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Tuesday, December 12, 2006


Last night I couldn't get any sleep.

When I look into the mirror I see someone different staring back at me.

I know it's me but my eyes are telling me a different story.

I'm trying not to let the world get to me.

All I feel like doing is hibernating through this month. I have no money to buy people gifts. Like Becca said, you grow to hate Christmas shopping. I don't even have the money to hate Christmas shopping this season. Everyone around me is complaining about how they don't have the money for this and that, but they don't see what it's like knowing you won't have the money to buy your boyfriend a one year anniversary gift or even have the money to buy him a card. It sucks.

I want to curl up in my blankets and go back to sleep.


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and for what little humor i may have for today...

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Monday, December 11, 2006


   stress writing.....

for guys who need help understanding what "us women want"....


When I say I feel uncomfortable, I am saying, please help me feel better.

When I say the name of the day that we separate for awhile, please remember that we have limited amount of time in each others presence and take advantage of it.

When I say I want to talk, please see that I am trying to improve things and it isn't the easiest thing to do when the world is bringing you down.

When I call your work, please see that I am trying not to be bothersome, I just went through a brain beating day and needed to hear your voice for a moment.

When I am feeling worried or depressed, please see that that is me, that's the person who you are with, help make things better.

Run your fingers through my hair.

Rub my back.

Kiss my forehead.

Love on me like you want me to love on you.

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gah! Only a few more minutes until I am out of here!

Anticipation.

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Friday, December 8, 2006


   After I got off of the phone the first time, I cried the whole way across the parking lot. I felt like such a loser.
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   Becca and Susan, it's no one's fault for the screwy confused plans. lol. We're all seniors now and all go to different schools and all have a bazillion things going on everyday. Let's do it next week. I agree. Next Friday. =)


Sarah and I left school yesterday. I decided I wanted Jack-in-the-Box. My driver's side window doesn't roll down, so Sarah sat in the back seat and ordered for us. While we were getting our food, i noticed the guy in the car behind us and he smiled, of course it was sarah's staring at him that provoked it, but we waited on him to pull up beside us and she got his number. Age 23, light redish facial hair and very very blue eyes. AND an earring. So I guess he's her type... unless he likes any 80's music and doesn't like metallica... we'll all see though.
We spent all day watching tv and movies. After awhile it got old because everything is basically a re-run. So we went out at 7 something and saw Casino Royale, which so kicked ass!

Well I'm about to have to be in class soon. So Let's go out next Friday. Reserve next Friday!!

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Wednesday, December 6, 2006


   Photobucket - Video and Image HostingPhotobucket - Video and Image Hosting i Photobucket - Video and Image HostingSquee and Gir.



Hey Becca and Susan, Saturday I'm going to a show. And Becca is going to a family party on Saturday. And Susan's doing something Saturday. I think it should be on Friday then, after school.




Chris told me that I looked stressed today. I appreciate him talking to me and all, but today in all reality, I'm am so cheerful. Rae kept telling me I was depressed... I told him to shut up before I beat the shit out of him. Heh. Everyone's pissy at me because I told them off for always asking me about Sarah all of the time. What is so great about Sarah? I swear they just sit around and talk about how cool she is and keeps asking me what she looks like naked and if she has a bunch of body hair or not. EWW. dyke-whore who messed around and fucked over and used the guy I wanted and would have treated SO MUCH BETTER. cunt.

Anyways. I have to clean the whole house today and I must clean out my car before my mom takes it to get my tires changed.

Well hopefully Friday I can see you guys! I miss you all! And nothing against Jasmine or anything, just whenever I'm around you (Becca) and Jasmine, she seems so depressed and it seems like she gets you down a lot.



Susan and Caleb sitting in a tree K-I-S-sumthin-sumthin-sumthin-G! (from the Movie Cars).



this reminds me of jason... well except he always said "slap my ass and call me Sally."
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End.

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Tuesday, December 5, 2006


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I'm so very tired.

I'm waiting to get out of here and that is at 1:30... it isn't even 12:30.

This weekend I may be going with Thad to Indiana. yuck. Hopefully on Friday I will have the money to go out with Susan and Becca. I need some girl time anyways.

I'm going back to sleep.

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Friday, December 1, 2006


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i wonder if trees feel, too.

when i get home i'm going to clean clothes and my car. then i will lay down and drink some hot chocolate and try not to look at the clock.

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   another day that i dread school.

once again i while be Prisoner.

i cannot wait to escape this routine although i know i will miss it later.

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Thursday, November 30, 2006


   my mind is made up.


i am officially disappointed.

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