Wednesday, February 2, 2005

   Back after a short absence...
...Sorry I didn't update yesterday or get to barely any of your sites...I went to the doctors yesterday....I'm anemic. I have to take vitamins and if it's bad enough iron pills. That has some of the cause of my period problems. I also got a...you know what. And fuck it hurt! They stick this really big thing up there and...ouch. Well, it's not like ultra big...but it's pretty damn big around. Then they take this brush thing and stick it up there and....it just felt painful and weird. And after it was done they came back with my blood result tests and it said I was anemic. So, they wanted to see how low my iron was so yet again another prick, but this time in the arm and not on the finger. I saw the needle and I was afraid I was gonna barf and told them that so they sent me down to the hospital lab because they didn't want my throw up all over thier shoes. It was the smallest needle they had to. And I still was about to pass out. It wasn't as painful as the one in my finger...but anyways. Just to let all of you know I am also now on birth control. wheeee fun. I didn;t like the doc very much. She was too damn blunt. i would have posted earlier today, but I had to fix the school's cookies page to where I could even log onto MyO. I ahd to get the block wall down as well. i am a little hacker huh? But anyways how has it all been going? Hope everything is well. I also got compliements from my teacher on my stories. She says I should put them into contests. But nah. I ain't that good yet. I wish my scanner would work...I wanna show you guys my awesome art. By the way if anyone knows how to get an mp3 (an actual song, not the midi) up on the site it would be kindly appricated if you could tell me. I know Chara does and she said something about a player? But well I'll leave you be. Bai-bai. By the way if any of you have never listened to Tsunami Bomb, you most definetly should. hehehehehge Heather had the only song of their's I've heard stuck in my head. But you should also listen to The Screaming Trees as well. And the misfits and Danzig and The Used. But hugs and bai bai. Also look for a sorta Valenitnes day layout to come.....maybe.
~Lynnsey +_+
ps. Phish and Trey Anastasio are good as well.
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Monday, January 31, 2005

   hehehehe I am school girl sweet!
In my Godsmack shirt and black Jeans and Dragon penticale necklace. Yes my voice does sound a bit school girl sweet, but maybe thats because I am kinda in a way... but anyways today has been pretty damn good compared to what I have to go through tomorrow. I have to get a PAPSMEAR!!! >< Cringes and disguts me to think about it. But well lats ngiht the randomest thing happened. Hehehehehe Freddy called me up and we talked for like 10 minutes. It was fun. He said he was going to be at school today, but I knew he probably wouldn't come because he has the flu...The only reason he wanted to come was to see if his band made talent show. And as soon as the name Headless Hudson was read I got al excited and jumped. They made it!! Happiness abound! Now I have to definetloy go to the talentshow. we had fun in CW today. That class is my favorite! ^^ well gotta run! Have fun and love all of you!
~Lynnsey +_+
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Sunday, January 30, 2005

   part of yesterdays post and todays...
meh....
It's been an allright day down here...how bout where you guys are? I fell into a bad depression last night. I was so cold...I couldn't feel anything at all. I don't know if any of you experince that, but every once in a while it happens to me. It hasn't occured since last year (really early last year and actually sometime round this time.) but my mother cried for me and everyone thought I was possesed because for some reason I can't talk loud and I just say i hate everyone...i remeber telling Chris I didn't love him last night during that time. And it made him cry...I don't know why I told him that but at the time I had a reason...But anyways I went to sleep and had a really good dream and it was great. But anyways I talked to Shintoga last night and he is so RAD!!! hehehehehe he said he didn't expect my voice to sound like I did!! ^^''' we had an interesting conversation...I couldn't really say ,much because of Brandys kids being near so I couldn't really say much of anything at all and I had to talk really low....but anyways...Ryu updated today...yeah. wheeee I think he hates me or something...meh I dunno. I try not to care but it only hurts me more. well whatever...he can at least talk to Jenny if he doesn't like me anymore...She shouldn't have to lose a freind because I fucked up. Meh...Chris came over today and we had sex. It was nice. He is going to spend the night next weekend. My cousins headstone is finally up in the graveyard and Brandy wants someone to be there just in case I go schizo or something...Because it means everyhting is set in stone. Cuz is dead and not ever going to come back. He'll never call me over to his chair to give him a hug...he'll never say "Love and Peace"...he'll never be there again. But anyways...I'll be alright i think...just hope for the best I suppose. But anyways Luke is here *dances* I love my little brother. He's so awesome. I was listening to Slipknot and he made me turn it down to say one thing.." hehehehehehe I farted" He is also getting into Slipknot. But anyways this probably getting to be long...so love all of you. hugs.
~Lynnsey +_+
All right now for today....
It's almost 1 am here... whats going on? I just found out that Aubrey isn't going to be on here much...makes me sad. it made me cry because all my freinds seem to be abandoning me again...but oh well/ Gotta go. Chris is being fucking anoying and calling me every goddamn second...it's not that I don't love him, i just don't think he realizes how much trouble i get into over this and that I don't want to talk to him 24/7...bai.
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Saturday, January 29, 2005

   meh....
It's been an allright day down here...how bout where you guys are? I fell into a bad depression last night. I was so cold...I couldn't feel anything at all. I don't know if any of you experince that, but every once in a while it happens to me. It hasn't occured since last year (really early last year and actually sometime round this time.) but my mother cried for me and everyone thought I was possesed because for some reason I can't talk loud and I just say i hate everyone...i remeber telling Chris I didn't love him last night during that time. And it made him cry...I don't know why I told him that but at the time I had a reason...But anyways I went to sleep and had a really good dream and it was great. But anyways I talked to Shintoga last night and he is so RAD!!! hehehehehe he said he didn't expect my voice to sound like I did!! ^^''' we had an interesting conversation...I couldn't really say ,much because of Brandys kids being near so I couldn't really say much of anything at all and I had to talk really low....but anyways...Ryu updated today...yeah. wheeee I think he hates me or something...meh I dunno. I try not to care but it only hurts me more. well whatever...he can at least talk to Jenny if he doesn't like me anymore...She shouldn't have to lose a freind because I fucked up. Meh...Chris came over today and we had sex. It was nice. He is going to spend the night next weekend. My cousins headstone is finally up in the graveyard and Brandy wants someone to be there just in case I go schizo or something...Because it means everyhting is set in stone. Cuz is dead and not ever going to come back. He'll never call me over to his chair to give him a hug...he'll never say "Love and Peace"...he'll never be there again. But anyways...I'll be alright i think...just hope for the best I suppose. But anyways Luke is here *dances* I love my little brother. He's so awesome. I was listening to Slipknot and he made me turn it down to say one thing.." hehehehehehe I farted" He is also getting into Slipknot. But anyways this probably getting to be long...so love all of you. hugs.
~Lynnsey +_+
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Friday, January 28, 2005

   Missed the bus...
My dad is comeing to pick me up though. yay. but he sounded like he wasn't mad at me. I get to work on my art in art, which is fun because acrylic is a fun thing to work with. I did a desing which is simallar to an anime face. It was just an eye a nose and a mouth though. yayness Katie was here, *hugs her* beep. I'm tired as usual and always horny, but um thats just typical me. I tried calling Kei last night, but I think I had the wrong #...0_o I was going to call Shintoga but meh...didn't have the # with me. I am a little depressed, but I will be all right. I just need to get past all my problems and everything will be fine. I think I need to change my site around again...but I like this layout a lot. Give you a twisted look into the wa my mind thinks... I think my creative writting teacher is scared of me. heh. Well actually my table is like the depressed cutters table. lets see we have Jeff who is an x druggie and is Schizophrenic who is going out with Heather 2. Heather 2 is depressed and a cutter. Skye is a cutter and thinks the world hates her. And me. I'm just insanely random at times and then cutting myself with wire at other times...We are all good freinds though. I cheer everyone at the table up so it makes me feel good. I feel like I belong there. hehehehe Yaegermister. I say that and include it in all my stories in creative writting. I stopped useing it there for a while, now when noone says it the table of preppie chicks (and the one who says it sits behind me in Phys. Sci too ><') always says what happened to the Yaegermister?? Where is it in this story. But anyways I think I hear my dad so love all of you and I might write more at lunch...
HUGS!!!
~Lynnsey +_+
ps. hehehehe I have a great inspiration from Gackts "White Eyes" might do my novel based on my idea.
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Thursday, January 27, 2005

   tired...
wishing someone was here with me. I liked it when it was just me Freddy, David, Heather and conner sitting ner each other during lunch...but hey what ever. Whats gyoing on with all of you all?? I'm not going to screw someone thats like my mother...ewwwwww. I might try to call some of you tonight. After 9 that is. Because I'm on a cell and free mins start after then. I hope I can talk to some of you...eeep the fire buzzer is anyoning. They were working on it and it went off. annoying. meep!! I talked to Brad last night!! *happy dance* Everything seems to be all right with him, I just hope verything is all right with katie as well. I miss my Katie (not brads) she hasn' called and we have IMed in a while. I miss her sexxyness. hehehehe a couple of kids next to me are talking of FLCL. I haven't seen it in a while. Makes me wanna watch Excel saga. Well, I gotta run. But um yeah I'm horny, but depressed as usual. hugs and bai!
~Lynnsey +_+
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Wednesday, January 26, 2005

   i'm sad, yet happy.
I have been to school everyday this week!! ^^ I reneted Ftala Frame 2 and I am playing it on Nightmare mode right now, so um can you say midly hard?? Awww thanks for the comments!! hehehehehehe, I have Shintoga's # and Keis!! Meep. I will tyr to call them Friday or tomorrow...i talked a little bit to Matty last night, and lets say his comment made me think about..stuff...Things aren't so well for him right now. I hope it gets better though. Things seem to be getting worse and then better like a rollercoaster...I alos need to call Chara to at least see how she is doing...I am at lunch in school right now!! I ate a little earlier and it was good. I hope all has been good in your worlds...Kei why would people awnswer in Spanish at your house? I alos need to find the time diffrence for where Shintoga and I live and Kei and I. it would be cool to talk to Matty in person too. He probably wouldn't want too though ;_; I have a horrible accent. It sucks. I have the 4th volume of Ceres right now...well i borrowed it from Heather. it's cool. I also saw Jeff today!! He is kinda sad though (or as he says hopeless feeling) his freind Izo got hit by a drunk driver and they say he might not make it through the week. I hope he does, but if he lives he won't be able to play gituar anymore and Jeff says he's one of the best out there. Well, I leave you guys now. Damn I need to call nati...love all of you and hugs!! ^^ Byt the way I am kinda freaked out a little right now...Brandy seems to be trying to get me to join in a 3 some with her and her boyfreind!! >< >< >< ><""""""""'''''''''''' And if she teaches me how to shave...down there he said he would love to watch!! >< And he would like to see me and Brady do stuff!! ME!!! I'm a 15 year old and they are 30 something!!!!!! But anyways hope she doesn't see this and say anything...she would get mad.
hugs1
~Lynnsey +_+
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Tuesday, January 25, 2005

   Meh didn't get to court today....
My dad didn't take me in time, so I went to school. Then my mom picked me up with my dad and little brother and we ate food and it was good. Then me and my little brother, started watching G Gundam and then DBZ and then a little bit of Blue Sub 6. I wayched Kite for the 2nd time last night. I really need the unedited version of that....>< I love Sawa. She's cute, adorablbe and kicks major ass. So, no I'm not in juvy yet, but I saw a little glimpse of it and as soon as i walked in it hit me that this wasn't a good place. I had to rest for a minute because I got dizzy. Then I got dizzy at the groccery store. I alos might have to get glasses for reading. I also I have an appointment to geta whatchamacallit, but anyways it has to do with me pussy and all I can say is it that it is not guraenteed that I won't curse them out. And maybe flip them off...and some other stuff, but since this doc has no balls there are none for me to kick like last time...so um yeah. By the way I miss the little kid in my old art class calling me the anti-christ. It was fun because I would flip him out easy and it was a good laugh. he thought he had a vagina because Josh said it was another word for penis..lol. And then he told the whole class he had a vagina and i was laughing so hard lucy had to help me up. But we had an assembly today and it was FUN!! I sat with freddy and Heather and their freinds. Freddy was going to raise his hand during question and say " Uh....FUCK??" I yelled out during the thingy..." Change the scholl motto to FUCK!!!" And I was happy because the teacher didn't catch us. And when they said they were cleaning the bathrooms and i yelled out " BUT MY FUCKING ART IS IN THERE!!" It was a day of fuck, but that word is the word I love the most. Shintoga you will make fun of my stupid accent..believe me. I sometime slur my words and sound ultra stupid. But I would to talk to you sometime. I would love to talk to Kei...and I still haven't called Sinny. My life is peachy compared to a ton of others...meeh. I got food today too so me is happy. And I might get to rent Fatal frame!!! ^_^ Ok, I'm off to PM Shintoga now and anyone else who wants to talk PM me!! ^^
~Thorn Kitten +_+
ps. I now call freddy Maccaroni.
pss. hugs. I feel better. not completley but everyone says I am reverting back to my old cheerful self!! ^^ yay for me!! Tell me how goes the day with all of you. And thanks for being there for me. All of you.
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Monday, January 24, 2005

   fucking depression...
I have to go to court tomorrow over my abscences...I hate the fact that I have to be in court over something as idiotic as school. Why even go? The only true knowledge you gain is from the outside world and the only actually gaurentee in life is that we know nothing. Sorry I'm being so fucking pessimistic. Does anyone know what the fucking hell a pre-petition means?? I'm so fucking tired of this bullshit life. I want to die so bad, but it pisses everyone off when I talk about it. I have found the true definition of poser is someone who is going through life pretending everything is allright and then relaizeing that nothing will ever 'good'. I feel like that empty hole is just growing with everyday that passes. I don't feel like anything is there anymore. Noone is going to want to co-exisit with a fuck-up loser liike me. I only bring you guys down with me. I know my life is jack-shit compared to what you guys have been through. i just want to find what my freind once called 'a place in the sun'. She told me I would find it when I found true love and the day I felt good enough to stan up in and look in the mirror and say " Fuck all of you" and smile about it. A lot is going on right now, so bear with me through my depression please? I feel like no one is there anymore. All that exisits is me and my paranoia and depression. Well, i gotta run and call someone...by the way if you guys want me to call you or anything give me the #s andi'll try to since I have free long distance...
~Thorn +_+
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Sunday, January 23, 2005

   Nervous and worried.
meep. Whats going on? I'm going to try to get to some of your sites tonight...can't guarentee anything though. Chris and I just got done spending 2 nights together. It felt great to cuddle up beside someone again. But before I went to get Chris I saw Josh at the mall. Conversation went as such...

Me: *sqeauk* (it was embarrassing..-//-) "So, long time no see eh?"
Josh: " Yeah, so whats going on with you? "
Me: "oh nothing...so what about you?"
Josh: " Oh just trying to make a liveing. My car got busted up, so I'm useing my parents right now. I feel busted up."
Me: " Why ever so? "
Josh: "I'm working in construction. And teaching beginner Judo on the side for kids. "
Me: "Oh, Judo? Never saw you doing anything like that.."
Josh: "Oh, it's not like backflips or anything.."
Me: "oh...so I heard you and Anastasia broke up. Sorry to hear that."
Josh: "Oh, man that was a long time ago. Haven't been in a real relationship since. "
Me: " Well, go look for one in a bar or something. "
Josh : " Can't do that...I'm liveing with Barb and them still."
Me: " Still? "
Josh: " yeah it's hard to pay for one. It's 300 and thats a whole paycheck. "
Me: " oh...heard you wrecked your truck too. How did all that go? "
Josh: "nah it was my new car and it sucked because it was so fucking expensive."
Me: "......"
Josh: " So, what about you? You still aren't liveing in your old house right? Where are you liveing now? "
Me: *points to Brandy* " I live with Brandy now. Since cuz passed away..."
Josh: "Oh really? Sorry to hear that.."
Me: " yeah thanks.."
Josh: "so what school do you go to now? "
Me: " Karns..."
Josh: " i feel for you. Hick city. "
Me: *laugh* " Yeah tell me about it! "
Josh: " actually I do work near there. "
Me: "Man you should come see me sometime!!! *laugh*"
Josh: " Can't. parents car. "
me: "Oh, too bad. *laugh*"
Josh: " Man I've gained a lot of weight...Makes things hard when you have all this lard on you. "
Me: " awwww you are not fat! "
Josh: " Yeah right. I gotta run now. I don't feel good. It was nice talking to you though. "
Me: "Yeah like wise..."


Man....I was in such tumoil right then. I thought when I saw him I wouldn't get so nervous and shit. I thought about a lot of things in the car on the way to another store...His eyes were blue again. They change colors and it seems everythime we see each other after a while, they turn blue. He kept stareing into my eyes though...and it made me so nervous. But I loved all the time I spent with Chris!! We watched Kung Pow: Enter the Fist and that has to now be one of my favorite movies!!! IT SO RANDOM!! I talked to Sinny a little today as well. Thanks to all who read my long ass post. I missed all of you while I was away. And thanks for all the support. Naw, Kuni, I think you probably felt worse than I did. You were younger than me, so it makes it all the worse. I want tekken 5 so BAD!!! I was going to play it at the mall, but these kids wouldn't get out of the way!! I like Kunimitsu too. She's one of my best, but my all around best is Hworang and Lee. The only Tekken I offically own is Tag Tournament though.. ;_; But well tell me how all is going. Yeah kei I rember when we talked about special people...And Hinaru wasn't here...;_; But anyways I must say goodbye. Love all of you.
hugs.
~Lynnsey
ps. Meh Chara is sick!!! GET BETTER!!!
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