Wednesday, June 8, 2005

Turned around.
Wow. I haven't written in here for ages, yeah that is my mistake but what can you really do? I'm getting old. Yeah. I've turned 17 and although that seems young, all you have to do is take a look around at all the kids and you feel old. Plus I'm officially done with school in january. Yeah. I'm an effin over achiever.

Hows the love life, you ask? Well it's not much of one. The boy I was so eagerly to be with, it didn't work out cause we never saw eachother enough. That pretty much sucked cause I havent liked a guy like that since ken. Really though, what can you do?

I'm hanging with the wrong crowd, but its hard to find good people in illinois when all you have is stoners/druggies/alcoholics. Whatever. I do what I want.

I applied for my first job but the chances of that ever happening are zilch. but I have hope.

Well I'm done with my little update, anything else is just not as important or anything. Ciao for now.
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Friday, December 24, 2004

Not Exactly...
I havent written in this journal in ages, I suppose it is my fault because I've been getting lost in so many other things. I've been neglecting all the little things, but then again I've been neglecting all the big things in my life as well.
I've neglected my friends, who matter most important to me, who always are there for me.

I've grown to become quite a person in many different aspects. My knowledge has become to be something different, I've grown with my writing ability as well in my art. I, sadly, no longer have so much of a desire to become an Animator, mostly because I don't think my skills are where they should be yet.
I think I have decided for college I am going to major in English Literature. Therefore, I will be able to be an English Professor.

The details are still quite an "Enigma" as Ken would say. I am just slowly beginning to figure all the little details out.

Do I have a boyfriend?
Yes. I Finally have a boyfriend, someone I've had my eye on for ages. Finally I made him mine. There are other issues to it though, things we have to straighten out if we are going to make this relationship work.
I am not ready to give it up yet.

Today is christmas eve.
I've become quite the Bah Humbug, with the christmas spirit lately. Hateing a good deal of things that have to do with it, hateing the time I must dedicate to my family, all the gifts that I give to people who have given to me. There are things though that make me smile, people that offered some thought to me that I was so sure forgot about my existance. It was rather nice in some aspects. I must admit that.

I've become quite the "IRL" person. I've actually become more outgoing, I found myself hanging out with friends more. I find myself doing things I havent done for years. It is nice in some aspects, but I can definately go back to how I was before, I most definately miss it.

Well that should be all for this entry, till next time i decide to update randomly again.

To say the truth, I also want to be together with you just sleeping like this.
But, I have a place that I must go, so I'm gonna go one step ahead of you.
Have a nice day.

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Sunday, September 5, 2004

haha another update so soon XD;;;
Anyhow i am keeping close tabs on my friend chris..
he's been hitting on my friends and includeing me and he has a girlfriend. so i told him he either stops right now or i'll go to his girlfriend personally and tell her, all the while i will never talk to him again.

I couldn't stand for it because he did it before and lied through his teeth to me.
he said it was a "joke" because he was bored but what tree is he smokeing? you don't do that... play with peoples emotions too
he said it was all a joke except for "me"
i was like "wtf. Whatever. don't even go there with me" --;;;

its surprising i am still friends with him after all the lieing he has done to me..
i guess i feel like i need to mold him into something..
keep him in line..
he reminds me of me when i was younger though
>___>

this is from an old entry that i was reading through what i have written.
Who would of known that a lot would have changed since then?

I think i molded him into something, something for me that is.
who would of known i'd end up seeing this guy after a year?
or let alone that the guy is my first kiss.

*falls over*
life just astounds me with its changeingness. I knew overall sooner or later i'd make him mine, not that he is totally mine.. because he lives an hour away and he is more of an irl person that talks online but doesnt do relationships online, which is good but we dont get to see eachother much :/

beyond that life is just blah with school, school likes to pick at my brain.
i am still shocked that i am a junior and life is just passing by me so quickly, only one more year.
and then i plan to get an apartment with lover boy up there XD that'll be interesting if we actually go through with it.
We had a random long talk that day to, i told him how i always wanted to have an apartment and stuff. just something about an apartment is interesting to me, i'd like to have fun buying silverwear..and just stuff for it. i know it sounds silly but bear with me, it'd be interesting also ^_^;;

uhm.. beyond that i have my license.. i turned 16.
and..

I also miss people from the past, more relationships i had with people that i dont really keep in too much of a contact with lately, like right now i am talking with britty which is nice because we are catching up on things and talking about whatever and whichever.

anyhow i am gonna get a bit lost somewhere.. its my second update in a row, just felt like updateing more.
OMG I AM ALIVE WOO!!!
go aliveness. ^^;
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oh lordy...
oh my.
I am actually going to update this somewhat, i forgot i even had this. not that anyone ever read this or even new of my existance in life.

its the normal though, you get used to people not realizing you have existed for some time.

life is interesting for me, somehow i have a stream of bad luck because first i was sick with a cold, now i have a sinus infection.. and then lifes got a few things it feels like killing me for that i wotn even get into it.

i am simply thinking that death would be so much better than living through a hell. I asked chris to kill me one day, jokingly of course, and he got all mad and was like "what the hell kind of question is that"

so that was interesting of course, as a many number of things in my life, that i would expand upon but i am sure you could give less of a though to anyways.

Anyhow.. just a little update.
enjoy <3
- Lily
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Monday, June 28, 2004

   Put a smile upon your face...
well i havent written in here much but it isnt like you guys actually missed me or even knew i existed. but pretty much a lot has changed. i am now the grand old age of 16! gasp.
yes i am grandly getting older and older each year, but i still feel like i am 13. and when i was that age i always thought that 16 we a large number.. i mean it was old. but now i am it..it doesnt feel any different than being 13, except for being able to get my license.
by the way, i also get my license tomorrow, i had to get a new social security card. and woosh.
it finaly came, now i can get my license ^_~;

besides that
last night i had a horrible dream and then.. out of nowhere i am shaken out of it.
there was a earthquake in illinois, which there never is so i find that interesting.
never the less, i am still alive and kicking.
i know you dont care =/
oh well.
ta ta for now
- Lily

[www.livejournal.com/users/twisteddisease]
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