Wednesday, October 10, 2007

ALLRIGHT GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!! COMMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

my new site is completed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! allright..... MemoriesInTheRain that is the new site!!!! i'm still deciding weither or not i'm going to delete this one or not.... BUT.... maybe i won't..... you'll have to decide!!!!! O.o it's kinda scary that i'm leaving it up to you guys isn't it? O.o; i mean.... COME ON!!! you guys don't comment very much... -__- half of you don't even visit regularly.... it's kinda bothering me.... i mean... if i consider you friends.... DON'T FRIENDS VISIT EACHOTHER? O.o i mean.... Geez.... T__T i feel lonely.... i mean i know most of you are busy... BUT... i stop by you guy's sites when ever possible... AND I EVEN COMMENT ON THE POSTS FROM THE DAY BEFORE IF I WASN'T ON!!!! I MEAN GIVE ME SOME CREDIT..... *sigh* well.......... LET ME KNOW ALLRIGHT? AND YOU GUYS MUST COMMENT ON THIS OR I'LL MAKE KIRA WRITE YOUR NAMES IN HIS DEATH BOOK. It's that simple really.... i mean i'm helping him get rid of the evil people that don't comment on a lonely girl's site. NO WONDER I'M GOING INSANE... -__- if you guys commented more often maybe i would want to stay in this reality and not day dream to some made up world i know doesn't exist and never will be... O.o holy crap i'm scaring myself... O___O and that's not always a good thing... IT MUST BE THE COLD MEDICINE AGAIN!!! THAT'S IT!!! and the other people that bother me are the ones that read only the very few lines of a post and then read what other people have writen to let them know what's going on... -___- well i have to go... BUT LET ME KNOW!!!

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Oh!! I FORGOT!!!

the answer to the story problem for which only maybe one or two of you tried to guess if the main character's gender was... IT'S A GIRL!! ^^ actually in a funky version it's me. I'll put more of it on here if any of you's want to read more ^^ LET ME KNOW!! **Dark-San** ~TRYING TO FIND SOMEONE I CAN LOVE~

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ELLO GUYS!!! COMMENT!!!!!! :D

Icon of the day: ^^ haha i love invader zim... ANYWHO!!!! allright... i'm making a new site as we speak!! O.o i know it's scary right? :D anywho... i'll let you all know when it's done so you can come find me! ^^ or i'll find you, tell you who i am, and then you must come find me!! ^^ i'm INSANE!!! ^^ YAY!!! O.o THAT DUDE SERIOUSLY LOOKS LIKE L... O_o it's kinda scary... anyway.............. i'm kinda in an odd mood right now.... i stayed home from school AGAIN!!! >_< egh... CURSE THIS COLD!!! and so i'm kinda loopy because of the cold medicine... >_< (just about all cold medicines do this to me... i have no freaking idea why!) SEE!!! even L's looking at me strange!! O.o!! well, i'm gonna go work on my other site now! ^^ YAY!!! **Dark-San** ~TRYING TO FIND SOMEONE I CAN LOVE~

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Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Oi everyone! COMMENT!! ^^ please

Icon of the day: WELL..... >_< today i'm sick... stayed home from school... T____T Believe it or not... i hate being sick... and i don't like staying home rom school because then i miss EVERYTHING!!! >_< egh... *cough* i keep losing my voice... which really sucks... so thank God i kinda have the computer... but lately it hasn't liked me... if i try watching vids or something on here they freeze and stuff... but i don't wanna restart the computer because my mom's stuff for her college classes are still open!! O.o and i don't wanna screw them up or something... Um.... OH!!! I HAVE 100 SIGNING'S IN MY DEATHBOOK!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!! ^________^ i feel all happy and tingly inside! :3 hee hee... ANYWHO........................ i'm gonna find something for breakfast ^^ so... i shall see you guys around!! :D Oh... and here are some poems and stuffage!! XD haha stuffage is a funny word... ^^; The cool rain Falls down onto My hot face. I feel my skin Begin to steam. But it's not steam That i feel. It's the crying Of the sky That seems so real. But it's only me Tears streaming Down my lonely face. It's me that's crying While looking at Your beautiful face. And uh... here's a part from a new story ^^ i swear i have too much free time on my hands... i walked into Mount Freedman High a complete nervous wreck. it was my first day as a tenth grader there. i had just moved to Seattle over the summer from someplace in New York, so i felt kind of out of place, as maybe you could tell. I was allready getting strange looks from other kids, as i adjusted my messenger bag from one shoulder to the other. it was black with skulls on it. i had on a gray shirt with a black invader zim hoodie sweatshirt with one of the characters, Gir, on the front saying: "i love tacos". it's my favorite. I looked at the wall to find out which homeroom was mine. i had to brush my lond black bangs out of my face so i could see. i found my name, looked over, and put my finger on the number. i was on the third floor. i turned around and made my way to the area where i had thought i had seen stairs when i had walked in. Some random girl came up to me and pointed at my converses. "I like your shoes," she said, a wide smile on her face. i looked down, my skinny jeans just covered the tops of my high top converses. They were old, ratty, falling apart, and full of writing from my friends back home. "Uh... thanks?" i managed to squeak out of my mouth. My voice wasn't working right. I stared at the girl, examining her face. She was a girly girl. I could tell by just one look at her. Her blonde hair gleamed under the floresent lighting. Her blue eyes sparkled like shapires. Her mouth fit her round face perfectly. She looked as if she was an angel or something. "I like your hair, too," she said, " i like the blue and red streak in the black." She pointed to my hair. I pulled on it, "thanks," i replied feeling awkward. She nodded and began to walk away. "Um, where are the stairs?" i asked her as she got a little farther away. a couple people gave me odd looks, as if i was an alien from outer space. She turned torwards me and smiled. "it's down that hallway, and make a right at the cafeteria," she answered me, " you can't miss it." I nodded and headed in that direction. WELL.... CAN YOU GUESS IF THE MAIN CHARACTER IS A GUY OR A GIRL? ^^ let me know if you think you know the answer!! :D And by the way... to Sasuke fan 4 life's question a few days back: why yes, ^^ all of the poems i put on here are my originals... **Dark-San** ~TRYING TO FIND SOMEONE I CAN LOVE~

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Monday, October 8, 2007

Um... here. PLEASE COMMENT!!!! ^^

Icon of the day: 1.Can you cook? 2.What was your dream growing up? 3.What talent do you wish you had? 4.If I bought you a drink what would it be? 5.Favorite vegetable? 6.What was the last book you read? 7.What zodiac sign are you? 8.Any Tattoos and/or Piercings? 9.Worst Habit? 10.If you saw me walking down the street would you offer me a ride? 11.What is your favorite sport? 12.Negative or Optimistic attitude? 13.What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me? 14.Worst thing to ever happen to you? 15.Tell me one weird fact about you 16.Do you have any pets? 17.What if i showed up at your house unexpectedly? 18.What was your first impression of me? 19.Do you think clowns are cute or scary? 20.If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be??? 21.Would you be my crime partner or my conscience? 22.What color eyes do you have? 23.Ever been arrested? 24.Bottle or Draft? 25.If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it? 26.Would you date me? 27.What 's your favorite place to hang at? 28.Do you believe in ghosts? 29.Favorite thing to do in your spare time? 30.Do you swear a lot? 31.Biggest pet peeve? 32.In one word, how would you describe yourself? 33.Do you believe/appreciate romance? 34.If you could spend 12 hours with me and ask/do anything you like, what would it be? 35.Do you believe in God? 36.What is your favorite flower? 37.Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same? i don't really have anything to say today... so... yeah.... **Dark-San** ~TRYING TO FIND SOMEONE I CAN LOVE~

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Sunday, October 7, 2007

   why ello everyone!! COMMENT!!!

Icon of the day: Ello!! ^^ like my site? i changed it up a bit! ^^ i was bored... and now i'm bored again... :D i'm having guy troubles... like always... i can't get this one kids face out of my freaking head. it's really pissing me off... *sigh* i don't wanna tell him i like him becasue i just met him like a month ago... and it usually makes things awkward anyways... :P egh... KAWAII PICTURE!! :3 anywho..... XD sorry... i'll stop with the pictures... :D (i have been a pervert lately though... the guy i like keeps wearing these leather pants... O.o i'll stop...) i'm working on more poems!! i'll post them again soon! ^^ i really need to pay attention in class more... :D i keep writing them during classes and not really paying attention to the teachers... :D hmm.... what else... OH!!! i'm getting a PS2 and i'm getting some kingdom hearts games!!!!! :3 ^^ yes i'm obsessing about a PS2... i've never had one. i've got a game cube... (only because i wanted Lengend of Zelda games... XD ) i'm also getting the new Zelda game for DS!!! ^^ AWSOMENESS!!!!! :3 i really never get this much stuff... (my birthday's coming up soon ^^) i usually only get one or two things and a couple cards!! THIS IS AWSOME!!!! i watched the movie "The Crow" with Brandon Lee in it last night... :3 i now know what i'm gonna be for halloween!! ^^ i'm gonna get a shirt that says : "The Crow" on it and then paint my face like his is in the movie... :D IT'S GONNA BE AWSOME!!! (and yes i am a soon to be 15 year old that loves to go trick or treating and loves Halloween!!) well.... i dunno.... please comment on my abnormal randomness!! ^^ **Dark-San** ~TRYING TO FIND SOMEONE I CAN LOVE~

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Saturday, October 6, 2007

uh..... COMMENT ^^

Icon of the day: haha... my name! ^^ i want to say that i'm sorry for that last post..... uh... i was kinda in a really... funky mood. i'm really sorry... but thank you to Metal Dragon and Mangnus for their support... ^^ sorry.... um... here are some poems! Falling down, I'm all alone. This smile is just for show. Crying, Hurt, But never shown. Head bangging to the beat, Jump around on you feet. Stretch your hands to the sky, Lose yourself and don't wonder why. Music, Singing to my heart. Losing myself, From the start. I put the headphones on, And away i go. Music is my life And that's how it goes. And a song i wrote: V1 (fast beat) School sucks All alone Never fit in Always told Failure Hurt Just for show Listen to the radio Ch: (slower beat) Why does it Have to be so Strange here? Why can't it be like it was before? I feel so out Of place here Nothing like it Was before V2 (fast beat) Romeo Heartattack Dying now Watch your back Fall down Laugh attaack Always hurt Never comin' back Ch (slow beat) Oooohhh, crying now <- whole thing soft 1st time Oooohhh, dying now. <- this line loud 2nd time (repeat) Ch well... um... yeah. Please comment! ^^ **Dark-San** ~TRYING TO FIND SOMEONE I CAN LOVE~

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*yawn* COMMENT......

Icon of the day: Well... right now i really shouldn't be on here... It's about 12:20 in the morning... :D Homecoming sucked ass... -__-* But, we did win 7 to 0 at the football game! ^^ That was the only good thing about tonight... er... today... >_< The dance afterwards was the worst... -__- *sighs* and it's completely obiouvs that the guy i like really doesn't like me... and vow never to speak him name.... because... it just fxxxs everything up in a friendship. But i don't even know if you can call it a friendship!!! >_< i just kinda tag along with them becasue i don't know anyone!!!! ARGH!!!! -__- So i'm in a really shitty mood. I feel hopeless, worthless, invisable, and pretty damn fxxxed up. My mom said she's gonna get me "help"! She didn't even try to say theripist or something... you know, you'd think she'd try to be nice about it but... NO. She's like: "i think i'll try to find you some help. someone you can talk to." at the same time i'm thinking: "what the hell is wrong with me!?!" But tonight i sort of realized it... I drag the other people that i'm with down along with myself. i've been staying away from most people. i REALLY REALLY hate large groups of people. I'd rather sit by myself and watch others hang out with their friends instead of being with my own. I SERIOUSLY can't dance. I have problems with other people. i HATE people. I don't want to live. i'm sick of everything. i WANT to hurt myself so i can feel something besides this hurt inside my chest. i REALLY REALLY want the boy i like to be my boyfriend. i'm only living so that my mom won't be alone. I care too damn much for my own good. NO ONE likes me. i HATE myself. i think i'm TOO fat to be loved. (i hate all you damned skinny mini's who think you're all so damn hot just because you can see your own damn hip bones. you mother-fers... i hate you all) i feel like i CAN'T be LOVED because i'm fairly over-weight. I want to JUMP off a bridge. SO AS YOU CAN TELL I'M CLEARLY FxxxED UP... AND I NEED TO SEE SOMEONE SO I CAN TALK ABOUT MY DAMN PROBLEMS... AND I WANT SOMEONE TO LOVE ME BESIDES MY MOM... I DON'T CARE IF I LIVE ANYMORE. I NEED HELP... i tried cutting myself the other day. mom hasn't noticed yet... no one's noticed yet. I'm invisable and no one cares... Maybe you guys can cheer me up somehow... but i seriously doubt it... i should get to bed. i need sleep. But i CAN'T sleep. i haven't been able to in about a year and a half now... and i swear if my kitten cries for me one more time.... -___-***** i can't stand anything right now. i'm hurt terribly. I want to slow dance with a boy. i wanna feel loved by a boy. i wanna be kissed by an boy. i want to hold hands with a boy. i want to be held by a boy. I WANT TO FEEL LOVED BY A BOY. my mom says that's only because i don't have my dad in my life... i don't care about that jackass bastard that means nothing to me but that fact that he's a sperm doner for my life. this pathchtic life that means nothing to anyone else. well... this is getting extremly long... an i know you guys don't want to be dragged down any further into a depressed mood... because i tend to do that to people i guess. so.... yeah. By the way. i'll have more poems up soon. i know you guys all "LOVE" to read them... -__- *sigh* **Dark-San** ~TRYING TO FIND SOMEONE I CAN LOVE~

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Wednesday, October 3, 2007

   Hey guys! Please Comment!! ^^

Icon of the day: Ello! i just can't stay away from here for very long... -__-' Wow... i'm pathetic. *sighs* well... i'm tired. Really tired and i would like to eat like 3000 packs of sugars right now. Just like the icon above... ^^ uh... i've not really been having a good time lately... -__- i've been kinda not myself these past few days... >_< my dad is being... well... allright since basically all of you don't know the story i shall tell you. Feel loved about this... i don't really tell people. okay... when i was little... my parents got a divorce. (and i mean i was really little and barely remember anything.) So... well, what happened was is that my dad took me from my mom and we when to live with my grandma. now my grandma on my dad's side is a bitch. (and i'm serious about this. when i talked to her the other day she didn't even say i love you when we got off the phone with each other.) now, well my grandma wouldn't let my mom inside the house so she could see me and it was like that for two years and finally she got me back. >_< well, my dad never really got over it but it was his fault to begin with... so i don't really understand him. BUT... anyways... after a couple years (when i was about 7) my dad stopped coming to get me every other weekend and soon stopped coming to get me at all. he moved to albany Ny which is about 8 hrs. from here and i barely ever see him. and now he blames me for just about everything and he does the same to my mom. anyways now he won't pay the child support and we don't have that much money or anything and we're basically living off those checks!!! ARGH!!!!! >_< anyways..... you probably don't want me to go on and on about that so i'll stop. So... lately my dad's being an ass. I'm having mental metldowns on a daily basis because i swear i have issues or something... and i've been feeling like i'm worth nothing and totaly useless to everyone around me. i've been having problems with school. no one really talks to me because i'm new and the couple kids i have made friends with don't... i dunno... they seem like they don't care about me at all. So i feel shity and messed up. on a happier note (i guess) i wrote some more poems for you guys. that's really what i wanted you guys to comment on and stuff but i went off on a raging tangent... -__- i've been doing that a lot lately. well then..... here they are.... i have so much time in class to write these... :D Love is Suicide, Want to know why? Because it blinds your eyes! You don't see They're hurting you, Until the very end. And then it's too late, You've allready opened up the gate. The gate that will Soon lead to your hate. People call me strange, But how can you lable me, When you're all the same? Skeleton hiding in my closet, How scary you're still haunting me. What have i done to desreve all of this? Are you still upset that i Ended up killing you in the end? Faeries hiding in the forest, Faeries hiding behind The trees. Faeries give me some Magic please. I want to become As small as you so that I may twirl on the petals Of the flowers that mean death. Sweet painless death, How swift you come to me. You come so fast, I could hardly see! Floating in the air, Suspended from the ground, I watch as the world goes round. No on notices how far i an away, But the again, No one cares anyway. Kill me, Kiss me, Love always Develops from The dark. Looking though the glass, Trying to find who i am. Wondering how much time has passed, Sitting all alone inside This dying head. The stars twinkling around the Bright pale full moon, Look so alive up in the dark sky. They dance and pretend Nothing's wrong with the world. He said: "You mean nothing to me." And i asked: "why?" He rolled his eyes And looked up at the sky. "We were never anything, You and I." The world is scary. Everything that was Important to me, Was taken from me. It's insane, That i would even Think you were Something to me. But who am i fooling? No one, That's who. I can't forget you, I love you again Far too soon. You make me so hot, I'm starting to sweat. I can't get this Feeling off my chest. I see you, I freeze. Yet i'm melting inside. But, really, Who am i? No one special, Just a girl you're Making melt inside. No one cares, I'm in that dark spot again. No worries, I'll just die, Alone again. Am i living? You truly think so? Well, Let's see on the inside. Nope, Nothing alive here. You didn't just hurt me, My dearest of all loves. No, You completely DESTROYED ME. How does that make you feel? But wait, You feel nothing. Not love or hate. Dearest of all loves, Oh how you make me fly. I fly the highest In these skies. But, it's only When i sit next to you. If you're gone, I'm gone as well. For my brain comtinues To search for you Inside these painfull MEMORIES. Crushed and Broken, But life goes on. Why is it that The light isn't on? No one cares, No one's there, And i'm too close To floating in the air. Why should i dare To give a care? No one's there, Why should i care? But i do care, Because i'm all alone. Standing along the cliff's edge, Staring down at the sea, Hoping to see you, Looking out for me. I get really to jump, My arms spread out wide. Suddenly i feel arms Wrappend around my sides. I look back, It's you that i see. Oh how i love you, You're allways there for me. You were there, And now you're gone. Why is it allways this way? I find someone i love, And then... They just go away. "The sword i'm holding Will always protect you," You once said to me. But then if that Is so true... Why is it now Going threw me? I carved out my Slow beating heart And gave it to you. You promised you would Keep it safe for me. But why are the Promises always broken? Because now you're Stabbing it to get back at me. Am i such a pain That i mean nothing to you? You've got no room In your heart to care? If that's so, Screw this life. I'll go where i'm wanted. When i leave, I don't go far. When you go, You go so far. There's always a difference In our hearts. Broken, Hurt, Pain, This is all that i hate. But what i hate is part of me, And this is what I'll always be. And my favorite one!! : School sucks, All alone. Never fit in, Always told. Failure, Hurt. Just for show, Sing to that radio. Holy shitcakes batman... THAT WAS LONG!!! >_< i'm sorry about such a long post! BUT PLEASE COMMENT!!! ^___^ **Dark-San** ~TRYING TO FIND SOMEONE I CAN LOVE~

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Tuesday, October 2, 2007

ELLO! FOLKIES!!!

ICON OF THE DAY: well.... todays a short post. i'll put more poems on here again in a bit. i'll be buzy with school and things so i won't be able to post for a while. sorry to all my fans... :D i'm having emotional problems and things lately so i won't be posting as much.... sorry. love that pic! don't you? :D well... i'll see you all later on! but still feel free to PM me and stuff.... i'll check that ^^

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