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myOtaku.com: Rayea Kagome chan
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Welcome to my site archives. 10 posts are listed per page.
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Sunday, September 18, 2005
YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!!!!!
I GOT MY COMPUTER BACK! ^^ OH! ^^ and thank you all for your lovely suggestions to my site. I'll see what I can do. ^^
WELL!!!! This weekend has kinda sucked, but it's slowly getting better. ^^ I'm patching things up with my stepdad, slowly... He makes me yummy food, hooked up my computer again, is working with my mom to get my cell fixed, so he gets hugs... ^^ and yes! ^^ I want phone numbers so I can call ppl when it's fixed! ^^ AND!!!! I need to know when to call, time zones, and who to ask for. ^^
Neway, I'm gonna be working more on my site within the next little bit... but it depends on if my teachers back off with the work. ^^ Neway, ttyl. Avi'nala.
~Night
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Thursday, September 15, 2005
'ello Again...
So, how is everyone today?
*shrugs* I've been better. I'm a little tired, but otherwise I'm just annoyed by people who call me and I don't want to talk to them (a few things have come up between me and one of my friends... safe to say? He's become a jerk... in nicer terms. ^^)
Well, since I'm severely pressed for time today, I must be off, but I wish you all a safe and wonderful day, and I have a few questions.
1) What do you think I should add/take away/modify on my site to make it better?
2) What do you think would best suit my personality as a background pic?
If you have ideas, or if you have some pic URLs that you think I might like, feel free to email/PM them to me. *hugs to all* Later ppls.
Avi'nala.
~Night
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Wednesday, September 14, 2005
'ello....
I feel loved, and I fixed the problem with my inbox....
No, Matt, I'm not possessed, but I'm sick. If I were possessed, I'd know it because I'd be acting like she did... I'm not that bad and let's hope I don't become that way. ^^
So... how is everyone today? I feel loved, all you people care. ^^ It makes me happier to know that. I'm still a bit sad and depressed... but it's okay.... *passes out the hugs and chocolate*
Well, I don't have much to say, so I'll just be going for now. *hugs* Take care all.
Avi'nala.
~Night
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Tuesday, September 13, 2005
Just updating, nothing really....
Life is funny... people are disappearing from me again and it makes me sad. I'm in a lot of pain with certain things (most of which the damned doctors can't even figure out... and my family stopped taking me to see them, but there wasn't anything they could do to help me... *shrugs*) and it's all well and good.... I'm taking a few days to myself, might cry a bit, but either way? I'm determined to feel better....
So... how is everyone? And... Lol, sorry to disappoint you, Anime Empowerer, but I've been thinking about Halloween since this past summer with trying to figure out what I'm going to need for my costume and for the party itself.
Well, I don't want to waste anyone's time, so I'll go now.... Take care you guys.
Avi'nala.
~Night
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Friday, September 9, 2005
HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY MATT!!!!! ^^ I'm a dork (The QUEEN in fact, lol)
Lol, YES! ^^ I am thinking about Halloween already BECAUSE it's a good ways away, but it's gonna take me about a month to get everything prepared for it....
Mostly? Finishing my costume and FINDING all the things I'm gonna need for this night. ^^ Well, if any of you want me to call you and talk to you, or to be able to get in touch with you some way OTHER than internet (damn limited access)... feel free to PM me your number. I'll be sure to give you a call shortly after I receive it. ^^
WELL! I dunno.... um.... What's your favorite holiday and why?
And, Matt? *huggles* I'm going to send you something via internet on your birthday. ^^ *huggles* YAY!
Gotta run! Avi'nala.
~Night
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Thursday, September 8, 2005
Random things... Fun too...
Interesting comments the other week.... Sorry it's taken me so long to write a post... no free computers here at school (damn teachers and their essays and papers). *shrugs*
So... I liked the responses I got. The ideal friend... those of you that gave me a comment had good ones that I think everyone could agree with.
^^ I'm currently painted up like a doll. The mother gave me black liquid eye-liner (Why she encourages what she s, I dunno...) and I have two black tears coming from the corner of my right eye, and the outline of a white one from my left eye. I have red lip-stick, eye liner on the bottoms of my eyes, and white glitter framing my eyes.... It looks cool. I'll try to get a picture and show you all.
The black tears represent the tears of sadness I will not show because of an event that happened last night with one of my best guy friends. *shrugs* And the one white tear is the tear of happiness that I'll never understand. The rest just looks kewl.
Lol, so! I'm getting things ready for my Halloween Mascarade... ^^ It's so kewlies. Well, I gotta run. Ttyl guys...
Oh! What would you want to be for Hallow's Eve?
Avi'nala.
~Night
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Friday, September 2, 2005
Meh, lol...
Well, I do not intentionally "play the victim". I have people here with me at the school, and one of them wishes to type something.... If I don't like it, I'll delete it, but for now...
JP: hey, this chick rocks man, she might be into anime but she's a plus, a plus =ing hot....bye
.....I have no comment on that.... NEWAY! I'm going to try to BE HAPPIER since ppl want that.... My blood tests came back and everything looks good for now, but if I don't take care with my blood sugar, I could become diabetic. *shrugs* Neway... Well, things are... okay. I'm still sick, bruised from the needles they stuck in me, but I'm not fond of needles to begin with. No one blames me on that one, right? They aren't fun.
SO! Questions to ask... um.... What's the most ideal friend and/or companion (lack of better wording so early in the morning) you could ask for?
Ttyl... Avi'nala. ^^
~Night~
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Thursday, September 1, 2005
Fearful and Angry....
I get my blood test results back today.... And I'm leaning more towards everything being okay, but also not.... *sighs* I've had very little time to do much, and I've missed a few days of school.... I can make it up easily, but it's still scaring me....
Question to you all:
Do you think I play the victim?
I had a person I care about talk to me on that.... *sighs* They say it's natural for a person like me, but that I shouldn't do that anymore, and that I also shouldn't vent so much on my site... they want me to be happier, and right now... I'm sorry. It's not going to happen so soon. Neway, I must be off.... I hope you all are doing well. My best wishes to you all, and I'm hoping the test results come back okay... although I'm not sure my head will be fine (massive migranes and other things).
Avi'nala
~Night~
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Wednesday, August 31, 2005
Life's Sweet Sorrow and Endless Madness....
To be perfectly honest? I hate none of you... mostly you, Brosenka. A pain in my side you might have been, but yes. Your comment is correct. For all of you who did not see it, I'll post it here today.
"Everyone that reads this can hate me....but i believe you are getting what you deserve, you no longer have any of the humans or my own feelings. I could care less if you live in torment for the rest of your life for that is what you caused for the human. Live in dispair if thats what the greater ones decide for you. farewell for now and forever do not darken my halls henceforth."
You're right. I did bring this upon myself. I was not what my parents wanted of me, so it's only natural they shun what they hate. As for other things? Heh, life is too funny.... I apologize I have not been keeping up to date on MyO....
On weekends, I have no access to a computer, and I've not been to school in several days. I've been stuck with so many needles, my mother FINALLY taking me to a doctor, and no one knows what's wrong yet, if ever.... Hopefully, since they've taken blood samples, they canfinally figure this out. I will laugh myself into my grave if I have some terminal disease or something....
I do apologies for my morbid ways of thinking... I'm not well. A few of my friends have begun to close off from me, and I am wondering if it's because they see the darker side of me over what I've been showing or if they truly do not want to be near me anymore.... People close off far too often, and it's quite annoying at times....
Again, this is a morbid train of thought I was going on, so do not get angry or upset with things said.... It's truly how I felt at the point in time of writing this post. I am not saying this is how I am going to stay, but for now... I need a bit of venting.... I got rid of everything on my second computer (the one without internet and with all my stories). All my files are on backup disks at a safe house (the location of which, for safety reasons, will not be disclosed).
I do hope you all are going to be safe and well. I am tired, wishing to sleep and willing to finish a few things to get over some of this depression....
Avi'nala.
"Blessings to you who go from my heart."
~Night
PS- I'll PM my number to those who asked.
"Life's sweet sorrow and endless madness
Driving us to the brink of hellish torture
All of which we brought unto our own souls
Forever haunting us until the very demise
Aching wants and yearning needs of the heart and soul
Banished forever into hated mindless pains...."
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Friday, August 26, 2005
Venting a bit of my sorrows....
Friendship, being torn from you, feeling hollow inside.... those are my main worries now.... I seem to be the ulitimate cause of hellishness in my family's life now.... They've shown that's what it is too... and not in a subtle sense.... I feel so hollow, so empty in my soul, and I've been this way for weeks now.... I hide it, no one wants to know, no one I could talk to, so I've hidden it.... It hurts... it hurts so much to feel so hollow, to be in a house full of people and yet feel so alone because you're so far away from those you want to be with.... I seem selfish to want the one thing I know will make me happiest, but it's only fair. I get what I deserve for being so horrible to so many for most of my life.... I'm meant to live in this world a cruel fate of demonic hatred and in the fury and loathing of those I love because I am getting what I so deserve.... I'm the cause of so many problems in my family, and it's so horrible to feel this way....
I've talked to others about the hollow issue, but it's not helping... the more I talk to those I love, the more hollow it feels... then a friend hurt me emotionally last night.... it made a huge void, but I told them no matter what they want (my friendship or not) I'm always going to be here for them.... That's true for any of you and for all those I cannot be with....
I'll give you guys my cell number if you want, via PM, and if you could, give me your number so I can call you sometimes....
I have a feeling I'm going to be crying a lot today....
I must be off.... Blessed be.
~Night
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