Wednesday, June 1, 2005

   I HATE MY SISTER. (Warning, that's all this post is about.)

Mood: Annoyed and tired..>< Music: None..v.v; Grr I hate my sister, she wakes me up at 5:30 to watch over the heathen of a niece, but my sister goes and takes her, and has her lay down with me. She did that so then I wouldn't be able to go back asleep..><; If she was asleep to begin with then she should've just let her stay in her room in her bed. I would've herd her if she was to wake up, I'm not a heavy sleeper, I wake up at the smallest noises...><; To give you a more understanding of what's going on here the load down...Okay, my grandmother-in-law is having knee surgeory next week, (I wasn't supposed to come over until the weekend before she had the knee surgeory ><). Afterwards my grandmother-in-law (who usually watches them) has to go to rehab for a while. I maybe here for half or the whole month of June, but I wont allow that, I couldn't stand it, I'd go crazy. I know I'll end up calling my mom and telling her I want to go home. I don't see why I can't babysit them at my house. There, I'm familiar with everything and know where everything is. I hate being around my sister because then she has me do EVERYTHING, and I'm not going to let her boss me around like she does, it's always, "Rae do this,"; "Rae get this,"; Rae, do that."; I'm not going to put up with that for a whole freaking month. Even my brother-in-law Michael thinks it's wrong that she goes and bosses me around. My sister and I can't absolutely get along, no matter how hard we try, she always does everything to benefit her in her own ways. Now here's a little news flash for her..."!I have plans on the weekends!" I'm either going to go home for the weekend or if I have somewhere else to go, I'll go there because most likely my mother will be taking the little brat on the weekend like she always does, meaning I wont ever get away from her. I don't know how long I'll give myself before I call my mother in tears telling her I want to go home, and she'll probably get all mad and tell me that I have to stay here, but I don't want to, I will get out of it one way or the other, I'm not her personal maid, I get enough of that at home to begin with. Ah...x.x I wont get to make wallpapers now, and by the time I get home my Macromedia Fireworks program will have expired. I took 5 hours of my life to download that, now to not even use it. -Growls.- Well I'm going to go and lay down, knowing my luck right when I do the brat that I love sooo much..(Note the sarcasim.) will most likely wake up. I hope you guys have a great day while I suffer. Ending Music: Home, Three Days Grace "Home" I’ll be coming home Just to be alone Cause I know you’re not there And I know that you don’t care I can hardly wait to leave this place No matter how hard I try You’re never satisfied This is not a home I think I’m better off alone You always disappear Even when you’re here This is not my home I think I’m better off alone Home, home, this house is not a Home, home, this house is not a home By the time you come home I’m already stoned You turn off the TV And you scream at me I can hardly wait Till you get off my case No matter how hard I try You’re never satisfied This is not a home I think I’m better off alone You always disappear Even when you’re here This is not my home I think I’m better off alone Home, home, this house is not a Home, home, this house is not a Home, home, this house is not a Home, home, this house is not a home I’m better off alone No matter how hard I try You’re never satisfied This is not a home I think I’m better off alone You always disappear Even when you’re here This is not my home I think I’m better off alone Home, home, this house is not a Home, home, this house is not a Home, home, this house is not a Home, home, this house is not a home

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Tuesday, May 31, 2005

   Gr, I don't wanna...x.x

Mood: Grumpy, tired..x.x! Music: So Cold, Breaking Benjamin Gah!! I have to stay over at my sisters for a couple of weeks >< I specifically told her that I would only stay over for a week, but no she got my annoying cousin Kayla to come over and now I have to stay over next week. Well here's a news flash for my sister, "I'm not babysitting for her, during my whole summer before I go to college!" Meep, I need to be cool about this, I need to think of more positive things...(Gets homesick easily.) Grah. Oh by the way just to add a edit thing to my last post is that, I do have my own computer, but we have stupid dial up, which also means I can't talk on the phone because I don't have my own phone line. I think I'd go absolutely crazy if I didn't have my own computer, considering that my dad is on his from the moment he gets home from work, to the moment he goes to bed...I think it's pretty sad, I'm not even on my computer all that much.... While I'm over at my sisters house, I'll get to watch some cool movies that I haven't gotten to watch yet, like lastnight we watched Blade: Trinity. ^^ Hehehe that was awsome, but I think some unknown force didn't want us to watch the ending because it opened the dvd player all by itself, with no explanation because the remote was clearly sitting between my brother-in-law and I. Also once during the movie it started to fast forward itself..@.@ I say that they have a haunted remote? On another note, my brother-in-law is pretty cool. He likes all the music I like so I'll have music to listen too, and plus he has like over a 100 albums on his computer..^^! I always have a field day on his computer, and he lets me use his account...O.o He gave me his password. He also likes anime in a way, he likes Yu-Gi-Oh. I believe he has all the dvds of it, and just about all the cards, and plus 'his' room is full of figurines fromt he anime, along with Star Wars, and The Ninja Turtles. Well that's enough about him. "So Cold" Crowded streets are cleared away One by One Hollow heroes separate As they run You're so cold Keep your hand in mine Wise men wonder while Strong men die [Chorus] Show me how it ends it's alright Show me how defenseless you really are satisfied and empty inside That's alright, let's give this another try If you find your family, don't you cry In this land of make-believe, dead and dry You're so cold, but you feel alive Lay your hand on me one last time [Chorus x2] It's alright [x9] In my hope to comment on sites this week or sometime soon I believe has been shotdown, and hopefully I might be able to revive it..@.@ I really wish I could comment on everyones sites..-Pouty face- I miss reading the posts. Well I'm going to be going now. See you around. Ending Music: 69 Tea, Seether

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Monday, May 30, 2005

   Gaming!

Mood: Bed time sleepy. Blah Music: Niki FM, Hawthorne Heights Heheh, I paused the game so that I could update my site..^^! I'm playing FMA right now and I'm about to beat again so that I can beat again...O.o; I have stuff left over to get...@.@ Ailahwolf let me barrow her PS2..^^! Thank you, you're such a great freind. Today or yesterday? was rather boring...x.x My dad jumped on the internet right when Ailahwolf left and that was at around 12:00 PM and he didn't get off until 8:00 PM. I had asked my father politely to use the phone and he said in just a minute....I asked him that around 5:00 PM....Yeah right, I had to go and have my mom get him to get off the internet, and my father was telling my mother that he had only been up for a 'couple' of hourse. Bull f'ing crap, my mom knows better than that...^^! "Niki FM" Let's go down now into the darkness of your thoughts hurry up now we're waiting for us to fall I fall to pieces now (I fall to pieces now) a broken mirror (I fall to pieces) in your life The silence in black and white falling forward as she walks toward the light I KNOW I'm outside of your window with my radio I sleep with one eye open so I can see you breathing (I sleep with one eye open) I follow your chest home Until I, (so I can see you breathing) I can see you, I can hear you breathe in exhale The silence in black and white I KNOW I'm outside of your window with my radio I KNOW I'm outside of your window with my radio KNOW KNOW I'm outside of your window with my radio (so I can see you breathing) I'm outside of your window with my radio (so I can see you breathing) I'm outside of your window with my radio (so I can see you breathing) I'm outside of your window with my radio you are the only station you play the song I know you are the song I know Well I'm think I'm going to go back to the game..^^! Oh and sorry that I still haven't had time yet to comment on everyones site, this week and this next week is going to be pretty busy, so feel special if I do make it to your site...^^! Try to see you all around. Laters. End Music: Simple Design, Breaking Benjamin

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Sunday, May 29, 2005

   I'm Actually Watching T.V! O.O

Mood: Sleepy like always..o.o; Playing FMA Music: Faint, Linkin Park Time posting: 12:07 A.M Eight minutes ago of yesterday was pretty interesting, considering I was sorta asleep while watching Samurai Champloo..o.o; -Hides from fans.- Sorries, I don't find it that interesting, I think I'll stick with Rurouni Kenshin..<3 =P Please don't kill mes...^^! I believe I'm entitled to my opinion on which shows I like and which shows I don't like. I'm waiting for 1:00 A.M. so I can watch Fooly Cooly, and Trigun. I've seen the first and last episodes of FLCL. It's weird that every time I have watched FLCL I only get to see the beginning and ending, but then there's only like what, 6 episodes...x.x! "Faint" I am a little bit of loneliness a little bit of disregard Handful of complaints but I can’t help the fact that everyone can see these scars I am what I want you to want what I want you to feel But it's like no matter what I do, I can't convince you, to just believe this is real So I let go, watching you, turn your back like you always do Face away and pretend that I'm not But I'll be here 'cause you're all that I got [Chorus] (I can't feel the way I did before) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) (Time won't heal this damage anymore) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) I am a little bit insecure a little unconfident Cause you don't understand I do what I can but sometimes I don't make sense I am what you never wanna say but I've never had a doubt It's like no matter what I do I can't convince you for once just to hear me out So I let go watching you turn your back like you always do Face away and pretend that I'm not But I'll be here 'cause you're all that I've got [Chorus] (I can't feel the way I did before) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) (Time won't heal this damage anymore) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) (No) (Hear me out now) (You're gonna listen to me, like it or not) (Right now) (Hear me out now) (You're gonna listen to me, like it or not) (Right now) (I can't feel the way I did before) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) [Chorus] (I can't feel the way I did before) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) (Time won't heal this damage anymore) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) I can't feel Don't turn your back on me I won't be ignored Time won't heal Don't turn your back on me I won't be ignored Okay well I'm going now some I continue to beat the PS2 game of Full Metal Alchemist once again..XD Oh, and Samuri Champloo fans, please don't torture me...-Looks around innocently.- ^^; See you around. Ending Music: Just For, Nickleback

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Saturday, May 28, 2005

   It's a sad thought, but happy to look back without shedding a tear.

Mood: Tired..(Seems like I always am.) Relieved Music: Believe, Breaking Benjamin Yay, it's all finally over. I am now a 2005 graduate. It actually went pretty quick to me. All the speeches were great, and tear jerkers, but I managed not to cry somehow..^^ I got a silver chord for my GPA, that's the second best. After we the ceremony was over, we marched back to our assigned classrooms and got a big vanilla envelope with all that we've done through our 13 to 14 years of school. It's really cool looking back at them. Ha! I looked back at my Elementary records and realized how naughty I was back then, and how much I grew up. Hmm, I remember in third grade..I wouldn't turn in my homework, so in order for me to pass I had to go summer school. Hehe, I think that's enough remembering for now. Don't tread the water Just stay still I'll not be bothered By you until I'm picking sides And pulling the strings I'm living lies And shedding the skin I'm open wide And letting you in I'm wronging rights Believe I don't care what you want I just want mine Shut up Smart little bitch I don't need lies I don't care what you want I just want mine Get up Force it to fit Confined inside Don't pull me under Into the deep I often wonder How it should be I'm picking sides And pulling the strings I'm living lies And shedding the skin I'm open wide And letting you I'm wronging rights Believe I don't care what you want I just want mine Shut up Smart little bitch I don't need lies I don't care what you want I just want mine Get up Force it to fit Confined inside I don't care what you want I just want mine I don't care what you want I just want mine Shut up Smart little bitch I don't need lies I don't care what you want I just want mine Get up Force it to fit Confined inside My dead eyes My bestfriend Ailahwolf got to spend the night at my house, which is great..^^! My mother is going to take us out to eat for breakfast. We're going to go to the Golden Corral which I think has such an awsome breakfast lay out. Mmmm food..>->; Well I better depart so I can get ready and wake up Ailahwolf..XD Have a great day! Ending music: Scared, Three Days Grace

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Friday, May 27, 2005

   Graduating!!!

Mood: Excited, Tired...-Yawn.- Music: Some Say, Sum41 Meh yesterdays practice was just horrible. We had to sit there for over an hour and a half waiting for people to show up so that we could practice..x.x Oh well, because today is the day that I graduate from HCHS Yayness!!! I can't wait, it starts at 7:30, so I have a little while to go. Lol, every girl has like the same dressy sandals that they're wearing to graduation, it's pretty funny..^^! Sum 41 Lyrics Well that's all I have to put for now, I'll try to comment on sites, but there's a likely chance I wont get to them, sorries..^^; Have a great day! Ending music: Born Like This, Three Days Grace

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Thursday, May 26, 2005

   Baccalaureate

Mood: Sleepy, Anxious, ?Sad? Music: New American Classic, Taking Back Sunday Yesterdays practice went better, we had twenty people in a truck took a picture and was allowed to go home..^^! Just think tomorrow is the day that I will be a graduate. I can't wait, but I can...Because I know I'm going to miss all of my friends, even if I know I'll still see some of them whenever. We had our Baccalaureate service lastnight and I will never regret going, it was so touching and sad. Everyone was crying even the boys, teachers, counselors, the choir, I even cried. When you go, you realize that you'll remember everyone in you class no matter how big it is, (There are 231 graduating in my class out of 233.) That's just all about what I wanted to say for now. "New American Classic" "We've got to get better," I said, "It's all in your head." We could live through these letters or forget it all together See the months they don't matter it's the days I can't take When the hours move to minutes and I'm seconds away Just ask the question come untie the knot Say you won't care, say you won't care Retrace the steps as if we forgot Say you won't care, say you won't care Try to avoid it but there's not a doubt And there's one thing I can do nothing about When all that we need is just a reaction It's too much to ask for when there's no attraction anymore If chasing our dreams is just a distraction I want to remember when I know that I can't go back Just ask the question come untie the knot Say you won't care, say you won't care Retrace the steps as if we forgot Say you won't care, say you won't care Try to avoid it (try to avoid it) but there's not a doubt There's one thing I can do nothing There's one thing I can do nothing There's one thing I can do nothing about. Just ask the question (just ask the question) come untie the knot Say you won't care, say you won't care Retrace the steps (retrace the steps) as if we forgot Say you won't care, say you won't care Try to avoid it (try to avoid it) but there's not a doubt And there's one thing I can do nothing There's one thing I can do nothing There's one thing I can do nothing about. I've been trying to comment on sites, and the most that I get to is the like the top first ones, but I try my best to get to all of your alls sites. Have a great day! End music: I'm The One, Seether

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Wednesday, May 25, 2005

   Immature male seniors..x.x

Mood: Oddly still tired, but questionable Music: Razorblades, Story of the Year To answer Conneryalexis's question in her comment the lyrics are whatever the song I have playing up top in 'Music' ^^! Well yesterday went...well it was yesterday...-.- I really don't think I did that well on my final at all considering I didn't get to study as much like I wanted to. We also had graduation practice and that was just horrible. No offense men, but when do you learn to mature? Most, (most because I know a few guys that aren't retarted.) of the senior guys at my school were the ones making it horrible we had one that left right during practice and came back trying to leave early. Then the guys were going, 'Ehy.' All of them sounded like they should join the retard chorus...x.x If they do that again, I know that our graduation cordinator going to go off on them or either the females are going to shove socks down their throats. Meh, and all they do is complain on how they want to leave and hurry and get out of the school, (We're allowed to go home after practice.) but it would go faster if they're not going, "Ehhhyyrr, 'Look at us we're retarted.' " Meh, sorry if I offend any guys out there, but it's not that mature or cute, so grow up..e.e; Well enough of that, here is the lyrics for 'Razorblades'. "Razorblades" Yeah, Yeah Walking example of you Wait for the silence Talking backwards to you It meant nothing to me Watching the world fall on you I'm keeping my eyes closed Now I can see what this means to you It meant nothing to me [Chorus] This wasted so many nights and again I've wasted so much time on a friend Too young, too proud to understand So this is the end Perfect timing for you You'll run 'til your legs break So here's my reminder of you It meant nothing to me [Chorus] This wasted so many nights and again I've wasted so much time on a friend Too young, too proud to understand So this is the end...GO! We should've seen this coming We should've seen this... YEAH! YEAH! [Chorus x2] This wasted so many nights and again I've wasted so much time on a friend Too young, too proud to understand So this is the end YEAH! This is the END! Only two more days and I'll be graduate..^^ I can't wait, and I know I'll cry because I already have, but it's alright to cry because I know I'll miss my friends. Have a great day!! Ending Music: Bottom of a Bottle, Smile Empty Soul

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Tuesday, May 24, 2005

   Awards and cramming..z.z

Mood: Tired, nervous, cramming Music: My Immortal, Evanescence Ahhhhh!!! I have my A.P. Calculus Exam today and I so did not get to study...v.v; The thing is that we had awards night last night and I had to be there to accept my awards. When I got home I (was) going to study for my exam in there, but we didn't get home until 10:00 something and by this time I'm extremely tired. I fell asleep while I was studying and I haven't even gone through half of the Outline Review, so now here I am, trying to cram more Math into my head...v.v I'm so tired of being here Suppressed by all my childish fears And if you have to leave I wish that you would just leave 'Cause your presence still lingers here And it won't leave me alone These wounds won't seem to heal This pain is just too real There's just too much that time cannot erase [Chorus:] When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears And I held your hand through all of these years But you still have All of me You used to captivate me By your resonating light Now I'm bound by the life you left behind Your face it haunts My once pleasant dreams Your voice it chased away All the sanity in me These wounds won't seem to heal This pain is just too real There's just too much that time cannot erase [Chorus] I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone But though you're still with me I've been alone all along [Chorus] Now back to cramming for this test, oh tomorrow I'll tell you what my awards were. Wish me luck I sure need it.' Have a great day! End Music: American Idiot, Green Day

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Monday, May 23, 2005

   Changes

Mood: Working hard, tired, getting ready for bed..e.e; Music: Number Five With a Bullet, Taking Back Sunday Hiya peeps! Shopping was BORING! My niece was a little brat like alawys..x.x Man it was just horrible how she was acting, crying, carrying on. She even stole a pair of sunglasses..v.v My sister and I didn't know until we looked through my sisters purse. Oh my neice is 22 months old, somewhere around there. She's almost to those terrible twos. Oh wells...>->; I got my dress that I'm going to wear under my gown. My gown is white so it's hard to find something to wear, so I ended up to having pick out a colour I don't really like .... I'ts PINK! Ahhh, it's evil..x.x; But it's cute, that's just the thing...O.o; Well other than that, nothing to really post so here's them lyrics. we're gonna die like this you know miserable and old really gotta hand it to you really gotta hand it to you are you positive absolutely sure well just get dressed, don't do this just get dressed, don't do this spend the night lit listening to miles davis you said it makes you want to fall in love or be smart enough to keep your distance you can't decide, you can't decide we're gonna die like this you know miserable and old really gotta hand it to you really gotta hand it to you (well just so you know) are you positive (when we get home) absolutely sure (we're through) well just get dressed, don't do this (we're through) just get dressed, don't do this it's a long way back south (to where i belong) well you've been there once or twice (and you still don't like it) i say you just never gave it a chance (well give me a chance, give me a chance) besides did you ever stop to think that we could keep this up living like theives (but you can't decide) you can't decide (no you can't decide) well you can't decide we're gonna die like this you know (we're gonna die like this) miserable and old (miserable and old) really gotta hand it to you (miserable and old) really gotta hand it to you (well just so you know) are you positive (when we get home) absolutely sure (we're through) well just get dressed, don't do this (we're through) just get dressed, don't do this are you positive, absolutely sure are you positive we're gonna die like this you know miserable and old really gotta hand it to you really gotta hand it to you well just so you know (we're gonna die like this you know) when we get home (miserable and old) we're through (really gotta hand it to you) we're through (really gotta hand it to you) just so you know (are you positive) when we get home (aboslutely sure) we're through (just get dressed don't do this) we're through (just get dressed don't do this) well just so you know (we're gonna die like this you know) when we get home (miserable and old) we're through (we'regonna die like this, miserable and old) we're through (miserable and old) well just so you know (we're gonna die like this you know) when we get home (miserable and old) we're through (we're gonna die like this, miserable and old) we're through Oh and I changed a few things on my site, I hope you guys like it, I'm still pondering onto change the background or not, but I'm keeping the same theme...^^ I think Tiny Snow Fairy Sugar is sooo cute. Well catch ya later, and sorry for not commenting on sites, I was pretty busy. Have a great day! End Music: Let You Down, Three Days Grace

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