Sunday, March 6, 2005

   Yay more picys...of me
I'm photophobic but every once ina while I'll take a lot of pictures of me but then I
crawl back into my lil hole and hide till the next century. Hehe I am weird that way. I not so cute but some one rly likes the way
I look, soo I'll-hmm I don't no.

where has my mind gone?

Now u start to wonder...

Oh that's muh perttyful eye.

Again perttyful eye.

Now this aint me but he's hott, hott as hell. Its Davey Havok of AFI.
Comments (5) | Permalink

   Stab me with a sword and put me over a fire
She wont stop gosh I DONT WANT TO KILL MY SELF!!!!!!!!! DO u ppl get it, i dont want to kill my self yet!!!! I dont neeed to die but i guess i have to to make you guys relize i didnt want to go yet. DAMN HUMANITY. ~Ahem~ Can you plz plzzz pester her she called me a stupid gothic fucker and told me to go yea no what it is ~ahem hint hint~ ~choughgosuckacock~ she told me to do that. ~Sigh~oh well does any one no how to block ppl from e-mailing u????
Comments (8) | Permalink

Saturday, March 5, 2005

   Another reason why i hate ppl.
OF ALL THE MOST INSENSITIVE THINGS TO DO!!!!!!!
A gurl that was a
so called "friend" of mine
on my msn msger sent me this and so on:
" From: "Alexia L"
To: abbeysan@hotmail.com
Date: Fri, 04 Mar 2005 23:49:14 -0600

wat the hell is wrong with u? u have
some serious problems. who would want to
kill themselves? and i know u blocked me
and i dont fuckin care. but all i know is
that u r psyco. i never liked talkin to u cuz
u were just so stupid and crazy. u should seriously
think about who ur goin to hurt if u
kill urself instead of sittin in a
warm bath slitting ur wrist. how dumb.

From: "Abbey San"
To: volleyball_25@hotmail.com
Subject: U R A DUMB ASS VOLLEYBALL_25
Date: Sat, 05 Mar 2005 16:27:42 +0000


I didnt block u I loged off b/c i went to sleep.
Ur such a dumb ass nver juge ppl b4 u
acctualy meet them at least I HAVE REAL
FRIENDS UN LIKE U WHO HAS TO TAKE EVERY
THING OUT ON OTHER PPL U BITCH. UR DUMB
TO FOR JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS STUPID ASS.
UR KIND IS THE REASON Y I CHOSE
THIS RODE OF LIFE. U EGOSATISCICAL MANIAC.
UR EGOS SO HUGE UR MUM WONT HELP U NOTICE
ALL THE WRONG U'VE DONE.
From : Alexia L
Sent : Saturday, March 5, 2005 7:40 PM
To : abbeysan@hotmail.com
Subject : RE: U R A DUMB ASS VOLLEYBALL_25

no i do have real friends and
u dont cuz if u r goin to kill
urself than u must have a very
lonely life. if u had real friends
then u wouldnt be do that. and how
can i be jumping to conclusions if u
told me how u were goin to kill urself?
and im not the maniac u r. ur mom doesnt
know wat ur doin that is if u even have a
mom. so basically all the stuff u
wrote to me desccribs u. i dont
fuckin care if u call me a dumb ass
volleyball_25 even though that doesnt
make since u stupid gothic fucker."
========================================
She called me stupid!! I may be slow
but i am not stupid. It just takes me
awhile to get things like maybe a rly
hard math problem i just dont get it
some times that dont make me stupid.
I have a standing A+ in Algebra A so HA!
but my other classes need some
working on but oh well i have good enough grades.
_________________________________________
(Its an right side down cross--> +.
I like this song so i'll put
the whole thing on:
"People Hate Me"-Muderdolls:
I'm wretched, I'm infested,
rejected and infected
I'm a loser, I'm a winner,
a born-again sinner
Cut my throat and watch me
bleed, addicted tragedy
And I hate you and you hate me
So stand in line motherfuckers
don't waste my time
[pre-chorus]
See me in the headlines
Manipulate your simple minds
So put your hands up and praise
I'm your god and you're my slave
[chorus]
And people hate me, cause
I'm better than you
And people hate me
And that's the motherfucking truth
People hate me and you can all fuck off
I'm perfect, pissed off,
beautiful, I'm God

I'm a hooker, I'm your priest
I'm you brand new disease
I'm Satan with distortion,
your overdue abortion
And now I'm singing out of key,
the God of your T.V.
And all you children will worship me
So give me drugs, your bitches,
and your S.T.D's
[pre-chorus/chorus]
I'm wicked and addicted,
middle-finger double-fisted
I'm neurotic drug-induced
and chemically abused
Cut my throat and watch me bleed
Addicted tragedy
And I hate you and you hate me
Wipe the snot onto my sleeve
For I'm your new disease

See me in the headlines
Manipulate your simple minds
So put your hands up and praise,
I'm your God...

I'm homicide on parade,
a bloody nose, serenade
I'm a human hand grenade
I'll never rot and never go away)
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I am AbbeySan@hotmail.com.
Plz i ask of you ppl to pester her she made
me sad and I am getting better i am moving
away from my suicidal needs I still think
about commiting suicide but not now I am
getting better every day. I feel happier
every day now I am in extreme bliss b/c
of A good friend who has asked me something.
Dan I love ya hun. Its b/c of him I feel better.
Hes the nicest guy you could ever meet and
hes funny some times.
Dan hope you can IM me soon and
I'll try to call you.
But of all the most rudest things
she asked me if i WAS
(was being the main word)
gonna commit suicide i said "yeah" and
i told her how. But like I say
"Becareful of what you
ask 4 b/c some times its what you wouldnt
want to hear." But she did ask so
~puts on a smirk~oh well
~smiles showing her sharp teeth~
I guess I am doing better after me
Mum and Da divorce, me and me Mum will
be moving to AZ Phoenix so yay
~throws confetii around~ WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.
I will be sooo glad to move away from this hell
hole of a city but I will be
ferther away from you Dan ~sniff~
oh well ^_^ love ya all of ya but
most of all i love you Dan.
~huggs and kisses for my bestest guy
friend Dan he no y~

Mood:Umm im happy, how bout u??
Music:AFI-...But Home Is Nowhere
Comments (3) | Permalink

   A New Life
I saw you walk towards me.
A new life unfolded before me.
I waited quietly for you to come and you did.
I proved them wrong, all of them, the ones
Who said that i should give it up and kill my
Self.
BUt I waited and you came to me.
Now a new life becomes known before us.
We walk the path hand in hand, facing all
Evil, all who judged us said that it would
Never work. But we did all right in the long
Run. But before a new life wasnt an option.
But now its there before us we tred down it.
We dont pray but know that we are alright.
We dont cry but try to lie about all of the
Wrong you've done all the hatred runs true.
We all have a new life unfolding before us.
Its there but we just chose not to notice it.
But you and I did and now we have a new life.
A new life with out pain and hate and sorrow.
We dont need it all we need is eachother for always and an etrinity.
I saw you walk towards me.
A new life unfolded before me.
I waited quietly for you to come and you did.
I proved them wrong, all of them, the ones
Who said that i should give it up and kill my
Self.
But i chose to wait here quietly.
Knowing that you'd come to me, and you did.
A NEW LIFE.
A NEW LIFE.
A NEW LIFE.
---------------------------
To day I feel happy not so sad but glad maybe b/c of the song by AFI that i am listing to "...But Home Is Nowhere"-AFI
Comments (2) | Permalink

Friday, March 4, 2005

   I watch...
I watch all the pertty normal ppl
Simply walk by.
Not noticing me, not at all.
I sit on the school bus
Put my hands on the window and watch
You walk by.
I tryed to tell you that I love you but I can't.
I watch you walk by.
I watch all the pertty normal people
Walk by.
All the pertty normal ppl
Simply walk by.
I want, I watch, I cry, I try.
"Give it up" they said
"He'll never love you the way you love him"
They said but I have to prove them wrong.
Have to always prove them right now.
Love me, hate me , burn me.
Smell the decay.
Smell the rot.
I watch all the pertty normal ppl
Simply walk by.
Don't pass me by.
Didnt do a thing now I watch.
Now I just watch.
I watch...
I watch...
I watch...you.
-------------------------
I dedicate this to a good friend whom I love like a... b/f he no's who he is.
Comments (4) | Permalink

Thursday, March 3, 2005

   Links to different sites
~~~~~~~~~~~Links to VF~~~~~~~~~~
Check out my VampireFreaks Profile













I will update thise l8er
Comments (6) | Permalink

Wednesday, March 2, 2005

   I wish I may I wish I might that my dog won't die tonight
My dog is deathly ill and the Vet says that she may not make it through the night, I just hope she does b/c shes been with me since I was but a young one. Well I may take a leave of absence b/c of her and + love her to death. I've always confided in her with all my problems and now I fear that my wish of me dieing first and then her following me into death long after. I may die tonight just to be with my dog well bye oh and The Broken Heart welcome to the family of VF hope u have fun there and also my s/n is Johnny_call_me_Nny_ all of you guys can look for me on there.
Heres my link:
Johnny_call_me_Nny_ at Vampirefreaks.com - gothic pictures, industrial music,
gothic clothing

Comments (1) | Permalink

Tuesday, March 1, 2005

   Ok ppl lets c if this damned thing will let muh picy show





Comments (8) | Permalink

Monday, February 28, 2005

   Though
All this time I thought u loved
Me and only me though I was a
Fool with foolish thoughts: A
Man whose mind nos no bounds and A heart that will stay true to his
Only love.
But i was wrong about u though I
Had a mind I gave it all away to Be with u and i had my feet bound
And tied to find out that I would Never run or hide or even play The way i use to but even though I was foolish I was foolish with Good intent and never harmed not-A-thing but now i have killed u.
Though I loved u i had to kill u In retrobuition of all ur sins

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well I hope u guys liked that poem althow it does not make any sence.
Comments (0) | Permalink

   Ok ppl lets c if this damned thing will let muh picy show

Comments (0) | Permalink