Tuesday, February 7, 2006

im... back... again... maybe for good this time? only time will tell i suppose
well alot has happened... alot... i mean a fucking shitload of hell has been let loose, hell spawn and sin spawn mating creating chaos and havoc and causing my life to go down the fucking drain.

aint life grand? >(^_^)¬ <-yes im actually quite proud of my creativity on that...>>...

well i dont really want to talk about most of it nor am i really allowed to talk about most of it. basically im really hating life right now, on of my friends is mad at me because he doesnt understand that when i say "i dont trust you" it means "I REALLY DONT BLOODY TRUST YOU!" its nothing personal. it really istn. i cant make you take it how its meant to be taken so ill say its not personal but if you take it personal...well... not my problem your the one who isnt listening... anyways i dont trust anyone really. you know the whole "i hate the world not nessissarily you just the world as a whole" thing. so ill be your friend but its going to take more then a couple months knowing you before i really begin to trust you. i mean hell especially if your a guy! ive said it before and ill say it again! im sexist against guys! i mean yeah people say "well your a guy" NO SHIT! i hate myself! havent you people gotten that?! i hate everything about me ESPECIALLY the fact that im male! all girls out there! guys are low life, perverted peices of shit who cant do a bleeding thing right and try to compensate for this in many ways none of which are productive or good for ANYONE! admitably! not all guys are like this! yes some are gay- sorry i had to. no some guys are nice but that doesnt make them trustworthy or anythign! do you not remember all the cases with the wonderful boyfriend who was nice, polite, loved by all, perfect guy, who also had a side job of murdering all the girls he would date! come on!

anyways moving on... just had my first judo class... goddess i should have drank some water today... i had like a sprite... all day that was my only drink.. then at 6:30 at night i go for an endurance judo class >.< everyone is seeing me for the first time and i looked like a fool as im about ready to hurl but wait! oh sorry! theres nothing in my stomach to do that with! bloody hell! the room was spinning! though i am proud of myself for pressing on even though it was stupid and none of you should ever do it! its dangerous for your body and bad for your health. *scolds self*.

id just like to point out that im not racist.

i hate everyone equally.

what else can i rant about because i know kelsey will be the only one to read this on my otaku and when i copy past this to vampire freaks meghan and rakuda are the only one who will read it there... goddess im so lonely... fucking hell on valentines day im going to listen to the MOST EMO MUSIC I CAN FIND! im going to make a list and if i remember ill put it up on here. definate song that will be on there is lonely day by system of a down off the new cd Hypnotize. if you havent listened to it then do so. if you dont want to because you dont like them as a band well you suck. if you dont like to because you dont like them because you dont like rock then you need to broaden your horizons. if you dont want to listen becasue you dont have the money then too bad pirate it not that i would ever do anything like that >>...<<....O.O!!! etc etc... i will be celebrating white day as part of the anime club that im treasurer of. basically i dont do anything on v-day. (not that i would anyways. DUH!) but i accept chocolate and stuff and then on march 14th, one month later i repay the debt to all the girls who gave me chocolate. now id like to point out that im only doing this to support my club and any out of club wanna-be-valentines will be responded to with a "get lost i will not be your valentine" is that mean? or is taking a beautiful holiday about love and turning it into a holiday about candy and false hope and shattered dreams a bit mean? is never recieving a true valentine mean? is resentment to the holder of the knife wedged into your back through your spine puncturing your lungs and rapturing (is that the right word?) your heart mean? ok lets make it a nice katana instead of a knife... happy? ok thank you. moving on.

well john seems to have gotten a bit of a grip and so thats one less problem but i still dont trust him fully.

wo what to talk about now... basically im bored so yes im going to rant. if you have a problem then WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU READING A BLOG! WTF DO YOU THINK PEOPLE DO ON BLOGS! THEY BLOODY WELL RANT! so what havent i ranted about that im GOING to rant about... fuck it i really dont care lets see if anyone even reads this besides who i already said...
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