Friday, June 8, 2007

Was it meant to be?
Well, I thought this would give a like, romantic tradegy, so it's just a random fanfic, happening a few months after the one I posted below! ^.^
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I was just writing in my journal one day, while waiting for Ed to finish buying new tools at the automail shop: 'I just sit in the corner everyday, watching them have fun. I'm always just the backup, just the follwer, just a friend.. or perhaps less? You treat me like you don't remember that day.. Like, it was just a horrid, dream, and foolish mistake. I can't live on, I can't go on like this.. Just thinking of you, and that day, the tension between us, I can't live knowing it wasn't real.. If only.. He could feel how I really feel about him, When he told me those sweet words, and held me in his arms so tight, I believed that he meant it.. That maybe he acually, really did lo--' the door suddenly swang opens, "Nikki, lets go!", SLAM, I quickly shut my journal closed and let out a sign, quickly mumbling under my breath, "Boooy, that was close", "Coming Ed!" quickly gathered my things and ran up to Ed and we headed back to the HQ, while we were walking, I felt so.. Empty and weird, the way he acts like it never happened, I looked at him, and he quickly turned his head and caught my eyes, I stood there shocked, and in silence, "Yes?" he said, "Oh! Nothing, nothing, just thought I.. Nevermind.", "Okay then." he replied, thats all he said.. Why doesn't he see.. how misreable I am, when he treats me like this.. Is he doing this to me because i'm vulnerable, just taking advantage of me? I just sighed and continued to walk, and at that brief seccond of time, Ed placed his right arm around my waist and grabbed my right arm with his left, pulling me closer to him, I slightly resisted but my weak self, so vulnerable, I gave into him, as he pulled he closer to his warm body, he just held me so tight, holding me against him and we stood there for awhile, I just stood there stunned and so confused.. Does he understand how I feel? "Nikki.. I'm.. ..." he whispered into my ear, "Ed.. Are you okay..?", "Nikki.. I really do care about you..", those words, just pierced my heart, and broke me up on the inside, I couldn't help but burst into tears, thinking of how he did care about me.. Or did he really care about me.. "Nikki..", I stopped holding onto him, and just dropped my arms, and he still stood here, holding me, "Nikki, I.." I just stood there and fell to my knees, and he fell with me, still holding me, he grabbed my face and started into my eyes for a long moment, and kissed me for the first time in a long time, and my heart just fluttered, overwhealming, and he pulled away from the kiss, "I really love you but.. We can't be together.. I don't want you to get hurt because, were together.." after he said that, I just died on the inside, rotted away, and I just stood up and he grabbed my arms, eagerly I tried to pull away from him but, I couldn't.. I couldn't leave him here, and he continued and pulled me into his lap, and just held me for countless hours..
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