Sunday, November 21, 2004

   *yawns*
I stayed up till 2 last night watching the last of hellsing. I didn't get to watch the last two episodes though *sobs*. I was randomly pounced by a cat that wasn't mine today. It was odd....^_^

I bought stuff today! ^_^

I know this may sound childish but i bought a bratz doll *winces* It's really cool though ^_^ She looks loike mana! With the blue and blonde hair and the really weird yet cool outfit that's frilly and black ^_^ I also got a weird painting thingie of a kimono. It looks really cool.


I found out my sister's three months pregnant. It's crazy, she's havin those weird cravings and always has gas. Even though she's only three months in...-_-

I'm goin over to mari's tomorrow to meet greg.....the really hot guy with an irish accent...^_^ I ish so happy! We're goin to border's and i'll be able to buy paradise kiss. Well i'm sorry but i gotta go do stuff so...ja ne!
-sam




The Dollmage is the wise woman of Seekvalley. Her gift and power is to make the story of her village because she alone makes the "doll," or miniature of her village. She also makes the "promise doll" for each child born in the village. The promise doll, a small totem worn around the neck, tells the promise of each individual's life.



As the Dollmage's powers weaken and age comes upon her, she knows she must choose a successor. On the day she predicts to be the birthday of her chosen one, two girls are born: Annakey and Renoa. One girl must learn the Dollmage's magic, but which one? The Dollmage does something that has never been done before. She sculpts both girls' promise dolls with the eyes of the Dollmage, but on one doll she carves a smile and on the other a frown. She allows the babies to choose. Annakey chooses the frowning doll, and Renoa the smiling doll. Their paths seem clear. Renoa will be the Dollmage.



But as Annakey grows up, she discovers that she, too, has magic. She longs to create in miniature and desires with all her heart to be a Dollmage. She is forbidden, she is told. She has the frowning promise doll with all its terrible implications.



When Annakey's valley is threatened by outside forces, she is the only one with a plan to save her people. How will she persuade the Dollmage and her people that she has the power to help?



In this richly woven tale of the frightful effects of love, pride, and bitterness, Martine Leavitt once again crafts a fantastic and completely believable alternate world. This is a story that grows in power as each page turns.
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Friday, November 19, 2004

Character Spotlight!!


Name Nagi Naoe
Origin Weiß Kreuz
Age 15
Nationality Japanese
Hair Brown
Eyes Purple
Occupation Assassin, student
Abilities Telekinesis

Free description

He's the youngest member of Schwarz, and little is known about him. He apparently lived on the streets, and was helped by Brad Crawford, leader of Schwarz and rumored to be his father. In love (or at least has a huge crush on) Tot, a member of a rival assassin group.


I really think nagi is a cute character. He kinda freaks out and kills a bunch of people after tot "dies" but comes back to "life" ^_^
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I'm sad
I woke up wtih a runny nose. By the time of second hour i was coughing out organs. I feel like shit....-_-.
Lately i've been uber paranoid and stuff....*shrugs* prolly cause i'm goin through new changes and all...
I had to buy three new bras today. I've been growing like a weed. I put on my fave one and it snapped on me and ripped in the cup...*sobs*

Hey purga....wanna help me fix my support? LOL jk..

AISHITERU PURGA-SAMA! i heart purga....because i hear purga imma make purga a heart sign!!



Anywho.....>.> <.<

I stol christian's hoodie today. I was really cold and i like ripped it off of him...He chased me around the quad ^_^ well i'm really tired and lazy so i think i'll just copy this down...

Romance, who loves to nod and sing,
With drowsy head and folded wing,
Among the green leaves as they shake
Far down within some shadowy lake,
To me a painted paroquet
Hath been- a most familiar bird-
Taught me my alphabet to say-
To lisp my very earliest word
While in the wild wood I did lie,
A child- with a most knowing eye.

Of late, eternal Condor years
So shake the very Heaven on high
With tumult as they thunder by,
I have no time for idle cares
Through gazing on the unquiet sky.
And when an hour with calmer wings
Its down upon my spirit flings-
That little time with lyre and rhyme
To while away- forbidden things!
My heart would feel to be a crime
Unless it trembled with the strings.
-edgar allen poe...Romance

Ah, broken is the golden bowl! the spirit flown forever!
Let the bell toll!- a saintly soul floats on the Stygian river;
And, Guy de Vere, hast thou no tear?- weep now or nevermore!
See! on yon drear and rigid bier low lies thy love, Lenore!
Come! let the burial rite be read- the funeral song be sung!-
An anthem for the queenliest dead that ever died so young-
A dirge for her the doubly dead in that she died so young.

"Wretches! ye loved her for her wealth and hated her for her pride,
And when she fell in feeble health, ye blessed her- that she died!
How shall the ritual, then, be read?- the requiem how be sung
By you- by yours, the evil eye,- by yours, the slanderous tongue
That did to death the innocence that died, and died so young?"

Peccavimus; but rave not thus! and let a Sabbath song
Go up to God so solemnly the dead may feel no wrong.
The sweet Lenore hath "gone before," with Hope, that flew beside,
Leaving thee wild for the dear child that should have been thy
bride.
For her, the fair and debonair, that now so lowly lies,
The life upon her yellow hair but not within her eyes
The life still there, upon her hair- the death upon her eyes.

"Avaunt! avaunt! from fiends below, the indignant ghost is riven-
From Hell unto a high estate far up within the Heaven-
From grief and groan, to a golden throne, beside the King of
Heaven!
Let no bell toll, then,- lest her soul, amid its hallowed mirth,
Should catch the note as it doth float up from the damned Earth!
And I!- to-night my heart is light!- no dirge will I upraise,
But waft the angel on her flight with a Paean of old days!"
_Edgar Allen Poe
Lenore

I am currently reading

Cut - Patricia McCormick

Callie cuts herself. Never too deep, never enough to die. But enough to feel the pain. Enough to feel the scream inside. Now she's at Sea Pines, a "residential treatment facility" filled with girls struggling with problems of their own. Callie doesn't want to have anything to do with them. She doesn't want to have anything to do with anyone. She won't even speak. But Callie can only stay silent for so long. . .

That's a good book. Well my dad's trying to get me to eat somethin so i might as well sympathasize wqith him. I'll post a snippit of writing later on today! ja ne!
-sam
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   boobies
When i walk down my stairs my tits bounce...lol sorry i just had to post that. Thanks for all the nice comments on my piccy! ^_^ Imma try to get a more recent one...i have chubby cheeks T_T need to go on a diet *sobs sobs* Well hinaru returned finaly! I welcome him back with a sepcial greeting!




Well i'm reaaaaaaaaaally tired so i guess i'll go to sleep! JA NE!
-sam

(ps: Sailor mars is hot...i mean like....orgasmic...I wish i looked like her T_T
)
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Thursday, November 18, 2004

   Thankies ^_^
Wow, thanks for all the comments on the piccy and stuff guys. Well today was another off-day. We finished our exams and the rest of the day was squat. Brandon finally showed up after disappearing for like half the week. *Shrugs* well i have alot to do and stuff...YA hinaru is back...i dunno why that's a big deal but purga called me sexy! ^______^ even though that's an old piccy from when i used to pose for this one store...well gots to split! ja ne!

Q: What color is YOUR hair?

-sam
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   Finger
I burnt my fucker finger! *sobs* it's my fave one....i guess that's what i get with screwin around with a lighter. BUT I WAS ONLY TRYING TO LIGHT A CANDLE!!!!!!! *sobs*

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Moderate
Schizoid:	Moderate
Schizotypal:	High
Antisocial:	High
Borderline:	Very High
Histrionic:	High
Narcissistic:	High
Avoidant:	Moderate
Dependent:	High
Obsessive-Compulsive:	High
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --

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Wednesday, November 17, 2004

   why...?
My friggen grandfolks are in town. now i have to be perfect and nice for them so they don't think i need to be sent to some random shrink like they did last time. They just can't accept andything about me is all. They blame it all on my mother wich makes me hate them even more> i know it's completely wrong to hate your grandparents but come on! gawd.....anywho...Well i'm talking to kristina on the phone. Another problem once again...-_-


After school i went to gameworl, wich is prolly why my hair smells like insense! I bought a chi, yuki, kyo, shigure, and piyoko pins! They're so cute...!!!!


My exams suck! i got my report card back! Good grades ^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^!!!
I also got poster board for jovi, green and black! good color combination! ^_^




Adorable mana-sama! I wanna jump his fuggin bones! *squeal!*

well imma go, i gotta read thanatos...JA NE!

-sam


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   pfft
I had another weird day. Yes exams are finally taking place and it's crazy. I have like absolutely NO homework and it's not as good as i thought it would be...*shrugs* well i finish tokyo mew mew #6 i can't wait to read 7! ^_^ i hate ichigo though, too much of a mary-sue. But on more recent nres, i bought the entire hellsing series....and watched it all.....^_^ Ahhhhhhhhhh alucard you are so hot.*drool* i swear if i ever met anyone like alu-sama i'd prolly stalk to lucky ass mudda fucka! lol (was making fun of hip hoppers at my school)

I NEARLY GOT HIT BY A CAR TODAY T_T!


It was scary *sobs* The fuckin bastard though i was a cat! (like= it's good to hit a cat -_-U) I visited Kristie and it turns out her mother doesn't want her speaking with me because i collect swords...-_- yeah like that's a "bad" thing...*shrugs* well this might be a shorter post cause i gotta get on gaia and do all the good stuff. I dyed my hair black over the weekend! ^_^


My mom's gonna break up with my dad soon, she's takin me and movin closer to Kristina....(my bestfriend from the sixth grade) Mom person also baught me soft drink (it's like some asian yogurt beverage....weird...-_-) well i gotta go! Ja ne!

Question of the day: What's YOUR fave color!?!? (how cliche`)

<-------------O_O!!uhmm...i didn't....do it...>.> <.< (they're watching me!)

I wish i got to keep that damned outfit...*growls* it looks so pretty *sobs*

(p.s: even though my mom's hella tan and so is my dad....i'm like....really pale....it's kinda sad T_T....but i like looking like a ghost!)
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Saturday, November 13, 2004

   Character Spotlight!
This Weekends Character Spotlight goes to Riho!!!



age: 18
eye color: Green
Hair color: Brown
Height: 5'2''
Species: Vampire

Riho Yamazaki's parents were killed as a result of a nightbreed attack. Alone in the world, she became the ward of Tatsuhiko Shido, as well as his secretary. Riho has a big crush on Shido, and is often jealous of Yayoi's attentions, and has become the target of Guni's taunts because of her often naïve nature. At first, Riho is unaware that Shido is a vampire, but even after she found out, she stayed on.

Later, on another case, Riho was seriously injured by Cain, when he cut her and left her to bleed to death. As the life was ebbing from her, Riho asked Shido to drink her blood, knowing that she would become a vampire as a result. Shido complied reluctantly.

Now a vampire herself, Riho now aids Shido in his quest to rid man from the threat of the nightbreeds. Her powers are just the same as Shido and Cain. However, due to her inexperience, Riho is not as adept as them. Despite this, she retains her optimistic outlook at life – as well as making a terrific cup of coffee.
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   Tears
What do you think of a person who is grateful for tears? Crazy perhaps? Insane? Demented? Emo? Perhaps? Who knows, all i know is that for the first time, i have never felt more free in a sense... It's been two weeks since i last shed tears, and i've felt enclosed. Like i was gonna snap and anytime. I do have to admit, i'm being some stupid lil emo bitch right now but i just don't care. I need to get this out one way or another. That's what i said to myself earlier. Too many times have i hidden the fact that i cry, from certain people that is. In example...my best friend, Anunya kuyla Zeigler, I've been friend's with her for three years. We're closer than anything else right now, but before we weren't as close. Tonight i finally gathered up all the courage to call her while i was balling my eyes out. When i called her i started the conversation that we would usually have "Hey anna, what did you do today?" Well it went along the lines of that for about ten seconds. Then she stopped and asked me if i was crying. Then that broke into me confessing every last thing that i've kept hidden from her. What exactly happened between me and my last boyfriend. How i've had odd fasinations about this one girl. And how i feel about one person. She couldn't help me with my problems, and i was aware of that when i told her them. It was just good to get them out and tell her. In truth, i'm a somewhat enclosed person when it comes to my friends. They usually have the visionary of me being a somewhat hyperactive crazy person who has everything and anything she could possibly want or desire. But that would be exactly what i would want. I'm more of a sad emo fucker who's just downright angry and wants everything and can't have anything. I'm selfish, hateful, i hold grudges for too long, and i'm a liar. I'm not a very good person and that's something i can accept. But what really gets to me the most is, i have low self confidence for some things. I never really ever recall me being able to tell someone something embarassing about myself without regretting saying it. It makes me dizzy sometimes, and i hate it. But more onto the important factor. What i want the most, is to be able to tell everyone everything freely. How i feel about people, how i'd feel about a certain person. Anything like that, i know it's a tad bit chilche` but i feel like this is the situation where "we're just friends and that's all he/she wants.....to be JUST friends." I want to be more than JUST friends, something that i'm sure i'm far form but it doesn't matter anymore. I might as well obsess over that one model.....even though she can be a real bitch...-_-U

I'm really tired. I've been uber cold for the past three days. Not just cause of the weather i think there's somethin wrong with me. I mean i'm a mammal i'm s'pose to own some type of consistant body tempature that's like room tempature isn't it? But i've been really really really hella cold. It's like i'm dead or sumthin...I've gotten pale too! It's not like i wasn't before. But i look like some type of ghost. Who knows maybe it's cause i dyed my hair black *groans* I was hitting deep blue but my hair was too dark a color to begin with. I've been really worried about all of my friend's lately. Anna has ringworm so i'm nailing her ass about wearing sunblock all the time. Kristie keeps on getting in trouble because of me. I dunno, her dad's just some stick up the ass hick who's used to god praising yound ladies and it's a nail in his ass to see some raver bitch like me or sumthin. I've also been really pissed because i haven't spoken to michael in forever and whenever i do get to speak to him he's tired or sumthin and doesn't wanna talk. Sha-chan's worrying me too. I haven't spoken to her since the 5th and all so i'm worried. I can never get ahold of her or anything so i can't see how's she's doing...
Kristie's older sister is in love with geoff...*sneer* It pisses me off because i didn't wanna hear about him since the last thing he did to one of my friends. But now Cassie has to remind me of how he can be such a good guy and what not. Not something i wanna think about. OMIGAWD! I love kristie's brother Daren, he's like some huge anime fan with friggen cowboy bebop and samurai x posters covering his walls. He has a wooden sword and like three katana sets. I saw a katakana work sheet in his room wich sort of surprised me. He was wearing a pair of Sha-chan's bondage pants. The red and black one's with the bolt chains. I tugged on the chains and he just cocked his head to side an mumbled "Oro?". He's so nice ^_^ But he's always tired...*sniffs*
I finally have something on my children but i'm too lazy to post it ^_^U.

I think i made my mom cry or sumthin. It's cause i dyed my hair and now she thinks i'm some depressed emo fag or sumthin. She complained about how my god loving grandma who's been missing for 8 years of my life is gonna shit a brick when she sees me and all that good stuff. I don't care...*shrugs*
I got to visit Brandon....finally! He brought his snake to school and didn't get busted until after school was over. So now he has a 5 day weekend the lucky bastard. He scared the livin shit out of me with his ferrets. They crawled up my pant legs *shiver* but they were cute. I also got to see a picture of Tyler (his boyfriend) he's damned hot! Brandon says i'm the female version of Tyler and Albert ^_^. Wich is odd but anywho, bradon's mom looks just like angelina jolee (or whatever her name is) she's fuggin hot!
I got into a fight at school, verbal arguement and my parents threaten to send me to kentucky for some quality time with the old shits. *shudder* I got into a fight with some bitch named Tanesha...she had a problem with my bisexuality and i told her that she could just shove it because saying you have a problem with gays is like saying you have a problem with fuggin asians and black people. She just looked at me like i was crazy and made some fucked up remark about christianity and that i should look into it. After that it ended up in me screaming to her what the defenition of "diversity" was. Fuckin hip hopping bitches. They really do piss me off, so enclosed in their own little reality about how they're good people because they believe in god. But they really aren't good people because they have bad qualities and moral that are as shallow as the kiddy pool in my old apartment complexities.


Well i think imma go, i wanna get a utena BG! ^_^

-sam
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