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Wednesday, April 19, 2006


Long time no see




well.......long time no see...

I've been gone for a while

now I don't go to the computer room anymore at school...well...except today since I didn't had anything to eat and didn't wanted to walk to my old school....so I use this time to post on my site

nothing very new

Me and my friend Max went to the China town last weekend.... it was very fun, I bought some stuff

some Anime posters
a mousecarpet of Gundam Seed
a Bamboo staff
a new sword

that<'s around everything I bought

facing the cruel truth of my loneliness is hard...

yeah if you ask yourself...

I am still sad about being single and lonely

and....even though I forget about it during the day, my nights are filled with nightmares

I hate facing that truth.....it is just too cruel and painfull...everyone keep telling me that someday I will find love

but it's not someday that I want it...it's now...

it's because I so though I finally found it the last time and that in the end, it ended with my heart scattered into shards once again

it's the sixth time....and it's also the most painfull one too

all I wish.....is to find her....I dream about her...this person I don't know somewhere in this damn world....where is she?....when will she show herself to me?


damn I hate it

when will my heart will heal?
when will I be happy
when will I find her

I guess the only way I can forget about it is to do what I like

but as I said....the second I have time to think about something else it hits me as hard as a 10 wheel truck at 100 miles per hour

and I fall in depression once again...

ohhh I wish it had never ended...but it's innevitable....and it's better like this....but

sometime it happens when you want to stay asleep in your dream

well....once in a while ̀ got to confess this...right now I am okay...but it was time that I had to write it somewhere...I feel better after

yeah....and as I was saying...I dream about her

this perfect girl for me in my dreams....her face is not clear but I don't care...because even if she was ugly, how she is with me....I smile...she makes me smile...and she says she like my smile...she makes me feel good...and when I wake up I cry....because it was only a damn dream


well...it's about all I had on my heart


I seek you...wherever you are in this world my love...I shall find you!!


hope you have a good week....I don't go to school friday^^

this little fact is enough to give me a smile back

anyway...bye




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