Sunday, November 14, 2004

   Warning!! Angry Panda Rant Ahead!!

Whatcha lookin' at?! Ok, I am going to have to do some ranting. I guess go eat some brownies if you don't want to listen..er..read my rant to today. As always when I fire up my rant engine, if you don't want to read it just skip to the "End Rant" icon. I will let you know that in my "Arthritis Today" magazine it actually said in the November issue that you should throw yourself a "pity party" once in awhile since it is healthy. Well, today is that day my friends. I am so flipping sick and tired of being sick and tired. I am tired of taking all these stupid drugs that don't seem like they work worth beans. These expensive drugs that don't work worth beans. Maybe I should trade them in for magic beans. They would probably work better anyway. My self worth is not very high. As many of you know I am no longer able to work in my career in vet medicine because of my Rheumatoid Arthritis. I am actually going to start getting my Social Security Disability Benefits starting in January since I can no longer work. It totally sucks. I worked my butt off in school to get me where? Nowhere. Disabled. I graduated High School in 1994, I graduated with my college degree in 1995. I was going to college at the same time as high school...while working full time on top of that! John and I are not going to have any children since it would be dangerous for me, and a baby, to be on all the medications I am currently on. I am sure you guys have a pretty good idea what chemo does to people, just imagine what it would do to a baby?! Terrible. John would be such a great dad, but since I am sick, raising children, my own or adopted, is out of the question. Constant pain, side effects from the medicine that is suppose to be stopping the pain...I am just tired of it all. Helping out around theOtaku has given me something to look forward to everyday. I get to visit with the best people from all around the world and have fun. I get to enjoy everyones great artwork and read some great fan fictions. Everyone really is talented. It really does make me happy to hear about how everyone is doing in school, sports and other activities in their lives. I can live through you guys...doing things I can no longer do myself. I hate not feeling well since I don't make it to everyones sites to visit. I feel like I am missing out on all the fun. I went shopping today. Normally that would be a very happy thing for me. I am feeling a bit sick but it was to go by anime and manga...a little sickness isn't going to stop me! I get to the store and there are no handicapped parking spots open, why, there are people sitting in their cars while someone else "runs into the store for a quick purchase" and they can just jump back in and speed off. I park waaaay out at the end of the parking lot and hobble my way to the store. I know there are other people who are confined to wheelchairs that could use these spots too and it made me mad to see. People just don't care anymore. When I get home I check through my usually stuff on the OB and there is a member who is mad about a thread I closed a day or two ago, I can't remember when it was...anyway. I admit that I didn't give a detailed reason for it being closed but anyone reading the post would see it was obviously going nowhere. This person starts a new thread in the Suggestions and Feedback forum to complain. They could have PMed me about it and I would have explained, but instead decided to do this public martyr thing instead. For goodness sakes, I have had my threads closed and never took it so flippin' seriously! It's an anime/gaming message board, not the end of the world. I wish I had so little in my life to worry about that having my thread locked in the Otaku Lounge was the biggest upset of my life. I know I was wrong by not being detailed but I wasn't really in the mood to deal with explaining the obvious when I was feeling like crap. I consider myself pretty easy going when it comes to modding the Otaku Lounge so having someone complain about my job was like getting a grain of sand in my eye, not life threatening but a pain none the less. Also, Brynner, my dog, is sick. He isn't his usual obnoxious self. He is just laying around looking really depressed. I bought him a new stuffed fish when I was out but he isn't playing with is. He just picks it up and moves it with him to where he decides to lay down. It's very sad to see. I think I am done complaining now...I have to say I feel much better. Oh wait! One more thing. My throat hurts. It feels swollen and it hurts to swallow. It's been hurting for a couple of days. I am thinking if it isn't better by Monday I need to go see the doctor...yet again. >_< Now I am done. Ah, I feel much better now. A good rant is nice once in awhile. I am not going to ask a question or have a bishie break in this post today. I was looking back at my rant and I guess I was a bit overdue for a good ranting. I am going to try to make the rounds before bed. I love you all and appreciate all your support. ::huggles::

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Saturday, November 13, 2004

   Shocking Panda Secrets Revealed!!

Wow, thank you all so much for all the well wishes. I love you all and it makes me feel really special to have so many friends who care about me. ::big bear hug to all:: You guys are the best. Today is a bit better than yesterday, but I am still not back to my perky Panda self. Hopefully this weekend I will feel better. ^_^ I will definitely make the rounds to everyones sites when I am feeling better. Lots and lots of questions. As usual I have included pictures to go with my answers so for those of you on slower than slow dial up connections I am sorry. I hope you guys enjoy the answers and the pictures that accompany them. I had a fun time working on them. Answering your questions are always fun for me. ^_^ Just so you don't have to go through the entire thread for this...here is your question of the day! Do you feel older than your actual age? Do you feel like those around your age are not as mature as you? I have a bit of a strange situation. I have always been told by those older than me that I am much more mature for my age than others. I always had a very strong work ethic and took on responsibilities others didn't want to deal with. The older I get I have a feeling that some of my peers are thinking that I am not as mature since I have this anime obsession. You know, that belief that animation is for kids. ::rolls eyes:: On the other side I feel really old due to my arthritis. Handicapped parking, doctors appointments every 2 weeks, tons of medication...it's pretty sad when you are in your twenties and can relate to senior citizens because you are on the same medication! >_< I guess no matter what I will be young at heart. ^_^ Now, let's move on to what you have all been waiting for....Panda questions answered!! Shinmaru: What do you like more, yaks or bishies? Who will win this battle of the century?!?! Sunday, Sunday, SUNDAY!!! The no holds barred battle between the yaks and the bishies in the big steel yurt of death!!! Sherpas will scream! Fan girls will faint!! Don't miss the thrilling action in the big steel yurt of death!! You'll pay for the seat...but you'll only need the EDGE!! Well my dear Shin, asking me to choose between yaks and bishies is like asking me which of my children I love more! Since I don't have kids this line of questioning is invalid. No, no, no...all kidding aside I would have to say I like yaks more. Looking at it from a real life view point, I would be more comfortable around a yak than a "more beautiful than a female Supermodel" man. A beautiful man would be very intimidating to this homely little Panda. zels hoseki: If you could have anything (other than a car) what would it be? I feel pretty, oh so pretty! ::puts on evening gown and pageant smile:: I would like the knowledge to cure Rheumatoid Arthritis. The knowledge I would gain would help millions of people suffering from this terrible life altering disease. ::blows kisses and waves at adoring fans:: sailor firestar: Why did you decide to ask a question everyday? Are you questioning me?!? Several reasons. I feel it gives all my friends a chance to learn more about me and be more a part of my site...therefore, more a part of my life. Asking questions is a great way to learn about someone. You learn about what makes them the way they are, how they feel and if you are compatible as friends. For example, if you are an animal lover and you asked someone about animals and they said they enjoy setting them on fire for kicks...I am sure you would realize this is not the person you want to be your best buddy! All in all, it comes down to one main reason...I am self centered and enjoy talking about the most wonderful being in the world...me. Yami Loni: Are they really out to get me? I always feel like...someone is watching me! Yes, yes they are. Be very paranoid. You know those labels on mattresses, the ones that say "Do Not Remove Under Penalty Of Law", they are after you. They know you removed one and they are tracking you down like the tag rippin' rebel you are! They are watching...beware!! @_@ jacks heartache: What is your favorite submission move/how would you make someone tap out? When you have a monster problem, I guess all you need is a Mexican Wrestler! Personally I just like it when they use things from outside the ring...tables, chairs, prosthetic leg from a fan...whatever. It adds so much more drama. :P Now how would I make someone tap out. I am a panda. I would just sit on them!! Chocobo Gene: What is your favourite food? Got Rice? I would have to say that my all time favorite food is rice. I eat rice with almost every meal. I mean, doesn't everyone?! Or is that just a Japanese thing? Thanksgiving dinner with my family includes the traditional fare...turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, stuffing, sushi, steamed white rice...you know, the typical traditional foods for the holiday. Ren kun: If Yugi were a real person, how do you suppose he would get his hair like that, and have 3 different hair colors in such a nice, even order? Where Yugi gets his hair. I believe he would actually spend hours styling his hair everyday. At night he would have to section his hair off by color so in the morning he could take each section and style them separately. Lots and lot of hair spray...perhaps some glue as well. Or, it's just a wig he throws on everyday. That would probably be the most practical. And he would buy it from Katie Bair since she rocks at making the best cosplay wigs ever! Baron Samedi: How would you describe the pain of arthritis? Not my hands, but it's what I get to look forward too. Lucky me. I am sorry about your mum. My heart goes out to her. There are two different types of pain I feel. The regular everyday pain and the pain of a flare up. The best way I can describe the pain of a flare up is think about running and twisting your ankle. The sharp pain that shoots through your twisted ankle is pretty much what it feels like...just move that pain to every join in your body and make it last for hours or days. The chronic everyday pain is more like the feeling you have the day after working out really hard. You know, you wake up and feel like you got run over by a steam roller, that is what it feels like the rest of the time. Each person is different, some are worse than my experience while others have a much easier time. I pray your mum is one of those who only had mild discomfort. ::hugs:: ShikyoKasu: What's better, gravity or cable? You can't fight gravity! ::scratches head:: Gravity or cable? I don't understand the question? ::cries:: anatema: What's your favorite band? I could never get my hair that big in the 80's. Perhaps they figured out how to beat gravity?! Oh, this is a tough one. I love music. Absolutely love it. Because of that I have a really difficult time choosing who is my favorite. It usually changes with my mood. For instance, right now I have been in a bit of a 80's hair band mood and have been listening to a lot of Vixen on my computer. My ringtone on my phone is "Breaking the Habit" by Linkin Park and if you look in the stereo in the living room the disk in it is Phantom of the Opera, the one in the bedroom is the Wolf's Rain soundtrack and in my car is ABBA. I can't choose just one favorite band, I just love all kinds of music so much it changes with my moods. And we all know how mood I am!! kidotaku: watz kev? BankofKev extra special fan art! The correct phrasing of this question should be who is Kev?! My dear close friend Kevin has been a great support to me in the past few years. He is a wonderful guy who deserves all the happiness in the world. I love him to death and I made that little picture for him since he is a big time Producer in the entertainment industry. How could I not do something special for the guy who took me to the Sailor Moon Slumber Party at Kumoricon, sing songs on my voice mail, cheering me up when I am feeling down and laughing at my jokes...he really is a wonderful guy. John is just lucky he married me before I met Kev! ~_^ BankofKev: You're not sick because of my singing "Every Rose Has It's Thorn" are you? Pandas love karaoke! No my dear Kev, I am having a RA flare up right now and I feel like I got run over by a steam roller. Your singing made me smile and now I know what we have to do at AX while standing in line (God knows there are lines for everything at AX)! We can sing 80's songs to each other! We will definitely have to go to karaoke again like back in 2003 during AX. Hopefully Brian won't be there to be a microphone hog! blackwings: What quality to you like your anime to have? "Tiny pieces..." Quality eh. I like it to have a solid story line base to build off of then seemless animation. Finally good voice acting, all this together is what makes or breaks an anime for me. If you want an example of terrible voice acting listen to the VA's in Macross: Clash of the Bionoids. ::shivers:: It takes good animation and storyline and drives it into the ground. the fizz: What is your fav. name? Hiro is such a great guy. Favorite name...that isn't a simple question!! lol I've always loved my brother's name which is Hiroshi. I think I love that name so much because it makes me think of my big brother. ^_^ Godel: What is the average wing-speed velocity of a swallow? Answer me these questions three... What do you mean, an African or European Swallow? Is it laden or unladen? I need more information here to give a decent answer! Fear me, I know my Python! KitsuneTsuki: How many fingers am I holding up? You are definitely a tricky one! The answer to that is none. At the time you were typing that you had your fingers on the keyboard! Therefore you wouldn't have any fingers being held up!! Unless you have one of those voice recognition programs and you are just talking to your computer. Which would be very interesting if someone were watching you, talking to the computer, asking it how many fingers you were holding up. They would think you had lost your mind! Oh, what a dilemma! I am sticking with my first answer of no fingers. ^_^ Phew!! That was a lot of typing! Hopefully the typos won't be too distracting. I hope I didn't miss anyones questions while I was typing this up. If I did, I will answer them in tomorrows post. It was a kick in the pants kids. I love you all and thanks again for all the well wishes, they really do mean so much to me. I feel loved. It keeps my spirits up and I appreciate your support. You guys are the best. I love you all very much. ::huggles:: Hope everyone has a great weekend and remember that a Panda loves you very much. ^_^ ::passes out from all the typing:: ::huggles:: ::passes out from all the typing::

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Friday, November 12, 2004

   Yakkity-Yak...

Don't talk back! I am not feeling well. I am sorry that I haven't been going to everyone's sites. Mr. Yak is back to help entertain everyone. Bask in the warming warmness of his Yakkiness. Bishie Break time. Oh so cute. No question of the day, feel free to post any question to me that you want. Hope you like it Kev. Take care, I will visit your sites when I am feeling better. Love ya all. ::huggles::

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Thursday, November 11, 2004

   WTF?!?

Caution: Causes Cancer!? I will get into all that in a bit. First things first, I suggest everyone go read SomeGuy's myO blog. His blog is excellent and everyone should go read it. His information on the Japanese Internment Camps is something I feel very strongly about. I feel this is history that everyone needs to know about. Go now, read, become enlightened. Now, I shall now take my blog to the complete opposite end of the spectrum from SomeGuy's site and drive mine into the ground! Time for my bishie break! Oh how I wish I could be that forward with some people. Ok, now I am sure some of you are wondering WTF do I mean by snails causing cancer. Well, today John was informed by a guy who came into his office that he knows what causes cancer. Snails. Snails that live inside our bodies. These snails go about their business but if their shells get worn down they go to a weak point in your body and cause cancer. O_o;; All this time, who knew little snails living in our bodies are the reason people get cancer!! It's only so obvious! Where can we find this Kung Fu Killer, perhaps he can take out the cancer causing snails!! Now that your brain cells are dying, time for your question of the day!! What is the most ridiculous thing you have heard someone say? On a side note to my dear BankofKev: You can't use ANY of that guy's blog stuff you have been sending me lately. You have to find something else! It would really be cruel to use that against me again...once was enough! @_@ I think the snail thing for me has to rank pretty high up there. There's lots and lots of medical things I have heard that are quite frightening. Like you can cure Feline Infectious Peritonitis (FIP) with antioxidants. It would be like curing AIDS with vitamins. If it were that easy, why do people (and kitties with FIP) die everyday!?! I have also heard that whistling at night will attract snakes! I am sure there are tons of crazy things I have heard but most of the time I try to forget them so I don't go crazy. This makes me think of something comedian Lewis Black once heard someone say: "If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college." Whaaaa?? It just makes you scratch your head and wonder. Just some random panda-ness. Well, I guess that is about it. Love you all and thanks for stopping by. Be sure to go read SomeGuy's blog, it really means a lot to me to get this piece of history out to everyone. Chat with you all soon! ::huggles:: edit: Thanks Shin for the correction, I blame it on lost brain cells due to the stupid things I hear...like cancer causing internal snails...and chemo. :P BankofKev, sorry no art yet, still working on it!

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Wednesday, November 10, 2004

   The 80's were totally awesome!

I'm Hungry. I'm thinking I should do an entire post dedicated to the 80's one of these days. Oh what fun it would be! I am really going to think about this. ^_^ Today I went to the doctor and got more blood drawn and had my chemo injection. I am the Panda Pin Cushion!! Oh well, right now I am feeling pretty good which is quite unusual. I hope it lasts. ^_^ If I start feeling bad and don't make it to your sites you know why. John did do something special for me today to help cheer me up, he bought me a Newtype and Gravitation vol 3 DVD. Now I have something to keep me busy if I start to feel bad tomorrow. ^_^ I think we need a Kare Kano bishie break today! I would be in Asaba's flock. Question of the day time! We all have skeletons in our closets. Deep dark secrets we wouldn't want to see the light of day. I want you all to be 100% honest with me. What is your secret vice? What do you secretly indulge in that you wouldn't want your classmates or co-workers to find out about? For me, I am a power ballad freak! I love those cheesy 80's hair band love ballads. I will turn on my car stereo full blast and sing at the top of my lungs these songs. What makes this embarrassing for me was in college I worked at a music store selling cds, tapes and concert tickets for Ticketmaster. It was during the big "Grunge" movement. Living in Washington state everyone listened to and worshiped Grunge. I loved Grunge, yet, still couldn't let go of the 80's power ballads. If my co-workers back then knew about my secret love of big hair bands I would be laughed out of the building! Needless to say I have come to terms with my power ballad vice and have embraced it. I no longer hide my love of the power ballad. Right now I am listening to Vixen "Edge of a Broken Heart". "I've been doing things your way to long well baby that's over (baby that's over) it won't be easy but I've got to be strong and if I wanna cry I don't need your shoulder!" Oh, and since many of you were born in the 80's you really missed out. I had big, BIG permed out hair. Oh you could say it was Southern Pageant Hair. Maybe I will find some of those classic 80's pictures of me and post them. I am sure you could all use a good laugh! I gotta get rollin' I hope to make it to everyone's sites later, but no guarantees since I got my chemo today and it usually makes me sick for a couple of days. If I don't go by your sites you know why. I love you all and wish everyone all the happiness and health in the world! ::huggles::

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Tuesday, November 9, 2004

   Which way to the Juusenkyo Springs?!

Nihao! Hooray! John is finally feeling better! He is feeling much better now. Thank goodness. Now we just need to get everyone else on myO to get better. That means you too Mamma Vash! John's feeling well enough to play GTA: San Andreas again so I know he is feeling better. :P On a different note I did get some great news today. One of John's old college roommates, Mike, and his wife Andrea are expecting their first baby! Hooray! With all the bad stuff I had been dealing with lately it is wonderful to get some happy news. ^_^ Time for a bishie break! Tatewaki Kuno, age 17, the Blue Thunder of Furinkan High! I know, he can be a bit of a goober, but I still love Kuno. Oh, and for you Ranma 1/2 fans, I am one of those people who think that Kuno and Nabiki should hook up. They are just the perfect couple. Kuno has money, Nabiki wants money and I think she is the only one who would be able to tolerate his ego. :P Question for the day time! There are many pairings in anime/gaming that fans feel should be together, but aren't? Or how about couples who are together who you think shouldn't be? I already touched on one couple I think should be together, Nabiki and Kuno. Whenever they have an episode where the characters pair up they seem to end up together and I love the way they play off of each other. Rumiko Takahashi really should have put those two together. ^_^ Shake your groove thing! Well, I hope everyone is having a great week. Take care of yourselves and I will chat with all of you very soon. Love you all! ::huggles::

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Monday, November 8, 2004

   zzzz

I'm Tired. Poor John, he was so restless last night. His fever has been going up and down all day. He's so sick he can't even play GTA: San Andreas! Needless to say I am very tired too. I think I responded to all the PM's you guys sent me, hopefully they all made it to you. I know I had trouble with one. Oh bother. Let's just have a bishie break. Sanzo smiling... Question for the day: What is your favorite video game? My favorite video game is Karaoke Revolution. Why, because I am a singing fool. If anyone wants to challenge me to "I Believe in a Thing Called Love", you are on!! ::strikes best rock star pose:: Did I mention that I am tired? Sorry I didn't make it to sites today. I will try to make it by to visit everyone tomorrow. I just really need to get some rest. Sorry this is such a lame update. Since all I have been doing to taking care of a sick guy all day (and night) I really haven't had much time to do much of anything else. I love you all and will try to make it by your sites soon. Hope some of this rambling made sense. ~_~ zzzz ::huggles::

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Sunday, November 7, 2004

   Short Update.

Road trip! John (my hubby) and I drove 3 hours up north to visit his parents. I was a very nice visit. Unfortunately from when we got there to the time we were leaving John started to feel sick. So I ended up driving home. About 1/2 way home he started to get those nasty fever shakes. Poor guy. I got him home I threw him in a warm bath. Then I took his comfy clothes and his bath towel and threw them in the dryer to warm them up. While he was in the bath I made some hot soup for him and got him a tall glass of orange juice with a straw of course. I then got his warm towel out of the dryer along with his clothes and got him all bundled up. Gave him some meds to reduce his fever (103.2 temp.) Turned on some anime and let him eat his dinner in front of the tv. Now he is resting peacefully. Phew!! That was a lot for me to do. Thank goodness I was feeling better today! We would have been a really sorry couple if I was still feeling bad!! Time for a band bishie break! Bad Luck and Nittle Grasper! Ok, one girl in the mix but that is ok, she's a part of the band. ^_^ Time for your question of the day. Have you ever had to take care of a sick family member? Did it drive you crazy or were you happy to nurse them back to health? Did you do anything extra special for the sick family member? Obviously you can tell that I have taken care of a sick person before. And you all know John takes care of me all the time. I think it is time for me to repay the hundreds of kind acts he has done for me. It's weird since it doesn't seem like work, I actually really enjoy taking care of him. I think the best part is he is feeling so icky that when I tell him to do something, like "Go sit down! Eat this! Drink this! Take this medicine!" he does it without complaining. As for special things, usually I make some "comfort" food for the "patient", something warm and comforting. I am a speed demon!! Well, besides John getting sick today was a good day. I am really tired from driving all the way back home but it was still fun. I hope all of you are having a great day and I will make it to all the sites I missed earlier. I love you all! ::huggles::

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Saturday, November 6, 2004

   I just had a great phone conversation.

I could barely crawl out of bed this morning. It's been a roller coaster ride dealing with my health this week. Up, down, 'round and 'round. I hope to be feeling better soon. But I am tired about talking about that. Let's move on to something completely different. My wonderful phone call on Friday night! I want to give a very special shout out / congratulation to one of my dearest friends. Recently he got a dream job for any anime fan boy, he is now working in the anime industry! You know I will always be your #1 rabid fan girl stalker! After all, what anime industry insider wouldn't want a rabid otaku stalker fan girl..er..panda after him?! I am so happy for you, now the next time we go out to dinner I expect that you pick up the check! ~_^ Love you much! Today I feel like doing something different for my bishie break. Not that there is anything wrong with super cute anime boys, heavens no. I figured I would give the boys a break from the typical bishiness of my site. Now it is time! A very special bishie break for the love of my life... Brynner. Yes, I know, not the typical bishie break today, but he is just so darn cute! Brynner is my pup. I say pup but he is 7 years old but doesn't look or act like his age. He weighs about 100 pounds and loves to run. If he were a real guy, he would be that really cute guy in school who's very athletic and popular... but not too bright. Brynner always has that cheesy grin on his face. When he stands up on his hind legs he is taller than me. He's a big boy. My question of the day is about pets. Do you have pets? What are their names? What are they? Will you have pets when you "grow up" and are living on your own? My pets include Ana Ng the siamese cat (she's got social problems), Brynner the large mixed breed dog who was abandoned, Heston another large breed mixed dog who was an abuse case and Harrison an orange tabby cat with deformed front legs. Needless to say, they are rescue animals from the vet clinic I worked at. It's hard not to take home the pets who need special care. Since I am a "grown up" ::listens as laughter fills the air:: I will always have pets. It's in my nature. I love taking care of animals and making them happy. Time to go to bed. Well, I suppose I am done rambling now. I will visit your sites tomorrow. ^_^ Love you all and hope you are all having a great weekend. ::huggles::

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Friday, November 5, 2004

   Random Panda-ness.

Pandas love to travel. Feeling better, but not 100% yet. But better none the less. ^_^ You guys rock! I wasn't expecting so many people willing to fill out the surveys. Thanks, all the comments were fun to read and made me smile. You guys are so good to me. I just love you. ::huggles:: For those of you who didn't fill out the survey, I still love you guys too. ::huggles:: I did feel well enough to make a few new greetings and wallpapers. If you get a chance go check them out. I was watching Azumanga Daioh and felt inspired. ^_^ Time for a sweet bishie break! Would you like some candy? Back to the normal length question of the day. Do you like to travel? Where was the last place you traveled? Where is the next place you would like to go? I love to travel. The last place I went to was Kumoricon in Portland, Oregon. Other than that I have just done little day trips to Seattle, Wenatchee, Tonasket and Kennewick, Washington. The next place I am going for an actual vacation would be AX in Anaheim, California. It's funny, when I stay in the state it doesn't really feel like traveling to me. If I get on a plane or drive for more than 6 hours...then I consider it traveling. Bright lights, big city. Thanks again for the surveys you guys, they were a much needed emotional boost I needed. ::huggles::

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