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Vitals

Birthday
• 1991-07-11
Gender
• Female
Location
• somewhere where you don't know, actually London in England
Member Since
• 2003-10-10
Occupation
• Sixth Form student, fan girl, writer and struggling artist/ creator
Real Name
• Amaris Hope you like the name because it is really so!

Personal

Achievements
• Not killing the people in my school YET, or the world; being able to push people away; being socially isolated; let my grades go down because I'm lazy and an idiot; read all the books in my library, get my english teacher to think I self-harm (DSH)
Anime Fan Since
• I was 7, Yr 3, 1998 or so. The first anime was the infamous 'Sailor Moon'! XD
Favorite Anime
• Most of them except Ultimate Muscle because it is soo ruubiishh-o! I Love 'Neon Genesis Evangelion'! Shinji is such a passive-aggressive boy, and he hates himself so! I can relate, because I hate myself. I hate everyone else in the world!Human condition!
Goals
• to actually finish a story!;To not die before 40, to get a good job which I enjoy- IMPOSSIBLE!; To find someone I love; to not end up killing myself because I suffer from depression.
Hobbies
• reading, writing (all-sorts) and watching tv, getting annoyed, typing, blaming myself; being TOO perceptive; seeing all the faults of the world; telling people off if they are wrong; trying to decipher the world
Talents
• daydreaming, singing, irritating the hell out of people, scarcasm, coldness, singing out of tune, being horrible, making skwibblies, procrastinating, staring into space, drawing, forgetting things and other stuff




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myOtaku.com: Outlaw Melfina


Wednesday, December 19, 2007

The heart beats and the eyes roll
I'm in a bad mood. Been in one for a while now. Tired and pissed off. I'm not even doing my English essay because I had to go and do this. I am kind of glad that it's ended, but at the same time, I need resolution. The shallow breathing is really bad, and I'm shaking at the injustice of it all! I have found out, and the party involved is NOT happy!
I know life isn't supposed to be straight, but when you get to the happiness, you think it's within grasp, so much that you get swept away, and realise that it was not ever more than a dream, et you're left with the ashes of burnt 'realisations'. This musing stings, but life is not life without the pain and disarray. Straight-forwardness does not exist for some people, and I can't run away from it all, though I so feel like it.
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