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Monday, November 10, 2003
This is for you, Jenna.
I am now accepting applications for those who would like to marry me. I only have a select few people whom I would choose, but I suppose I can be swayed. I'm that fickle, folks.
Here's the drill:
1) Send me a PM detailing why you want to marry someone such as me. Do it in a creative fashion--one that catches my eyes (poetry would be a prime example.) Be sure that the proposal is as verbose and as lengthy as to why you would marry me as it can be.
2) Get as many people that recommend me to marry you as you can. Make them write verbose and hotly creative pieces which scream for me to give marriage to your hand. The more the merrier. You must have at least two. More is always less, though. And less is always better than more.
3) Dedicate some part of your signature to me--and make it apparent. Put in bold letters, "Mitch is my long-lost lover," or some other corny phrase. Try to make it as funny as you can, and as short as you can. Because I understand that signatures require other things as well.
4) Be sure, if you have a My O site, to post yet another conveyance of your undying love and want at marriage. Make me proud.
5) Try to include a picture of yourself in some wild pose...or suggestive pose which shall make me really want your hand in marriage. While this isn't required...I highly recommend it. It will sway me. I'm a sucker for sucking up, as well as a sucker for faces.
6) I allow the right to have more than one marriage at a time. I allow myself to be the whore of OB. And all-in-all, each thing you send me or say about me I allow to be used by me in my sig, or otherwise.
Now get to work, and marry me!
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