Wednesday, March 17, 2004

Project Entry
It's easier for me to type than write, so I'm typing.

The special food I have to buy for this project is a good deal better than I expected, although it also costs a good deal more. I certainly got my money's worth from Mark Pi's though. So far it's not all that gut wrenching or mind breaking, trying to keep these austerities. And I have to wonder whether I just never tried to test my will before. I certainly thought I had a strong will before, but now I'm wondering if it is in fact somewhere near indomitable. It's a rarity that I need to enforce any sort of will in any matter, so I suppose I didn't really know the nature of it until now. I came ino this thinking tha tI would be drooling over every piece of meat and coke that went by, and that's just not the case at all. I said I would not do it, so I won't. If I waver on something, it's because I have no dedication to said thing in the first place. I know my intentions already, and indecision is perhaps just a result of entertaining the rest of society.

At some point I'm supposed to make a journal entry on something in my past that was painful. I have to wonder if it's supposed to be painful now or not, because I can't think of too much that really hurts me deeply nowadays. I get lonely, sad, yes, but hurt? No. I think I expect all outcomes in some way or another, so I'm prepared for them.

I suppose that incident with Sabrina hurt, but it was really the sort of..indignation that comes from obligation. I think that fits well enough. I expected some sort of communication between us that never came about. It was to me, a social obligation, I guess it's just taught me the relativity of such things, and that not everyone holds something like my code of conduct to their heart. I think next time around I'll have to discuss at length how I've evolved as a person in the past year or so. Time's up though, so I'm done.
Comments (0) | Permalink

Tuesday, March 16, 2004

   Hehe!
Beware! The Clan of Darkness stalks the night! Torturing poor defenseless AIM users by calling them poopy heads, and then warning them! *gasp*

Seriously, it's funny.
Comments (0) | Permalink

Thursday, March 11, 2004

   Spring Break..
More than halfway over and I didn't get to do what I intended to. I had meant to go see a church a bit north of here, and visit the cemetary of the town, but pops wouldn't let me go without some sort of company. Of course, my friend John ditched or forgot me in a marijuana induced stupor, and the other option developed Syncopy. I think that's how you spell it.. Can't exactly blame her for that, but you know.
Comments (0) | Permalink

Wednesday, March 3, 2004

Yeah..
I know that all of one person stumbles across this place every couple days, but nevertheless.

Anybody know if Black Hole Sun by Soundgarden is influenced by Paradise Lost, or at least Biblical references?
Comments (0) | Permalink

Tuesday, March 2, 2004

   Oh so close
To Spring Break. I can taste the sleep. ^^
Comments (0) | Permalink

Friday, February 27, 2004

   Had another messed up dream
I've pretty well forgotten how it started, but I know in the beginning I was driving. I drove for something like an hour, back country roads, pretty desolate. I wind up at this relatively large house. I think I knew from the beginning where I was going, although it has no correlation with reality. I was heading to my ex-girlfriends. So I walk onto the porch, and she opens the door. She's with a guy, I'm assuming her husband or boyfriend, and he looks like a dog. A dirty, but well meaning dog. She looks the same as always, I swear in real life she hasn't changed since we started going out. So we start talking, I don't really know why I'm there. I'm making friendly with the guy, and her, I guess, can't really remember. Then this column appears. The girl left, somewhere in this, and the column has something to do with her. It's not really a column, but it looks like one. It's like a joint in a wall, but I don't think it's actually a wall, either. It's a metallic green, and in the center is this..brain/heart..thing. It's just some organ, sort've. It starts to dry up, or get crushed, I'm leaning to the latter. I know this is connected to her. It stops being any sort of coherent dream after this. I remember being in some sort of white room, like an empty office building. And there are these organs floating around again. Heart, brain, lungs, I don't really know. They're different colors, and some have eyes. I think they start to die too, and the eyes fall off. They're like paper, because they just slide or float down from the organs they're attached to. After some stuff I can't remember, maybe back at the house, some of them come back to life, and one eye floats back up. That's all I can remember.
Comments (0) | Permalink

Wednesday, February 25, 2004

   SLAP!
I'm Rick James, bitch!

That is frickin' hilarious.
Comments (0) | Permalink

Sunday, February 22, 2004

   Not quite that worried or stressed..
Got a bit of a decision to make. There's a girl that I was with over the summer, don't know if I mentioned her...think I did, waaay back when I first joined.

Anyway, I saw her for the first time awhile ago. I've been totally lacking in the girl department, so I gave her my cell number and she gave me hers. She's doing a little too much of the party scene and such for my taste, but, being a guy, I still want to, well...yeah. So it's a battle of the two heads. Oh well.
Comments (0) | Permalink

Friday, February 20, 2004

   Got a song stuck in my head
If I see you're like your daddy and I should be gone, I would try to burn you but I won't.
If I think that loving you could be just like a drug, I would burn you but I won't.
If I think that you're the precious I've been searching for, I would try to burn you but I won't.
If I could burn you walk away not see you anymore, I would try to burn you.
I would try to burn you.
I would try to burn you but I won't.
Comments (1) | Permalink

Wednesday, February 18, 2004

   We need more moot emoticons
I'm rarely experiencing enough emotion to warrant most of the above emots. I'm thinking of cutting my hair. It's about five inches longer than in the picture I have posted. I think I'll cut it back to that length, maybe bleach or lighten it, and frost it blue. Just an idea I'm tossing around.

I've got a paper to write.

o.o I just saw a Long John Silver's commercial for a jumbo shrimp that was half a foot long..creepy. Not to mention a huge contradiction in terms.
Comments (1) | Permalink