myOtaku.com: PeachesXCream

myO Still <3's You

Vitals

Birthday
• 1991-10-26
Gender
• Female
Location
• In the US of A. :B
Member Since
• 2006-02-27
Occupation
• Obssesor, fangirl, idiot, menace to society, etc.
Real Name
• *shifty eyes* Momo...

Personal

Achievements
• I know a little Japanese. :D
Anime Fan Since
• Before I was an embryo. o_O
Favorite Anime
• DEATH NOTE (:D), Chobits, Trigun, Hana Kimi, Naruto, any shoujo, yaoi, or yuri.
Goals
• To meet Dir en grey, start a band, move to Japan, and become a Japanese translator.
Hobbies
• Listening to music, reading, studying Japanese, writing, watching movies, obsessing, smelling things, etc.
Talents
• I'm okay at learning different languages and am pretty open minded...

myOtaku.com: PeachesXCream

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Mushi?
Current Mood: Depressed
Current Song:

Last night was complete hell. I haven't cried that hard in a while. You see, my dad forgot I was having my moles removed, mainly because my mom didn't want to tell him again because he dissaproved of it in the first place. I told him over the phone and I could see how angry he was just by hearing him. Mainly because I was so stressed out and I was tired from worrying all day, I went to sleep. Unfortunately, I woke up to my father screaming at Mom... I don't think I've heard him scream at her like that. I was half awake, but I still understood what they were saying. I think the thing that scared me the most was whenever Mom said "the doctor said her moles were suspicious!" and Dad replied "I'll show you suspicious!" For the first time in my life, I actually believed that he was gonna hit her. Before I was even awake enough to see anything, tears blurred my vision and I ran to my room and shut the door behind me. Logan (my brother) came in after shortly and tried to comfort me. It hurts so much to know that I, his older sister, can't take care of him. He's seen me breakdown more times than I can count. The fighting eventually stopped... I don't know when, I was too busy crying. But Mom came in and ordered me to stop crying, like she always does whenever I'm upset. Eventually Dad came in and gave me one of his pep-talks that always make me feel better, even though I still don't believe everything he tells me. Like I'm "a good kind", "not responsible for everything bad that happens in the family", "talented", etc. Even though I didn't believe his fake praise, I did find his talk more helpful than Mom's.

Nothing much has gone on today other than explaining people what happened to my face and introducing Storm to Dir en grey (she likes them and has an eye for Die and Toshiya... most people do whenever they're first introduced to DIRU O_o, and her favorite song is "Child Prey." Once again, another popular choice for newcomers to DIRU). Anyhow, I found out wheather Daniel was cheating on me or not. I called him and explained the rumor I heard and asked him wheather it was true or not. I tried to use the calmest voice I could and I told him that if he was cheating on me, I wouldn't get mad... but if he lied to me, I would. He claims she's just an ex-girlfriend that wants to get back together. Needless to say, that really lowered my self-esteem. I'm already depressed about Mom and Dad fighting, so I started thinking about all of my faults and how I probably don't stand a chance against his ex. I'm not pretty, I'm not skinny, I'm not smart, I'm not nice, I'm not talented, etc. I could go on forever on all of the things I don't have... but that makes me feel even worse. I think of all the starving, homeless, diseased, and abused chlidren and feel even worse about myself because of how a selfish bitch I am. I don't know... maybe my mind is diseased or something. I just want to stop crying.
+Momo+
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