Saturday, March 4, 2006

Taken from Kawaii Seth's Journal
There's certain ways that people when they bite it and they show it on
the new... you laugh. Like who gets killed by bees?!
Anytime they come on the news like, "A man in Austin was killed by bees."
I just fucking laugh. How do you get killed by bees?!
If you're walking through the woods, right, and you come near a bush
and you hear *BZZZZZZZZZZZ* just, you know,
Run away from that bush. Whos going near that bush going,
"HEY IS THAT BEES?" hold on one second, "OH JEEZE! AHHH!"
Dude Fuck that! I would punch every bee in the face!
Bees aren't taking me out, I'd be like, "FUCK YOU BEE!"
*PUNCH*
"YEAH FUCK YOU BEE! ALRIGHT BEE COME ON! YEAH!"
*BZZZZZZZ* *PUNCH*
"Where's the next bee at?!" It's a fucking bee!
I could undestand if it was like killer horses, Thats scary shit!
Flying through the air kicking you in the face
*NEHHHHHH*
*KICK*
*NEHHHHHH*
THATS SCARY! FUCK BEES! ......FUCK BEES!

Know one wants to drown. drowning would be the worst, cause everyone
knows that feeling. That feeling that you get, Oh its the worst.
When you think you're drowning. like during the summer,
You're like at a pool party or something.
"I'm gonna go into the deep end. Watch my dive. Watch my dive.
"Right, then you dive in.
*SPLASH*
And the second you get to the bottom your like,
"GET ME OUTTA HEEEERE!! WHERES THE SURFACE?!!"
And you always some up under the kid on the raft.
"Jesus Christ Timmy! Do not float above me when
I'm Dying in the Abyss! Your son almost killed me with his,
Uhhhh, Daffy Duck raft over here John. Your son tried to murder me
in your pool. Float away for me. Float away."

Fire. Has anyone here ever been fully engulfed in fire?
Its gotta be soo hot. That is way to fucking hot.
Its the worst feeling when you burn yourself too.
You know, sometimes you're making sure soup or some oodlesof noodles
or something; Or you're cooking up some crack. And you know,
You touch the side of the pot. Just that little
*TSSSS*
"WOAH!!" That, Fucking kills!! That little thing, you can't take a shower
for like three weeks. You gotta like hold your hand out cause the steam
makes you angry. You try to bring your hand in,
"OOOOOO! I HATE STEAM! WHOEVER INVENTED STEAM SUCKS!"

You know what would be the worst?? This would be the ultimate worst
right here. What if you dove into the pool, and while you were
at the bottom of the pool freaking out, somebody poured oil on the
surface and lit it on fire! Yeah then you're like,
"AHHHHHH!"
You gotta just keep swimming around, feeling for a spotwhere theres
no fucking fire. Then, What if you found a circle where there was no fire,
but the second you came up a big dude just punched you in the face
"Get back in the fiery water!
You don't come out of the fiery water, cover up that hole with some fire now!
Get back in the fiery water!"


When I was a little kid I thought I wanted to be a fireman.
I think a lot of guys- Did you wanna be a fireman when
you were a little kid? People ask you..What do you want to be?
I wanna be a FIREMAN! I didn't really wanna be a fireman.
I thought I did. I just really wanted to spray shit with a hose.
That's what I really wanted to do. I wanted to be like a spray-man.
No I was fucking good. I'm not laughing. I was really good with the hose.
I could make it look like if make it feel like it was raining.
If you closed your eyes, you would think it was raining.
That's how good I was. You'd be like Oh my god it is really raining.
It's very cold rain. That's how good I was and I'm not laughing.
You're laughing, i'm not laughing. I could not be a fire-
If I go to a house and it was fully on fire. Fuck that! I quit.
I would just stand outside and watch it burn with everybody else.
And the woman next to me be like... Please my son,
he's screaming in there. I'd be like Well he's probably on fire!
That's what happens when you're on fire lady...
What are you doing out here? You fucking think for yourselfer.
Why didn't you make a map for him or something?

A policeman. I don't know how they do that job man.
What about those cops in New York. I just saw this on CNN a few days ago.
In New York, these cops freaked out, they shot this guy like 15 times
because they said they thought he had a grenade.
He was eating a pear! How do you fuck that up?!
Unless he was eating it like OOOOO (takes bite, throws pear)
THAT'S A DELICIOUS PEAR!
(All by Dane Cook.)

When I commented, I posted:

I didn't think it was you who typed it. Although you are the type of person to do post that kind of stuff from your own head, there was something about it I couldn't put my finger on. I don't know I'm crazy. But I definately don't want to die by any of those means. I wish I could die in some sort of battle. If I get too old, like Nittle Grasper in your profile, I'd commit Hara Kiri ^.^

I had nothing to post, so I just thought I'd post this. It was Hella-funny.
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