Wednesday, March 7, 2007

progress report: i am missing you to death

feeling: clean music: camisado-panic! @ the disco hi, some comments from yesterday: uh just in case i made it sound like it i am not happy that danny and his girlfriend are breaking up. i was applauding danny for making his relationship last a month. oh and magnus lol i wish i had a pic of panic! in their underwear XD in case anyone was wondering about why my subjects are getting more and more random it's because i've been and still am using bits from songs. mostly fob or panic! songs or just whatever happens to be in my mind at the time. i am almost 95% sure that danny got me sick! it's too odd that he was really sick last week and now i feel sick as well. darn you danny! *shakes fist at him* i keep forgetting to mention this but the myo user playitbakinslomo is drawing the characters for my story "my friend rory" from what we talked about her ideas are really great and i can't wait till she's done! *hugs for her* just ten minutes ago i was eating some kfc paticularly coleslaw and while i was eating it a good amount fell off my fork and onto my pants so yeah my pants smelt like cabage. i don't think i ever mentioned this but i happen to have a slight case of o.c.d for anyone who doesn't know o.c.d is obsessive complusive disorder. i'm not full blown ocd but i do have ocd tendencies. the funny thing about this is that no one believes me when i tell them that i have it not even my bestfriend! weird yes? well it is wednesday and that means it's time for REDMOONCHICK'S MANGA REVIEW EDITION # 10 todays manga is "vampire knight" and it is the story of yuki cross a girl who goes to cross academy and happens to be a guardian as well as a student. at cross academy there is a day class and a night class and the school secret is that the night class is full of vampires. now it's up to yuki and fellow student/guardian zero to keep the day class from knowing the night classes secret. i love this manga! the art is so beautiful and the characters are funny and each one has their own personality. for the girls the vampire boys from the night class are very pretty and for the boys well yuki isn't hard on the eyes either. the story is addictive as hell hooking you from the start; with it's vampire politics and the characters internal struggles. "vampire knight" is currently being serialized by shojo beat so if your impatient you can catch a chapter each month, although volume one is out now and i believe volume two is due in may. bottom line is that i believe that vampire knight has what it takes to be the next big thing and if you like gorgeous artwork, good storyline, and vampires then "vampire knight" is definitly for you. redmoonchick gives vampire knight 9 out of 10 vampire knight volume one ~redmoonchick~

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Tuesday, March 6, 2007

there's too much green to feel blue

mood: tired music: take over the breaks over-fall out boy currently: avoiding my brothers attacks hi, something funny happened to me lastnight after i updated. my brother and i got into one of those play fights that sorta turn real. i'm not really sure how it started but we were messing with each other and just playing around like making fun of each other and what not; but one of the greatest parts of our fight was when my bro was threating me with a bottle in our kitchen and i was standing next to our cupboard, so my brother steps foward and like the ninja that i am i threw open the cupboard door harder then i ment to and "bam" it smacked my bro in the face and he was all like 0.0 then later we were fighting in the bathroom and i grabbed the powder and poured some into my hand and threw it at my brother and he was mad so he grabbed our can of air freshener and he sprayed me with it getting it right in my freshly washed hair! needless to say i was pissed because i hate our air freshener and now i smelt just like it, so i grabbed it away from him and sprayed his hair too. then i was trying to wash the odor from my hair with a washcloth so my bro grabs the wash cloth and wrings it out while i'm holding it so my clothes get all wet! for that i grabbed his hair and was pulling it and he tried to bite me. well we went on like this for quite some time but it's not too interesting. well at school today i talked to danny and he informed me that he is finding his girlfriend very annoying and that he wants to break up with her soon. i must say i'm not too surprised but this is the longest relationship danny has been in since i've met him so go danny! *thumbs up* it's extra funny as well because today is their one month anniversary and danny is planning as far as i know to break up with her sometime this week. i just found out today that my school schedule is being messed with again but i must say that it's in my favor this time. we don't have school on friday and next week all the juniors have to take a state wide test or something so everyone who isn't a junior doesn't have to go to school on tuesday and then on wednesday and thursday we're having half days (again except for the juniors) the only good thing for the juniors is that they don't have to come to school next friday but the rest of the school is going on a field trip so it doesn't really matter. basiclly it sucks to be a junior right now. my brother and i also got into a somewhat interesting conversation. it was about my love for the band panic! @ the disco and how i thought their lead singer brendan was hot, well this happens to be the same lead singer i said danny looks like so my brother said by default i was saying that i think danny is hot. he's not the first person to bring this up i think even danny himself said something along those lines back in first semester, but i never really thought about it! XDi guess you could say that it is what i'm saying except it's not, i don't know maybe i know how to keep them seperated in my mind? panic! in case anyone was wondering who they were yeah fall out boy wet and in their underwear just cause i felt like it! *evil laugh* ~redmoonchick~

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Monday, March 5, 2007

your crashing but your no wave

mood: happy music: don't you know who i think i am?- FOB hi, i'm sure you all remember on friday when i said i was going to my bestfriends smoke party well no worries people because i didn't go. to be exact there was no party to go to. apparently my bestfriend couldn't come up with the money to buy the drugs so yeah no smoke party. well i didn't go to school on friday so i got around one and checked my brother's cell phone and saw that we got a text from danny that said call him, so i told my brother and he did but my brother didn't talk to danny for very long and i ended up doing it. yeah it felt good to talk to danny after a week of not seeing him everyday. well danny told us on the phone that he was too sick to play at the church and that he was just going to go home and go to bed (he really did sound sick), so yeah after that i was suppose to go and spend the weekend with my bestfriend but really i didn't want to and the roads were pretty bad we almost slid off the road, so my mom said i couldn't stay but i did get the new issues of shojo beat and anime insider. well not much else happened after that. i mostly played around on myo on saturday and signed some guestbooks, speaking of guestbooks i had 210 when i went to bed lastnight and when i woke up i only had 209 so someone deleted a sig and it didn't bug me too much what did bug me was that i couldn't figure out who it was. well anyway i got on to update and now i have 211 signings and thank you to anime anime girl for being my 210th signature! also on my site i broke my comments record again thanks to you guys! my new record is 21 comments! *hugs for you all* oh and i deleted some more people off my list but it's only people who have never visited me and i changed my wallpaper again it's still vampire knight but it's a different one made by jaguar! oh and on friday i seemed to accidently put myself in a love triangle! XD not really but it was like one. what went down was that i talk about the myo user hoaryu a lot but only because i consider him a very good friend here on the myo, now hoaryu's girl angel zakuro left me a threathening comment! XD she was only joking i hope! XD ok well nothing serious just thought it was a semi funny story! i know this post is running on the long side but i'm almost done. i finally finished writing my story "my friend rory" and it's so good! now all that's left is to keep posting it on here. also after keeping my two girl cats for three months my cousin brought them back on saturday and needless to say my two boy cats weren't thrilled about it! now every cat in the house is freaking out and my big boy cat keeps trying to rape the little girl cat and the big girl cat has been hiding all day, so i don't know what the hell happened to them! well that is all for now! i apologize about the longness! ~redmoonchick~

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Friday, March 2, 2007

the lies i weave are oh so intricate

mood: comfy music: i wrote this song-dave chappelle hi, well i didn't go to school yesterday, i really didn't have a reason i just didn't go but it's alright. danny didn't go to school either but he did update his myo yesterday and said that he was finally better. i'm glad that he's better because today his band is suppose to be playing at this church thing at least they were suppose to but as far as i know it's still on. danny's band is called from the ashes and their a heavt metal christian rock group. i really hope his band is still playing cause i think it'd be so cool to watch him perform, he plays the guitar and does a few vocals. nothing else is going on, thank you's are in order for all of you who read my story yesterday and left such kind comments for me. even hoaryu and knights edge who both PM me to tell me how much they enjoyed it! *hugs for all* like i said it's in one of my older posts my bestfriend is having her birthday party this weekend and it is the smoke party. i don't plan on smoking but my friends do like to catch me off guard and blow smoke in my face when i'm not expecting it. so i can't say that i won't get a contact high. question for you all: can you guys see the song in my profile? cause i can see it at home but not at school and the same for my friend danielle so i was just wondering if you guys can see it? lol moonlessdaemon and em0taku(danny) win the award for best comments yesterday both of which made me laugh. *hands them plastic throphies* i've been on a bit of a vampire kick lately, duh just check out my new theme! XD well i attribute this to me reading the vampire knight manga and also watching the fob video in which pete is a vampire who fights and kills other vampires! yes it is awesome! ok i don't have anything else to say so this is the last post of the week! unless something really important happens to me during the weekend. so i guess i'll see you all on monday! vampire pete is friggen hot! (see moonlessdaemon pete is back! lol) patrick for danny vampire knight ~redmoonchick~

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Thursday, March 1, 2007

headlines and flash, flash, flash photography

mood: slightly annoyed listening to: my brother playing his xbox and my mom on the phone hi, wow first off i wanna say thank you all! you all helped me break my comments record! now the new record is 18 comments! so thank you all so much! *hugs for all* also i am pretty proud of myself for getting to mostly everyone on my friends list! well at least people who updated before 5:30 oh also it is now march and i have changed my layout! *sigh* fall out boy theme i shall miss you. well my new theme is the manga vampire knight. it's a manga that's running in shojo beat magazine. the wallpaper i have up is made by the myo user amriisuwre. ha i made the mistake of thinking jaguar made it so sorry jaguar-sama! don't be mad that i didn't use your wallpaper! ok so school was a little boring today because as i predicted danny didn't come to school but he is really sick so everyone send their well wishes to danny! like i said nothing really happened our senior class went on a field trip to a college today so my yoga teacher wasn't there. i ended up skipping yoga because we were had a british subsitute and he can't do yoga so we were gonna play volleyball instead, now i'm not so great at volleyball it brings up bad memories and i wasn't too keen on being yelled at in british so yeah i skipped. oh and at school there is this kid named jordan who keeps asking me to take his cigarettes home with me everyday so his mom won't find them. oh and speaking of school we were eating lunch today and us girls can be so catty when we all get together. like it was me, two seniors,and my sorta friend torri and well everyone starts gossiping about other girls at our school even people who are their friends. i wasn't gossiping but i found it funny to listen to. speaking of torri she is being a total bitch again just like last semester when we weren't getting along. because today in my 6th hour i was talking to this guy named kyle and he's friends with torri and i mentioned danny and kyle goes "hey don't you like danny?" and i'm like "um no" but he corrected himself by saying that it was my friend danielle who like danny and i asked him how he knew about that and he said torri told him, he also happened to know who i used to like and i asked him how he knew that and he said torri told him again. so yeah torri is back to her two face ways. ok so today is thursday and that means a new chapter to my story but before i post that i wanted to ask you guys a question: does anyone feel like drawing me some character designs for the characters of my story? i could do it but my art leaves much to be desired in my eyes. well pm me if your interested. once again if you are new to my site and want to catch up on the story or have missed a part you can find all the lastest chapters at the myo site redmoonchick2 "my friend rory" chapter six: twelve twenty five: the bell tolls for thee i looked down quickly seeing my leg seeping with blood. the wound was just below my knee and unbearably painfull. rory gasped with pain and dropped to his knees breathing harshly; my kick either wasn't as strong as i thought or rory was determined to go on despite his pain; either way he managed to stand but was still unable to move. i was laying half on my back my one hand reaching down to hold my wound; which was now bleeding profusely my other hand was the only thing supporting me as i sat on the cold white floor. my well placed kick had caused rory to once again drop his weapon causing it to slide somewhere that i couldn't see. i could still hear rory breathing and gasping in pain but i myself was in too much pain to notice what exactly it was that he was doing. my hand had become slimey and wet from my blood and i was beginning to feel nauseous and slightly dizzy. "y-you see no-now layla?" i heard rory stutter; i opened my eyes which i didn't remember closing and looked at him "you made me shoot you. now your gonna bleed to death" he said coldly to me. at this point i began to believe rory and my hope for seeing tomorrow was fading more and more with each drop of blood that spilled from me. "now where's my gun?" he asked looking around; it was then that rory and i both noticed that the boy who had helped me take down rory was still standing there next to us; he was just watching almost like he was transfixed on the situation. i followed the boys gaze and realized that he wasn't just staring at the scene before him; he had spotted rory's gun on the floor. rory seemed to realize this too as his own eyes followed the mystery boys gaze; "ah ha there it is" rory said smugly he seemed to have regained his composure. the gun lay a good few feet down the hall near the boys bathroom door; it just lay there like an unfound treasure and whoever wielded it would have the power. there was a moment of silence and stillness as neither of the teens made a break for the gun and i was unsure if my companion would even try; maybe he wouldn't out of fear of ending up like me. after a moment both boys seemed to come to their senses and without looking at one another both of them took off instantly,both of them racing towards the gun. it was odd as i watched them race one another; it was strange and demented that the lives of countless people hung in the balance of who would win in a simple foot race. the mystery boy reached the gun first. he dived and swipped it up from the floor. before the boy could do much damage with it, rory had leaped onto his back. it was now the boy's turn to fight off rory's advances for the weapon. rory grabbed a handful of the boy's black hair forcing his head back. while his left hand was burried in the boys hair, rory's free hand grabbed the boy's left arm, while the boy held the gun in his right hand. i could see from where i was still seated on the floor that the both rory and the boy were wearing out in their battle, but it seemed that the mystery boy was losing energy quicker then rory was. i was afraid that maybe the gun would go off again and that maybe i would be shot fatally this time, but i knew the boy needed my help, if he was risking his own life to save his classmates then i should be able to risk my own life to save him. being unable to walk i wasn't sure what it was i could do, but i had to try. with my one good leg i managed to begin to push myself backwards towards the white pristine lockers that lined the hall. i noticed as i pushed myself scooting ever backwards toward the lockers, that i was leaving large red smudges of blood as my shot leg moved along uselessly. the fear of bleeding to death was intensified even more in my head but still i continued knowing that if i didn't help the boy no one else would. once my back had hit the lockers i stopped for a moment breathing heavily and grasping my leg which was now throbbing in pain. i glanced toward the struggling boys and noticed that little about the situation had change. the two boys were still a good distance away and i wasn't sure if i could manage to make it all the way to them. i began moving once again, this time slidding across the wall slowly. i had only reached about half way when the fight escalated. "you can-can't wi-win rory" the boy gasped out his head and arm still being pulled back by rory. "whose gonna stop me now? you?" rory asked the boy mockingly. "the only way you'll be able to stop me is if you shoot me and in the position i have you in now, the only way you can shoot me is if you shoot yourself!" rory laughed. as i heard this exchange an anger burned within me, anger at rory, at the boy, at the cops, at the other students and teacher that sat a mere classroom away yet offered no help, and i was angry at myself for being so weak. by now the boys had moved from infront of the bathroom door to infront of the janitors closet which was located just a few inches from the bathroom. "fine rory" i heard the boy say, i was confused by his words and i could tell rory was too by the "huh?" he let out. before i could say or do anything to stop him, the boy held the gun tight in his right hand bringing it close to himself. he pressed the gun to his shoulder and pulled the trigger. a shot echoed throughout the hall. i had only realized after the shot had rung out that i had been screaming "no!". i also heard both boys scream in pain and i knew what the boy had done. rory and the boy's own arm had been almost perfectly aligned, so when the boy shot through his shoulder he also hit rory's arm. after he had been shot rory released the boy's left arm and clutched his own now injured arm. this was all the opportunity that the boy needed, even though he was injured himself, he took rory's momentary lapse in the battle as a opportunity to knock him into the janitor's closet door. somehow the boy had turned onto his back and shoved rory into the door. instead of rory just hitting the door like the boy and i had expected, the door gave way and rory fell into the darkness of the closet. i assumed rory was knocked unconcious and called to the boy "are you okay?" i asked still breathing heavily sweat causing my hair to stick to my forehead. "ye-yeah i think so" the boy panted out from across the room. it was all over i thought happily rory was unconcious and now the cops could come in and rescue everyone. we had all managed to survive somehow and my joy i felt was something that i could never find the words to fully describe. i was about to call to mr. carter the computer teacher, i was about to tell him to call down to the police and tell them that rory was unconcious and that it was all over, that we could all go home. i was about to do all these things before i saw rory limp slowly out of the closet and the words i had been so ready to say died on my tounge. how had rory not been knocked unconcious? the force had been strong enough to open a door but not strong enough to render rory unconcious? tears welled up in my eyes, every hope i had just had about getting out of this alive was now gone, that joy i had felt mere seconds before, had been snatched away from me quicker then i could ever imagine. it was like one of those horror movies where the villian keeps appearing dead but somehow always come back to life. rory had successfully limped out of the closet and was now standing, his injured arm dangled at his side. his blood dripped down from his wound and onto the floor. rory had come out of the closet but not alone, he had pulled a broom out with him. the boy who had shot rory and himself was laying on his back still panting and clutching his shoulder. his eyes wide and disbelieving that after all his fighting rory was still alive. "no rory!" i screamed at the top of my lungs. my voice broke from the sheer anger and sadness i was feeling in those moments. rory turned away from the boy and looked at me and i could no longer see the friend i had once had. "what laylah? your not on my side? you don't want me to win?" he asked as though he were genuinly surprised. "no rory i don't want you to win!" i sobbed, "i want this to all be over! i want to go home and i don't want anyone else to die!" i screamed at him. he looked shocked almost hurt and it made me think, "did rory think i was on his side this whole time? that just because i was his friend made this all okay?" "fine laylah" rory began, "i'll put an ending on this baby, just for you alright?" he said. turning away from me and his words made my blood run cold. still holding the broom tight in his hand, he stepped over to the boy "rory don't hurt him!" i screamed. i wanted to get up and run over to them. i wanted more then anything to stop rory froming hurting the boy, who i came to see as something of a savior. the boy watched rory moving closer to him but he made no attempt to get away. i was sure the boy was unable to move due to his lack of energy and the painful shot to the arm. "rory!" i screamed again knowing full well that rory would ignore me. i screamed at rory once more as i watched him bring down the broom handle and a sickening "crack" filled the hall. i broke into to even more tears now as the only other person who could have helped, the only one who could've taken down rory was dead. as i cried in the hall i heard small nearly inaudible footsteps coming towards me. i knew who those steps belonged to, there was no surprise and by rory's earlier words i had a feeling that he was going to end my life. i squeezed my eyes shut and began to pray silently in my head. i was also making apologies for every wrong i had committed in my life and i wished that i had been smart enough to use my camera time on the news to tell my friends and family how much i loved them. a cold hand on my shoulder brought me back from my thoughts. i opened my eyes and looked up to see rory kneeling beside me. i pushed his hand away angry and scared. if he was going to kill me i didn't want it to be up close and personal. i was too furious and frightened to even look at him. "don't worry laylah, he's not dead" i heard rory say. "what?" i asked looking up at him my breath catching on my words. "i don't think he's dead, he could be though i'm not sure but i don't think i hit him hard enough to kill him" rory muttered. wheter his words were directed at me or himself i wasn't sure. "anyway that's not important, listen you said you wanted an ending right? your ready for all this to be over?" he asked me in a slightly eager way. i looked up into the face of my former friend and for a moment i could still see the old rory flickering dimmly inside of him. "yeah" i whispered unsure if my request for an ending would be anwsered with my death. "yeah me too" he said still kneeling next to me. "listen laylah" rory began. a deadly serious yet soft tone filled his voice. "we've know each other since we were five right? and seriously i love you like a sister and a bestfriend and i really didn't want you here today. you believe me right?" he asked. i nodded unable to answer my oldest friend. rory gave me something of a saddened smile as he stood. "are you turning yourself in now rory?" i asked softly his previous words still held in my head and the relife of knowing he wasn't going to kill me washed over my body. he turned away from me so that his back now faced me and he turned his head to look at me "no" he whispered. i sat confused by the words rory told me, if he didn't intend on turning himself in then that meant. "oh god" i muttered as i watched as rory limped over to the boy's either unconcious or dead body. rory slowly picked up the weapon that lay on the floor next to the boy's hand. "your going to kill yourself?" i yelled at him in surprise "yeah" he muttered. "i'm not going to jail laylah, that's not what i want to do" he said his voice filling with a strenght that he shouldn't have had. i was speechless, never during this massacer did i ever think it was going to end in suicide. "you can't" i said to him my words rushing out of my mouth. "yeah, i can and i going to right now." he said as he limped slowly over to the large bay window at the very end of the hall. "i told you i wanted to be a ledgend and i can't do that if i'm alive. plus like i said i never intended on going to jail" rory added as he finally stopped infront of the window. i watched him as he looked down at the parking lot below. "now" he began, "everyone is gonna see" he said a grin spread on his face. i sat only a few feet away from rory, crying once again. i watched as rory turned his back to the window now facing me. he held the gun tightly in his right hand. he then proceeded to turn the gun facing it towards his chest, right where his heart was located. "this is it" he whispered and i could tell from his voice he wasn't really nervous or scared, he sounded ready. "there's nothing i can say to stop you?" i asked through my tears. i wasn't entirely ready to argue with him and his gun over this matter. even though rory had killed so many people and had caused so much pain to myself and others. i still didn't want him to die. "nah i'm ready to do this." rory told me. "but you can do something for me laylah" he said. "what?" i asked confused as to what rory's request of me would be so late in the game. "just tell people about me laylah. tell them i wasn't always like this. tell them my story." he told me his voice cracking. "why me rory?" i sobbed out, "because laylah, your the only one who can." he gave me another of those sad smiles and in that moment he was illuminated from behind by the sun and it gave him an unearthly glow. in this moment, in his smile i could see rory for who he had been not who he was now. in these last moments of his life i could see him, i could see my friend rory. "goodbye rory" i said to him. my tears falling to the floor and mixing with my crimson blood. "goodbye laylah and i hope to see you again someday" rory spoke those words, his final words he ever would speak and the last thing i'd ever hear him say. he held the gun tight and in the glowing sunlight behind him i could see tears running down his face. i heard the gun go off squeezing out the last bullet and taking the last life of that day. i didn't want to watch as rory killed himself but i just couldn't pull my eyes away. i watched as rory's face sank into a blissfull sort of state, as the bullet peirced his chest. the force from the close range shot had sent rory flying backwards into the large glass window. he had broken through it and it was beautiful in a odd way. the glass from the window broke and rained down in shards around him. rory proceeded to fall down onto the hard pavement below. the image of rory killing himself would be forever burned into my mind and i knew that years later i would still wake up and see him like that. now at last this horror really was over, we were all survivors of one of the worst school shootings to happen in america. "mr. carter!, it's over! rory is dead!" i screamed to the chicken of a teacher and classmates who had not once come out to help the boy and i. thinking of that brave boy i whispered the words "please don't be dead" as i looked back at him. i collasped back onto my back, just waiting for the moment when the cops would bring us out of the school. because the broken window i could now hear the commotion of the people below. "is that boy dead?" i heard someone yell. "someone call an ambulance another added". "he was the shooter" a third person chimed in. i could still feel the pain of gunshot wound and i could hear the noise of the ambulence, i could hear footsteps and a man's voice say "my god". i could tell the man's voice was mr. carter. "mr. carter! i've been shot and i think i need an ambulance" i called to him. "laylah your still alive?" he said surprised "i saw the blood and assumed the two of you were dead" mr. carter said. i heard mr. carter's footsteps come closer and eventually i saw his legs approach me. mr. carter glanced down at me and gave me a quick yet worried smile before moving away from me and towards the window. "my name is mark carter! we have injured students up here! we need help now!" he called to the police below. "oh god rory" i heard him mutter and i knew he must've seen rory's body. "its alright laylah, kids their sending police officers into the building!" mr. carter cried out in what could barely be considered a happy tone. just a few minutes later the police were upstairs with us, one of them had rushed over to me and i could hear him radio something to his fellow officers. "teenaged female with a gunshot wound to the leg" he called. "have an ambulance ready" he told them. "young lady. i'm going to take you downstairs now. your going to be alright." the officer knelt down next to me and proceeded to scoop me up into his arms. i flinched as pain shot through my leg but i ignored it all too happy to get the hell out of the school. as i rested against the man we passed by another officer who was inspecting the blacked haired boy who had helped me. "is he dead?" i asked my voice surprisingly hoarse. "no he's alive" the officer told me offering me a smile that i could not return. ********************************************************************* lol i actually got teary eyed when i wrote this! ~redmoonchick~

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Wednesday, February 28, 2007

he tastes like you only sweeter

mood: upbeat music: thnks fr th mmrs-fall out boy hi, well so i didn't go to school yesterday so i didn't have to deal with the screwed up schedule after all! the reason for me not going to school was that in the morning my clothes were not dry and i literally had nothing to wear and i was sleepy so yeah no school for me! i also sent danny a text to see if he was going and he said he wasn't so i didn't have to feel bad about it either! now danny better come to school today or i'll hurt him! (danny if your reading this why don't you comment for once! XD) not much happened today oh thank you everyone for the wonderful sixteen comments yesterday! *big hugs for all* i was only one away from breaking my record! oh well maybe today? my mom went and got out pictures that we had at a store from like two years ago! yeah we kinda forgot about them so they've been at the drug store since july of 2006! ^^; the pictures were fun to look at though cause i got to see what i looked like two years ago and how different all my friends look now compared to then! i also got to see the pics of me and my now ex-boyfriend (the one i met on the myo) and it brought up bittersweet memories. i just wish he'd get on here now and then so i could talk to him. yesterday i mentioned that there was someone i met on myo that i found annoying and most of you guys suggested that i ignore them. well i have been as i have not visited this person in forever and yet the kid can't take a hint and keeps coming to my site. i near just PMing the kid and telling them to stop leaving snide remarks on my site. but i really hate to be mean...oh well i'll think of something. well it's wednesday and it's the return of: ~REDMOONCHICK'S MANGA REVIEW EDTION#9~ ok so this weeks manga is called "anne.freaks" it's about a girl named anna who is involved in this weird organization with questionable intentions. well the manga begings with a boy named yuri who killed his own mother and is burying her when he meets anna, later in the manga they also meet a boy named mitsuba whose family was killed by a rival organization. the three teenagers team up and live together with anna and try to figure things out. personally i was a little numb after reading this manga also a bit nauseous from all the death. the art is beautiful and anna is a really interesting character, the only complaint i have is that the volume was too short, but i like that even though the characters of this manga are killers they still have redemable qualities. this manga has a little of everything romance, it's funny moments, action, and suspense. by the last chapter my heart was beating so fast, and at four volumes all together "anne.freaks" is a great manga for a small price! redmoonchick give's "anne.freaks" 7 out of 10! anne.freaks volume one cover ~redmoonchick~

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Tuesday, February 27, 2007

broken down on memory lane

mood: sleepy/grumpy/pissed off at computer music: don't you know who i think i am -fall out boy hi, well i am a bit mad at my computer because i had my entire post typed up and ready to post it and what does my computer do? it freezes thus erasing everything i had just typed! oh well well yesterday at school was pretty boring because danny wasn't there. he said he was "sick" but i think he's just hung over from the weekend! XD although he really could be sick! some of you may have remembered my post on friday saying how my school schedule was all screwed up. well mr. principal wasn't done yet and he yet again decided to change up the schedule! now tomorrow morning instead of first hour i will be going to fourth hour. now for me that means having to go to yoga at 8:00 in the morning! and to add salt to the wound it's aerobic day tomorrow which means lots of cardio activity! it finally happened! i finally finished the world war two diary that i had been working on for three weeks! it took me so long to do because i really hate history and also i was being lazy! the teacher was even so impressed with my work that she said it more then makes up for all the assignments i had missed in that class. also in that same class we've begun to watch the movie flags of our fathers. usually i don't like war movies but this one is really good! also during fifth hour we were suppose to be writing tall tale stories about character we created and i didn't finish mine because my brother and i were too busy making up X rated yet hilarious names! none of which i can repeat here but they were funny! we were laughing so hard that people were staring at us! oh i want to say thank you to everyone who commented friday and yesterday! 15 comments for each day! i haven't had numbers like that in along time! now if only i could get past sixteen comments to have a new record! yesterday i also got to talk to my friend danielle who transferred to a different school. we talked via myotaku private messaging. it was really good to talk to her and i miss her terribly! oh i was also considering going to a fall out boy concert here in michigan in may. the tickets are cheap so i should be able to get some! the only real problem i had was to whom i'd go with. i asked danny even though he hates fall out boy and he said that he'd go with me. *hugs for danny* but i haven't ironed anything out with him so it's really only an idea right now. i'm beginning to think that girls and boys can't just be friends with each other. like i mean that every girl wants attention of some sort even from their guy friends and they can be slightly over protective and even sometimes jealous of their guy friends girlfriends. like today this guy and girl who've been friends for a long time were sitting in front of me in the computer lab and the girl was flirting with the guy full on and the guy was totally oblivious! but not all cases are like this i mean that yes sometimes that fine line between friendship and something more is crossed. but i mean like me and danny were friends and i have no romantic feelings for him but i do love him in a friends only type of way. wow i went deep in that paragraph. ok before i go i have a couple questions for you guys: 1. have you guys ever met anyone on the myo that you didn't like? i mean that you found very annoying? i have but don't worry it's not anyone on my friends list 2.how do you check other peoples sites? like what order do you go in? i myself always visit people who comment on my site first alright sorry for the semi long post! ~redmoonchick~

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Monday, February 26, 2007

   don't pretend you ever forgot about me

mood: content listening to: the news hi, wow this weekend went by so fast! it feels like i just got started and now it's already over. well yesterday was my bestfriends sixteenth birthday but i couldn't celebrate with her because my mom wouldn't take me over her house. so i recieved a call around 2:30 this afternoon and my friend leaves the most depressing message ever on my answering machine! so yeah now i feel bad. but she is having a party next friday. well a "smoke party" to be exact, what is a smoke party redmoonchick you might ask and well i'll say a smoke party is where you get a lot of pot and smoke and smoke until everyone is blazed out of there minds. now i'm not too thrilled about this because i'm not a pot smoker. i have tried it and i will only do it on the rare occasions but i don't care for it too much. oh before i forget i want to thank inuyashafan4-ever because she was my 200th guest book signing! hooray for me i hit 200! (202 now) i want to adress a few comments from friday: detectivedanielle: "lol and you said i had a thing for danny" alright danielle you know i don't have a thing for danny! he is just my friend and as my friend i tend to talk about him alot. i hope it doesn't seem as if i have a thing for him. em0taku(danny): "i don't look like pete wentz or brendon urie" oh yes you do and i have a bunch of people who agree so i win! redmoonchick: "yeah thanks for flashing me i'll have nightmares for life" ok that was me talking about danny who flashed me as he was leaving school on friday. the comment was suppose to go above his but knights edge commented before i could so it kinda looke like i was talking to him XD alright in other news i am very far behind in my manga. i haven't even gotten the ones for january yet and it's almost march! i have four to get in january those four being: black cat, death note, fma, and free collars kingdom. and two for february: claymore and judas. so yeah definitly need a job to support my manga habit. oh i put a song on my site! it's a awesome song off the new fob cd! if you've never heard a fall out boy song i suggest you listen to it! blah don't have much to talk about today but if anyone cares danny (yes my friend danny) has a myo site it's em0taku and he updates sometimes so if you guys are bored maybe you could look him up. hmm before i go i think i'll give you guys some usless trivia about my story "my friend rory" .the school that the characters go to is basiclly my school i'm descibing . my friend danielle, danny, and myself all appear in the story. i think were in the class room in chapter three or four . the entire story is based off a dream i had . the screen name rory uses in the first chapter is actually the meaning of the name rory ok so there's your usless facts about the story i hope somebody got a kick out of them! random pic of pete wentz ~redmoonchick~

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Friday, February 23, 2007

bestfriends, ex-friends till the end

mood: very very sleepy watching: jimmy kimmle live hi, so yeah after yesterday's throughly depressing post. i am happy to report that i am feeling better today. some thanks are in order so thank you to all the people who commented yesterday. you all made me feel so good. and ecspecially big thanks go out to hoaryu who left me the longest comment i've ever recieved and even sent me a follow up PM later to make sure i was alright! thank you hoaryu! *hugs for him* well also yesterday i managed not to mention fall out boy! see lordsesshomaru i can do it! XD hmmm well tomorrow our school is having a weird schedual day. where sixth hour will be during first hour, fifth hour during second hour, ect. which means i won't see danny until lunch time! boo new schedual you suck! i also wanted to ask you guys something: 1. could you guys tell me if the video in my profile works for you? it doesn't work on my home computer or the one at school so i was wondering. something else that's been on my mind as of late is the otaku rankings here on the myo. a few ok a lot of my friends are senior otaku's or otaku ledgends. so i was wondering how does one achieve such a title? i mean i always thought it was just about popularity but i could be wrong so i thought i'd ask. out of lack of anything else to talk about i decided to post a kinda funny story that again involves danny. (wow alot of my post have involved him lately) but i gotta stop posting about danny because i'm just feeding his already huge ego! (just kidding danny) well a while back danny, my brother, and i were all sitting in the computer lab after school and danny was talking on aim to a girl he knew. i was sitting next to him so i read some of his conversation here and there but mostly i wasn't paying attention until danny told me something strange. he told me that the girl he was talking to claimed to have seen danny's "ghost" in her bedroom late at night. now danny and i found this hilarious so he told the girl that next time she saw his "ghost" that she should try to have sex with it and she said that she would try! (ok danny it's time to stop picking up girls from the loony bin!) well after getting his permission i decided to post some pictures of danny since i talk about him so much. ok this first one is what danny looks like everyday minus the hat i just thought this one was funny it's him with wet hair this is the other way danny usually looks notice the hat! well i didn't just post pics of danny for no reason i wanted to ask your guys opinion on something. i really truly think danny looks like this guy: pete wentz from fall out boy or this guy brendon urie from panic! @ the disco so what do you guys think? do you think my friend danny looks like either one of these guys? alright time for me to go to bed if you read through this mostly pointless post thank you! ~redmoonchick~ the thing about charlie is that he doesn't seem scared to be going to the army, no he seemed so calm and i envied him for that. of course my parents are proud of charlie as are most people we know and yet my father still only spares me passing glances apparently still angry about the jail mishap. my life and the lives of my friends were somewhat still normal, except for the huge surprise that patrick pulled on everyone, he got married. yes patrick married his high school sweetheart sarah less then two weeks after our draft conversation. their wedding was small and intimate with the only attendants being sarah and patick's parents and of course the boys and i. our lives wasn't the only thing that stayed the same, the news did too. everyday i'd see the news and they'd talk about the same things, like the bombing of pearl harbor, hitler and his devious nazi's, the president speaking publicly here and there, it was all the same. except for today, today an annoucement was made that something called a "draft drawing" would be held tonight at 7:00 and that anyone's whose birthday month was called would be immedintly drafted and sent out shortly after that. upon hearing the news while i ate breakfast that morning, i immedintly dropped my fork and ran to the phone then proceeded to call patrick, pete, joe, and andy. after talking to the four of them i sat in silence at the kitchen table head in my hands wishing with all my might that pete wasn't right. we had agreed to watch together that night, the five of us. the boys arrived a little after six-thirty, patrick hadn't broughten sarah because she was at home watching for the sake of her three brothers. we all sat there in the living room piled in front of the large black and white TV, the boys and i, my parents and my little sister, charlie and a few of his work friends and a few of my pop's work friends. we all sat around the living room none of us saying a word, everyone to nervous either for themselves or someone they knew and loved. promptly at seven the news program came on and the scene was a large stage set somewhere in washington. on the stage was a man dressed in a dapper black suit, infront of him rested something that resembled a bingo turner filled with white plastic balls, also in front of the man sat a long thin microphone and behind him a large black electric board with the name of all twelve months on it. "this is the site where the draft drawing will take place." a reporter who appeared on screen said. "in just a few moments time four months will be drawn out of the holder and any young man who is between eighteen and fifty and born in the drawn month will be drafted." the reporter continued. i glanced nervously from patrick to pete knowing that either one of my friends could be drafted into this war. several minutes passed as the reporter on TV did his best to keep his audience entertained until the drawing began. he showed behind him a good hundred yards away was a large group of people most if not all were holding signs and a camera panned across the group, showing women, men, and even children standing there and chanting something along the line of "hell no, we won't go", they were protesters. my father grimaced and made some remark about "damn hippies" and his friends chuckled a bit and agreed with him. also at the site of the drawing was a group of men and women most likely local who had come out to watch publicly. finally it was time for the drawing to start, we could see a man off to the corner of the stage nod and give the go motion causing the man in the black suit center stage to nod and begin turning the ball holding contraption. we all watched in silence as the plastic balls that held all our fates spun round and round. "we will draw four balls." the man began as he continued to turn the handle of the machine, he continued to spin for a good minute before he slowed and eventually stopped. slowly almost apprhensivly he reached in and pulled out the first white ball, the first ball that in seconds would destroy someone's life. we could see the man looked visibly nervous and he gulped and took a deep breath before reading off the month. "th-the first month to be called is january" the man said and cries of pleasure and horror filled the drawing site as both the civilians and protesters reacted to the first draw. i was just elated that none of us were born in january, i had gotten lucky being only a month off from my birth month, but not everyone was spared as one of my father's friends let out something between a gasp and a cry. "that's my boy!" he shouted sadly "he's weak, he'll never make it in the war!" the man was visibly shaken and covered his eyes with his hand. "come on richard, i'll get you a drink" my father told his friend as he lead him out of the living room and into the kitchen, "charlie, tell me what's called next alright?" my father said as he passed my brother, charlie nodded practicing his military moves already. "one down three to go" i heard pete say and i nodded. the month of january on the electric board behind the man on stage was lit up bolded for all to see. once again the man on stage spun the device and i prayed that my friends and i would make it out unscathed. the man stopped his spinning and again withdrew a ball. "the second month is...june" my mouth dropped open and my heart sank as i felt my prayers die only seconds after they had begun. june had been called and we all knew whose birthday was in june...pete's. i heard patrick let out a "no!" and i glanced at joe and andy whose expressions reflected my own, before looking at pete himself who was still just sitting his arms on his knees and his expression stoney and hard to read. now pete had always been a bit strange we had all come to except that, but there was no way that after his month was called he could be so calm! "peter dear, are you alright?" my mother asked pete from behind him as she sat on the couch. i saw pete's brown eyes flash for a moment before he lifted his head from where he had been resting it on his knees "i'm not sure" and as stupid as it sounded in the moment i knew that at least his anwser was thruthful. "you should be proud petey boy! proud to serve this wonderful nation!" i heard the self rightious tone of my brother's voice from behind us as he leaned against the back wall. i turned to look at charlie my face an expression of shock and anger. "shut it charlie! we're not all like you! we don't all want to serve our country by fighting!" i yelled at him. "yes obviously you don't but you can't speak for everyone james" charlie said to me as if i were four years old. i nearly jumped up to beat the crap out of charlie, if not for two reasons, one i knew it wouldn't solve anything and two pete's hand grabbed my arm holding me down before i could even get up. "it's ok jimmy" he said looking me in the eyes "i'm ok" he added and turned back to the TV. i gave a worried look to patrick who rested his hand on pete's shoulder "i'm sorry pete" patrick whispered, pete nodded and joe and andy were still too surprised to say anything. june was lit on the board before the spinning process began all over again, it felt like it went daster this time around as my mind was still reeling from the last ball being called. "the third ball" the man began once he had retrived said ball. "is may" i actually hadn't thought it was possible but my heart sunk lower, not may! of all the ten months it just had to be may. "man we are some unlucky bastards" pete muttered "first it's me and now it's patrick" he said turning to look at the now wide eyed boy. now i was angry! how dare fate do this to me and my friends!, how dare it set up a war and then pull us in unvoluntarily one right after the other. patrick was nowhere near as good at hiding his emotions as pete and almost instantly he began shaking, tears already threating to fall from behind his glasses. "patrick..." i began unsure of what to say to him, what could i say? what could possibly make this moment better for him? nothing i could think of to say, so his name hung there until i died no follow up to take it's place. charlie said nothing this time he offered no words of what patrick should be feeling because patrick was feeling exactly as he should. i heard my mother get up and go into the kitchen maybe it was because she couldn't take patrick's reaction or maybe it was that she wanted to call patrick's mother. both of my guess were proven to be wrong as my mother soon returned with a two glasses of my fathers best alchohal and handed them to pete and patrick, who both took their drinks and indulged in them. "not patrick, please not patrick!" i could hear joe mutter and andy nodded, i knew we all felt the same way patrick was definitly not a fighter and if he was sent to war chances are that he wouldn't come back. during the drawing for the fourth and final ball i could barely pay attention, even though joe, andy, and myself were all on the chopping block, but even if our months were called pete's "rules" meant that we weren't allowed to go to war, but that's just what pete thought he heard from his father, there was no concrete evidence that said that those rules were true. i willed myself to pay attention to the final ball as the man lifted it from the many others. "the final month is... december" he called out. the room was silent for nearly a minute no one saying or doing anything, i myself just sat there on the floor infront of the TV next to my soon to be drafted friends and it looked like i was joining them. my month had been called, my mother burst into tears and ran out the room. my father and charlie's friends all proceeded to file out of the living room, the ones who actually knew me gave me quick pats on the back before leaving and i could hear them exchange goodbyes with my father. leaving the only ones still in the living room being me, my friends and charlie. no one said anything including me, there was really nothing to be said at this point, unless pete's rules were true i was going to war. i heard footsteps and knew my father had come back into the room, he must've saw the six of us still sitting in silence and he must've looked at charlie asking what the last three months were. "june, may, and december" i heard charlie whisper to my father, i didn't bother looking back at either of them i kept my focus on the pictures flashing in front of me. my father didn't say anything and once again i heard footsteps leading towards my parents rooms and i knew he must've went to console my mother. "there are some rules to the drafting" we heard the man on the television say. "any man whose month was called. if you are the only male in your family and your father isn't old enough to bare another child then you will not be going. if you have a older or younger brother whose enlisted then you are not going, but that doesn't account for people with two or more brothers. if you do have one or more brothers and if you are the youngest then you are not going. if you are under eighteen or over fifty you are not going. if you have certain medical problems you won't be going. now for all those who are still going you will recieve letters or a phone call sometime during tonight or tomorrow evening. thank you and god bless." was what the man said before it shot back to the reporter who was talking over the roar of the elated and disgruntled crowd. a few more moments of silence filled the room before someone finally spoke "i think i'll be going now" pete said as he stood from his spot on the floor, patrick nodded and stood as well, "me too" he said quietly. andy, joe, and i all stood as well even though i had just been let off the hook i still wasn't happy, my friends were still going to the war. the five of us all stood there each not exactly sure what to do next, maybe the knowledge of our bestfriends being shipped off was too much for any of us to bear. finally patrick made a move towards the door with pete and the rest of us following behind him. on the way out we offered no words to charlie and he kept quiet as well, we arrived outside the slightly chilly wind sweeping over us, i felt goosebumps rise over my skin but i wasn't sure that it was the winds fault. "do you wanna give me a ride home james?" pete asked me shakily, i nodded dumbly and fished for my keys in the pocket of my jacket before pulling them out ungracefully. i knew pete was upset because he called me james and the only time that happened was when he was serious. "do you guys want rides as well?" i asked patrick, andy, and joe, they shook there heads "nah we can walk" joe anwsered for the both of them. we all looked at each other our bodies and shadows illuminated by the orange glow of the street lamp and for some reason it felt like a final goodbye, even though we all knew it wasn't, we all knew that tomorrow we could all eat lunch together at the diner or hang out at the gas station where i worked, but it just felt like a goodbye. "goodnight then" andy said and clapped pete and patrick on the shoulder before he zipped his jacket up, "night andrew" pete said while patrick said nothing, joe nodded towards the three of us before he too turned to walk home with andy, "night joesph" pete said and joe raised a hand to wave to us. pete, patrick, and i climbed into the cab of the pick up truck, squeezing our way into fitting three people into the cab. we drove in silence and we passed andy and joe as they were walking giving the horn a small honk as we passed. i knew why andy and joe walked, they felt guilty for not being called and even if they were called that they couldn't go, but i could've been wrong and the reason for their walking was that they actually didn't live to far away from my house, neither did patrick or pete for that matter but i wanted to give them a ride. "i can't go" we heard pete say, "pete-" i began "no jimmy! there's no way in hell i can go! and patrick...he's married now!" pete was struggling to keep his emotions in check as he yelled inside the small space of the cab. "i know pete none of us want you to go, but what can we do?" i asked him, he shook his head "i don't know but i'll think of something" pete muttered. march 13, 1942 it had been two days since that night. i had yet to recieve my call from the army, i assumed i wouldn't be getting one because of the drafting rules. i had called to check in on pete and patrick for the last two days, half to see if they were ok and half to see if they had gotten their phone calls yet. neither of them had so i allowed myself to believe for a moment that they never would get those calls. meanwhile charlie was estatic to be going and i wished desperately that he wouldn't be so positive, not when pete and patrick were being forced to do something that he signed up for, but at the same time i couldn't be mad at charlie if it hadn't been for him signing up then i would've been drafted. i had the day off from work so i was hanging around the house doing nothing of paticular importance. i considered calling the guys and getting us all together for a hearty lunch at the diner, because i was afraid that if we didn't get together then we never would again. the thought left me for a moment as i heard the phone ring, my mother was doing some chore so i got up to answer it. "hello?", "jimmy!" i heard a girls frantic voice on the phone say "sarah? what is it?" i asked fear rising in my throat. why would patrick's wife be calling me? "did something happen to patrick?" i asked nervously, "yeah jimmy...he got his call...he's shipping out in april" sarah sniffled and excused herself as she let out a sob. i thought about letting her hang up but i wanted to talk to patrick first. "sarah can i talk to him?" i asked unsure of what state patrick was in by now. "yeah hold on" sarah whispered into the phone, she was gone for a moment and in a minutes time patrick was on the phone with me. "hey jimmy" i could hear from his voice that he'd been crying as well, "patrick i'm sorry" it was the first and only thing i could think of to say. "do you want to go talk about it over lunch?" i asked him, "yeah sounds good" was his only relpy "alright i'll meet you at the diner in an half hour" i told him "yeah" he agreed and we hung up. i still held the phone in my hand even after patrick had hung up. my first thought was to call pete, to see if pete was alright, but my mind wouldn't allow it. i stood numbed in the kitchen holding the phone in my hand, my eyes glued to the calendar next to it. april wasn't far away, not far away at all two weeks to be exact. i laughed at the idea that i only had two weeks left with one of my oldest and dearest friends, because that's what it was laughable. i dialed pete's number after a few more minutes of standing there the dial tone buzzing in my ear. "hello?" i heard pete's rough voice answer, "pete it's jimmy", "hey" was all he said and i was afraid that maybe he too had gotten a phone call from the military. "i uh just talked to patrick" i said unsure of where to go, "yeah me too he called me a few minutes ago" pete told me, "he's getting shipped in april" i half asked half stated, "yeah i know" pete began "so am i". my mouth dropped again and i swear i felt my heart break on the spot. no not both of them! please god anything but both of them! how was it fair that they both had to go? how could any of it be fair?!?. "james you still there?" pete asked his voice low and emotionless. "yeah pete listen i-were-do you wanna go eat lunch at the diner and talk about it with the guys?" i asked him, he was silent for a moment and i was sure he was going to say no, "sure i'll meet you there in a half hour" pete said in that same creepy emotionless tone, "right" i agreed and we too hung up the phone. i also called andy and joe and informed them of what had happened to our friends, their responses were duplicates of mine a mix of shock angry silence. so we all agreed to meet at sparky's diner in thirty minutes. i left the house and arrived at the diner, during the drive my mind refused to believe that this was all actually happening. upon entering the diner i saw that pete and joe were already there, i slid in next to joe and a few minutes later andy and patrick arrived nearly at the same time so i assumed that they had met up during the walk to the diner. we all sat there, the five of us bestfriends since birth, all unsure of what to say to one another. it was patrick who finally brought up the topic that everyone wanted to talk about but no one wanted to say. "pete di-did they give you a certain date in april?" patrick asked as he took a sip of his coke. pete nodded and swallowed the bite of burger he had been chewing, "the fith" he said looking at patrick, "what about you?" he asked "the second" patrick replied. there was more silence for a brief moment "i can't go" pete said suddenly, as he slammed his fist down on the table, he looked wild and angry and scared all mixed up in one. it was strange to see pete like this, peter was the oldest of the group and as such we often had looked up to him as our makeshift leader, something we had been doing ever since we were kids, but now to see him like this to watch pete fall apart. "pete calm down, didn't you say that you'd think of something? didn't your dad tell you anything?" joe asked pete. pete's head shot up instantly as if he'd just been shocked or something, he looked at us his eyes wide and i swear as i watched him i could see the gears of his mind turning, working something out. "yeah" he began after a long moment. but his tone led me to believe that he wasn't sure he wanted to tell us what it was that he was thinking. "there are these people..., men who were drafted into the army, but instead of going to the war they leave and go to canada or mexico where they can't be drafted" we were silent as pete explained his idea to us. "you want us to leave america? to leave our homes? and go to canada?" patrick asked, "yeah my dad told me about it. it's as easy as hopping on a bus., i mean andy, joe, you guys don't have to go because your not being drafted, but patrick, jimmy, and i we can all-" pete was interrupted by patrick "pete jimmy isn't being being drafted remember?" patrick said. "yeah right well jimmy gets to stay too then" pete said quickly, his mind back to it's mile a minute self. "you can't be serious! what about my life here? what about sarah?" patrick shouted out while looking at pete disbelieveingly. "well bring her along it doesn't matter patrick. think of it this way would you rather go an live in canada? or go and die somewhere you don't belong?" pete told him. patrick nodded obviously taking the latter of the two options. we disscussed what leaving to canada would entail, if patrick and pete did leave then they would be marked as abandoners and looked down upon, but in that moment i don't think pete or patrick cared. we parted ways soon after i went was heading home once again during the drive i was numb. i didn't want to lose patrick and pete, i really didn't want them to go, i just wished that the damn war would end so we could all stay together. even though i said i didn't want them to go i still hope that they would because i would rather have them be called traitors then be dead somewhere. i arrived home pulling into the driveway surprised to see my father's car parked there, wasn't he and charlie suppose to be at work? a slight worry filled me as i hopped out of the car, i knew my father i knew what kind of man he was, he was the kind of man that never missed work. upon entering the house i saw a horrible scene. my brother charlie was on the kitchen floor screaming in pain, my father knelt down next to him pressing a cloth to his leg, while my mother was on the phone in the kitchen "yes my son charlie. yes he's had a terrible accident please come quickly!" my mother shouted into the phone. as i got closer i recoiled in horror at the sight of my brother, his right leg or at least what was left of it was bleeding profusly and i could barely tell that it was his leg i was looking at. he was howling in pain and i didn't want to hear it. my father spotted me and instantly called me over "dad what happened?" i asked too stunned to do much else. "a machine caught charlie's leg and pulled him into it! i managed to pull him out but it tore up his leg real bad" my father grimaced as he told me and i could only imagine the pain charlie was going through right now. the ambulance arrived two minutes later and took a bloody charlie away and i got a call from my father many hours later saying that they had to cut off charlie's leg. yes my twenty two year old brother who had just enlisted in the army was now crippled. shortly after charlie lost his leg my father called the army and told them about it. an army man visited our house and informed my parents and i that now that charlie was missing a leg his services in the military weren't necessary. i wasn't too upset about this it was actually good because now charlie didn't have to go to war, god how i wish i would've realized what that meant for me. "well now that charlie is crippled he won't be going to the war." the military man began "but that also means that now the rules don't apply to your son james and he will now be shipped off on april third" the man informed us. my mouth dropped and i knew i was shaking, i now knew exactly how pete and patrick felt as the stared down their eminit doom. the man left and once again my mother began to cry and my father remained silent as he went to console her. i stood my mind swimming and the only thoughts going through my head were "i'm not going to war". i strode into the kitchen before picking up the phone and calling pete. "hey pete it's me jimmy. listen count me in on canada" april 1st,1942 we left on the first of april, the day before patrick was suppose to be sent out and two days before i was suppose to go while pete still had four days left. i was nervous as we left hell i think we all were mostly because we were leaving behind everything we had ever know. we stood out on the corner of fifth and main street a good six blocks from my house, it was five o clock in the morning and the sky was still dark. i stood there with pete and patrick my bag thrown over my shoulder holding everything i could think to bring. i had snuck out of the house around four thirty and met up with patrick and pete as they waited at the end of the block. they too had their bags slung over their backs and a nervous air about them. we had a plan at least we slightly knew what we were doing, for the last two weeks we had been planning this in secret pete, patrick, and i. pete's dad had set pete up with a guy in canada who we could stay with and he also gave pete pleanty of money to last the three of us for at least four months. patrick looked miserable as we stood on the corner waiting our bus of destiny, the reason for patrick's saddness was that he was without his dear wife sarah. patrick had asked sarah to come with him to canada sarah refused saying she couldn't desert her country and she couldn't be married to someone who would, she quietly ended their marriage yet promised that she wouldn't tell anyone where the three of them were going. i myself had left a note on the kitchen table of my childhood home, in the morning my father will probably find the note and be surprised and dissapointed, my mother will probably cry and charlie would probably hate me. andy and joe hadn't came with us to see us off they had done that the night before. pete seemed excitied to go and i envied his ability to just go and leave our home town. five minutes later we saw the headlights of the number seven bus shine down the street, it chugged it's wat along until it pulled to a stop right infront of us. we climbed on board pete paying the fare and us flashing our bus tickets, we tooks seats in the back seeing as how there were very few people on board. the seats were in pairs of two's patrick and i sat next to each other and pete sat across from us, i rested my head back against the seat as the bus slowly pulled away from the stop, from our very lives and i turned my head to watch as our small town dissapered into nothing but the black of the night. my eyes scanned the town trying desperately to memorize every inch of it, to commit it all to memory. after all who knew how long the war would last? what if it was years before i saw my home again? i wondered if maybe pete and patrick were thinking the same thing, i felt tears prick at the corners of my eyes and i closed them tight as i tried to welcome sleep. may 1st, 1942 we've been in canada for a good month now and really it was nothing like i expected. some of the people here are friendly like the people we live with but others are not so much like the people on the streets who somehow know were americans. pete, patrick, and i have been writing to andy and joe every week just to let them know that we were ok and to hear about how our families were doing. patrick was a mess for three weeks after he learned that sarah had remarried a future soilder. we also got jobs here in canada i was now working at a supermarket while pete worked as a waiter and patrick as a janitor at the supermarket i worked at. everyday when i got home i'd watch the news on the TV and cook dinner on the nights it was my turn, it seemed no matter how far away i traveled the news always stayed the same. i watched as the men fought in different places as i saw pictures of them injured and laid up in military hospitals, it struck me that pete, patrick, and i could be where those men are now and suddenly the cramped bedroom i share with them doesn't seem so bad. august 26th,1945 i got word today that the war is finally over! after spending three years away from america we finally get to go home. alot has changed in this last three years, patrick, pete, and i all learned to speak fluent french the native language of canada. patrick met a canadian girl named emily and the two of them have been married for the last two years and are expecting a child together soon, pete and i have been happy too we've been working and making new friends in canada, but i was more then ready to give up the life i had carved here to go back home. andy and joe have also been well during these three years the two of them opened a resturant together and they promised us a free meal when we returned. my family has been fine too i heard that charlie got himself a prostectic leg and is learning to walk again. joe told me that my parents miss me and he even said my dad was near desperate to see me once again, frankily i couldn't wait to get home. finally the day arrived when we boarded a bus like we had three years ago and went back home. there were no balloons, or confetti or people cheering, or parades in our honor like all the soilders were getting but when we pulled up at that same corner on fifth and main street and i saw my family and friends smiling at me i felt like i had all those things.

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Thursday, February 22, 2007

if your head's a prison then these are just conjugal visits

mood: depressed watching: conan o brien hi, wow i was totally not expecting seven comments yesterday! thank you all! seriously i was expecting like one at best. well i want to apologize in advance because this post is flavored mildly depressing. i don't know lately i just feel really sad for some reason. i just feel really ugly and not good enough and just plain old sad. i feel like i'm sinking slowly into depression. i think i mostly feel ugly because of the fact that i am overweight and maybe the whole myspace thing hit me harder then i thought it did. i never mentioned i was overweight before now and it may not seem like a big deal but i did it on purpose i don't know i just didn't want anyone's perception of me to change. like i don't want to be posting and all you guys can think of is a huge overweight girl. hell even as i'm typing this i feel like i should just backspace and delete it all. but maybe i feel i should get this out in the open so i can feel better about all of this. this is also the same reason why i have never put a picture of myself up on my site even though not too many people do. even though i know nobody here would every say anything but it's not so much what people would say as much as it is what people would think about me. *sigh* i don't know maybe i should just get over my fears and post a pic of myself in the near future but i'm not sure if my self esteem will allow it. well i don't want you guys to look to much into this as it is probably just the depressed rantings of teenager with low self esteem. i'm almost sure i'll be fine in a few days time. in other happier news i still didn't finish my world war two diary despite working on it nearly all day. so i don't really know how this news is happier. it's more like a change of subject. well it is thursday my dear friends and that means the next chapter of my story! so last thursday i screwed up and posted the wrong chapter so i'm going to post the entire chapter five. it's alittle long so anybody who already read and remembers the first part of chapter five can skip on down to part two. and as always if anyone missed any of the story or wants to reread it for any reason. feelm free to go to the myo site redmoonchick2 because that's where the story is archived. "my friend rory" chapter five: noon: make a decision rory's words struck me hard like a slap across the face. "infamous?" i wondered what he could mean, and i prayed silently that my hunch wasn't right. rory was currently pulling me along behind him; his hand clutched tightly around my wrist. at first i wasn't sure where we were going but as we raced down the body filled hallway i realized it; we were heading upstairs. the floor upstairs held four classrooms. classrooms that at this point i wasn't sure were empty or full but because rory was heading up to these rooms i could guess that they were in fact full. as the two of us moved i began to think. "should i be doing something to stop him?" i thought "was there anything i could do?, what could i possibly do to stop rory at this point? short of having him kill me and saving his future victims a few spare minutes." my thoughts transferred from what i could do to help the other students to the other students. what were they thinking right now? what thoughts were playing through there minds? did they know they were doomed? or by chance did they think they were free? it was all too much for me to bare. there was no way i could stand idly by and let rory kill those remaining students. i still didn't know how many people had managed to get out or if my brother and ellie were one of them. "rory what if my brother and ellie are upstairs?" i asked him "im not sure yet" he said and it made my blood run cold. "your not going to kill them are you?" i asked not terrified praying that ellie and my brother weren't upstairs. the two of us had reached the top floor everything was silent and the doors in the hall were closed and the lights in the room off. it left everything in the hall with a atmosphere of death as if the school itself were reflecting the actions that had taken place in it. rory let go of my wrist and i noticed a fine purple bruise was forming; rory's fingermarks etched into my skin. rory moved slow and quietly towards the first door in the hall, the computer lab. he reached out slowly and took the door handle turning it and pulling; the door rattled roughly but didn't open, it was locked. "damn" rory muttered as if he hadn't perdicted that the door would be locked. rory appeared to think for a moment considering his options before he raised his foot and kicked the door hard. the door let out a loud rattle; rory kicked again harder this time. the glass in the door broke and shattered covering rory's leg in fragments. "success" rory exclaimed he carefully reached his hand into the now broken glass of the door reaching down he grabbed the handle from the inside and gave it a pull. the door opened mercilessly before rory; he looked back at me grinned and went inside. for a moment i was tempted to stay in the hall believing that if i didn't see it take place then it wasn't real. "laylah" i heard rory say from inside the classroom "come here". i flinched as i heard his words but remorsefully i followed him knowing that i would have to make a choice now; there was no time to wait, no time to properly think it over. if the roles were reversed and i was trapped in a classroom about to be killed wouldn't i want someone to help me? it was then that i decided; it was in that moment that i knew what i had to do but i had to see what rory would do first. chapter five: noon, make a decision: part two inside the computer class the students were huddled together on the floor by the teachers desk. the teacher in question mr. carter was too on the floor huddled by his desk except he was sitting in front of his students in what i'd guess was a last ditch effort to save them. the students in the class at that time ranged from seniors to freshman but there was no doubt that all the students were terrified. most of the girls in the class had burst into tears at the sight of rory and it made me wonder why i was no longer crying; wasn't i scared too? my eyes quickly scanned the students in the class as did rory's and to my relife neither ellie or my brother appeared to be in the class. "alright" rory began. "everybody listen up! the cops are here now and so are the news cameras now heres the deal; i want to go down in history as a legend so now i'm going to kill you all." he said in an emotionless way. at his words more people gasped and cried in fear; i could see them all visibley shaken knowing full well that these could be their last moments. i had also made a decision based on rory's words i decided that now would be a good time to go ahead with my plan; it was just that i couldn't really think of a way to stop rory; that was until i saw a boy in the class staring at me. i moved my head a bit so rory wouldn't notice me and looked at the boy. he was a student i had seen many times but had never actually spoken to; i didn't know his name or what grade he was in but right now none of that was important. the boy seemed to be signalling to me in some way but i couldn't really tell what he meant. "please rory tell me why your doing this?" we heard mr. carter ask. i knew what mr. carter was doing; he was buying time for himself and the students. "that's not important" rory answered; while rory was distracted by his conversation with mr. carter i was still trying to figure out what the mystery boy was saying to me. he lifted his hands up a little trying his best not to draw attention to himself; he pushed his hands forward like he was grabbing or pushing something. i must've still looked confused because he then mouthed the words to me; from what i could tell he was saying "distract him" he then pointed at rory and i knew it was what he meant. i shook my head softly "no" i mouthed thankful that the boy and i were behind rory. i brought my finger to my throat and slid it across then pointed at him signing that this stunt would get him killed. while the boy and i were still signing rory and mr. carter were still talking; about what i wasn't sure. i watched the boy mouth the words "do it' thankfull once again that i was close enough to him to be able to accurately read his lips. i nodded seeing that this was finally my chance to pull off my plan. i saw the boy nod at me he appeared as a mix of anxiety and nerves and i realized that i was the same; i saw the boy sort of get up a little ready to jump up at any moment. i glanced at rory's back checking where he was currently holding his weapon; i took a deep breath trying hard not to think of it as my last. i glanced at the boy once more. "rory!" i half shouted half said. he turned and looked at me surprised. "what?" he asked sounding slightly annoyed "i-i thought i heard something in the hall. what if its the cops?" i said to him; "really?" he asked. i nodded "please, please fall for it" i pleaded to him in my head; he looked at me for a moment before he turned and walked past me heading slowly towards the hall. before rory could reach the hall the unknow boy had leapt up to his feet; he dashed over towards rory jumping on his back "the hell?" rory cried out as he felt the larger boy tackle him. the duo fell to the ground just outside the classroom door; the gun slipping out of rory's hand and skidding across the hall floor. rory and the boy were now struggling on the floor; rory was fighting to once again take hold of his gun and the boy was fighting to keep rory down. the two of them were throwing punches and now rory's lip was bleeding and the boy had a large scratch on the side of his face. "grab the gun!" the boy yelled at me; i was snapped from my daze by this and instantly ran to the hall "laylah no!" rory screamed at me. just as i reached the gun rory had kicked the boy squarely in the chest; rory was now laying stomach down on the floor he too was now scrambling for the gun. i grabbed it first but before i could flee with it a hand grabbed my arm firmly; "i don't think so laylah" rory muttered to me. rory looked positivly crazy; the fight had left him disheveled and bleeding; rory began bending my arm in an unatural way causing me pain. rory continued holding my arm in this way until i was on the ground in front of him; with his other hand he pryed the gun from my hands. "its over" i thought desperately; rory now had the gun he had his power back i was dead for sure. before i gave up i willed myself to try once more despite what may happen to me; rory was standing before me huffing and breathing wildly. "this is it" i thought i scooted a bit closer to him lifted my leg and swiftly kicked him in his dick; pain showed on his face and he dropped to his knees; during his fall to the floor the gun had gone off with a sharp "bang" and i felt a white hot pain filling me. ************************************************ my that was quite a cliffhanger! ~redmoonchick~

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