Thursday, September 27, 2007

Some times
Nana got this idea when she had heard that Jungy and Kelsey were tieing the knot. Now Nana knows that it was a joke but she couldn't help herself and has started to write a wedding, MyOtaku style.

***

*Cue “Tough Love” by KISS*
*Cue Montage of successful and failed wedding ceremonies*
*Camera pans around church and planes into our two hosts*

Chad: Welcome to the newest Celebrity Weddings. I’m your host, Chad Bikman. Today’s show is taking a look at the wedding of two famous Otakus.

Bob: I’m Chad’s co-host, Bob…. Wait, what’s my last name? I had one last time.

Chad: Do you remember what happened last time?

Bob: I don’t think they ever issued a warrant.

Chad: They didn’t need to.

Bob: Right… *sigh*

Chad: Anyway, we are currently in front of the Los Angeles Convention Center, home to Anime Expo. Because this is a special event, tickets were sold. As with most weddings of this nature, there are a few weirdoes in the bunch. *Camera pans over to a guy who is dressed as Sailor Moon* Ah, yes, the delusional states some of these people fall into.

Bob: My question is, why Sailor Moon? I mean there are much better magical girls these days. More moe and everything.

Chad: That’s why I said delusional.*Pauses* Bob?

Bob: What?

Chad: We’re not going to have a repeat of New York, are we?

Bob: What, when I *Chad nods* I’ll do my best to hold my urges.

Chad: Good. *motions the camera to follow* The wedding will be held in the south hall and the after party will span most of the building. From what the director tells me, it will play out much like a one day convention after the wedding. *Enters South Hall* Just look at that lighting. In place of the pews we have our standard convention goer folding chair. The props department build the stage where we have a beautiful 18th century alter and a wonderfully non-white Jesus on the cross.

Bob: I thought the guy was supposed to be white.

Chad: How many Middle Easterns do you know that are white?

Bob: Osama

Chad: I rest my case. *Points to upper level* Since the expected turnout is expected to be on par with your average convention, the upper level has been fitted with two large plasma TVs that will give the live cast of the wedding. *Starts to walk to the alter* To the side of the stage we hale the organ. I don’t know who will be our player, but I expect lots.

Bob: Hey, there’s a large bowl of water here. *Moves to drink from it*

Chad: *Stops Bob* That’s holy water, and if you were looking when we walked in, there is another at the entrance.

Bob: *giggles* Christians are funny.

Chad: Sigh…. *Goes into back room* Excuse me? Reverend Nana?

R. Nana: *Turns to greet the hosts* Ah, I was told about this. So this is some kind of TV show people with no lives watch then?

Chad: *sweat drop* I wouldn’t say no lives.

R Nana: *Shrugs* Tomato, Tamato. So what can I do for you, lads? *looks at Bob, who is sniffing Nana’s robes* Is he okay?

Chad: Define “Okay”

R Nana: Ah.

Chad: I was wondering Reverend, how many of this type of wedding have you done before?

R Nana: This one will make my tenth. I got the idea from a friend of mine, Bishop Yatzey. We both are fans of anime and we were watching some show on those weird weddings that other geeks sometimes do.

Chad: Do you charge for your services?

R. Nana: No, the lord Jesus does. I ask for donations after the service. All donators get a free plushy.

Chad: Now, I was looking at the casting and found that the Bride’s Maid is also a Nana. Any relation?

R Nana: She’s my sister. Yeah I know she’s a Diclonious, but she’s quite timid… Most of the time… Just don’t show her any Loli-yuri.

Chad: *Looks at Bob, who is now fiddling with some rosaries quietly giggling to himself* I know your pain.

R Nana: Bless you. But you’re paid to deal with him, right?

Chad: Define paid.

R Nana: I’ll keep you in my prayers

Chad: God ain’t helping me. I burnt down a church by accident when I was young and blamed it on Bob.

R Nana: *cough* All will be forgiven in time.

Chad: Well, I think we should move on. *grabs Bob’s collar* See you at the ceremony. *Nana waves as Chad drags Bob out of the room.*

Bob: *Shakes out of Chad’s grip* That was so uncalled…. *His line of sight starts to follow a familiar figure* Thank god for Key and autism.

Chad: *Looks over and sees Makoto* Bob, what did we agree upon before we entered?

Bob: *sighs* I will not attack the lolis.

Chad: And what is Makoto?

Bob: A fox

Chad: *hits Bob in the back of the head* A loli-fox! No touchy!

Bob: *Rubs head* That is so not cool.

Chad: Live with it

*Commercial break*

Announcer: Ever find yourself tired for no reason? *Some random dude nods* Do you wish you had more pep? *Dud nods again* Then get your hand on some Ramen. Yes Ramen, eaten in animes and real Japanese towns all around. It gives Naruto power, The turtles gave up pizza for it, and the local wiseman won’t even talk to you without having a bowl first.
Side Street Ramen: It make you pimp!
*end commercial*
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