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• 2003-10-10
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• Not killing the people in my school YET, or the world; being able to push people away; being socially isolated; let my grades go down because I'm lazy and an idiot; read all the books in my library, get my english teacher to think I self-harm (DSH)
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• I was 7, Yr 3, 1998 or so. The first anime was the infamous 'Sailor Moon'! XD
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• Most of them except Ultimate Muscle because it is soo ruubiishh-o! I Love 'Neon Genesis Evangelion'! Shinji is such a passive-aggressive boy, and he hates himself so! I can relate, because I hate myself. I hate everyone else in the world!Human condition!
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• to actually finish a story!;To not die before 40, to get a good job which I enjoy- IMPOSSIBLE!; To find someone I love; to not end up killing myself because I suffer from depression.
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myOtaku.com: Outlaw Melfina
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Welcome to my site archives. 10 posts are listed per page.
Pages (238): [ First ][ Previous ] 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 [ Next ] [ Last ]
Thursday, April 14, 2005
Art is such a fucking waste of time with Miss Murphy!
Baically, I choose something, and say I like it, and then Miss Murphy says that it should be done a different way, and rubs the fucking thing out! I swear I'm gonna kill that lady!
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Don't mind me. I can't save this on disk, so I'm gonna transfer it on Friday.
The End Of Evangelion
The End Of Evangelion is a re-edit of the final 2 episodes of Neon Genesis Evangelion both written and directed by Hideaki Anno to keep at bay those fans whom felt that the original ending was somewhat lacking. I for one appreciate the original ending for what it was - an exceptionally cleaver piece of Anime, but in the interests of completeness I have attempted to write a synopsis for The End Of Evangelion below. I have refused, however, to get bogged down in religious concepts, myths and or legends therefore the synopsis is exactly that, it's not an explanation to the end of the world as Anno wrote it...so if you're at all unhappy with it then please don't send me death threats.
The End Of Evangelion – Air
With no one else to turn to, Shinji decides to check up on Asuka's condition, though it's not looking good for the second child. Having sunk into such a deep state of depression, Asuka now lays comatose within NERV's hospital. Shinji shakes Asuka violently to try and get her to respond, though he only succeeds in tearing her clothes away from her body...as if he's got nothing better to do Shinji then proceeds to masturbate in the presence of Asuka's lifeless body.
With the Lance of Longinus/ Longlius lost, SELEE turns its attention from Lilith, to Lilith's true off spring, Eva Unit 01, in its attempt to complete the human instrumentality project any way it can. To this end, SELEE launch the first stage of their assault on NERV. In an attempt to take NERV peacefully SELEE has five other MAGI super computers from across the globe systematically hack into NERV's original MAGI computer system...the attempt is thwarted, however, as NERV drag Ritsuko out of confinement to lock down the system buying NERV sixty-two hours thinking time.
Failing the peaceful invasion of NERV, SELEE initiate stage two of their assault on NERV. As such SELEE commence heavy shelling of NERV before sending in a special force ground invasion team. The fall out is immense with NERV personnel being gunned down, torched and stabbed left, right and centre. Since NERV were setup up defensively to deal with the threat of Angel invasion, not human, the death toll rises dramatically.
Misato has Asuka stowed away at the bottom of the lake, just outside NERV headquarters, within Unit 02 to try and conceal her whereabouts from the enemy, though Shinji's no where to be found having given up the ghost and taken to his usual sulking within the depths of NERV. Shinji may have given up on himself, but Misato's hasn't...in her usual flamboyant kick ass style Misato rescues Shinji before his death wish comes true, however, Shinji has become so withdrawn now that Misato has little choice but to drag him to safety.
With Shinji literally in tow, Misato heads towards Unit 01..along the way she decides to clue him in on a few well kept truths. Humanity caused Second Impact, and they did this to minimise the potential damage caused by an Angel instigating Third Impact through contact with Lilith from whom both the Angels and humanity, i.e. the 18th Angel, were born. Second Impact resulted from reducing the Angel Adam to an embryonic state, prior to the awakening of the other Angels as depicted in the Dead Sea scrolls, thus ultimately giving rise to the Eva series through the study of Adam.
SELEE's forces locate Asuka and proceed to drop depth charges into the lake in a vain attempt to take out Unit 02. The attack is futile...though amongst all the chaos and destruction raining down around her, Asuka finally realises the true meaning of the Eva's AT Field. It is not simply a new feat of shielding technology, the AT Field stems from the soul of the Eva itself...in the case of Unit 02 Kyoko Zeppelin Souryu i.e. Asuka's mother. As Asuka finally realises that her mother is watching over her, protecting her, Asuka's confidence rockets, Unit 02 reactivates...surfaces from the depths of the lake and annihilates SELEE's forces.
SEELE fight fire with fire unleashing the remainder of the Eva series, Units 05 through 13, equipped with Kaoru's dummy plug. With Unit 02's umbilical cable severed and only three and a half minutes of remaining battery time available, Asuka's looking at downing an Eva every twenty seconds! But what does she care...with her new found confidence and her mother protecting her SELEE can kiss her ass and book passage to hell.
Having taken a bullet whilst rescuing Shinji, it's finally the end of the road for Shinji's substitute mother. Misato's last actions are to leave Shinji with a few choice words, a farewell kiss of an adult nature and finally the act of forcing him into an elevator destined for cage seven where Unit 01 is located. This final moment of separation is too much for Shinji, as the elevator departs Shinji breaks down in tears. Misato dies...
Whilst Asuka continues to tear apart the Eva series bent on her destruction, Ritsuko catches up with both Gendo and Rei deep within Terminal Dogma. In the presence of the mother of all things, Lilith, Ritsuko executes her plan, the destruction of the original MAGI super computer along with NERV. In the dying seconds of her bitter sweet revenge against Gendo, however, Ritsuko is betrayed by her deceased mother, developer of the MAGI system. The self-destruct fails to initiate...and with her mind momentarily distracted Gendo pulls his gun on her, utters a few callus words and pulls the trigger. Ritsuko dies...
Asuka finishes off the final two Eva's with seconds to spare before Unit 02 shuts down. To the horror of NERV, however, the mangled Eva series reactivates! The mutilated and contorted abominations spread their wings and take to the air before converging on Unit 02. Their revenge is hideous and one of bloodlust as Unit 02 is completely and utterly torn apart amidst a frenzied sustained assault from Units 05 through 13. Asuka dies...or so it seems.
The End Of Evangelion - My Purest Heart For You
The devil awakens as Shinji, at the helm of Unit 01, breaks out of the confines of NERV HQ spreading forth its new found angelic wings. And as it does so the original Lance of Longinus is returned to the rightful side of Unit 01. The reactivated Eva series, under the control of SELEE, seize the moment to capture Unit 01 hoisting the man made god over twelve thousand metres above the surface of the Geo Front housing NERV HQ. The Eva series are now set to begin the Third Impact purification ceremony and indeed do so as the remaining Eva series initiate an Anti-AT Field.
The shockwave from the Anti-AT Field melts away the top most layers of the Earth's crust surrounding the Geo Front thus revealing its true form...indeed the Geo Front is more than it would appear, it is Lilith's egg, the source from which the primordial soup, LCL, flows from containing life itself. With the purification ceremony under way, and having merged his right hand with Adam, Gendo plunges his hand into Rei's chest pulling it down to her womb. Though in these final moments Rei at last breaks free from her creator's hold over her refusing to be a mere puppet for Gendo to control. She absorbs Gendo's right hand, already merged with Adam, and as the empty husk she was designed to be transports the embryonic Adam to Lilith initiating the forbidden merger.
As the merger takes place Lilith takes on Rei's appearance as she rises up above the surface of the Black Moon i.e. her egg, coming face to face with Unit 01. Shinji has now completely lost his mind and is unable to comprehend anything, and when the Eva series circling around him begins to merge with Lilith, Shinji screams as his mind and ego are completely obliterated. The decision as to the fate of humanity now lies in Shinji's hands as he is confronted by Lilith, does he wish for the continued survival of humanity or does he simply wish for an end to it all. Does he want to endure, to suffer the pain of heart break and the joy of happiness or is it better to simply not exist at all?
Lilith's egg rises to meet both Lilith and Unit 01, meanwhile the Anti-AT field continues to expand enveloping the entire Earth. With the collapse of an individual's AT field ensues the release of their soul from the burden of their solid form and as such humanity returns to its original state, the primordial soup known as LCL. Humanity's sorrow and loneliness is finally released as the Earth's inhabitants relinquish hold over their solid form giving rise to the unity of all human souls i.e. the human instrumentality project. A world of no AT Fields, a world devoid of individualism. A world where you exist nowhere, yet everywhere all at once. The beginning and the end are all one in the same, all's right with the world.
But this isn't what Shinji wants...it's not real, he wants the pain, he wants the chance of real happiness. He needs that sense of realism and as such rises out of the sea of LCL, the Dead Sea, and makes his way back to shore ready to face the challenges of his new life. Whether others choose to follow in his footsteps is down to them...and thus life goes on.
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Wednesday, April 13, 2005
 The imfamous weekly report is here of the............. Confirmation class!
Well, I got out kinda late out of the flat, and it was easy going down the stairs carrying the bike, for once, I didn't nearly fall down the stairs, and then I got out without getting stuck in the door, and started my adventure! It was fine, and then I got to the final road, and saw Belinda, Marvin, and Michael, with you'll never guess who!? It was Norah! The girl who went to the same primary school, and now secondary, and acts like she doesn't know me! The bitch! So I said hi, and then went to lock up my bike. To my dismay, Kirsty was there, with her bike! I'm setting a trend! I went to the gates of my primary school with her, and started whining at the fact they changed it up once we left. Then I saw Alex, and he was there with his bike chaining it! Yay! I set a trend! Then we went to the 'Visitation House', and waited outside, while Belinda, Marvin, Micheal, and Norah went down the hill. She then showed it. Finish tomorrow! Shit! Bell went!
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 It bloody well rained this morn!
This morning, I had just brushed my teeth, and then I had to put the bin out, so I did, and then I saw it was raining! I got soaked! I'm wearing my summer dress! Grrrr!
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Tuesday, April 12, 2005
Sorry I have to post again, but I want an answer!
Why the heel has everyone got into cats and bloody well 'kitties'? I know they are a cutesy thing, and I know I have no heart, but what is the problem with all that? I hate cats! It might came from the fact that I was allergic to them as a young child, and go blind, but they are so bloody irritating! Why do you like them? Please tell me!
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 I had dentention!
WE had a detention for Drama, which was after lunch, when my sister pissed me off, because she chucked all my books, after stealing them, and chucked them on the goddamn floor! Shit! I said, "Fuck you!", as I was pissed, and then we had a 'registration detention', and at the end of school, after we had been aloud out of the classroom! I stared into space, thinking of DFA1979s 'Blood on our hands', and then we went in after Mrs Radeef mumbled somethind. She is a motherfucking shithead!
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I was so happy walking home alone! Oh joy!
I am in the library now, because I lied to the teacher, about the fact that my mum doesn't know that it was on, which is a half truth, because she isn't actually in the know, so I decided to go to the library to go on the internet! The problem is that I have lots of homework, and can't remember if I have Confirmation class. Have to go home and find out, even though they'll yabber on about the pope damn well dying!
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'S alright.
Had music. Boring as hell. Brain is kuput. Right now, Mr Hoedafia, who I call Mr ho-ho, because I did this thing in drama, where I was a santa claus man. Deborah was looking at yoai! Nearly got caught! Science boring. Nearly had a detention. Did shit in test, and as usual.
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 Soo bloody cold!
I am wearing my summer dress, and only Female outlaw the twit, is wearing it also. Not actually that cold, but there is a cold breeze. Not happy about being back to school, and Mrs Radeef just pissed me off. I want to kill her, and she has hardly spoken to me! Dress keeps riding up! Damn!
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Monday, April 11, 2005
 Back to school!
Back to seeing Deborah every weekday! Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! How can that be? It's so evil! I was so happy without her! You will note the mood will have changed since yesterday! She a fool girl!
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