Monday, March 14, 2005

   As free as a worker ant
Sometimes I fear that I will never know what "freedom" really feels like. First of all, anyone who has been to school knows how tyrannical some teachers can be. Combine this with the fact that the school duped my parents into signing my legal rights over to a special needs "service" and you have one VERY oppressed student. All I wanted was a normal four years in High School...something nice to look back on when I'm old and gray. This "service" cruelly stole this from me, and left their mark on my permanent record in order to ensure that I never get anything other than a "volunteer" (all work, no pay) job. What's worse, this program forced me to go about singing their praises wherever I went, and forced me to disclose my so-called "disability" (really I don't have one, but they tricked my parents into thinking I do) to everyone I met. Furthermore, they wouldn't let me go out on dates unless it was a pre-arranged "pity date". The staff tried to portray me as either "mentally challenged" (which I'm not, my I.Q. is over 150) or "psychologically unstable" (which they may have been right about by the end of my High School career).



The staff were permitted to do whatever was "necessary" to ensure COMPLETE compliance. This included beatings, destruction of my personal property, use of a behavior plan (which was there PURELY for my humiliation. Occasionally the staff would take steps to provoke me or frame me, creating the illusion of necessity), attacks on my friends and other such unpleasantries. I would complain to my parents about it, but the response was always the same; "They're your friends. They're here to HELP you."




Needless to say, I'd rather forget my High School days. I'd LIKE to forget about it, but noooooo. One of the conditions for my going to college was that I be forced to take a liason from this "service" EVERY STINKIN' PLACE I GO. These people are going to bother me until THE DAY I DIE. Because of them, I can never have a job, never own property, never fufill ANY of my dreams.

But I take it in stride to this day. Never have I retaliated, Rarely have I attempted to defend myself.

To the world, I am nothing. I will NEVER be free. Not even in my dreams.
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