation by way of machines in the human beings' world, there is less need for the mechanically inclined jobs. Now there is a surging need for the professional jobs, the jobs needing much experience and knowledge.

Work consists of the human being doing a wide array of tasks. There is being a cashier and giving out the currency. There is teaching at the educational facilities. There is commandeering the flying machines called planes. There is the taxi service industry--which is an industry that transports humans for a fare. There is the bus industry--another transportation device given for a fare. There is a great many of varying fields. Too much to put into this one report.

Most human beings seem to enjoy their work. But not all of the time. At times the human being gets tired of working and wishes to just live and not have to work. But it is an institutionalized practice in this social hiearchy that work is what gets one places.

This is different than our own ideals by a longshot. We do not seem so much like these beings.

Once the human being is done working, they will come home. There is a thing called "marriage"--a joint living arrangment between a male and a female--which is boistered and promoted throughout, and which many human beings follow. The human beings believe in a thing called "love"--they believe in emotions, and how these emotions can make their lives seem worthwhile and whole. They believe that through these joint "loving" they can coalesce and become one and make something far greater than just one another. Again, this is different to our own ways. It may seem odd, but this is how the human beings do things.

After doing what they will after working--perhaps they will watch TV--a viewing device which showcases educational, entertaining, as well as useless information--perhaps they will have sex with their partners. Perhaps the will do anything, whatever it is that makes them feel more whole for working their whole lives.

Then they go to sleep. The average human being sleeps around seven to ten hours a night.

In the observation of these creatures, I find they are quite techonologically, idealogically, physically, and mentally incompotent. I find they are ignorant creatures that do not understand their standing and how to run their race.

I estimate that it will be billions of years before they achieve anything beyond what they have. For they are too set in their ways and too wasting in what they do with their short-lived lives. The average human only lives around seventy years, but with the advent of their medicine, they may live longer; this is far shorter than our lifespan.

These beings waste most of their lives learning and growing, only to see a rapid downturn in their older years, when they grow aged and frail. It is only then when they are wise that they realize how useless all they did is.

They are foolish beings who live a futile existence. It is only with struggle and more acceptance that they will achieve anything higher than what they have.
Comments (1) | Permalink

I Guess It Makes Sense Now.

So now I see.

---

madsatirist (2:01:24 AM): :-D
madsatirist (2:01:24 AM): ::Evil grin::
madsatirist (2:01:24 AM): Isn't it fun?
machineofbones (2:01:39 AM): Not really. It's more like a waste of time lol.
madsatirist (2:01:45 AM): You'll like my reply.
madsatirist (2:01:50 AM): It's the best one of them yet.
madsatirist (2:01:58 AM): hahaha
madsatirist (2:02:09 AM): You'll like it. Trust me.
madsatirist (2:02:20 AM): Quick thought before I go sleepy,
machineofbones (2:02:25 AM): Mm?
madsatirist (2:02:43 AM): very few realize that there are two ways of getting a desired reaction.
madsatirist (2:03:21 AM): One is to be so crass to them so much that they transform,
madsatirist (2:03:30 AM): and the other is being polite so they transform.
madsatirist (2:03:38 AM): Just thought you'd like to know.
madsatirist (2:03:55 AM): :-)
machineofbones (2:03:59 AM): All right.
machineofbones (2:04:02 AM): Go to sleep.
madsatirist (2:04:07 AM): You've taken an important step.
machineofbones (2:04:22 AM): You're just testing me I see.
madsatirist (2:04:27 AM): I'm very pleased.
madsatirist (2:04:44 AM): Was there ever any doubt in your mind?
machineofbones (2:04:52 AM): Doubt as to what?
madsatirist (2:04:56 AM): Every thing I say has a purpose to it.
madsatirist (2:05:32 AM): A doubt as to my intent.
machineofbones (2:06:11 AM): Honestly, all I knew was that you were replying in My O for whatever reason, and I was just responding in my dignified way.
machineofbones (2:06:42 AM): I could tell with the post about my dad that you were acting a bit.
madsatirist (2:06:51 AM): So then there was no honest first step there?
madsatirist (2:07:02 AM): You said those things to merely stop the conversation?
machineofbones (2:07:18 AM): Yes.
madsatirist (2:07:24 AM): I knew he was your stepfather a long time ago.
madsatirist (2:07:36 AM): You had made mention of it a few months back.
machineofbones (2:07:42 AM): Yes.
madsatirist (2:08:07 AM): So then you did not mean what you said?
machineofbones (2:08:18 AM): Did not mean what I said when?
machineofbones (2:08:22 AM): What I just replied with>
machineofbones (2:08:28 AM): I meant it and I didn't at the same time.
madsatirist (2:08:32 AM): Careful here.
madsatirist (2:09:31 AM): One thing about writing, you must mean what you write all the time, entirely.
madsatirist (2:09:34 AM): There must be total purpose and honest purpose to what you write.
madsatirist (2:09:39 AM): No question in motivation.
machineofbones (2:09:42 AM): That's what you think.
madsatirist (2:09:45 AM): No ambiguity.
machineofbones (2:09:47 AM): And you can thinkt hat.
machineofbones (2:09:49 AM): *that
madsatirist (2:10:06 AM): The only ambiguity allowed is intended ambiguity of subject.
machineofbones (2:10:17 AM): That is what you think.
machineofbones (2:10:19 AM): You can think that.
madsatirist (2:10:20 AM): But in this case,
madsatirist (2:10:34 AM): the subject matter does not allow ambiguity.
madsatirist (2:10:44 AM): So you're only halfway there to the first step.
madsatirist (2:10:55 AM): But keep developing it.
machineofbones (2:11:07 AM): I honestly have no idea what the hell you're talking about. All I know is that writing is more to me than just communication.
madsatirist (2:11:25 AM): You've come a long way since I started talking with you.
madsatirist (2:11:54 AM): So you should be proud of what you've accomplished on the path.
machineofbones (2:12:02 AM): Thanks, I guess.
machineofbones (2:12:09 AM): I do what I can.
madsatirist (2:12:10 AM): Ah, but writing is about more than just communication.
machineofbones (2:12:18 AM): That is what I said.
madsatirist (2:12:18 AM): But it also has to make sense.
madsatirist (2:12:35 AM): There's a distinction between communicating an idea and the reader being able to make sense of it.
machineofbones (2:12:39 AM): Well, sometimes the only sense you can make isn't sense.
madsatirist (2:12:57 AM): That sentence you had written was not communication at all.
madsatirist (2:13:13 AM): That's a misconception.
machineofbones (2:13:18 AM): What sentence?
madsatirist (2:13:32 AM): It's called fallacy of expressive form.
madsatirist (2:13:39 AM): And it's frowned upon.
machineofbones (2:14:00 AM): I don't care what other people think. I simply write. You hate it or you love it. It's your choice.
madsatirist (2:14:13 AM): "The crash turns to the cold boy; the boy is the sky and is nothing as no one."
madsatirist (2:14:21 AM): That.
madsatirist (2:14:32 AM): It's simply a jumble of words, which is not what the teacher asked for.
madsatirist (2:14:40 AM): Correction, what the teacher required.
machineofbones (2:14:47 AM): You are taking this way out of context. But anyway.
madsatirist (2:15:05 AM): Out of context?
machineofbones (2:15:06 AM): I respect my teachers and they respect me.
madsatirist (2:15:15 AM): Nah.
machineofbones (2:15:34 AM): You can't even say that. You do not know me, Alex.
madsatirist (2:15:40 AM): We can go into the post, if you like.
madsatirist (2:15:59 AM): Mitch, I used to be just like you.
madsatirist (2:16:08 AM): I know exactly where you're coming from concerning writing.
machineofbones (2:16:09 AM): I know.
madsatirist (2:16:27 AM): I've said the exact same things in my Junior year.
madsatirist (2:19:07 AM): Junior year of high school.
madsatirist (2:19:07 AM): When I had entire projects rejected, I blamed the teachers.
madsatirist (2:19:07 AM): But it wasn't their fault at all.
madsatirist (2:19:07 AM): I ignored what the assignment was.
madsatirist (2:19:08 AM): The teachers are there to instruct you.
madsatirist (2:19:08 AM): To help you.
madsatirist (2:19:08 AM): They're not the enemy.
madsatirist (2:19:08 AM): They're not some prison guard.
madsatirist (2:19:08 AM): And I'm not angry at you or anything, either.
madsatirist (2:19:08 AM): I know what you're going through.
madsatirist (2:19:08 AM): And I'm here to help.
madsatirist (2:19:14 AM): And I've got to get to bed.
madsatirist (2:19:24 AM): Sleep well, Mitch.
machineofbones (2:19:29 AM): *nod*
madsatirist (2:19:29 AM): You're feeling better already, I'm sure of it.
madsatirist (2:19:36 AM): And not from what I've said, either.
madsatirist (2:19:56 AM): That comment reply was your first step.
madsatirist (2:20:06 AM): Seriously, remember how you were not even a year ago?
machineofbones (2:20:22 AM): If you could've caught me at a different time, I would've said something differently probably.
machineofbones (2:20:56 AM): I wasn't in a good mood when I saw the comment, but I believe in dignity, and I wanted to be kind even if I didn't feel it.
madsatirist (2:21:25 AM): And that is demonstrating maturity that you had never demonstrated before.
machineofbones (2:21:39 AM): I've always had it.
machineofbones (2:21:46 AM): You see, this is just the internet.
machineofbones (2:21:58 AM): I use it as a place to get my bad feelings out.
machineofbones (2:22:07 AM): That is mostly what my posts in the past have been to you.
machineofbones (2:22:08 AM): I suppose.
madsatirist (2:22:18 AM): You haven't always had it, though.
madsatirist (2:22:28 AM): I'm not trying to insult you, either.
machineofbones (2:22:32 AM): Yes I have. I have always been polite. At least in person.
madsatirist (2:22:41 AM): If you always had it, then you would have never exploded anywhere.
machineofbones (2:22:48 AM): This is the internet.
machineofbones (2:22:52 AM): This is different in aspects.
madsatirist (2:23:29 AM): There's a definite difference in what happened now and what happened last year.
madsatirist (2:23:45 AM): Think about what you just said.
madsatirist (2:23:53 AM): You've always been polite in person.
madsatirist (2:24:05 AM): Why is that do you think?
machineofbones (2:24:21 AM): When I just meet someone. Maybe I'm walking outside, and someone says hi.
machineofbones (2:24:25 AM): I'll respond back with hi.
machineofbones (2:24:28 AM): Someone says thank you to me.
machineofbones (2:24:32 AM): I say you're welcome back.
machineofbones (2:24:35 AM): Someone drops something.
machineofbones (2:24:37 AM): I pick it up.
machineofbones (2:24:44 AM): They say thank you to me.
machineofbones (2:24:47 AM): I say you're welcome back.
madsatirist (2:24:57 AM): You've been suppressing a lot.
madsatirist (2:25:00 AM): Bottling it up, as it were, and letting it out online.
madsatirist (2:25:02 AM): Now, only recently when you just released that anxiety in real life, did you feel more secure.
machineofbones (2:25:26 AM): Yes, that's probably true.
madsatirist (2:25:29 AM): That's not being polite. That's just subscribing to societal conventions.
madsatirist (2:25:54 AM): That's one of the pitfalls of society.
machineofbones (2:26:03 AM): Well then, is being polite subscribing to societal conventions? If not, then what is "being polite"?
madsatirist (2:26:08 AM): There are expectations that we are subconsciously driven to follow.
madsatirist (2:26:32 AM): "Being polite" is being able to express a feeling to someone in a reasonable manner.
madsatirist (2:26:39 AM): In real life, too.
madsatirist (2:26:49 AM): We must make that specification.
madsatirist (2:27:07 AM): I have a feeling that you never really told someone how you were feeling in real life.
machineofbones (2:27:23 AM): It's called intution.
madsatirist (2:27:31 AM): Call it what you will.
madsatirist (2:27:49 AM): But never being able to tell them hurt you inside, didn't it?
machineofbones (2:28:06 AM): I don't know.
madsatirist (2:28:13 AM): The recent update about the communication and your teacher is an example that it did hurt you inside.
madsatirist (2:28:22 AM): I can feel the conflict in you.
madsatirist (2:28:33 AM): You wanted to scream at the teacher, didn't you?
machineofbones (2:28:37 AM): No.
machineofbones (2:28:39 AM): I didn't.
madsatirist (2:28:47 AM): No?
machineofbones (2:28:49 AM): No.
madsatirist (2:28:58 AM): You didn't want to tell them precisely what you were feeling?
machineofbones (2:29:07 AM): No, I guess not.
madsatirist (2:29:09 AM): The rage that was building inside you?
machineofbones (2:29:13 AM): I know that I did not want to scream
machineofbones (2:29:15 AM): There was no rage.
machineofbones (2:29:31 AM): There was just that little thought and that was all.
madsatirist (2:29:33 AM): There must have been something dark in there.
machineofbones (2:29:42 AM): And then I said she was right, language is for communication, but it's more to me than that.
machineofbones (2:29:46 AM): That's about it.
madsatirist (2:30:01 AM): But why didn't you explain?
madsatirist (2:30:10 AM): Why not discuss this with her at the front of the room?
machineofbones (2:30:11 AM): Why explain it? It didn't matter.
madsatirist (2:30:28 AM): If you feel so stongly about it.
madsatirist (2:30:39 AM): It did matter, though.
madsatirist (2:30:50 AM): It mattered enough for you to explode online.
machineofbones (2:30:54 AM): No.
machineofbones (2:30:57 AM): I was just passionate then.
machineofbones (2:31:02 AM): I'm not passionate 24/7.
madsatirist (2:31:12 AM): I'm not saying 24/7.
madsatirist (2:31:29 AM): It's still going to bother you, though, isn't it?
machineofbones (2:31:35 AM): That I didn't say anything?
madsatirist (2:31:37 AM): When it happens again.
machineofbones (2:31:38 AM): It doesn't bother me. no.
madsatirist (2:31:59 AM): No, when it happens again. When you're criticized.
madsatirist (2:32:03 AM): When you're told that you're wrong.
machineofbones (2:32:10 AM): It doesn't bother me.
madsatirist (2:32:23 AM): Oh?
madsatirist (2:32:28 AM): Are you sure?
machineofbones (2:32:35 AM): At least with how I feel now.
madsatirist (2:32:47 AM): Next time in class, when the Literature instructor decimates whatever you have to say,
madsatirist (2:32:59 AM): that's not going to bother you at all?
machineofbones (2:33:12 AM): It wasn't a literature instructor. It was my Latin teacher heh.
madsatirist (2:33:31 AM): Minor technicality.
machineofbones (2:33:45 AM): She didn't decimate what I had to say, really.
madsatirist (2:33:55 AM): You were forced to cave.
machineofbones (2:33:58 AM): I still had what I said. But I said it to myself.
madsatirist (2:34:06 AM): You had no defense that you felt confident in.
machineofbones (2:34:34 AM): No, I just didn't really care. I only cared about what I believed in. If the teacher wanted to believe what language is for herself, let her.
machineofbones (2:34:37 AM): Doesn't hurt me.
machineofbones (2:34:41 AM): I'm passive. I don't care.
madsatirist (2:34:59 AM): That's not entirely accurate.
madsatirist (2:35:04 AM): You do care.
madsatirist (2:35:14 AM): There's a part of you, deep down in there, that does care.
machineofbones (2:35:48 AM): Well, I care about what I believe in obviously. I listen to what she has to say, but I don't really care, because it's not what I believe about language.
madsatirist (2:35:57 AM): If you didn't care at all,
madsatirist (2:35:57 AM): then you would never feel inclined to talk about anything, anywhere.
madsatirist (2:36:25 AM): But what if what you believe is false?
machineofbones (2:36:35 AM): I don't believe in right and wrong.
machineofbones (2:36:45 AM): I believe that by someone's eyes what they think is right could be right.
machineofbones (2:36:59 AM): And what someone else looks at might be wrong to them but right to that person.
machineofbones (2:37:07 AM): I don't mean in extreme cases.
machineofbones (2:37:10 AM): Killing is wrong, of course.
machineofbones (2:37:20 AM): At least in this society.
madsatirist (2:37:24 AM): But what is extreme?
madsatirist (2:37:35 AM): Where does extreme begin?
machineofbones (2:37:49 AM): I don't really know, exactly.
machineofbones (2:37:53 AM): Where do you think it begins?
madsatirist (2:38:03 AM): Precisely.
machineofbones (2:38:21 AM): Everything could be right if there wasn't something telling you to believe this or that.
machineofbones (2:38:37 AM): If you were shaped by nothing but yourself, say, you'd think what you believed was right.
madsatirist (2:38:49 AM): It begins when a human being loses their shred of decency. Where they become a monster.
machineofbones (2:39:02 AM): Perhaps there's these tribe of people. . .they rape other women. They think what they do is right. And so they do it.
machineofbones (2:39:05 AM): Etc.
madsatirist (2:39:11 AM): And you refuse to let yourself be shaped by anything other than yourself.
madsatirist (2:39:28 AM): You treat the outside world like it's out to get you.
machineofbones (2:39:38 AM): That's true, yeah.
madsatirist (2:39:38 AM): Like it's out to destroy you.
madsatirist (2:39:54 AM): And what has The Terminator Trilogy taught us?
machineofbones (2:40:01 AM): Fatre.
machineofbones (2:40:02 AM): *Fate
madsatirist (2:40:06 AM): We can't fight Fate.
madsatirist (2:40:17 AM): We must adapt with it.
madsatirist (2:40:33 AM): We must learn how to utilize it to our advantage, to not treat it like Death.
machineofbones (2:40:33 AM): I will adapt. I'm just not ready yet, completely.
madsatirist (2:41:00 AM): The years are quickly passing, Mitch.
machineofbones (2:41:11 AM): Yeah, I know.
madsatirist (2:41:13 AM): You've got to complete the process before you graduate.
madsatirist (2:41:15 AM): I sound like Yoda.
madsatirist (2:41:26 AM): Well, Yoda was one of the best characters in Star Wars.
machineofbones (2:41:27 AM): I already know this though.
machineofbones (2:41:47 AM): It's either fall behind or rise above it.
madsatirist (2:42:01 AM): It's neither of those, though.
madsatirist (2:42:14 AM): Don't rise above it but don't fail.
machineofbones (2:42:21 AM): Yeah.
machineofbones (2:42:23 AM): Adapt.
madsatirist (2:42:25 AM): Work past it.
madsatirist (2:42:25 AM): Work around it.
madsatirist (2:42:45 AM): Because, when you rise above it, you can only go down.
machineofbones (2:42:48 AM): I still have no clue what I'm going to do at college though.
machineofbones (2:43:00 AM): I don't want to be a teacher.
madsatirist (2:43:03 AM): I didn't have a clue until two years ago.
madsatirist (2:43:09 AM): Then don't become a teacher.
machineofbones (2:43:18 AM): What can I do with a degree in creative writing, then?
madsatirist (2:43:28 AM): Honestly, I wouldn't want you teaching anyway.
madsatirist (2:43:31 AM): No offense.
machineofbones (2:43:37 AM): I wouldn't either.
machineofbones (2:43:51 AM): I'm not a good orator first off.
madsatirist (2:44:04 AM): Firstly sounds better.
madsatirist (2:44:14 AM): lol
madsatirist (2:44:23 AM): You're a wallflower.
machineofbones (2:44:28 AM): I'm tired.
machineofbones (2:44:29 AM): lol
madsatirist (2:44:31 AM): You know,
madsatirist (2:44:38 AM): maybe consider being an editor.
machineofbones (2:44:46 AM): Newspaper?
machineofbones (2:44:50 AM): Nah.
machineofbones (2:44:53 AM): Creative writing.
machineofbones (2:44:54 AM): Yeah.
madsatirist (2:44:55 AM): Sure, it's not the most flashy job in the world.
machineofbones (2:45:12 AM): I could see that working, maybe.
machineofbones (2:45:16 AM): Then write on the side.
madsatirist (2:45:22 AM): Very few creative writers make it through just being a writer.
madsatirist (2:45:33 AM): You need somehow to support yourself.
machineofbones (2:45:37 AM): Well of course. You start off.
machineofbones (2:45:38 AM): Yeah.
madsatirist (2:45:45 AM): Walt Whitman worked two jobs and wrote on the side.
madsatirist (2:45:57 AM): Well, technically one at a time.
madsatirist (2:46:16 AM): After he started finding success, he slid from one to the other,
madsatirist (2:46:28 AM): eventually quitting the construction and concentrating solely on poetry.
madsatirist (2:46:48 AM): I've got work in the morning.
machineofbones (2:46:58 AM): Then go.
madsatirist (2:47:07 AM): Think about what we talked about, okay?
madsatirist (2:47:07 AM): Sleep well, Mitch.
machineofbones (2:47:11 AM): Yes.
machineofbones (2:47:22 AM): At first I thought you were just being an asshole to me. Now I see you were just testing me.
madsatirist (2:47:40 AM): :-)
madsatirist signed off at 2:47:51 AM.
Comments (1) | Permalink

Radiohead- Lucky; Radiohead- Airbag; Radiohead- Exit Music (For a Film); Radiohead- Street Spirit (Fade Out)

I'm on a road
I'm on a road

This time
I feel my luck could change

Kill me Sarah
Kill me again
With love

It's gonna be a glorius day

Pull me out of the air crash
Pull me out of the wake
Cause I'm your super hero

We are standing on the edge

The head of state
Has called for me
By name

And I don't have time for him

It's gonna be
A glorius day

I feel my luck could change

Pull me out of the aircrash
Pull me out of the wake
Cause I'm your super hero

We are standing on the edge

We are standing on the edge

---

I love this song. Download it if you can find it, or else I'll give it to you when I see you on AIM and I'm on my mom's cable modem computer.

The lyrics don't even show how great this song is. It's just the way Thom Yorke sings it, and I especially like the guitar solo near the end.

Incidently, Sarah is the name of his Girlfriend (may be his wife now. I think she is. Not sure completely).

Beautiful song.

Beautiful.

Radiohead- Airbag
In the next world over
In a jackknifed juggernaut
I am born again

In the neon sign scrolling up and down
I am born again

In an interstellar burst
I am back to save the universe

In a deep sleep of the innocent
I am born again

In a fast German car
I'm amazed that I survived
An airbag saved my life

In an interstellar burst
I am back to save the universe

In an interstellar burst
I am back to save the universe
In an interstellar burst
I am back to save the universe

Radiohead- Exit Music (For a Film)
Wake from your sleep
The drying on your tears

Today
We escape
We escape

Pack
And get dressed
Before your father hears us

Before
All hell
Breaks loose

Please
Keep breathing
Don't lose
Your nerve

Breathe
Keep breathing

I can't do this
Alone

Sing
Us a song
A song to keep
Us warm
There's such a chill
Such a chill

You can laugh
A spineless laugh

We hope your rules and wisdom choke you.

And now
We are one
In everlasting peace

We hope
That you choke
That you choke

We hope
That you choke
That you choke

We hope
That you choke
That you choke

Radiohead- Street Spirit (Fade Out)
Rows of houses
All bearing down on me

I can feel death
Blue hand is touching me

All these things into position
All these things we'll one day swallow whole

And fade out again
We'll fade out

This machine will
Will not communicate
These thoughts and the strain I am under
Be a world child form a circle
Before we all
Go under

And fade out
Again
We'll fade out again

Cracked eggs dead birds
Scream as they fight for life
I can feel death
Can see its beady eyes

All these things into position
All these things are one day small

We'll fade out
Again
Fade out
Again

Immerse your soul in love.
Comments (0) | Permalink

Saturday, March 27, 2004

Rage Against the Machine- Wake Up

Come on!
Uggh!
Come on, although ya try to discredit
Ya still never read it
The needle, I'll thread it
Radically poetic
Standin' with the fury that they had in '66
And like E-Double I'm mad
Still knee-deep in the system's shit
Hoover, he was a body remover
I'll give ya a dose
But it can never come close
To the rage built up inside of me
Fist in the air, in the land of hypocrisy
Movements come and movements go
Leaders speak, movements cease
When their heads are flown
'Cause all these punks
Got bullets in their heads
Departments of police, the judges, the feds
Networks at work, keepin' people calm
You know they went after King
When he spoke out on Vietnam
He turned the power to the have-nots
And then came the shot
Yeah!
Yeah, back in this...
Wit' poetry, my mind I flex
Flip like Wilson, vocals never lackin' dat finesse
Whadda I got to, whadda I got to do to wake ya up
To shake ya up, to break the structure up
'Cause blood still flows in the gutter
I'm like takin' photos
Mad boy kicks open the shutter
Set the groove
Then stick and move like I was Cassius
Rep the stutter step
Then bomb a left upon the fascists
Yea, the several federal men
Who pulled schemes on the dream
And put it to an end
Ya better beware
Of retribution with mind war
20/20 visions and murals with metaphors
Networks at work, keepin' people calm
Ya know they murdered X
And tried to blame it on Islam
He turned the power to the have-nots
And then came the shot
Uggh!
What was the price on his head?
What was the price on his head!
I think I heard a shot
I think I heard a shot
I think I heard a shot
I think I heard a shot
I think I heard a shot
I think I heard, I think I heard a shot
'He may be a real contender for this position should he
abandon his supposed obediance to white liberal doctrine
of non-violence...and embrace black nationalism'
'Through counter-intelligence it should be possible to
pinpoint potential trouble-makers...And neutralize them,
neutralize them, neutralize them'
Wake up!
Wake up!
Wake up!
Wake up!
Wake up!
Wake up!
Wake up!
Wake up!
How long? Not long, cause what you reap is what you sow
Comments (0) | Permalink

An Airbag Saved My Life

Well, my dad apologized. That's good.

I think I'll be going to Ryan's then.

He says it is common human emotion. I guess so. But he loves me and I love him. . .and it's not hard to control your emotions.
Comments (0) | Permalink

E Pluribus, Unum.

I came downstairs and set the cleaning bleach on his bed. Without my intention it spilled all over the bed's comforter and I looked at for a moment thinking I was so very screwed. I cehcked the bottle as if I had never known what was in it and saw that it had bleach. I took some paper towels and began soaking the cleaner up and knew I should just tell him. I gathered up courage, knowing what was coming, and yelled up to my dad, "Kill me," and explained what I'd done. He came tearing down the stairs in perfect fashion as to the way I saw him coming in my mind.

The way my father will act to certain stimuli is so certainly predictable that I had already played what was about to happen all in my mind like a well-thought out actor might see his co-actor acting upon their part needing to be fulfilled. In my mind, my father came down, his 250-pound girth flying freely down the stairs as fast as he could, his belly coming at me first then him seeing the bleached comforter and scowling and exclaiming curses, and telling me I was such an idiot, and that didn't I think?

That is exactly what happened. He came down and scowled, exclaiming that inner noise that is of anger and supreme annoyance. He told me couldn't I think? Didn't I know what I was doing?

I simply told him to calm down. To learn to control his emotions. I told him, why can't you just come down here and say: "Mitch, I know you didn't intend to pour that bleach there. I know you're human and I know you're beating yourself up over doing it. And I would like to say that it is all right, we all make mistakes and although this comforter is expensive, we can replace it and it'll all be fine."

But instead I had what he was telling me now. And when I told him that, as he was running back upstairs, he probably wasn't even listening to me. He told me to get to cleaning and I did that. I went in the bathroom and was wiping the counter and the sink when he came back in.

I began trying to explain things to him again, how he could have better reacted instead of being the usual way about it. He simply told me he didn't have any use for my "psycho babble", he'd had enough of me talking about Micheal Moore and all this other stuff.

I felt like I would just throw down everything I was doing in frustration. Emotion flooded into me. It was not anger, it was bitter frustration. It was a wonder as to how he can't even understand me.

I walked out and explained it all to him. I yelled in to the bathroom where he was that he didn't have to scream at me like he always did. He could've just told me it was a mistake and that was okay, be more careful next time. I told him, almost crying, tears touching my eyes but not able to come through because I wouldn't let them, that when I was speaking in my "psycho babble" I was speaking from my heart. I was telling him like I felt.

In Cracker Barrel, where we'd gone to eat, I had talked to him about Bowling for Columbine and how I wanted him to see the movie. I talked eloquently about it, I told him about it, I said every American should listen to it. He didn't seem to be listening then and when I said I'll just shut up then he said, no, I'm listening. I went on then but I doubted he was even listening to what I said. He told me he already knew about all these issues, and that he wasn't going to see the movie because he hated Moore.

Him saying he was sick of my "psycho babble" as a left the bathroom was like a slap to my face. A very hard slap to the face which hit me in the heart and made my veins bleed for him to understand what I was trying to do. I was simply trying to tell him how I felt about things.

It is too bad that when you speak your heart to someone, they can't even fucking hear you. When you speak to someone you love and tell them what you want to tell them because you love them, and you let yourself be vulnerable to them and open and let them feel you, it is just too fucking bad. It is too fucking bad that when you do that they don't even listen. They sit there and don't understand you're talking about what you're passionate about and what matters to you.

I told him, yelling into the bathroom from outside his room, that this is why our relationship will never go beyond me just loving him because he supports me. I said it all and I was almost in tears. I just wanted him to fucking understand. And then he walked out and I said did you even hear what I had said? All he said was that he couldn't hear me, he was under the toilet cleaning it. I felt even worse then but got control of myself. I now felt it was useless to tell him anything. That our relationship would be the same. That there was nothing I could do. That he had been like this ever since I had remembered him. That he'd always gotten me down when I did something wrong.

I remember being a kid and because I sat in the chair a certain way he'd tell me to sit in it right and yell at me to turn over in it right. I remembered that when I don't clean my room he would yell at me. When I didn't make my bed he would yell at me. When I told him I didn't really want a job in honesty he had yelled at me.

It's pointless. It's stupid. It's too frustrating. I'm sick of it.

Whenever I do something wrong I always hear some form of his voice yelling at me in the head. Especially if it is something small. If it is something insignificant. I beat myself down over it because that's what has happened so many times to me from him. And so I end up thinking I'm so stupid. I'm so worthless. I'm an idiot. I can't do anything right. I don't think. It goes on and on in my mind and it gets me in a terrible mood because I seemingly can't do anything right.

He means doing these things for the best, but the best is far from what it gives me.

When I continued cleaning the house I thought the whole time about how I hated the world and how fucked up it is, and how I wished people would actually listen to you when you speak from your heart. It's too bad that you can't even speak your heart. I decided it's useless to ever say anything to my father that I feel because he doesn't understand. He was once a teenager but he is a different person than me. He isn't as openminded as me and he doesn't understand. He just doesn't understand how numb with fear, with anger, with hate, with love, with every brim of every emotion I am and am feeling each day. So why even tell anyone how I feel?

It's just the silence of the lambs. It's just shut the fuck up and drive. It doesn't matter a fucking bit what I think about something. It doesn't matter to fight it. I can't topple anything. I can't even make someone understand how I feel. They can't even listen to me when I'm telling them something I feel passionate about or something that I feel always gets in the way of our relationship growing.

Just keep myself to myself. Just shut up and do what I'm told. Just be a slave. That's what it's about in this world today. There's only in intimate moments that you can fucking really be yourself. Otherwise no one else gives a shit about you.

To your boss you're just another slave for them that they pay. To your teacher you're just a student that needs to learn meaningless shit. To the politcians you might as well be fucking nothing, because that's what you are to them. What they care about isn't the people but it's putting fear into you. Melding you to what they think is right. Bush's war on Terror. What shit. What bullshit. We've got fucking more important shit to worry about than some stupid fear bridgade and crusade. We've got a lot of shit that's wrong with this country and the way this world works.

Sadly there's not a fucking thing I can do about it. The best way is to just go along with it and not speak my heart. My heart has no premise to anyone but those who will hear it. And those who will hear it are few and seem to think I'm just blabbering on about some dream or doing some "psycho babble."

Does it piss me off? Damn right it does. It makes me want to beat my head against a wall, it makes me want to just turn my back from all the shit that is in this world. It makes me want to see it all gone, annihilated. I don't give a fuck about it anymore. It'd be better if it wasn't here. It'd be better if things were simple and just living.

There's nothing I can do.

You think I ain't worth a dollar, but I feel like a fucking millionaire. I'm worth more than some George Bush or some shit.

There is not a thing I can do.

In God we trust indeed.

If there's a God I'd like to spit on him and I'd like to tell him how fucked up he made thsi world. I'd also like to make him die.

He's already died to me a long time ago.

This country is based on liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Yeah, that's fucking right. The pursuit of happiness is working your how life for this country I don't givea shit about. This liberty is working in some society that tells you how to live when you'd rather live yourself.

E pluribus, unum. From many, one.

From many one my ass.

We as Americans think we're so high and mighty.

We're not.
Comments (9) | Permalink

The Human Psychology They Will Never Come to See

The Human Psychology They Will Never Come to See
I
I gag myself
to see myself
to show myself
that I am myself
as I see myself

I feel myself
to know myself
to be myself
as I want myself

I feel small
I feel small
I see small
I see small

I feel small

I see small

I look at myself
through myself
in myself
to have myself
as I be myself

I kill myself
to bleed myself
to thin myself
to hold myself
as I bruised myself

Oh I feel
I feel small
Oh I feel
I see small
Oh I feel
I feel small
Oh I feel
I see small

I feel small
I see small
I feel small
I see small

I see small
in these arms
I feel small
in these arms
I see small
in these arms

I hold myself
in my arms
I hold my arms
on my back
in my arms
I hold myself
cradle myself
to feel
I hold myself
I feel myself
to feel

To feel
I do it to feel
To feel
I do it to feel
To feel to feel
I do it to feel

Hold me
I hold me
Hold me
I hold me
Alone
Hold me
I hold me
Hold me
I hold me
Alone
Hold me
I hold me
Hold me
Alone

Alone
I hold me
to myself
on myself
in myself
around myself
over myself
Alone


This is myself
These are myself
It is myself
All of it is myself
No one can take myself
Steal myself
Be myself
Know myself

I see myself
I am myself
I feel myself

I see myself
I am myself
I feel myself

I feel myself
to touch
the touch
to my fingers

I feel myself
to touch
the touch
to my hands

I feel myself
to touch
the touch
to ease
the feeling
to make the feeling
to create the feeling

I feel myself
to myself
on myself
all over myself
to touch
the feeling
to let it be alive
to myself

I have myself
for myself
I have myself
I have it for me
I have myself
I have it for me

None of it is here
but me
None of it is here
but me

But me
But me
But me

Release me
Please
Release me
Please

Please
Oh please
Release me
for myself
to myself
on myself
around myself
all over myself

Release me

II
Shut your eyes
the lashes closed
Shut your eyes
the lashes closed
the sockets closed
the pupils unexposed

Shut your eyes
the lashes closed
Shut your eyes
the lashes closed

I see with my eyes closed
I see
I see with my eyes closed
I see

How can this be?
How can this be?
I see with my eyes closed
I see
I see with my eyes closed
I see

It is you to me to I to these
It is me to you to them to we
It is I to who to some to these
It is all to nothing to every to we

It is not here not there not about
It is not there not here not about
I pout I cry I spout I bout
I cry I spout I bout I pout
Who are these and those
This and that that is we hold

Who are these this that and those
When eyes are shut and lashes closed
Who are you to me to I to them
When eyes are shut and lashes closed

Exposed
Be exposed
Open wide be exposed
Exposed
Be exposed
open wide be exposed

I see you in that pose
I see you wearing a rose
I see you in that pose
I see you wearing a rose

The heart speaks louder
Than what is seen
The heart bleeds louder
Than what it means
The heart knows better
Than what it breathes
The heart is greater
It is not a machine
It is alive it is a being

The eyes speak louder
Than nothing there is
The eyes blear louder
Than nothing they hear
The eyes see nothing
More than they fear
The eyes are windows
Vantages where we fear
more than when we're near

The eyes see nothing
In the small Earth
see nothing worthwile
to touch so worth
The eyes see nothing
They are flirts
And glean on over
The reality of the world
Making it not twirl
Making it not whirl
Making it mechanical
and sprawl in on
the bodies
and sprawl in on
the assets

For eyes are holes
And holes are meant to be entered
And holes that can see what enters
Should not be holes
And holes should not hold so as they do
They should not glance where they go
Eyes shall blind as and we do not even know

The heart knows better
Than what it breathes
The heart bleeds more
It is not a machine
The eyes give it vision
The heart give it worth
The eyes give it clarity
The heart give it hurt

I close my eyes
To breathe with my heart
I close my eyes
To breathe with my heart

The breathing is a wheeze
It coughs it sneezed
I cannot do this right
I cannot breathe without a fight
I close my eyes
To breathe my heart
And in my throat
I catch it sharp
And my eyes want to see it
And focus the view
But I shall not
See the hurt so true

I stiched a name into my heart
With words which matter
Which have much to say
I stiched a name into my heart
The operation severs the art
It awakens it all and groans here
The blood vessels are what you should fear

The blood vessels are what you should fear
Full of anger anguish here
Full of meaning breathing feeling that sears
The blood vessels are what you should fear
Eyes have nothing, mean nothing
Here

What I see
is more near
The heart that beats
Thuds my ears

III
The android
Is a human machine
The android
Is still human but a machine
The android is human
But still a machine

You seek to tear me, rend me
Bend me to believe
You seek to tend me, fend me
Bend me to believe

You seek to take my heart
as it bleeds.

You will not.

I am an android
I am a human machine
I am an android
I am a human machine.

You will not numb me
You will not dumb me
You will not make mechanical
I will not be a mechanical animal

You seek to take my heart
as it bleeds.
You will not take it
that is me.

You will not take it
that is me.

You will not take it
that is me

I will be an andriod

I will be a human machine.

And in your presence
I will be a machine.

And in her presence
I will be a human being.
Comments (6) | Permalink

Friday, March 26, 2004

Amorphis- Alone.

Amorphis-Alone.mp3

Tear-dimmed rememberance
In the womb of time
Breathe upon me
Possessed by the passion
Fate will set you free
Infertile
Chaste be the precious
When flesh is an enemy
Fair weather man

Step aside from the way of a better man than you
So you fall at his feet he's the one who betrays you
It's the servant's devotion, fatherly care
Stand up

There are no flowers on your grave
There are no chains
There I keep chanting for the forgotten names

There are no flowers on your grave
There are no chains
There I keep chanting for the forgotten names

Why you feel so empty
And still have everything
It's fullfilment
I've got more companions
When I'm all alone
Flesh is fetching

Step aside from the way of a better man than you
So you fall at his feet he's the one who betrays you
It's the servant's devotion, fatherly care
Stand up

There are no flowers on your grave
There are no chains
There I keep chanting for the forgotten names

There are no flowers on your grave
There are no chains
There I keep chanting for the forgotten names

Step aside from the way of a better man than you
So you fall at his feet he's the one who betrays you
It's the servant's devotion, fatherly care
Stand up

---

Please download the song and comment in here. Tell me what you think.

This is one of my more special songs. To me anyway.
Comments (1) | Permalink

Thursday, March 25, 2004

Gyroscope

Inside out you can't cope
my gyroscope

Witness the fall from grace
you shed your skin
change if it pleases you
just don't give in

Inside out you can't cope
my gyroscope

Quiet now she said
you're waking up the dead

Cradle the excuse
in love with the abuse

Handle it with ease
it's a dignified disease

Soul searching breaks you down
You'll never learn
Annihilate yourself
All things must burn

Inside out you can't cope
my gyroscope
Inside out you can't cope
my gyroscope
Inside out you can't cope
my gyroscope
Inside out you can't cope
my gyroscope

---

I'm sure everyone already knows this, but I feel I need to pound it perpetually into your head.

Whoever likes to sit here all day and fool around with Geometry and learn all this crap about Geometry is one mad bastard. And this one mad bastard should be shot on sight.

People should be flocking back in time to find this one mad bastard and assassinate him so he can't give fruition to the terrible, caustic fucker that is Geometry.

I don't want to do this Geometry, so I'll go for a walk now.

But as I'm walking I'll have this stupid Geometry assignment in the back of my head, and it will plague my thoughts. The voice giving it articulation will sound much like this: "WHEN YOU GET HOME, MITCH, YOU GET TO TRY TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT. YOU'RE HAVING TROUBLE FINDING THE ARE AND PERIMETER OF A TRIANGLE AND OTHER SUCH POLYGONS AND YOU CAN'T BELIEVE AND YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW YOU CAN'T DO THIS. YOU DON'T WANT TO DO IT BUT I'M GOING TO MAKE YOU DO IT BECAUSE YOU NEED TO HAVE THIS FIGURED OUT OR ELSE YOU FAIL THIS CLASS. AND IF YOU FAIL THIS CLASS THEN YOU'RE SCREWED. AND IF YOU DON'T GET A BETTER GRADE THAN YOU DID FIRST QUARTER OF THIS SECOND SEMESTER, YOU SHOULD JUST FEEL USELESS BECAUSE THIS CRAP ISN'T THAT HARD, SUPPOSEDLY. YOU SUPPOSEDLY JUST DON'T HAVE THE KNACK FOR IT, BUT HAVE TO DO IT ANYWAY."

Shut up voice. I'll drown you with music and with the mechanical, beautiful feeling of walking. I'll kill you. I'll nmurder you. And I won't even put a gun to your head. I won't even pull a trigger.

I'll just use silence and the power to destroy things that don't even exist unless you let them appear and bother you and belliger you.

I'll murder you, I'll do it and you'll be dead and won't be able to speak until you are able to rise from the dead on the seventh day. I'll do it.

Comments (2) | Permalink