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Vitals

Birthday
• 1991-07-11
Gender
• Female
Location
• somewhere where you don't know, actually London in England
Member Since
• 2003-10-10
Occupation
• Sixth Form student, fan girl, writer and struggling artist/ creator
Real Name
• Amaris Hope you like the name because it is really so!

Personal

Achievements
• Not killing the people in my school YET, or the world; being able to push people away; being socially isolated; let my grades go down because I'm lazy and an idiot; read all the books in my library, get my english teacher to think I self-harm (DSH)
Anime Fan Since
• I was 7, Yr 3, 1998 or so. The first anime was the infamous 'Sailor Moon'! XD
Favorite Anime
• Most of them except Ultimate Muscle because it is soo ruubiishh-o! I Love 'Neon Genesis Evangelion'! Shinji is such a passive-aggressive boy, and he hates himself so! I can relate, because I hate myself. I hate everyone else in the world!Human condition!
Goals
• to actually finish a story!;To not die before 40, to get a good job which I enjoy- IMPOSSIBLE!; To find someone I love; to not end up killing myself because I suffer from depression.
Hobbies
• reading, writing (all-sorts) and watching tv, getting annoyed, typing, blaming myself; being TOO perceptive; seeing all the faults of the world; telling people off if they are wrong; trying to decipher the world
Talents
• daydreaming, singing, irritating the hell out of people, scarcasm, coldness, singing out of tune, being horrible, making skwibblies, procrastinating, staring into space, drawing, forgetting things and other stuff




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myOtaku.com: Outlaw Melfina


Friday, November 9, 2007

Oh, how things do NOT change!
Today, this group I belong to, decided to do this thing whereby everyone talks about their emotional baggage. I had a blood test this morn, so I didn't know it was going ahead, and had no clue to what was happening. They used some year 12s to test this all on. Now, the THEORY WAS: 'WHATEVER IS SAID IN THE ROOM, STAYS IN THE ROOM'. Now, I didn't believe that this was likely to happen, and LO! AND BEHOLD! People started talking about it after the thing. Now, I didn't go to it, for I had a class, but I didn't want anyone to let anyone now what I've been through really, as I haven't fully accepted it myself. (My dad had this whole trip on telling me I was useless and a horrible person, forever to be unloved for I'm so terrible. He used to frequently say how it was in order to 'break' me. This was from the age of 7-11. Typing it even now hurts, and I'm starting to cry. I spent alot of time by myself due to all this. I'm a loner. My mum doesn't know any of this.) I really didn't trust people enough to just go and tell them that in all honesty, because this virulent information can be so EASILY turned against me, for people to hate me even more. *sighs*

Also, no one on here is one of those kinds of people. I like talking to all o' ya! I was talking about school. I love you all on here. ^^
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