Monday, April 23, 2007

I am horribly depressed today...
I had a dream last night that made me cry. Danni came to my 18th birthday party as plannned, except he had a redhead named Jen with him. When I asled him about it, he started screaming at me that I was a dumb ass for ever believing her would wait for me for a year and a half. Then he said i was fucking stupid and that he never really loved me at all. So I woke up and cried my poor little eyes out. So today I am trying to get in touch with Sammy to see what's been going on with the group, only im being ignored and her phone is on too. It makes me extremely angry to be ignored by the people I love and trust. I just dont get how he expects me to forget about him like he was never my lurver. Like im not going to worry and wonder what he's been up to, if he's happy or anything else. I just hope he hasn't totally stopped thinking about me. Or that he's actually moved on and found another girl to be his lover. I doubt he has, but my dreams almost never lie when it comes to him. And I keep waking up at three thirty in the morning because of his nightmares. I am jelous of every person who has ever hugged you, because for that moment, they held my entire world in their arms.
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