Tuesday, December 28, 2004

   Yay for a new wallpaper (and a new song)!
6:00 pm

So I finally made another wallpaper last night, hope you guys like it... Unfortunately, i left all my bebop dvds at my dorm room, so i can't take any new screenshots and i don't really have any pictures left i haven't already messed with in some way... Eventually, i'll buy the IY set and be able to take screencaps of that. (Won't that be exciting? Nothing but Sesshomaru from there on out lol)

So, i'm already 75% done with Warrior Within. I <3 that game... gotta make it last.

Today I have a quote from Dr. Thadeus Venture, from The Venture Brothers, episode 12: "The Trial of the Monarch.":

"Well, if I knew you could just call the cops on him, I would have done it YEARS ago! Cuz I'm no sissy, no sir, I would just pick up that phone and...'Officer, there's a man in a butterfly suit shooting my robot with a laser beam.'"

I wish i could make some wallpapers for that and sumbit them here, but i'm pretty sure they don't qualify as "anime", merely "animated." lol And if i had WW for the PC i would TOTALLY be making wallpapers of that... but *sigh*. I don't, so i can't. So many possible projects lost.

Also, I decided to finally put this really good midi file of TRFB i found like a year and a half ago (i was going to use it as a ringer for my new cell phone when i bought one, i still haven't bought one, go figure.) to use, and play it here. Yay.
Comments (0) | Permalink

Monday, December 27, 2004

   Wheee!
5:35 am

Ever just been really happy? It's rare that i'm THIS happy, so i'm trying to enjoy it while it lasts!

I must remember to mail this girl a gift certificate for Bed, Bath and Beyond since she's getting married on the 30th and i was invited but i am not going... she's only a little older than me and she's getting married! Holy crap, right? I can't believe the "Always a bridesmaid but never a bride" stage of my life is starting already. Why....

I've had one of those headaches that come with nausea all day. That sucks.

Now i should really get some sleep, cuz i need to get up at a decent hour tomorrow, wrap some gifts, and deliver them to the kids i babysit for. I'm excited to see them.

I end with this: Discuss.
Comments (0) | Permalink

Saturday, December 25, 2004

   Merry Christmas!
I had a good christmas this year! Hooray! First in way too long. I got clothes i went and picked out myself, a starbucks card, Prince of Persia: Warrior Within, Spiderman 2 for PS2 (being exchanged for Jak 3 since this was a backup if someone else got me Jak 3 - which they didn't), Kill Bill Vol. 1 and 2, Coupling Season 3 DVD, this purse i've been looking for, some nice hoop earrings with these little shiny grey stones that hang from them, another starbucks card lol, $$, and a really nice set of chopsticks and rests from the gift-swapping game we play on christmas eve. Very fun.

And now i'm off to lock myself in the basement and play PoP: Warrior Within for a little while. I have been DYING for this game. Seriously. It was all i could do to not go out and buy it myself on Nov. 30 when it came out.

Hope everyone had a great Christmas!!
Comments (0) | Permalink

Saturday, December 18, 2004

   Blah.
4:52 pm

So i got up super late even though i woke up at a somewhat decent hour considering when i went to bed (2:15) because i just didn't feel like getting up. I had to like force myself out of bed. I wish i could go back to sleep right now. I see no point to being awake right now...

I'm not even really excited about christmas. I'm just all... blah... about everything. I don't really have anything to do new years cuz i dont have a bf now... a friend invited me to do stuff with his friends, but that doesn't help at all since most of those ppl don't like me, so i'm always there just as like... "his friend we don't really like".

So last night we were talking about whether or not it's possible to die of self-loathing or a broken heart, and the fact that your body deteriorates when you are depressed was brought, and ivan jokingly asked why i wasnt dead yet. Yeah.

Does a piece of you actually die every time you get rejected? Sometimes i think it does.

Well this was a horribly depressing post. Off to get ready for finishing my website project...
Comments (0) | Permalink

I think it's time for a change.
6:24 am

Things i need to realize:
-no one is ever going to love me for me as i am currently.
-no guy is ever going to greet me with "hey beautiful" and mean it.
-i am never going to have some guy who is even remotely like the ones in the movies, i.e. think i'm beautiful, wonderful, sing love songs to me, etc.
-essentially, i need to throw away my comfortable clothes.
-i should never try to be hopeful or optimistic about things like love or guys
-i need to open up more, just so at least i know i gave it my best shot when they inevitably reject me.
-i am never going to have the guy i currently like.
-i have no purpose in life, and i doubt i ever will.
-i am forgetable, and nothing but a chore to people.

OK, i think that's enough for right now... perhaps i'll add more later.

(don't worry because of this post. it's not like i'm going to do anything drastic.)
Comments (0) | Permalink

Friday, December 17, 2004

   Should be sleeping...
5:39 am

I have an exam later today at 1:30 and i have to turn in my poetry portfolio... I should probably write like 2 more poems to at least have a hope of getting an A, but i don't really have the time. I have to finish studying for eecs. that test may very well be the death of me.

Just to share, here's a poem i wrote (i don't have to copyright this or anything, do i? lol)...

In Dreams Only

Somewhere we are together
Dancing along a midnight skyline
Icy cold stars pricking our feet
We sweep into a Paris café on a Minnesotan street
And they play us a love song
That spills from the ceiling
As a vicious liquid
An alcoholic mixture that seeps
Through our clothes and skin and into our blood
Intoxicating me like your scent
of musk and sweat and comfort
Notes drift down in clusters, perching
On the tabletops, windowsills, staring
With bright blue-black eyes
We kiss, our lips
Crushed together for a tortuously perfect moment
You run off, the wall
Opening and closing behind you
I sprint after you
Get the balance right
And lift off the ground
Clearing oceans in a bound, and mountains
In a heartbeat
Past red-eyed fanged houses and
Through dark thick trees that grow
Branches around your arms and tangle in your hair
You wait in a meadow full of daisies and silver-sharp moonlight
Stabbed into the ground like scrap metal
I fall at your feet bruised and broken
You offer a smooth hand
Help me up and hold me at arm’s length
Smiling serenely and sunrise
Behind you shines into my eyes
And slowly turns your body to vapor
That gathers on the petals, gleaming shards of metal
A condensation that quickly dries and
Leaves me sitting in bed alone as always


It actually got pretty good reviews from the teacher and the 2 students who had to review it... Um, yeah.. if you hate it.. just don't tell me lol.
OK, now i'm going to try and sleep..i have to get up in a few hours to continue studying.. yay... blah.

Comments (0) | Permalink

Monday, December 6, 2004

   I want my weekend back dammit.
I had an extremely lame weekend. It wasnt consistently lame, there were a few good parts, but the lame parts were just SUPER awful.

1) Saturday - field trip at 9 am for 8 hours. I had to get up at like 7:30. I got like 3 hours of sleep. And the entire field trip was OFF TOPIC and useless. seriously. We walked around SW detroit freezing our asses off ()for some murals that were just so-so, and the DIA stuff we looked at was not applicable at all. That just about ruined my Saturday. I was soo tired.

2) I ordered Chinese food and they fucked it up, seriously. I got 2 vegetable spring rolls, bc i am ALLERGIC to shrimp and cant get regular spring rolls. And what did they give me? spring rolls, and i didnt realize it until i had eaten 85% of the first one and i was like "hmm my throat feels funny.." looked down and saw a piece of shrimp just chilling there. Bastards. I ordered it online - meaning that they had a PRINTED copy of my order, clearly stating veg. spring roll and not reg. Gah.

3) Other bad things. Just general bad feelings.

I still have english to do, of course. Blah.

Cute song lyrics of [insert some arbitrary unit of time here]:
"Here I am I'm sitting alone again I'm staring up at the sky which at this lonely moment is my only friend suddenly as I gaze upon the night I notice the stars began to shake and dance and burst and fall into the darkness.
They exploded down. I knew what I had to do. I ran up to the top of the hill and took a hold for you.
The sweetest star that fell and yes I held on to it close to the numbness in my heart.
And I kissed a star. I wrapped it up inside a golden bow and I ran away just to find you.
This was your gift a star that I kissed.
The galaxy that lived inside your eyes was in need of a bright new shining light.
I wished to the dark sky up above that all I had was to be captured and willingly turned over to you."--"Galaxy" by Jason Mraz
Comments (0) | Permalink

Wednesday, December 1, 2004

   I'm tired.
I need to stop staying up past 4 am and then getting up at 9. It's killing me slowly. But I'm not tired at night these past few days and I don't know why...

Also, i'm really mad at how cold it is. That's me. I don't want to have to wear a winter jacket, i don't want it to be winter... *cries*

Ivan, Dan, and I are gonna watch Lock, Stock, and 2 Smoking Barrels tonight, finally!

If anyone knows of a plugin that will let me use iTunes to manage my Dell DJ, i'd be much obliged if you told me about it. I got iTunes for a specific reason, and i LOATHE Musicmatch, and the DJ explorer is a little time consuming.
Comments (0) | Permalink

Sunday, November 28, 2004

   Yay, i got some shopping done
So my long weekend was pretty nice. I did almost nothing but eat and play R&C 3. scary. I did get some shopping done... i bought little parts to few ppl's presents and main presents for 2 ppl. Hooray for eBay and target. Tomorrow i'll have to hit up steve and barry's and buy my parents' and sister's gifts. Or maybe not tomorrow.. whatever day seems the least busy. Meh.
Comments (0) | Permalink

Monday, November 22, 2004

   Oh, it's good to be bad.
So i got a temp. crown a little while ago, and i have to bleach my teeth before i can get the permanent. During this bleaching process, i'm not supposed to drink anything dark, namely: cola, tea, and coffee. I've made it about 3 days without, and just now i cracked open a frap i have in my fridge and tasted some of it's sweet, sweet goodness. Seriously, that first swallow of the forbidden coffee was like... liquid heaven. Mmmm. To be fair, i'm trying to drink it without letting it hit my front teeth, and i'm going to be brushing my teeth in a minute, so i should be ok. ^-^
Comments (0) | Permalink