Monday, February 9, 2004

Mitch has been avoiding posting here about his life for many reasons. The main one being how Alex talked to me that one day (as far as I would want to admit it). I'm just being honest. So don't worry about it, Alex.

I feel tired right now. As if I'm just floating around. Everything is thin and without contour and shape and line. It's without form. I'm in some kind of Monday daze.

I'm telling myself to keep on things. To keep at them. And it's working.

You've noticed all the stories I've been posting. I've been making myself write each and every night, and I've decided I'll just be posting that here instead of blog entries of "my life" (more often than not, anyway) so I think that'll work fine.

I've become pretty non-existent on OB. I suppose it's going to be a lot like that. With the advent of v7, things are changing on there for me (but I can't mention it, because what stays in the staff lounge stays there till otherwise noted).

I bought Heart of Darkness yesterday. Along with Frankenstein, and also Silence of the Lambs. Currently I'm reading Michael Connelly's The Poet, and I'm halfway and more through it. It's 400-ish pages. It's good so far, great in some areas, but it's getting to the point where it's too drawn out for me. To the point where I want to book to stop being so muddled and slow and just get roaring. It should happen soon.

Getting my Geometry test back today didn't help at all.

Let me explain something.

In my Geometry class, the teacher, Mr. Kosse, always makes reference to a five-letter word he has stapled up above by his desk. Five letters. Just like there's five fingers on a hand if you count the thumb. Which I count the thumb.

Think. It says it in different colors for each letter.

Think. And I guess that's right. That's what the class is about. It's about thinking.

This Geometry class is harder than one I'd have, if, say, I was taking the class from a different teacher. I know this. And I tried to do this, too. I tried to get into Informal, but I couldn't. My schedule was locked because of Journalism.

Well, next year I'm not taking Journalism. I don't like it. It's boring and I've gotten crap stories each issue. I just like writing columns.

Anyway--back to Geometry. I got 66/100 on my test. 66/100. You know how bad that is? I wanted to just sit there and slap myself repeatedly as many times as I could. 66/100?

Oh. And here's a good thing too. I have 64.3 per cent in the class. That's 63.4%. That's a D. His grading scale goes 50, 60, 70, 80, 90. F, D, C, B, A.

I have a lot of work to do. I'm going to have to try my hardest.

Rather than look at this and give up, as I usually do, I'm going to apply myself harder.

Atticus Finch once said, which, incidently, is the voice of Harper Lee (since she speaks through him, it's her book). Atticus said courage is trying even though you know you're down and out. That's courage. Courage is doing something when you know you'll lose.

That's what I'll do. But I don't know if I'll lose. So it isn't courage, more or less, it's determination. Survival.

The bell just rang. I have to go.

Chemisty. Chemistry. What a fun class. I really did like last semester better.

I'm going to rise above this. I'm going to do it.
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