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myOtaku.com: neko courtney
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Welcome to my site archives. 10 posts are listed per page.
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Wednesday, March 3, 2004
 :(:(:(:(:(
Fuck!!! I'm so sick and tired of being walked all over! I can't fucking take it anymore! Why doesn't anyone have respect for me? It's like no one even hears me when I talk. Richard won't even talk to me anymore and I didn't even do anything... he's already going after a new girl, and it hasn't even been a week yet... *sigh* I asked him if I could call him tonight and he just said "Well no, I'm probably just going to hang up on you." I just don't understand; he talks to me all art class, and never shuts up, but when it comes to his friends he won't even look at me. He doesn't even tell me anything... like, he just dropped his Math class, and he didn't even tell me. Usually, while we were dating, we'd always walk together to 3rd, now when I walk with him it's like he speeds up to walk faster... I have to pretty much run behind him.
I hate to sound like a whiny bitch, but I fucking hate myself. Every relationship I've ever had has been the same. I end up chasing after the guy until he tells me to just fuck off. I get so attatched to people... I just can't help it. I don't understand how Richard can already be over me. I mean, we went out for 3 months, and then it's just over, and he's already going after another girl. He also told me that he'd stay with me through this whole thing, now he won't even call me. I wish I had someone to talk to...
So to make everything worse, my dad is moving away. I love my dad so much, he helps me through all of my hard times. I don't know what I'm going to do when he's gone... he's moving to the town his girlfriend lives in. It really hurts... it's like he's replacing Chelsey and I with his girlfriend's kids... I'm really sick of all of this. Everything is falling apart for me, I can't take this anymore. Little things are starting to bug me, like today Nigel called me dumb (jokingly, it's just the way he is) because I didn't understand our biology assignment. I freaked at him. I just can't handle anything anymore. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't do my homework, I just can't do anything.
*Sigh* I wish I could fall asleep for 3 months and wake up when everything goes away.
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*crying*
I don't know what I did, but Richard dumped me. It came out of no where; I thought our relationship was getting better; it seemed better than ever, but then he just dumped me. Christ, it hurts so much. He told me he still wants to date me, but he wants to date other people. I wish he could make up his mind, because I'm kind of just hanging around, waiting for him to come back. I seem to have this realistic idea that we're still together, and it just won't go away. We fight every day, because I'm too unstable to handle this break up, and he's too selfish to understand what I'm going through and why I'm hurt... I wish it would just all go away. I don't want this anymore. I didn't do anything to deserve this... I just wish he would talk to me...
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Friday, February 20, 2004
 Art
I haven't submitted anything for a long time. I've been working on some CCS pictures, but they're taking a while. I'm much better at drawing with a computer than I am by hand. I'd like to color some of my drawings with pencil crayon for once, I never get around to it though. I'm always afraid of ruining my drawing. Meh. Oh well.
I'm going for dinner with Richard in a couple hours, I should get ready. ~_^ Hehe.
Ummmmmm yeah that's it.
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Monday, February 16, 2004
Plagarism
So I've been seeing so much plagarism on TheOtaku, lately. I don't know if TheOtaku allows edited pictures, or if they actually have to be drawn by you, but someone on TheOtaku has been using a line effect on original drawings. I don't want to embarass anyone, so I won't name names. Either way, I don't think it is right that people use Glowing Edge effects on original drawings, then submit them. Infact, I know exactly how this person makes these drawings, but I won't say how or who it is. (That's just how nice I am ^__^) Anyways, I hope this plagarism stops soon, I've been seeing just too much of it lately.
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Sunday, February 8, 2004
 Wow
Holy crap! I'm going to California this summer! Life has been so fu... great lately. We're going for mine and Chelsey's 16th birthday, (yeah, we're twins) and Jen's 30th. (Jen's my half sister). Yay, Disneyland. :D
Anyways
Richard and I broke up for a few days, but we really missed eachother... we're back together now. Breaking up made me realize how much he means to me... he means more to me now than he ever has. I stayed at his house last night... he told me that if we were old enough, and finished school and colledge, he would propose to me. Wow. :) And it's Valentines day soon. I've never actually had a boyfriend on Valentines day.
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Sailor Neptune. Like Sailor Uranus you always seem
to be very calm and collected. You're very
girlish but in a good way and always seem to be
around sailor uranus 0.0 Your powers are based
upon water
The Ultim8 Sailor Moon quiz: Which sailor senshi (soldier) R U?
brought to you by Quizilla
Sailor Moon. You all care about each other very
much and would do anything for each other.
Although there is the occasional argument
between two of you, you always find a way to
work it out.
Which anime group do you and your friends resemble?
brought to you by Quizilla
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Tuesday, January 27, 2004
I <3 Richard. It's our two month today... making it my longest relationship yet. I hope it lasts a long time... :)
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Thursday, December 18, 2003
 Sooo bored...
Blah. I'm at school right now. It's first period, so I have a spare. And I had to walk here, and I have no idea how long it usually takes me to walk places so I ended up being about half an hour early.
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Friday, November 28, 2003
 Yay
Yayyyy I have a boyfriend. I asked him out two days ago. Oh god that was so hard. I've never asked anyone out before. His name's Richard... and yeah. I don't know what else to say. But anyways, yay :)
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Friday, November 21, 2003
 Bub bub bub
I saw Darrell at school. It was quite scary, thankfully nothing happened. I'm surprised he didn't say anything to me.
Meh.
I got in a huge fight with Dad today... right in the middle of the mall. I just mentioned that he's been acting really immature lately and he blew up at me. It just seems like I can't ever do anything right. *sigh*
I bought Melissa her birthday presents today. I hope she likes them. I got her 3 nose rings and a touque. (Is that how it's spelled? I'm Canadian, I should know this.) Her party-dealy should be fun.
Chelsey and I saw these girls, Raney and Meagan, that we met at the AFI concert. Chelsey knew Meagan online before the concert though. It was kind of weird, seeing that they're from Melfort and Chelsey seems to see them everywhere. They're both really nice. Meagan is really quiet though, kind of like me.
After that, my mom came to the mall (my dad had left by then) and bought me underwear. That was kinda cool. Then we went to Winners and she bought me a new winter jacket. That was really cool. Then her, her boyfriend, Chelsey, Justin (Chelsey's boyfriend) and I all went for supper. It was okay, but Mom's boyfriend is really annoying.
Yeah. My day.
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 Not true. Not true at all.
Pink! Your eyes are pink! You're probably really
cute, and you like men a lot! To you, they're
mere toys and it's fun to play with them! You
probably enjoy painting your nails in bright
colors, too!
What Color Are Your Anime Eyes?
brought to you by Quizilla
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