myOtaku.com: Rayea Kagome chan

myO Still <3's You

Vitals

Gender
• Female
Location
• Where ever I happen to choose at the time.
Member Since
• 2004-06-18
Occupation
• Writer
Real Name
• Night

Personal

Achievements
• Depends on what you'd call an acheivement....
Anime Fan Since
• A long time, hard to say from wence it all started...
Favorite Anime
• Most any and all anime.
Goals
• Another secret for me to know and you to not.
Hobbies
• To sing, write (be it poetry or my stories), involving myself in my art, and my music (be it writing my songs and putting them to music or playing any random thing and listening to my CDs), also my artistic works.
Talents
• Oh, it'd make it so much more interesting to speak to me in person about that.

myOtaku.com: Rayea Kagome chan

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Depression, Heartache.... all all the stuff that goes with it..... and self hate......
I still feel cold, empty, and alone... I felt so angered after I was so calm, and I honest to God lodt my cool, I'll admit. Then... I wanted to end everything, to throw away all that I might have had or that I've had happen to me so far.... and then.... then I was so upset, I broke down and was finally able to cry, when I didn't want to.... But I had my friend Chris, and Demetre on the phone.... and they helped me to not do andthing rash or drastic.... they started to make me feel better, but.... right now? I think it'd be best if I just left everything alone and heal... I'll vent in anyway I need, and I shall even block off my emotions if need be.... *sigh* It seems I have the worst time trying to find someone whose willing to be there for me and who won't leave me because of things they cannot help..... It's always the same... they open up to me, I open up to them, I find a guy whose great and he leaves.... *hits head into the nearest wall* I'm fed up with it, and I'm frustrated to hell and back... *sigh* Why can I not find someone who won't do that to me? I always promise I'll wait, that I need to and that it'll all be better when they do come back.... they never do, and I close off once more to the world.....

Wow, I'm pathtic! Lol, I should stop.... I'm gonna go envelope myself within some cookies, Anime, and possibly a few sad country love songs and sing and all or whatever, lol. *sigh* I hope everyone else is a lot better off than I... Ttyl.... Ja.

PS!!!- FORGOT TO ADD THIS!!! can't read responses until later on, or until I figure out what's up with this damn computer, but it's not letting me read them... but, I'll find a way, lol. Ja ne!
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