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Sunday, September 14, 2003
Posts of Nothing hath wings.
I started reading Julius Ceasar for no reason last night. The play, of course, by Shakespeare.
Mm.
Right now I need some food badly. All I have eaten all day is a bowl of cereal...and that was about seven or so hours ago. Since then I have not eaten anything.
Hopefully after I eat something I will be able to do my homework. I've been putting it off all week...I've been trying not to think about it either. Because then that reminds me that I have this DDR story shit to worry about first thing when I get to school...I still need to find two more sources and interview them, plus I need to go and get pictures taken of someone DDRing. Plus I need to write the story.
Ack. I've just been trying not to think about it all this weekend, just relax like I usually do. But yet everytime I have tried to this only comes back and bothers me.
I worry to much I suppose.
Otherwise I have plenty of other homework crap. The rest of today is booked for that I suppose.
I have to rewrite my column I wrote about getting fired. The people that read it loved it, but they think it needs to start off when it was my first day on the job. And I want to hammer the reader with as many things as I can...smells, senses, feelings. Basically I want to do it so much that the reader will feel violated and raped from reading it. I don't mean that literally...basically figuratively.
Ah well.
Right now I feel empty. I need some food. Usually I am depressed I say when I feel like this, but I don't want to be depressed all the time anymore. So I push it away. Because you know, really, you do have control over your feelings. Some people rather unconciously make themselved depressed because they feel they need more than they have.
I see that often, especially whenever I read Sara's posts of her being depressed. But she readily admits it's selfish.
But what can I say. We are selfish beings. We are taught to care about ourselves more than anything, and to further ourselves in any matter we can.
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