Saturday, February 7, 2009

ad
Entry one: Tell Me You Remember, Forever Young


"I don't mind if we end up being together forever." Brendon tells his girlfriend.

"Oh really?" Krissy replies, her head is back against the wooden panels of the park bench.

"Yeah, you know how some people are scared of the word forever? Well, I have recently come to figure out that I don't mind as long as you're in my forever." Brendon says, he turns to look at her and she can see him from the corner of her eye. She too turns her head and their looking at each other. Krissy finds it ridiculous that anyone could be scared of the word forever when there were much better things to be scared of these days.

"Why are you thinking about forever?" She wonders outloud. The sky is dark around the two of them. The park they're sitting in is peaceful and quiet, a rare change of pace. There are bright stars twinkling above them, it's like a scene out of a movie, Krissy kind of wishes this all were a movie.

"I think I've been spending too much time with Ryan." The boy anwsers and Krissy laughs darkly. The subject of forever is definitly a Ryan Ross subject..he's the only one who would consider holding on to the idea of forever nowadays. "I'm serious though." He says after a few minutes of silence. "I don't care if my forever is you."

"Forever is a long time Brendon." Krissy says it because it's the truth...well it used to be the truth. She guesses that nowadays, forever doesn't seem so long.

"I'm aware."

"Forever is also a hard promise to keep." She add's, she's thinking of all the promises of forever that she's ever heard. Cassie's promise to love Patrick forever, Jenny's promise to be with Ryan forever, well, it turns out that those were too hard to keep. She's stuck between promises that can be kept and ones that can't, she wondes where she and Brendon will fall.

"But I'm more than willingly to try." Brendon tells her. Krissy feels his hand come out and take her's, squeezing it. "We wouldn't end up like them." Brendon says like he can read Krissy's mind. The blonde girl looks back up at the sky.

"They promised forever too." She points out.

"We're not them."

"You can't stay together forever in this world."

"As long as I'm here with you...we'll be together forever." Brendon tells her, he sit's up to prove his point. He's looking down at his watch but there's really no point because the thing isn't beeping, Krissy fucking hate's that beeping.

"Ryan couldn't protect Jenny...Cassie barely saved Jon...She couldn't save Patrick." Krissy tells him. She doesn't know why she's bringing up things that happened months ago, things that are best forgotten. Brendon sighs and looks down at the ground, they're talking but at the same time they're listening because they've always got to be prepared.

"I'm sorry...I didn't mean to make you think of them." Brendon says, Krissy hates how every voice seems to have lost it's emotion these days. That everyone sounds so sad now, happiness sound's like something that existed a long time ago and it's getting harder for Krissy to remember what happy used to feel like, the closest she can get is Brendon.

"It's okay..talking about them won't change what happened." Krissy won't allow herself to remember that night though. She won't let herself think about how Cassie never smiles anymore and how she can hear the older girl crying at night. "We need to go and visit them one of these days." She adds, almost as an afterthought because she actually hasn't been to where they are since the day it happened.

Brendon just nods and squeezes her hand. "Spencer too." He adds and this time Krissy nods.

They're silent and Krissy wonders what time it is, wonders how long they have until dawn breaks. That's the only safe time, the day. She knows that she and Brendon shouldn't even be here right now, in this abandoned park, that it's a big risk but when each day is a risk, what's one more? Besides no one would dare fuck with Brendon..not unless they had a deathwish.

"So, forever huh?" Krissy says moments later. Brendon nods, staring out at the desolate land that surrounds them. Krissy thinks about trying to sleep while they drive back through the city, so she doesn't have to see the buildings. "I guess forever is a lot easier to promise these days."

"Yeah, when your life could end tomorrow, forever is day by day but our forever...it really is forever." Brendon tells her. Again Krissy is reminded of Patrick and how everyday he would promise forever with Cassie. Krissy doesn't even think that Cassie believes in forever anymore.

A sudden beep issues from the device on Brendon's wrist. Krissy shoots up and Brendon's hand is holding her's tight. "How far away?" She asks and Brendon is studying his device.

"Couple miles...just one though...weak..should be no problem." He tells her.

Krissy nods, Brendon standing and pulling her up with him. They walk to the truck parked in the grass of the park, right where the merry-go-round used to be. Krissy wishes she didn't know what the beeping meant. She wishes that she could just sleep tonight, she wishes she could promise forever and really mean it, she wishes that this all were a movie, But she knows that wishes don't come true anymore.

The two of them get into the truck and Brendon drives fast, whipping around the dark abandoned streets. Krissy doesn't dare close her eyes, even if it means seeing the delapitated city.

"I don't mind." She says suddenly. Brendon looks at her intense and confused. "I don't mind if you're my forever either...no matter how long that forever last's."



Entry two: Lets Not fight, I'm Tired, Can't We Just Sleep Tonight?

"Brendon didn't tell me that they were leaving." Ryan says angrily from his position at the makeshift table. Cassie is looking over a paper that Gabe had given her, a list of information from the surrounding cities. Jon is sitting next to Cassie and Andy is next to Ryan.

"I wouldn't either with the way you've been on his case." Jon says and Cassie looks up briefly, her eyes flickering between Jon and Ryan. Ryan scowls at Jon.

"Well, fucking excuse me for being on his case when he's being extreamly stupid!" Ryan yells. Andy rests a hand on his shoulder and Ryan whips his head to the side, glaring at the older man. Andy just points behind them back to the closed wooden door with the stupid paper sign that read's 'infirmary'.

"Don't want to wake Pete." Andy says quietly. Ryan sighs and looks down at the horribly worn wooden table.

"They could've waited until dawn..." The brown haird boy says bitterly.

"Some people actually miss the night sky." Jon says equally as bitter as Ryan. He turns back to look at the wooden boarded up window that's located in the kitchen. Ryan sighs and looks away from Jon, his gaze moving to Cassie.

"You're being oddly quiet on this subject." He tells the girl. Cassie lifts her blue eyes to his face. Her eyes aren't warm like they used to be, haven't been since the incident.

"I'm just a tad bit busy reading about the going on's around the other cities." Her voice too is dead much like her eyes.

"You think you would be vocal about it considering what happened to Jenny." As soon as the words leave Ryan's mouth he knows they're a mistake. Cassie's eyes spark alive but with anger and Jon's hand is instantly on her shoulder.

"Fuck you Ryan! You know you're not allowed to talk about that! You're fucking not allowed to say shit about her!" Cassie is standing, her wooden chair falling to the ground behind her. She doesn't care about waking Pete up, about anyone else in this fucking hell hole hearing her. Ryan is up in a flash too, his own chair clattering to the ground behind him.

"I can talk about her! You know what Jenny was to me! You fucking know Cassie!" Ryan yells right back.

"No, you can't because what happened was your fault! It's your fault that she-" Cassie falls silent and Jon's standing and his hand is on Cassie's shoulder. She's silent and tears are leaking out of her blue eyes, eyes that only seem to variate between dead emotion and intense rage. Ryan is silent too, his hands digging into the fabric of his jeans.

"Come on Cassie, lets go. I'm sure Krissy and Brendon will be fine." Jon is leading the younger girl away, probably back to the bunk area, the tall, broad shouldered boy looks back glaring at Ryan.

Ryan notices that Andy has picked his chair back up, Cassie's too but he's gone now, out of the room. Ryan's alone in the makeshift kitchen. He can see Gabe looking at him from the living area, the older boy shakes his head and Ryan pointedly looks away from him.

Ryan's never missed Spencer more.



Entry three: You Know You're Gonna Miss This

Brendon and Krissy come back just before dawn. Ryan is still in the kitchen, fingering his mussy brown hair and pretending that he has coffee. He'll need to find someone else to ask to make the grocery run since Cassie will undoubtedly never talk to him again. It's not like fights are uncommon though, they happen a lot these days. People here tend to forgive and forget a lot, it's easy to lose yourself in the moment, say something you don't mean to someone who doesn't deserve it.

Ryan hates himself at the fact that he brought up Jenny. The girl isn't just a sore spot for Cassie, she's very much one for Ryan too. It's not like the memories of that night don't haunt Ryan too, don't make him shake while he's sleeping and wish someone would hold his hand like Jon does for Cassie.

Brendon looks over at Ryan with those hard brown eyes and sighs. "Don't bother bitching at me Ryan. I'm not in the fucking mood." Brendon says, almost as a warning. Ryan sighs and turns to the younger boy, his mouth open to say something about protecting the whole lot of them and maybe that Krissy should go and talk to Cassie but his words die on his tongue when he see's that Brendon's usually pale hands are stained red with blood.

"You encountered one?" He asks instantly worried and astonished. Brendon nods and Krissy slips past him. She's not covered in blood, she looks the same as she did when she left, all tall with blonde hair and blue eyes.

"Just one. A guy...he was really weak...a real bleeder." Brendon tells the older boy. He's almost laughing at that fact and Ryan shudders, Brendon really has changed. He's become a lot more cold hearted since all this shit went down.

"I won't bitch at you tonight because I got bitched at enough myself." The older boy informs the younger, it's a rare occurance so Brendon quirks an eyebrow and goes to wash up in the bathroom sink.

"Who bitched at you?" Krissy asks. Ryan almost doesn't want to tell her, doesn't want the blonde girl yelling at him too but he knows that she'll find out anyway.

"Cassie...and Jon."

"What'd you do?"

"Why do you assume it's me that did something?"

"Because, you get really bitchy when you're worried about one of us." The girl informs Ryan. The older boy wants to argue but he can't because it's sort of the truth.

This motely crew of people doesn't have a leader, no one is in charge but if someone had to be the mother of the group..well, that was Ryan.

"I brought up Jenny." He says weakly and Krissy's shocking blue eyes widen. She doesn't say anything else to the boy before she's racing back through the large living room and to the right to the long hall of bunks. The girl pushes open the door to the bunk room and she see's Cassie and Jon on Cassie's bunk right away. They're the only one's in the room.

They're on their knees on the bed. Jon's holding Cassie to him, his strong arms wrapped gently around her back and her soft face is burried in his shoulder. Krissy knows she's crying, this is bad, this is bad because it takes a lot to keep Cassie alright these days. Krissy finds that so disturbing because before, back then it was always Cassie holding people together but now, now she was the one who needed the support.

Krissy moves to the bunk and Jon looks up at her approaching footsteps. Cassie turns and looks at her, tears in her blue grey eyes. "Jon, can I have a minute alone with her?" Krissy asks, Jon looks up at the blonde girl, his face is blank. He looks like he would rather not leave her at all but he nods and pulls away from the girl, he's up and off the bunk and out of the room in a matter of seconds.

For a brief second Cassie is alone on the bed, crumpled in on herself, her chocolate brown head bowed, long ringlets of hair falling along her shoulder's, covering her face and her hands laying limp in her lap. "So, I guess you heard that Ryan pissed me off?" The girl's watery voice issues through the room. Krissy nods and sit's on the bed beside her friend. She moves her hand to Cassie's shoulder and gives it a squeeze.

"I shouldn't have yelled at him." Cassie says weakly.

"He shouldn't have brought her up." Krissy replies, the older girl shrugs.

"That's the thing though..are we supposed to never bring her up? Act like she never even existed? How long can I make everyone keep quiet?" Cassie says it more like she's talking to herself rather than Krissy, the blonde girl is sure that her older friend has had this conversation in her head before.

Krissy still want's to remember when life wasn't this hard. When the biggest problem they had was working one too many shift's at the supermarket or getting a low grade on a term paper. Not shit like this where they had to figure out when it was okay to talk about your dead best friend. Cassie, maybe she was getting closer to being able to talk about Jenny but then there was Patrick and the way no one talked about him...at least not around her.

"Talk about it when you're ready...I guess Ryan's ready...or he want's to act like she never left in the first place." That's all Krissy says to the girl and Cassie nods, she moves and fall's back on the small bed, Krissy moves until she's laying next to the dark haired girl. Krissy doesn' t tell Cassie about Brendon's new promise of forever, she doesn't think it's fair to remind the girl that she has the same promise that Cassie once had.



Entry four: Everyone Shakes To The Beat With A Barrel Down Their Throat

Cassie has nightmares about what happened to Jenny. She has them a lot, like it's a normal thing in her life. Really, of all the things to be normal in her oh so unnormal life, it had to be the nightmares. That's pretty much unfair.

The nightmares are too real, might as well be the same night happening over and over again. She doesn't even need the dream to remember, the memories are still embedded in her head.

They were in the middle of the city. Two streets away from where their old high school sits, broken and abandoned. It was night, of course because luno's don't come out in the day. Cassie wasn't even supposed to be at the fight, in all honesty none of them were supposed to be there. They had went for a supply run, the only still open outlet store ten minutes on the edge of the city. A stupid fucking supply run was what ended up killing her best friend.

It had been Cassie, Jenny, Ryan, Brendon, Jon, Pete and Patrick. They were riding in that stupid van that broke down a few week's after that day, the van is still broken down...Brendon, Jon, Joe, and Andy are still trying to fix it. They had made it to the outlet place, Ryan spending a good amount of the time arguing with the obnoxious sales clerk about discounts and not holding out on the good bullets.

They got ambushed on the way back to the hideout. Four of them, huge, hulking and hungry. Two alone were strong enough to knock the van onto it's side while they were still inside of it. Cassie remembers the shuddering shaking of the van, the awful gnashing noise of crunching metal and the way her heart seemed to stop.

She wasn't good at fighting, even before all this shit went down she wasn't a fighter. That's why she never went out to fight unless it was 100% necessary, that was Brendon and Pete's thing. Patrick had his arms around her as the van had flipped, the fucking thing didn't have seatbelts and they had all been slammed against the left side wall.

"Fuck...fuck! The devices didn't even go off!" Ryan was swearing as he climbed over the drivers seat, dropping back into the back.

"Gimmie a gun Jon." Brendon commands, he's eyeing the windshield, the luno's legs visible through the now cracked glass. Jon nods and he's quick, out of habit. He's digging through the brown paper bag that they just acquired with one hand and the other is sliding around the side of the van to find the gun, a task made harder now that the van had flipped postions.

Jon lifts out bullets from the bag and get's his hand on a gun, he quickly hand's them over to Brendon. The younger boy load's the gun like a flash and before anyone can say anything he's jumped over the front seat, where Ryan had been moments before and he's kicking out the already horribly cracked windshield. He's going out there alone.

"Brendon! You can't go out there alone!" Ryan is yelling and he's fishing under the drivers seat until he pulls out a gun that's preloaded, Ryan's gun..the only gun Ryan ever seem's to use. He's following Brendon out of the medium sized hole in the windshield.

Brendon is by far the best fighter amoung them. It's surprising if you knew Brendon before all the shit went down. In reality the only reason Brendon's the best fighter now is because of what happened to him...Ryan is an okay fighter, he's quick and a good shot but he's not as good as Brendon. "Ryan!" Jenny yells and she's forgotten the first rule of luno fighting, don't alert them to your presence.

Another shuddering gnashing noise is heard on the top side of the van, the side where the sliding door is. Huge thumps and dents crumple the side of the black van. Pete looks seriously over at Jon and Patrick. "Watch the girls...you know how they like girls..." Pete tells them and he too is crawling out of the window, gun already tucked into the waistband of his jeans. Even now though the fight is still four to three, they're still outnumbered.

Gunshot's resonate through the air, screams and horrible growling noises...the noises are what you never get used to...it never get's easier. Patrick has one arm wrapped around Cassie and the other is feeling for another gun, Jon's already prepared though and he hand's over a weapon to the older boy. Patrick nods, adjust's the brim of his trucker hat and glances at the broken window with worried blue eyes. Jon grab's Jenny's shoulder, pulling her until she moves away from the window, until she's almost behind him.

A thump is heard over their heads, the side of the van where no doubt a luno is standing. Several more thumps issue, dent's forming where the last luno is hitting the side of the van, trying to get to the four people inside. Cassie's not that good with a gun either. She fires if she has to but a part of her is still holding on to that normal side, that part of her that said 'I could never kill a thing.' Jenny can fire a gun, her aim isn't that great but she's better than Cassie. That's probably the reason she's asking Jon for a gun.

Jon doesn't argue, gives her one but it still looks like he hopes that she won't need it. Suddenly loud screeching is heard and they know, they know that the boys managed to kill one. The death of one luno is enough to make the other one want revenge. A clawed fist punches straight through the side of the van, pale sharply clawed hand ripping the hole bigger. Cassie will's herself not to be afraid, the luno's like when they're afraid.

Another hand join's the first and it's ripping the hole bigger, tearing through the metal of the van like it's tin foil. It's terrifying but it's not the scariest thing Cassie's ever seen, not by a long shot. Suddenly a head pops into the hole, all long dark hair and equally dark, inhuman eyes. Jon doesn't hesistate, fires a shot but the creature is quicker than they are and the luno is gone. "It will be okay." Patrick is saying, nodding his ginger colored head and gazing at the other's, Jon nods pushing his thick dark bang's out of his equally dark eyes and Cassie desperately want's to believe, that it will be, maybe back then she did believe.

The van is no longer the safest place to be. In it their cornered, an easy prey. Patrick tilts his head toward's the broken windshield, cracks spiderwebbing across the glass and the large hole Brendon had made in the middle. Jon nods and he grab's Jenny's wrist pulling her along as Patrick and Cassie move over the front seat, Patrick kicking the windshield, breaking it apart more than it already was, because not everyone is as small as Ryan and Brendon.

Patrick pulls Cassie out and Jon pulls Jenny out after them. The scene outside is much as Cassie expected but she's still not used to it. One luno is sprawled dead on the ground, managled body and horrific once human face contorted in pain. There is also a luno on top of the van, it's a male, huge, all sharp pointed angle's, dark hair and he's grinning with those sharp unhuman fang's. The luno is staring at the group of four who emerged from the van. The dark luno laughs. "Two girl's.." He says darkly.

Pete is currently scraping with a blonde luno, the creature has the short boy pinned to the ground but they all know Pete can handle himself, if he need's help he'll call for it. Brendon and Ryan are doubled up on the biggest luno, this one too has dark hair and it's huge...the biggest luno Cassie's ever seen, like a supersized body builder, impossible muscles and strength. He jumps back from Ryan and Brendon and turns to look at Cassie and Jenny, a devilish grin on his face.

"Lupe, get the girl's." The huge luno commands and Cassie can't stop the whine that releases from her throat.

Patrick pushes Cassie further back behind him, trying at least in some way to protect her. Cassie reaches out and grabs a hold of Jenny's wrist, tugging the dark haired girl closer. The younger of the two girl's is frowning, Cassie has to hand it to her that Jenny's not really that afraid of the luno's, she's staring with firey blue grey eyes and her hands are clenched into fist's. Looking back now, Cassie wishes that Jenny would've been more afraid.

"Sorry, the girl's are with us." Brendon growls out, before he circles around the creature and is tackling him to the ground.

Ryan allows himself a glance at Jenny before he clicks his gun and goes to help Brendon. Shot's ring out and another screech is emitted, followed by a cry from Pete. Patrick whips his head to look at his best friend and he see's Pete pushing the dead body of a luno off of him but he's clutching his left shoulder, blood oozing through his neon colored hoodie.

In that short amount of time, that simple mistake, that was all it took for the chain of events to start, the chain that led to Jenny's death. In that small amount of time the luno named Lupe, the one who had been on top of the van had jumped down and in a flash has scooped up Cassie, maybe because she seemed like the weaker of the two, maybe because he could sense how deeply Patrick cared about her. Cassie doesn't know.

But she's pulled away from Patrick and she's screaming and Jenny is screaming and Jon's holding firmly on to her because that guys' not grabbing her too. "Cassie!" Patrick yells, his eyes wild and Lupe is moving back to the van, holding Cassie around the waist, like she's a child, a toy, something insignificant.

Cassie thinks they would be firing, should be firing at the beast but they're not...probably because they're too afraid to hit her. If Cassie were a braver person, if she were okay with dying out here in the middle of nowhere in the dark way before her time, she might just tell them to shoot but she's not those things so she just struggles. She claws at the luno's arm, her nails digging into the pale skin of his muscled arm strong enough to draw blood but he barely bat's an impossibly dark eye.

"I'm going to get him to come over here and get me...and when I do...grab her." Jenny tells Jon. Jon shakes his dark head, that idea is way too dangerous, they could lose them both... "Just do it." Jenny grit's out and she steps forward, out from the protection of the stocky boy. "Hey!" She yell's and Cassie whip's her head up to stare at her best friend. "You must be one stupid motherfucker because you grabbed the wrong girl! I'm so much tastier than her!"

"Jenny! Stop it!" Cassie yells, struggles in the luno's iron grip but Jenny ignores her.

"Seriously, You must be as dumb as you look. You can't even pick your victim's right." That's what Jenny's good at, insulting people. If Lupe had been a normal human chances were good that he'd probably ignore what she was saying but because he's not and because luno's are so prideful he doesn't and he snarls, jumps off the van and is rushing toward's the short haired girl on the ground. Jon and Patrick are ready now, they both fire, Jon has impecible aim, Patrick's is good too and they hit him, square in the shoulder. The special bullets they had just bought used for this purpose.

The luno drops Cassie and she fall's to the ground a good distance, landing with a hard thump. Patrick looks at Jon and wait's for the older boy to nod, to tell him it's okay before he rushes to her side, she's unconcious but otherwise fine. Lupe has fallen to the ground, his left arm blown clear off by the well placed bullet to his shoulder. Jenny back's away, back's up to where Cassie is, she can watch the girl, she can watch her because Patrick need's to fight.

"I got her." She tells Patrick and he looks her over before he glances back at his unconcious girlfriend.

"Weapon?" Patrick questions, Lupe screams in pain on the ground and Ryan and Brendon had chased the huge, body builder like luno somewhere in the darker recesses of the foresty area that surround's them. Jon is aiming at Lupe's head, ready to finish it off at any moment. He should've done it already but sometimes Ryan likes to take them in for experimenting. Jenny lifts her shirt a little, just so Patrick can see the gun she has tucked away, the one Ryan has her carry. Patrick nods, his medium length gingery blonde hair brushing against his shoulder's before he stands looking around for any sign of Ryan and Brendon. He finds none and promptly goes over to where Pete is sitting on the ground, still clutching at his arm.

"Did it bite you?" He asks, worry heavy in his voice for his best friend. Pete's sweaty, his jagged black bang's falling into his dark eyes, he's in obvious pain but he just shakes his head.

"No...damn thing stabbed me...it's nails were sharp as fuck." Pete pant's out. He laughs barely and stands on shaky leg's. He's leaning against Patrick heavily and the younger boy moves his best friend over to where Cassie is laying still out cold on the ground. 'Two in the infirmary.' Patrick thinks as Pete sinks back down by the girl's.

"Where the hell are Ryan and Bren...and that huge fucking luno?" Jon wonders outloud, he's scanning the darkness around them. They've been gone too long but he's not going to say that. Lupe laughs from the ground.

"Your friends are dead...Henry killed them, he's probably eating them as we speak and then when he get's back...the rest of you will be dead." Lupe says, his voice is weak but still has an aire of suppirority to it.

"Shut the fuck up!" Jenny snaps from her spot next to Cassie and Pete. Lupe turn's his head and glares at the girl, his eyes dark.

"I'll tell him to kill you last...that girl is first..." Lupe says, his eyes trailing to Cassie's passed out form. "I bet she taste's delicious."A gun shot echoes through the night and Lupe is sporting a shiny new head wound thanks to a scowling Patrick. He doesn't give a damn if Ryan wanted to experiment on this one.

There's silence among them. They're just waiting, waiting for their friend's to return. Ryan and Brendon had chased the huge luno into the small but dense area of forest that surrounded the right side of the road they were traveling down, they hadn't come back yet so they were just waiting, waiting for them..or waiting for Henry to come back, or waiting that alotted amount of time that they all stick to. The rule that says 'If I'm not back in an hour..leave.' It's a rule they've never had to use. They don't really want to start now.

"Should we call back up?" Jenny asks, Patrick shakes his head.

"No..but I'm thinking that maybe Jon and I ought to go try and find Ryan and Brendon" Patrick says. He figures if they need help they should be there. Four against one seem's like pretty fucking good odds, no matter how big that creature is. "Pete..think you can still protect the girl's if things go bad?" Patrick adds and Pete nods.

"I can shoot a gun with one hand you know." He states but he's looking a little pale...he's probably losing a lot of blood. Patrick nods and he looks at Jon, the younger boy also nods and they head off to the left, circling around the way they think Brendon and Ryan went.

"Andy's gonna be pissed that you hurt yourself again." Jenny says to Pete. She's not looking at the boy, chosing to look down at her best friend. She's ignoring the fact that she's fucking terrified that somethings happened to Ryan.

"Ryan's fine you know?" He replies and she looks up at him.

"Yeah, I know I just-" Jenny never does get to finish that sentence because at that moment faster than any human can see, the built luno Henry is dashing out of the dark and he has Pete by his throat..he's obviously looking for a quick kill. "No!" Jenny screams and she pulls out her gun and lunges herself at Henry's body. She's on his back as he wraps his insanely strong hands around Pete's throat, intent on breaking his neck. Jenny presses her gun to the luno's shoulder, away from Pete and fires, it doesn't do much but it's enough to get him to let go of Pete.

Instead he grabs at Jenny, get's her wrist and flip's her over him, slamming her to the ground. Jenny sit's up weak, pne hand digging into the dirty ground to keep her balanced as she fires again, hit's him in the stomach but she doesn't have the special bullets like Jon and Patrick had, her's are normal and less effective. Henry is annoyed now and he get's up off of Pete, stalks toward's Jenny and fuck, wouldn't you know it that Jenny's pretty sure her leg is broken. She back's away but it's not like it's doing any good. Cassie's unconcious and Pete's gun is who the fuck knows where..who can help her?

She empties the rest of her round, hit's him in the arms and neck and stomach but he's huge and they might as well be bee stings to the luno. "You're very annoying." He tells Jenny before he has her up by her shirt collar and he throws her back, she goes flying through the night air, back, back, back, until she hit's the brick wall of a abandoned building. Fuck now she can't move at all.

Henry goes back to Pete, to kill Pete and Jenny can't move..she wonders where Ryan is, if she can see him because her vision is getting fuzzy. That hit probably rattled her brain. It's so fucking weird to her, to think that five months ago she was in college and she and Ryan were arguing about what color to paint the fucking kitchen of their apartment...Jenny would pretty much give anything to be able to argue about paint again...

Cassie wakes up on the ground, her head is killing her and she's pretty sure her wrist is broken but what worries her more is that she's alone...she sit's up and an instant pain shoot's through her arm. yes, her wrist is broken. She does quickly realize that she isn't alone..she can see that huge luno a few feet from her and he has someone pinned under him..someone that kind of looks like Pete. Fuck! Fuck! He's going to kill Pete...Cassie doesn't know where the others are but she can't just sit there...it's then that she spots a black handgun on the ground by her foot...Pete's gun. It's in her hand and she scoot's closer, she can hear choking noises, Pete's slowing being strangled to death.

"Get off of him!" She screams and she points the weapon at the beast, she has to use both arms to hold the gun, her broken wrist throbbing in pain. Cassie closes her eyes and squeezes the trigger. The noise resonates and she feels the vibrations through her arms, sending little streaks of pain through her.

Her eyes flutter open and she see's that huge luno has fallen over, away from Pete...it's not the first time Cassie's shot a gun...but it is the first time that she's killed someone...something on purpose.

She get's up on shaky leg's and makes it all the way to Pete before she can't walk anymore and fall's to her knees beside him. Her good hand comes to rest on his tanned neck, feeling for a pulse and she's relieved when she feels one..low but there. She scans the grounds and wonder's where Jenny is...where Patrick and Jon and Ryan and Brendon are. Why is she all alone?

Moments later voices emerge from the darkness and it's Ryan and Brendon, Patrick and Jon. Ryan is limping and Brendon's got blood on his forehead. Jon's hand is cut up and Patrick's clothes are ripped. Cassie breaks down in tears when she see's them...she had been thinking the worst...but they're okay...

"You're alive..." She says, her voice rough.

"Cassie!" Patrick replies, surprised to see that his girlfriend is up and moving. The ginger haired boy rushes over to her as quick as his injuries allow.

"That fuck got away from us!" Brendon seeths but he's scanning her and Pete and Henry's body on the ground. "What the fuck happened?" He asks, noticing the scene for the first time and souding alarmed.

"I don't know...I woke up and that thing was choking Pete...so..so I shot it." She sobs out and Patrick is falling next to her, arms wrapped around her.

"Where's Jenny?" Ryan says, his voice soft yet alarmed and Cassie whips her head up to look at him.

"She's not with you?" Her voice is high and her heart stops...Jenny, where is Jenny?

Ryan looks pale, like he's going to puke and she knows that the two of them are having the same thoughts.

"Ryan...over here." Brendon is saying he's turning and racing back so many feet away to a broken down brick wall.

They find Jenny there, slumped against the wall, alive but barely. Ryan scoops her up but he can't carry her due to his ankle, Brendon take's her instead, carries her back to where Cassie and Pete are.

"Oh my god.! Jenny...Jenny? Are you alright?" Cassie is crying and cradling her best friend's face in her hands. Jenny is unconcious, can't anwser the other girl.

"Brendon...Can you get the van upright again?" Jon is asking...he's offically in charge now...he has to be...Brendon nods and moves to the van.

They're driving and it's a fucking miracle that the van even work's anymore. The windshield is desimated, there's a gaping hole in the side but it runs and Jon is driving. Cassie's on the floor of the van, next to the long seat where Jenny is laying...they determined that she's worse off than Pete..Pete is laying in the back seat, Brendon in the passenger, Ryan up on the seat beside his girlfriend and Patrick on the floor next to his.

Jenny wakes up when they put her in the van. She says it's hard for her to breath. Cassie is talking to her first because Ryan can't...he can't because he blames himself..

"Cassie...you're alright...fuck, I'm glad." Apparently Jenny had been thinking the worse about her best friend but know it seemed that their roles were reversed.

"Yeah," Cassie is smiling through tears as her best friend looks up at her. "I'm alright thanks to you...you saved my life."

"You're my best friend..." Jenny responds, Cassie nods.

"And you're mine...best friend's forever right?" Cassie says and Jenny tries to laugh but coughs instead and Cassie ignores the fact that blood comes up when she does.

"Forever." Jenny agrees weakly. Cassie can barely stand to see her like this, Jenny was always acting so strong, tough and untouchable but now...she was broken..falling apart right before their eyes.

"It's okay Jenny..we're almost home...we're almost back and when we get back we'll sit in the infirmary and drink orange juice alright? And we'll tell stupid stories about when we were kid's and I fell in the creek...remember that?"

"Yeah...you got so mad."

"Yeah..." Cassie doesn't know what to say to her best friend, she knows what she need's to say though. "I love you Jenny..." Cassie doesn't want to say it but that's another rule they have...if you think someone isn't going to make it...tell them you love them while you can...Cassie hopes that Jenny doesn't remember that rule.

"I love you too...And you better fucking write a story about this someday and I better get a dedication and an autographed copy..." Jenny trails off and Cassie laughs but she want's it to happen...for what Jenny says to be the truth. Cassie leans down and kisses Jenny's bloodstained cheek before she turns away and cries silent into Patrick's shoulder, her face pressed against his reddish blonde hair.

Ryan moves so he's leaning over his girlfriend, like he's done a million times before..but it's never felt as important as this.

"Hi, baby..." Jenny says, so weak..so quiet...so unlike herself.

"Hi." Ryan replies and he run's a large hand across her cheek.

"Your hands are warm..." She notes and Ryan laughs weakly, he ignores that his hands are so warm because she's so cold.

"Jenny...I'm sorry...I should've stopped him before he got to you...I shouldn't have let any of this happen...I was supposed to keep you safe...I'm such a stupid fuck.."

"Stop it Ry..." Jenny starts and she coughs again, more blood and Jon drives a little faster. "I did it because I had to...I fought because I wanted to...there was no way I couldn't...I knew what coming along meant...I knew the risk..don't blame yourself."

"You'll be okay." Ryan promises, his voice is breaking...it feels like Spencer all over again. "You'll be okay Jenny and I don't care what Andy says...I'm going to be right next to you in that infirmary bed."

"You better fake an injury..." She tells him and he grins just a little "Ryan...I want you to know something though..." She starts. "I've loved you from the first day I met you...never wanted to be away from you. You're the greatest thing that ever happened to me and my entire life has had meaning because I got to be with you....I love you more than anything."

No, Ryan wouldn't do this because this, because this felt like a goodbye...like the one Spencer gave him before he died. "Don't say stuff like that...don't say it like it's over...because it's not! You're going to be fine Jenny...you will..." Ryan didn't know who he was trying to convince more, her or himself.

"I know..." Jenny says like she doesn't actually believe that she'll be fine. "But what if I forget?" Cassie looks at Ryan briefly, he knows why she's looking..because even though she want's the girl to make it..can't fathom it any other way...she still knows that Ryan need's to say whatever he thinks he should say..just incase.

"You're the best thing that ever happened to me Jenny...you made my life so bearable, you picked me up when I thought I couldn't go on...you mean the world to me and listen to me.." He says and he leans over and brushes his lips against her's. "When you recover...I'll buy you a ring...one to match Cassie's okay?"

"I want one better than Cassie's." Jenny deadpans and how like the girl that even when she's hurt she can still joke...

"Okay, whatever you want...you'll get it when you're better." Ryan promises and he kisses her again.

Jenny never did get a ring.

They get back to the hideout. Ryan limping into the building following Jon as he carries Jenny. Patrick is carrying Cassie and Brendon carrying Pete. Everyone is awake when they enter, ready to berate them for being late but their words fall dead when they see their three wounded comrades.

It's an instant bussle to the infirmary. It's shitty and makeshift run only by Andy and Ryland. They go to work on Jenny first, Andy making Ryan and the others wait outside because of what happened after Patrick...well, no one's allowed in there anymore.

Cassie's let out of the infirmary first. After fifteen minutes, a wrist brace and bandages around various spots on her body. Patrick and Andy tell her to go to bed but she won't, not until Jenny wakes back up.

Pete has to spend the night in the infirmary because his right arm is fucked and he's going to have to work so hard to get it to even work normally again. They're still waiting for Jenny to wake back up. Krissy had come down and sat next to Cassie at the warped table, held the girl's good hand as she waited.

An hour and a half after they got home Andy comes out and his scruffy face is grim. He tells them that the blast against the wall broke Jenny's ribs and that one said rib punctured her liver and kidney..that without transplant's she's going to die...the girl lost an incredible amount of blood as well so even if they do get a transplate for two vital organs within five hours there's still a chance that she'll die. He tells them that the girl has slipped into a coma and her heart rate is dropping.

Cassie is sobbing against the table...unconsolable sobs that wreck everyone around them. Ryan drops to his knees and burries his face in his hands. He knew it all along, he knew she wouldn't make it. He thinks even she knew...that's why she said what she did....

"There's nothing you can do?" Ryan asks and Andy shakes his head. Ryan shakes his too but more angry. "No! Fuck you! No! You're not trying hard enough! You're just giving up on her! She can make it but you just don't want to try!" Ryan is screaming, screaming at the top of his lungs and no one's stopping him...

They let Krissy and Cassie go in and say goodbye. Cassie can't think of what to say just hold's Jenny's hand and cries. Krissy isn't much better. They say fragile goodbyes, Cassie thinks it's fucked up that when it's time to say goodbye, nothing feels right, nothing feels good enough to be the final words you say to someone. She tells Jenny she loves her, she promises she'll take care of Ryan..she promises to see the girl again.

Ryan get's to say his goodbye alone. No one knows what he said, Cassie still hasn't asked him, she probably never will. Ryan's goodbye was probably perfect, probably just what her best friend wanted and she prayed to god that the girl heard it.

Jenny dies at ten in the morning. There's no time for a long funeral. Andy and Patrick, Gabe and Brendon, Krissy and Jon go out to help bury the girl. Cassie doesn't go, she can't, she can't do it.

She just lay's in the bunk waits for Patrick to come back, wait's for him to get out of the shower and hold her until she fall's asleep. She turn's the other way, to the left to avoid seeing Jenny's bunk that's right beside her's.

It's the hardest thing Cassie's ever had to live through. The hardest thing she thinks she'll ever go through. That is..until Patrick died.



Entry five: You Said You Would Die For Me, Now You Must Live For Me Too

Brendon get's out of the shower to find Krissy laying in Cassie's bunk. The sleeping room is small so it's not like anyone has any privacy anyway. He pad's over, he's wearing nothing but shorts and his short black hair is dripping wet. His and Krissy's bunk is only a couple down from where Cassie sleep's.

"Hey, how is she?"Brendon asks as he comes to stand infront of Cassie's bunk.

The dark haired girl is turned on her side, fast asleep. Krissy looks over at her before she returns her gaze to Brendon. "She's alright now...she just needed someone to comfort her." The blonde girl tells her boyfriend. Brendon nods and offers out his hand.

"Come on, lets go to sleep." He tells her. Krissy's bright blue eyes sweep over the boy's body, Brendon knows what she's looking at, she ignores it most of the time but occasionally she does look at it, the jagged mark that decorates his shoulder. Her eyes fall back to his face and she nods, taking his hand and stands, follow's Brendon back to their bunk.

They lay together, curled in and soft, Krissy's head on his pale chest and her hands around his waist. It's a little after eight in the morning. Ever since the luno outbreak, ever since things went completely insane, they've been sleeping like them, sleep during the day, hunt at the night, though they're hunting for two completely different reason's.

Krissy is asleep first but Brendon's awake, still wired from the luno fight he had gotten in before they got back here. The guy had been too easy to kill. Brendon surprisingly doesn't feel bad for the creatures, not anymore, not after all the things he saw. Not after he lost friend's to them. He can't feel bad for killing things that deserve it. Footsteps issue through the hall and into the long bunk room. Brendon turn's his head, they all sleep in the same room so it could be anyone.

It's Jon though. The older boy stops and eyes Brendon and Krissy. Brendon can feel the older boy's stare on his shoulder and maybe it's been awhile since he's walked around with no shirt on. Jon's eyes move back to Brendon's face.

"She okay?" Jon asks and Brendon knows he's not talking about Krissy.

"Yeah, Krissy says she just needed some comfort."

Jon nods. "That's good." He looks over at Cassie who is asleep and Brendon sighs.

"Be careful Jon." The younger boy says suddenly. Jon looks up with questioning deep brown eyes.

"What do you mean?" Jon kind of knows what Brendon means but just incase he want's to hear him say it.

"She's not over Patrick." Brendon says overly blunt. Jon kind of misses back when Brendon wasn't so straightforward. Jon's eyes widen just a bit and he looks away from the younger boy.

"I know."

"They were married for god's sake."

"I said I know." Jon repeats. He doesn't need Brendon telling him things that he's long since figured out. "It doesn't matter, I'm not doing anything wrong. I'm just keeping my promise to Patrick." Jon tells him. It's the truth, it's all he's doing. Or at least that's what he tells himself. "She just need's someone to be there for her." Jon add's as he moves away from Brendon, away from the sleeping Krissy and he goes to his bunk, the one to the left of Cassie's.

He eye's the girl, she's a light sleeper and he's hoping that she didn't wake up when he and Brendon were arguing. Jon tries to sit on his bed and just relax, just go to sleep but he can't, he still can't fucking get used to sleeping during the day. He feels nervous, he feels exposed, he feels like Brendon's watching every move he's making. Jon is restless and he stands, move's to Cassie's bunk, pulls the worn blanket up over her. It doesn't matter that she always kicks the blanket off before she wakes up.

Jon moves back to his own bunk. He feels wound up and pissed off. He's pissed that Ryan had upset her, that he brought Jenny up. They were all there that night, he didn't need to bring it up. He's upset because he and Cassie had actually been having a good day, one where he had managed to make her laugh and there was no talk about luno's or hunting. Jon really wishes he could get in a fight, fight like Brendon does, to let off all that excess energy. Jon's not the best fighter but he also doesn't completely suck.

The boy leans down and pushes his bunk, pushes till it slides across the hard wooden floor, he's thankful for the wheel's so he can avoid that awful scraping noise. Jon pushes his bunk until it bumps against Cassie's until the two small bed's make one big one. Jon gets into his own bunk but he doesn't feel tired. He glances to his left to see Brendon is looking down the line of bunk's, watching him with intent dark eyes. Jon looks away, to the right. To Cassie and she's still asleep. Jon end's up on his back, staring at the warped wooden ceiling.

Jon knows that Cassie loved Patrick, that she still loves him even though he's dead. Being dead isn't a palable reason to stop loving someone, Jon knows that. He knows that Cassie loved him because yeah, they were married. She still wears that ring on her finger, black and shining and glaring in Jon's eyes. She doesn't talk about Patrick much anymore, sometimes she does, whispers small things that she remembers about him, maybe just to prove that she remembers, or maybe just so that by telling someone, she's ensuring that Patrick lives on.

Jon tells himself that he only pushed their bunk's together because Cassie has a bad tendancy to roll around in her sleep and she might fall off the bed. He tells himself that he only cares as much as he does because he's keeping his promise to Patrick.

That's what Jon tells himself so he can sleep at night.



Entry six: I Will Never Let You Fall

Ryan's up before the whole lot of them. He's never been one to sleep in and the near constant worry about luno attack's has him cutting his sleep down even further. He didn't bother to sleep in the bunk room last night. He didn't know who might still be pissed off at him about the whole yelling at Cassie thing. The girl didn't deserve it, he knows that. Ryan slept in the broken down recliner in what could barely be considered a living area. Ryland sometimes sleeps there but Ryan got there first last night..morning, whatever.

Cassie's in the kitchen an half an hour after Ryan's been up. Apparently she's looking for the paper she had last night. The one with all the information the surrounding cities had sent to Gabe. She spot's Ryan and her gaze lowers to the dirty floor. Ryan can cut the tension with a knife.

He's the guy and it is his fault, he yelled at her so it's only right if he apologizes. "Cassie...look I'm sorry." Cassie looks up at him like she doesn't want to deal with his crap.

"Don't apologize for something you can't change." Is her reply, Ryan sighs.

"Just because it can't be changed doesn't mean I should've said it."

"And I shouldn't have caused a scene like that." She admits, spotting the paper under the table and bending to retrive it. Cassie give's Ryan a look before she turns and makes an attempt to flee from the room.

"Cassie, wait!" Ryan says, he sounds exasperated. He grab's Cassie's arm, stopping her from leaving. She turn's back to look at him, unsure like she want's to get away from him. "Look...can you just sit down for a second?" He's desperate and she knows it so, she sighs and slips from the boy's grasp and to warily at the table. Ryan sits too, across from the girl.

"Look." He starts again, his head is bowed, his mussy brown bang's falling into his light brown eyes. He wind's his long fingers together as he starts talking. "I don't know what made me say that last night...but I'm telling you that I didn't mean it...it's not easy for me either Cassie...she was your best friend but she was my world..."

"I know...maybe that's why it pissed me off..because it should've hurt you to say that...I guess I just thought you stopped caring." Cassie's not looking at him, her soft eyes downcast. Ryan reaches out and places his hand over hers. The boy shakes his head.

"I can't ever stop caring. Seven months and it never get's easier...I still feel like it was my fault..every day of my life."

"Ryan..it wasn't your fault." She's heard him say this before, they've had this conversation before. It doesn't matter how many times she tells him Jenny's death wasn't his fault, he never believes it. Ryan withdraws his hand.

"Yeah, it was...if I hadn't let that luno get away...it wouldn't have attacked Pete, Jenny wouldn't have went after it...she wouldn't have had to die...it's my fault. It's because I'm weak."

Cassie stands, move's over to Ryan and rest's her hands on his thin, bony shoulders. "She wouldn't blame you. I know she wouldn't and I know that she loved you more than anything else in this world. Jenny would do anything for you...and I know she definitly wouldn't want you to spend the rest of your life blaming yourself for her death."

Ryan sighs and relaxes under her touch, it reminds him briefly of Jenny. Ryan also notices something as her hand slips away from his shoulder, how the black ring on her finger still shines.

"Do you still blame yourself for Patrick?" He asks, he doesn't want to start a whole nother argument with this question but if she doesn't blame herself for his death anymore..he'd really like to know how to get beyond that. Cassie freezes at his question. The look in her eyes, Ryan knows that she hasn't.

"You're right. It never get's easier." She replies and just as quickly she leaves the kitchen. Probably off to talk to Gabe about the information they had gathered.

Ryan sighs and wishes he had been as smart as Patrick, that he had bought a ring for Jenny. Though it's quite possible that Patrick had the ring before the world changed but the boy isn't sure. He still remembers when the two got married. It had been before they found this hideout, when they were still on the run and nowhere was safe.

They had been at this little church, hidden in the back with luno's all around the outside of the church. They were all crammed into the small room, along with people who were from the church, people who were dying. Ryan remembers because he had been awake, one of the few of them who were...it was long before they had Gabe and his crew, long before they had the others. It had just been Ryan, Jenny, Cassie, Patrick, and a few scattered others.

Ryan had been leaning against the hard wall, Jenny's asleep with her head in his lap, Ryan's hand carding through her soft, short dark hair. Cassie and Patrick had been pressed close together against the other wall, holding hands, watching the people around them.

"I'm scared, Trick." She had whispered it, these things, she only felt safe telling him. She'd probably never tell anyone else that she was afraid, that she was more scared than she ever felt in her entire life.

"I know." Patrick brushed his hand along her cheek, pushing the wave of long, curly dark hair out of her face.

"I'm worried about my family..."

"They'll be okay..we'll be okay." Patrick was always really good at making promises, Ryan thinks that the boy believed he could actually keep them.

"If I lost you, Patrick...I don't know what I'd do." She was desperate to hold on to him, like if she released him he'd fade away. Patrick leaned forward and he kissed her soft on the forehead. Ryan tried to act like he wasn't watching this intimate scene being displayed but he'd rather not look at the people dying around him.

"You won't...look." Patrick starts and he leans away, hands digging into the pocket of his worn jean's. He removes his hand and take's Cassie's again. "This isn't really how I wanted to do this...but I bought this ring before the whole world went to shit.." The boy is saying and he open's his hand revealing a small black jeweled ring.

Cassie's and Ryan's eyes both widen drastically. "What?...What are you doing?" Cassie stutters and Patrick smiles.

"Will you marry me?" He whispers, Cassie's hand comes to cover her mouth and Patrick take's her other in his tight. It's not the ideal situation, not any kind of place she expected to get purposed to but she doesn't care because it's Patrick, it's a ring but more importantly, it's a promise.

"Yes..." Cassie breathes out and Patrick leans forward, kisses her softly and slides the black jeweled ring around her finger. Ryan thinks it's a grand gesture but how does he really expect them to get married...then it dawns on him...they're in a church.

Patrick finds the preist asks him to perform the simplest of ceremonies. Ryan wind's up being the witness and Patrick and Cassie got married that night, standing next to long glowing candles and despite the enviroment it's actually kind of romantic. It was just like that, they were married, committed to each other in an instant and Ryan should've done it too..but he was still hoping, hoping that things would go back and be normal. That he and Jenny could go back to their little apartment that they had just finished painting and he would let her paint it black if she wanted..it didn't matter anymore.

But now Patrick was dead and Cassie was a twenty three year old widow. Now Ryan was all alone, now Brendon was the only person who had love in this entire fucking house. Maybe that's why Ryan yell's at him so much, because maybe Brendon is taking every moment for granted. Doesn't he know just how quick you can lose that person? The person who makes the world complete.

Ryan stands and grab's his jacket off the coat hanger by the door.

He's going to see Jenny.



Entry Seven: Calm Before The Storm

Pete wake's up in the infirmary. It's the third time this month. This time he busted his wrist, threw a wrong punch against a paticularly thick skinned luno, busted it right away. It's like he's a walking reminder, a body full of battle scars. His right arm is still jacked from the night Jenny died, he's got a deep jagged slit down his left leg from where a luno tried to eat it. Pete's got a million tiny scars along his body, one's that Ashlee would only ever really see.

The boy is horribly bored, the too clean room is mind numbing and Pete need's to get out, fuck what Andy says.

He stands and ambles out of the bed, against the cool tiled floor. He props the door open and slips out easily. It's quiet, people are still probably sleeping, but Pete's insomnia doesn't just cure itself, he's just gone from not sleeping at night to not sleeping at day.

People say that Pete took to this whole thing too easily, well, that's at least what Patrick used to say. Maybe it was because Pete never felt normal, never felt right in his old life. This life felt easier in a way, it was fucked up but Pete's mind was made for this world, it was just horrible that no one elses was.

The man peek's into the bunk area and a good amount of them are full, Patrick and Cassie's shared bunk is empty though as is Ryan's and the one he thinks might be Gabe's. Pete back's out of the bunk area and goes around the corner into the living area, no one is here either..but than again no one is ever in here. All that resides in this room is a tiny black and white tv, that picks up static half the time, two broken down recliners and an equally trashed couch. But really what can you expect when everything you get is from the trash?

There's a set of stairs against the back wall and Pete takes them, heading to the upper floor. Upstairs are two rooms, a bathroom, and an attic with a window that's perfect for scoping the boundaries of the city. Pete pulls an instant left, already hearing the boisterous voice of Gabe from the room beside the attic.

Inside the room it's just Cassie, Gabe, Nate, and Alex. They're scattered around in the odd little seats, The incredibly tall form of Gabe , that Pete used to be jealous of, is standing, leaning over Cassie and pointing out information on a crumpled piece of white paper.

"Weekly report?" Pete asks from the doorway and the people in the room look up.

"Yeah." Gabe replies. His light brown eyes slide down to the paper before he looks back up at Pete. "There's been an increase in luno's in the northern area." He sighs, and run's a hand through short black hair. Pete feels a rush of excitment and a ball of dread drop into his stomach. The northern area isn't too far from here. Pete like's fighting even if no one else does, maybe he's just blood thirsty because of what happened to Patrick.

"There's also a shipment of those burn bullets coming into the outlet on Friday." Alex says from his position near the window. Alex with his pale skin and light brown hair, Pete's glad someone is keeping track of the days because god knows he isn't.

"Rag says that rumor is the luno's are going to try and steal the supply." Nate add's, glancing at Pete. Nate is the only person in the house whose shorter than Pete. Pete makes a face.

"How? Isn't it a daylight delivery?" Pete asks and Cassie's looking up at him, pushes a strand of brown hair behind her ear.

"Well, chances are that by the time it get's to the outlet it will be twilight." She tells him and Pete sighs.

"We'd be pretty screwed without those bullets. The luno's are huge lately." Alex tells him and Pete scrubs a hand over his face.

"Nate you mentioned the rag?" He asks and Nate nods, stands and hand's over a folded paper.

The rag is the only news source left in the areas, it's faxed along with the weekly reports to all known human hideout's. Pete's a big reader of the rag as are Nate, Gabe and Alex. Nate and Alex really help keep things running smoothly in the hideout. Pete might be good at fighting but he's crap at that sort of shit so really, everyone is valuable.

Pete leans against the doorframe and read's the few other news articles mentioned in the paper. There's not much else but Pete really want's to take it upon himself to volunteer to go and make sure the delivery happens smoothly.

"You want to take it don't you?" Gabe asks and he's smiling and leaning against a chair. It seem's like he's the only one who smiles these days, Pete nods.

"Only because I know we can handle it." He retort's.

"I don't know Pete...the luno's know that those burn bullets are super effective against them. I think they'd pull out all the stops to destroy them." Cassie's is saying, her blue eyes burning into Pete's and Nate and Alex are nodding.

"You don't think we can win?"

"I don't think you should go volunteering to fight...this isn't a game Pete." Cassie says, her voice raising. Pete rolls his eyes.

"I don't need you telling me what to do."

"Then don't go get anyone else involved...don't talk Brendon into it if he doesn't want to go." Cassie tells him firmly. Pete thinks that Cassie spent way too much time with Patrick because she sound's just like him. He want's to tell the girl as much but he's not Ryan Ross, he won't say it outloud.

"Brendon likes to fight." Pete points out. Cassie looks away from him.

"That doesn't mean that he should...he has someone who depends on him. He can't go do something stupid like getting himself killed and leaving Krissy all alone."

It's pretty damn obvious to Pete that Cassie isn't really talking about Brendon. She's talking about Patrick, about the way the boy was sure he'd be fine, that they were strong enough to take down anyone. How he did something stupid and she got left alone. Her eyes are heavy and she's pretending to look at the paper but she's not, she's looking at her wedding ring.

Pete makes a small noise but doesn't say anything. He can say anything but regardless of his own opinions, Cassie was his best friend's girl and even though Patrick never asked, Pete took it upon himself to look after her after his death. Pete opens his mouth to say something but Gabe and Alex look at him like that wouldn't be the best idea in the world so he just allows his mouth to drop closed before he leans over, kisses Cassie on the forehead before he leaves the room.

He'd rather die before letting Brendon.

Despite Cassie's words Pete does go to Brendon. The boy is still asleep, Krissy wrapped around him, her hand covering the jagged wound that almost, almost matches the one on Pete's leg but yet is completely different. Pete leans down and pokes the younger boy in the side. Brendon moves his head but doesn't wake up. Pete pokes again. And this time Brendon's brown eyes flicker open, slit's against the dim light of the room.

It's a few hours to twilight and Pete likes to wake everyone up before that time, just in case they miss the sun.

"Time?" Brendon asks.

"Four."

Brendon groans and looks down at Krissy. "Baby."

"I know." Krissy says, her eyes still closed.

"What do you want Wentz?" Pete's staring at Brendon, trying so hard to see that kid he met at Ryan's place, the kid that almost rivaled Patrick with his singing voice, the kid who was so childlike. He's pretty sure that that Brendon doesn't exist anymore, or if he does he's only seen by the girl wrapped in Brendon's arms.

"Got the rag this morning."

"Need a tampon?"

Pete allows himself a laugh and Brendon smirks, his smile only slightly distorted.

"No, I'm good but look, rumor has it that some luno's are wanting to destroy a shipment of burn bullets that are being delivered on Friday to the outlet." Brendon makes a noise of reconition. "So, I was wondering if you wanted in on it? Wanted to go and fight with me?" Brendon has one eye open, and he's watching Pete. That's the only annoying thing about being the best fighter is that people know you're the best fighter and they constantly need you.

"You think you need me?" Brendon asks, Pete can see Krissy's fingers running softly along the boy's side and Cassie's words go floating through his head. He shrugs, gives no yes or no anwser, he want's to let Brendon decide, he won't be the death of anyone, not anyone who doesn't deserve it.

"It's up to you man." Pete replies. Brendon sit's up a bit, Krissy sliding off his chest but her hands are still on his skin. Brendon nods after a moment and Pete smiles a tight smile, chances are good that Cassie will be pissed when she finds out but at least he didn't talk the other boy into it. Pete turns to leave the room when another voice issues through the room.

"I want to go too." Pete turns back at the voice. "I want to fight with you."

Jon's sitting up and looking at Pete with hard eyes, so unlike his usual warm brown stare. Pete just nods and yeah, Cassie will kill him herself but he didn't say a word to Jon, even as he leaves the room.

Ryan enters the kitchen an hour later through the back door to find Krissy in there. His face is all pale and sullen. She's eating some kind of soup or something, whatever food they have left but she looks up at him with wide eyes.

"What's wrong Ry?"

Ryan is silent as his thin frame fall's into a chair across from Krissy. He's sweating and shaking and he knows he looks a mess, hasn't looked as bad since the night after Jenny died.

"What happend Ryan?" Krissy's standing because this is emergency behavior, this is somethings wrong behavior and he fucking need's to tell her what it is right this second. Ryan stares up at her with shocked eyes.

"It's gone..."

"What Ryan...what's gone?" The blonde girl is alarmed now, her peace that she obtained with Brendon shattered. Anything was possible in this world, anything could be wrong.

"Jenny's body...it's gone..."



Entry eight: She's A Natural Disaster

"What?...What?" Krissy falls back into the chair she had just been inhabiting. Ryan's small body is shaking still and he wishes they had coffee..he misses coffee.

"I went to the grave site..I went just to see her you know? Tell her that I was sorry, tell her that I was trying to move on. But my foot hit the grave and then it just collapsed...the whole fucking thing collapsed and it was empty..no casket, no body, nothing..." Ryan's voice breaks off and he's looking down. Krissy shakes her head.

"How? How does this kind of thing happen?" She doesn't know, she doesn't know enough about luno's, about this world to know how this could happen. She feels sick though and her first thought is to tell Cassie but at the same time she doesn't want to say a word to the girl.

"I was reading...reading about this thing that luno's can do. I can't remember what it's called anymore but it's something where they steal the bodies of human's..." Ryan trails off and Krissy swallows hard. Her imagination is terrfying, showing her a variety of things that could be happening to Jenny's body right now.

"What do they do with them?" The blonde girl whispers because Ryan's offered no further explaination. He's still not looking at her.

"They do something...I don't know what but they change them, make them come back to life." Ryan's head lifts now and Krissy's icy blue eyes spark. "But they're not human when they come back." He add's and it kill's that little shred of hope that Krissy had just let enter her and just like that it was gone. Ryan's voice is hurt, oozing pain.

"What are they?" Krissy has tears in the corners of her eyes. She doesn't want this to happen. Haven't they hurt enough? Wasn't putting Jenny in the ground once enough?

"They turn into luno's...like them." Ryan tells her and his own dull eyes spark with tears, he's trying desperately to hide that fact. He shakes his head. "I need more information. I'm just..I don't know what to do." He whispers and Krissy nods. Ryan sound's so lost, so desperate and heartbroken that it's killing her. "Just...just don't tell Cassie okay? She doesn't need to know about this right now." Again Krissy nods and even though it kill's her that she has to keep it from the girl, she knows it's what's right.

"Ryan..." Krissy starts after a moment of shared silence. The boy looks up at her with questioning eyes. "What about Patrick and Spencer?" Ryan's heart drops straight to his feet and he's grabbing his jacket, racing out the door with Krissy hot on his heel's.

Cassie comes downstairs five minutes after Pete had left from there. She really need's to talk to Ryan about making a grocery run before the sun goes down. The only problem is that she can't find the boy. Normally she wouldn't ask permission but since the van's broken down, all they have is the truck so outing's need to be checked with everyone and today it happens that Ryan has the key's to the truck.

The dark haired girl goes into the bunk room expecting Ryan but instead she finds Pete, Brendon, and Jon huddled around a bunk, discussing something. They're talking in quiet voices, Jon and Brendon lift their heads and the talking ceases immediently. Pete turn's around and spot's her and mumbles a quiet swear.

"Anyone seen Ryan?" She asks and all three boy's shake their heads.

"I thought I heard his voice in the kitchen a second ago." Brendon tells her but Cassie shakes her head.

"I just looked in there." She's watching them. "What are you guys' doing?" Cassie asks, she's leaning against the doorframe, she doesn't look supicious, maybe just curious, maybe trying for a light mood considering the past few days had been stressful.

"We're discussing that burn bullet run for Friday." Jon tells her. Pete's never wanted to slap someone so badly in his life. It's not really the younger boy's fault though, Pete didn't tell him not to say anything. Pete turn's back to look at her and her face is oddly blank.

"You're all going?" Cassie asks and Brendon nods. Cassie's blue grey gaze shift's to Pete and maybe her eyes harden a bit. Pete raises his hands in an 'I'm innocent' fashion.

"I didn't talk Brendon into it. All I did was mention it." Pete says and Cassie's eyes move to Brendon and he nods.

"That's true." He confirms.

"And Jon?" Cassie questions.

"I offered to go." Jon supplies. Cassie's eyes narrow at Jon and Pete knows when he should go. He stands and leaves the room, Brendon following along behind him.

"We'll finish this later." Pete says and Jon nods. That leaves Cassie and Jon all alone and the girl looks over at him.

"You volunteered to go?" She asks softly as she moves to sit down next to him on his bunk. Jon nods but Cassie looks skeptical.

"I did."

"Why? I thought you didn't like to fight?" The girl asks, Jon doesn't know how to tell her that he needs to fight, that he feels the pressure thrumming through him and he needs to let it all out.

"I need to. They need me." Jon finally anwsers and Cassie sighs.

"It's dangerous." She tells him, now it's Jon's turn to sigh.

"I'm not helpless Cassie." He sound's weary, he doesn't want to have this fight. Cassie run's a hand through her wavy hair.

"I know that, just these fights..you never know what could happen...why willingly fight?"

"Brendon and Pete fight all the time." Jon retorts, his strong arms crossing over his broad chest.

"It's easier for Brendon! You know that!" Her voice raises and she's standing, Jon following.

"I'm not just going to stand here and be useless Cassie. I can fight! I can so I should!" He sounds so earnest and he's looking at her like he just want's her to understand but she shakes her head.

"What if something happens to you?" Her voice is quieter, she's not looking at him anymore but he's staring holes into her.

"I'll be fine." Jon knows he shouldn't say things like that, not if he doesn't know if he will be. Cassie raises her head and she has tears in her eyes.

"But what if you're not?" Her hands are wrapping around herself and she's crying, soft tears sliding down her cheek's.

"Cassie.." Jon starts but the girl cut's him off.

"You're all I have Jon! You can't die....I need you!" The words rush out of her so fast but Jon catches them all and Cassie looks shocked at herself, like she hadn't meant to say those things. Like, she didn't want to say that to him.

"Cassie." Jon tries again and he rest's his hands on her arms. Jon knows why she's like this, why she act's this way. Cassie has a abandonment complex now, a constant fear that she'll eventually lose everyone she loves. "I know you're afraid, that you're afraid to be left all alone. I know that when we fight you're always afraid that we'll lose someone, that you'll be all alone one day." Jon squeezes her arms, not tight, just firm, just enough to prove his point.

"But I swear to you. I swear when I say I'm coming back I mean it. I'm not going to leave you all alone, I promise." Jon mean's every word that spills from his mouth, it's things he always knew but never said outloud, never told her. He could never leave her, even if he wanted to.

She looks up at him, eyes tear stained. "I don't want you to go." She whispers, sounding slightly like a child and he moves his hand up, cup's her face. Jon finds himself leaning down, pressing their lips together, soft and gentle. Cassie freezes under his touch for a split second but then it's like something has been ripped open, something is pouring out of them and she leans into the kiss, crushing their lips together.

Jon's still holding on to her, his fingers now wound around her wrists and their mouths connected hot and wet. It's the first time they've ever, the first time he's ever been like this with her. Just as quickly, whatever was pulled open from Cassie is forced shut again and she jerks away from him, like his lips are burning her's.

Jon is looking down at her surprised. They've crossed a line, shit, shit, he hadn't meant to, he just...he doesn't know what happened to him. In this house, in this place it's like emotions are amplified tenfold and Jon still isn't used to it.

"I'm sorry." He says and Cassie is looking at him with wide eyes and red bruised lips. She shakes her head.

"I...I can't do this...I'm sorry." She says to him and it's heartbreakingly quiet and honest and Jon feels like he ruined it, whatever he had with her he ruined it and he might not ever get it back.

Cassie wipes her eyes and she brushes past Jon, going somewhere that Jon doesn't know. Somewhere he won't follow.

"Keeping your promise a little too well aren't you?" Jon hears Brendon ask from behind him.

"Shut up Brendon." The older boy replies as he drops down on his bunk.




Entry nine: It Will All Get Better In Time

Ever since Patrick died, Cassie has tried to detach herself from everyone else in the house...everyone beside's Krissy because after Jenny, Krissy was her oldest friend. She's tried to not get close to anyone, to not care about anyone but herself. She lives this way now because the second you start caring about someone, the moment you allow yourself to be in love is the moment that that person will be taken away from you.

So, Cassie really wishes she hadn't kissed Jon.

After Patrick's death Jon was there, he was there to comfort her and talk to her and make her feel okay. He managed to slip past all her barries, he managed to make her care. Despite Cassie's want to detach herself, to make herself emotionally dead she couldn't pull it off. She still cares about all of them, every person in the house she cares.

It's not just the fact that she's trying to keep herself closed off but the fact that ever since what happened to Patrick, relationship's were started to be looked down upon. Relationship's were seen as a weakness, something that could be distracting, something that could cause someone's death. Brendon and Krissy were the only one's in the house in an offical relationship, Brendon can hold his own, she's not his weakness. It sort of chill's Cassie down to her bone's that when they first found the hideout, when this whole thing started Cassie had Patrick, Ryan had Jenny, and Krissy had Brendon. Two down, one to go.

Cassie was upstairs again, with Gabe and Alex and Nate. They were quiet and they didn't ask a lot of question's. Maybe it wasn't weird that people just broke down in tears anymore. The girl was sitting by the window, the only window that wasn't boarded up, the only window that showed the sky. The dying sunlight fell through the window, casting ray's against Cassie's skin. A paticularly pretty shine catching on her wedding ring.

Then there was Patrick and the way she won't let herself consider being with Jon, because she was married. She was Patrick's wife, not just his girl but his wife and that stood for something, at least to her. Beside's it's only been six months since Patrick's death, since she lost the love of her life...not even a year...they can't, she can't. Jon can't expect her to be ready to move on.



Entry Ten: The Dreams In Which I'm Dying Were The Best I Ever Had

Gabe is writing down that week's number's when Ryan finds him. Ryan all sweaty and pale with dirt stained on the knees of his black jeans. Gabe set's down his pen and looks at Ryan with startled eyes. "Ross, man what happened?" Ryan just shakes his head and slams his hands down on the wooden table, not a good move considering the table is already in terrible condition.

"Gabe, I need all the information you have on the luno's. Everything I've already read and whatever I haven't and I need you to put a fax out to everyone...anyone asking for their information." Ryan rushes the words out and his eyes flicker towards the door. Gabe closes the notebook and looks at Ryan intently. It's not such an odd request, back when it all happened Ryan wanted to know everything he could about the luno's.

"Can I ask why?" Gabe says and Ryan looks down before he returns his gaze back to the older boy's face.

"Come with me." Ryan request's and he's heading back toward's the door. The taller boy watches the thin boy for a moment before he sighs and follows him out the door. He follows Ryan across the back of the hideout, dry dying grass stained yellow. The sun was close to setting, it wouldn't be much longer now and to Gabe the days have never felt quicker.

Ryan lead's him a few yard's away, Gabe already knows where they're going. The only place they actually walk to these day's. They stop infront of three rises of earth..or at least where there used to be three rises of earth. Now there's one dug open grave and two completely empty ones. Krissy's already standing by the middle grave, Brendon beside her, holding her hand.

"What the fuck?" Gabe breathes out because this is a grave yard, these are their friend's graves and they're destroyed.

"The luno's." Ryan says quiet and he's staring at the the two empty graves, he's ignoring the third, the one that still has the coffin in it. Ryan doesn't need to say anything else because Gabe's been studying the luno's every day, trying to find out everything he can about the horrible creatures that now roam the earth.

He knows how they were created, kind of. A goverment experiment gone wrong, some kind of super warrior that america was so desperate to create, to protect themselves. Gabe finds that damn ironic, the fact that something that was meant to help ended up hurting everyone.

Gabe knows that the closest thing they can classify the luno's as are a horrific cross between vampires, werewolves, and human's. That they need to attack people or animals to keep alive, that they can techincally come out in the day time but they'll slowly be burned each second they are. They never change their apperance though, they always look the same. Mostly like human's but distorted, like, someone decided to stretch the human form. Creating longer arms with sharp clawed finger's, elongnated leg's, stretched out neck's and razor sharp teeth.

The information about the luno's happens to be mostly trial and error, a mix of guess work and supersitions. At least they know for sure that the burn bullets still work. Gabe knows that the luno's steal bodies, he's read about it but never experienced it but he knows the basics of it.

Gabe knows that the person has to be dead less than seven months, any longer and the body can't be used. He knows that it only work's on human bodies. Gabe doesn't know what they do exactly, but they bring people back, except their not people anymore, their mindless, shell's of their former selves. No memories, no human instincts, nothing but their new luno lives. Gabe shudders at the thought that his former friend's might be luno's now.

"Who?" Gabe asks, his eyes sweeping the ground before moving side long to the three people standing beside him.

"Jenny...and Patrick." Brendon says quietly, he's still holding Krissy's hand but the other is balled up into a tight fist at his side.

"It was too late for Spencer." Ryan add's quietly. Gabe flinches, he count's the months mentally. It's been ten months for Spencer, he was the first one they ever lost...they had all been so stupid back then.

It had only been six months for Patrick and seven months exactly for Jenny.

"It should've been too late for her." Ryan mutter's, Gabe looks at the boy. He knows that it must be horrible, it's like losing your girlfriend all over again. "That means they came before now...none of us have been back here in so long...who the fuck knows when they came and got the bodies.." Ryan is saying, his voice is rising with hysteria but Gabe doesn't blame him.

"We've got to tell them." Brendon says and he's looking past them all to the dark walls of the hideout, the sun is sinking deeper into the darkness and twilight is close, so close, mere minutes before they all be in danger. Until a brand new night of surviving starts.

It takes them ten minutes to gather everyone to tell them. Gabe end's up being the one to tell everyone, maybe because he knows the most about the subject, maybe because it wasn't his girlfriend, his husband or his best friend. Maybe that's why it's him. Ryan's eyes are trained on Cassie when Gabe tells them. It sort of feels like they're all watching the dark haired girl.

She doesn't do what Ryan expects. She doesn't break down into tears on the spot, she doesn't scream or cry or throw things. She sit's, heavy eyes and tight grimace. She doesn't do anything he expects but she stands, swift and she's gone, striding back to the bunk rooms. Almost like he's on cue, Jon follows her and maybe she want's that, maybe she doesn't.

*

Jon finds Cassie standing by her bunk, her back to him and her head is bowed, hair slipping forward and covering her pretty face. He knows she's crying now. He moves close behind her, rest's his strong hands on her shoulders.

"Are you okay?" He knows that a very stupid question, of course she's not okay. She just found out that her dead best friend and husband's bodies have been taken by luno's, that chances are good that they too are luno's now.

Cassie shakes her head. "It scares me...the fact that he's out there somewhere...that he exists again."

"I know it must be hard..." She's turning in his arms so that they are face to face. He was right, she's crying, wet trail's running down her cheek's. Cassie's hands find his chest, fingers splayed across soft muscle.

"It's more then hard...it's maddening...it's like, I want to see him again..."

"Cassie-"

"I know...I know he wouldn't be the same. He wouldn't even know who I was..but it's Patrick." She looks up at him through her tears. Jon's so sick of seeing those gorgeous eyes filled with tears. "It's Patrick." She repeats. Jon nods leans down and kisses the top of her head.

"I know." He mumbles against her soft hair. "I know."

*

In the kitchen Pete is currently punching the wall with his good hand. They let him do it, no one could stop him if they wanted to. He's not strong enough to break the wall but he might break his other hand.

"How could those bastards get them? No! No! Fuck no!" Pete is screaming, when it comes to Patrick he's never been rational. "I'll kill them! All of those fucking luno's! They'll all be dead meat!" He punches the wall with each word that fall's from his lips and a few more times after he stop's talking. Pete punches before he sort of just slides down the wall, sitting on the wooden floor, head on his arms and his arms on his knees.

Everyone in the room knows exactly how Pete feels. They all share the same thought's, the same unbridled anger. The luno's had killed their friend's and now, now they've taken them, made them the very things that killed them, the very things that the rest of them have to fight off on a nightly basis. That was just an asshole move. The luno's do it on purpose, they take human's and change them not to have more luno's no, but to drive the former human's friend's, lover's, family, whatever, completely crazy.

"What happen's...what happen's if we run into them at the mission tomorrow?" Alex asks. No one says anything but Brendon does get out of his seat, his eyes sweeping over the whole lot of them until they rest on Ryan.

"We do what we always do to luno's." He says, before he too turns and walks away.

No one goes out that night but Gabe does fax around picture's of Jenny and Patrick, asking if anyone's encountered or killed either one of those luno's. He honestly doesn't know which news he'd rather recieve, the fact that they were spotted or the fact that they were dead. Along with the picture's Gabe faxes that their group is taking the delivery mission.

*

Friday rolls around and Pete spends all day prepairing Jon and Brendon about their mission planned for that night. Ryan decides he want's to go too as does Gabe and even more surprising Nate. Cassie spends a good amount of the day asking Jon not to go, Jon spends an equal amount of time telling her that he has to go, promising that he'll be okay.

In the back of his mind he knows that if he isn't okay...if something does happen...that she'll never believe anything again. That thought almost makes him want to stay, but the tear's she cried last night make him want to go, go and kill those fuck's who took Patrick, who continue to hurt his friend's over and over and over again. Getting revenge on those bastard's is what make's him go.

Cassie doesn't ask to go, Pete had been thinking that she would, thinking that she'd want to see if he'd be there...Pete's kind of relieved that she doesn't ask. Krissy does ask but Brendon tells her no. It pisses her off and she end's up slapping him but he shrugs it off, they both know that it's for her protection.

They load up on weapons, make sure they got the best of the best, no mistake's, no accident's, they can't afford it.

They have to take the truck because the van is still broken down, Pete complain's to Andy and Joe about it but Andy just shakes his head and asks Pete if he aware of just how hard it is to find part's for an engine nowadays? They get ready to leave just before twilight, everyone has at least two gun's on them, all loaded with the burn bullets.

Cassie finds Jon before they leave. He's expecting another plea to not go. He's not expecting her to wrap her arms around him, her face pressed against his chest. "Come back." She whispers. It's not a question, not a hope but a demand. Jon nods, tip's her chin up so their eyes meet.

"I will."

She kisses him on the cheek and lets him go.

Pete and Jon ignore the fact that Brendon smell's like sex. The three of them are squatting in the bed of the truck. Gun's at the ready. It's really not the safest thing but that's why Brendon's back there, in case of an ambush. Nate, Gabe and Ryan are in the cab of the truck, Ryan driving quick and steady down the broken road's. It only take's ten minutes to get to the outlet store but by the time they arrive, it's already dark.

Ryan park's the truck by the side of the outlet store. There's a huge delivery truck a few feet from where Ryan parked. A huge crate, probably the one full of burn bullets sit's on the ground by the loading ramp. Brendon, Pete, and Jon hop out of the back of the truck as the other three boy's in the front come out behind them.

They're watching the area carefully, gun's out and aimed, prepared for anything. A man comes out of the outlet store, older, graying and slightly scruffy, he looks nervous like, he'd rather not be out here at all. "You human?" He asks and they nod. They can all remember a time when that question wasn't necessary.

"Show em' Gabe." Ryan says, turning to look at the tallest boy. Gabe nods and fishes a paper out of his pocket. It's that week's issue of the rag, crinkled and crumpled but the guy nods, knows that only people in hideout's get the paper. "What is it you need exactly?" Ryan asks, he's not used to dealing with this guy, he's used to the other worker...Charlie or something close to it. The graying man surveys their group.

"I just need someone to guard while I load this shit in." The guy tells them and Ryan nods.

"We can do that."

There doesn't appear to be anyone or anything else around though so, maybe there was no need for bringing this many people. Nate, Brendon, and Pete hang around outside while Jon, Ryan, and Gabe help the outlet guy take the different sized boxes inside the back door of the store. It goes quicker this way and Nate's kind of glad.

He's never really fought all that much, just with Gabe and their crew but he was always back up, second string if you will. Gabe and Ryland were better fighter's, Vicky was pretty good too, Alex was with Nate on the second string list. He's not exactly sure why he wanted to come to this mission, maybe because all the other's were volunteering, he wanted to prove that he could help out beyond keeping track of fax number's and what day of the week it is.

It takes a little over fifteen minutes to get all the boxes inside the outlet store and Nate won't lie, he's kind of relieved that this mission was a bust. Brendon looks kind of disappointed and Nate can hear Jon mumbling about something but he just eager to go home. After the boxes are inside the outlet guy invites them in for a moment because he says he want's to pay them, something that none of them can refuse so, Ryan and Jon go inside while the rest of them hang around outside the back door.

It's taking the two boy's a little too long to come back out and just as Nate is going to express this to the rest of them two sudden loud bang's issue through the night air. One being the sound of a door hitting a wall, the second being gun shots.

"Fuck! Fuck! You guys' help!" They hear Ryan yell and Brendon is bursting through the door instantly. They find Ryan on the floor with a luno bearing down on top of him and Jon being held up in the air by a luno, it's strong hand is wrapped around the boy's throat.

"What the fuck?" Brendon screams but he doesn't hesistate. His gun is out and he's firing multiple shot's into the back of the luno that's holding Jon in the air. Pete fires at the large beast on top of Ryan. Brendon's aim is spectacular and the bullet goes right through the luno's wrist, blowing the clawed hand clear off the beast's arm. The luno, no longer even having a hand, drops Jon and the older boy hit's the floor with a hard thump. Jon's coughing but he seem's to be fine, pissed off but fine and he releases that anger in the form of whipping out his gun and shooting the luno right in it's crotch.

The creature squeals in pain and stumbles backwards and fall's back on the ground. Jon is aiming again and he shoot's the luno right in the head, the burn bullet doing it's job and splattering blood all over the place.

The luno on Ryan is apparently tougher to kill because it isn't dead despite getting shot by Pete but Ryan has managed to crawl away, his gun skidded away to god knows where. That's why they alway's carry two gun's. Ryan pulls his extra weapon out of the waistband of his pant's and fires at the luno.

"What the fuck happened?" Brendon is screaming.

"It was an ambush!" Ryan yell's back from his position on the cold floor.

"What?"

"They knew we were going to be here!" Jon yell's.

"How-" Gabe doesn't get to finish whatever it was that he was going to say because at that moment a small, dark flash issues through the confined space of the store and he goes flying into the back of the store, crashing into a glass case, sparkling particles raining around the tall boy. Nate looks at the spot next to him, the spot where Gabe had just been standing. What was there now was a girl, a luno girl. She turn's her gaze on Nate, lick's her full lips.

Nate raises his gun but she's fast, knocking his weapon out of his hands completely and in an instant she has him by the collar and she throws him too, across the room but he doesn't hit glass like Gabe did, no, he hit's a metal rack of potato chip's but fuck, that doesn't mean it still doesn't hurt.

"Bitch." Pete snarls, he charges at her the same time as Ryan does. Neither boy actually manages to hit her though because this other flash is streaking across and throws his arms out knocking them both away from the girl.

Pete ends up flipped over the counter and Ryan get's slammed backwards where Jon has to pull fast to the left to grab the younger boy. "You boy's need to stay away from her." A male voice says and it's the quick flash that slammed into Pete and Ryan, a slim male luno who's eyeing the girl one. "She's got her eyes set on someone else." He inform's them and he's eyeing them all, apparently looking for which might be the easiest kill.

The female luno stalks over to where Brendon is standing tense near the door. Jon want's to help him but he's pretty sure that Ryan's ankle is sprained and if he put's him down, it's that much more likely that the male luno will try to pick him off. Jon's also pretty sure that Gabe and Nate are unconcious and he doesn't know what the fuck happened to Pete.

He's keeping himself calm though, because he knows that the luno's can sense emotion's and the changes in them. Jon doesn't need them knowing that he's panicking.

Nate's back is killing him...he knows that he should've listened to Alex and just stayed behind but no, he just had to go and prove how much of a man he was by getting in a stupid fight. Nate lifts his head and he can't see anybody, not from his position on top of a metal rack on the floor. Suddenly a hand grab's his arm and Nate is jerking up and away, he looks quickly to his right, expecting a luno but no, it's that guy, the grizzled grey outlet guy.

"Kid, come on..back here, it's safe." The man is rushing out in a quiet voice. He's motioning for Nate to move with him behind a huge shelf of empty gun clips. "Come on." He says again and he reaches out and grab's Nate. The boy follows the outlet guy, moving whisper quiet...if he can just get a gun..he could take both the remaining luno's out.

They're in the back corner of the store but from here Nate can see Gabe laying flat on his back, surrounded by shard's of broken glass in the corner opposite Nate's. The tall boy is stock still, small crimson cut's covering his arms and face. Nate makes a move to crawl toward's Gabe but outlet guys' grip on his arm is strong. "That's my friend." Nate whispers, pointing toward's Gabe. The outlet guy shakes his head.

"Just wait. You're in danger."

"We're all in danger." Nate argues, whispering harshly.

"But you especially because you happen to be the smallest here and the least experienced with a weapon...you're easy pickings." The outlet man whispers and fuck, his grip is so tight.

Jon tries to think of where his gun is, where any of their gun's are because the male luno is still staring at him, dark eyes burning into jon. The luno is watching Ryan and him and no, fuck that luno if he thinks he's going down without a fight. The girl beast is standing by Brendon, watching him and Brendon makes an angry, growl like noise.

"How'd you freaks know we were here?" He grit's out, the girl makes a clicking noise with her tongue.

"Freaks hurts...do you really think you should be calling us that?" She laughs and Brendon scowls, deep line's etching his young face.

"Doesn't matter, I'm going to kill you in about five seconds." Now the guy beast is one laughing.

"But we came here just for you." The girl says, her voice far too innocent for what she is. She reaches out, her cold hand on Brendon's shoulder, giving it a squeeze. She lick's her lips in what could very well be considered a seductive manner but Brendon shrugs her off.

"Already got a girl." He inform's the monster, he's just thinking of the right time to grab his gun, of where Ryan put the key's to the truck. "But there is something you could help me with." He says and the girl quirks an eyebrow, her impossibly dark eyes trail down Brendon's body.

"What is it baby?" Again with that pseudo, innocent tone. Well, Brendon definitly won't be telling Krissy this part of the story when he get's home tonight.

"Tell, me if you've seen these two around." Brendon starts, his hand dig's around in his pocket, pulls out a picture, folded and worn but it's a picture of Brendon and Krissy, Cassie and Patrick, and Ryan and Jenny from two christmases ago. The picture is from when they were all happy, still young and innocent, standing out infront of Brendon's apartment building, snow falling behind them and the six of them wearing dorky santa hat's. Brendon point's out Jenny and Patrick and the luno girl scans the photo before she's smirking.

"Is that blonde your girlfriend? I bet she would taste good." The girl whispers and it takes everything Brendon has to not grab his gun and shoot her dead right fucking there.

"Anwser me." He demand's.

"Why should I?" She actually has the gull to smirk at him, her sharp teeth gleaming in the florencent lights.

"Because I'll kill you if you don't." He states, the girl laughs.

"Maybe you just need to sweeten the deal. Give me one of these human's." She command's, her hand waving at Brendon's comrades.

"Your fucking crazy if you think that's going to happen." Brendon growls out.

"Come on," She starts and she has her hand on Brendon's shoulder again. "Just give me the one with the hurt ankle...he's weak anyway." She coo's in Brendon's ear, the boy growls and he pushes her away.

"Fuck you freak. You'd better anwser me because I'm losing my patience."

"No, I've never seen your little friend's before...never." She states and she pushes her mouth to Brendon's, suddenly kissing him in a distorted manner.

While Brendon's distracted the male that's with her turn's to Jon and Ryan. "Give him to me." The male request's gesturing at the unconcious Ryan.

"Go fuck yourself." Jon tells the male and the luno laughs.

"Guess I'll just kill you and take him too." He says, simple as if Jon is an insect in his way, easily disposed of. He starts toward's Jon. The boy drag's Ryan's body back but damn, he's kind of dizzy from nearly getting strangled to death earlier and he stumbles a bit. He wonder's if he's going to die and more importantly if Cassie will ever forgive him if he does, if she'll ever trust anyone ever again.

The male hunches down and Jon knows it's getting ready to pounce like a cat does on it's prey. Jon fully expect's to feel the pain of death but instead he hears a shout, a gun shot and feels the warm hit of blood splattering over his body. He had closed his eyes because he didn't want to see himself getting killed but they're open now and he see's Pete standing up behind the counter, gun aimed at where the male luno had previously been standing.

The male luno in question was now a headless corpse on the outlet floor and Jon's stomach lurches because he and Ryan are covered in the luno's blood and brain matter.

"Couldn't do that a little earlier Wentz?" Jon asks because seriously, Pete's timing sucked ass. Pete gives a slight grin.

"Needed him to be distracted."

Jon drag's Ryan forward and he hears another gun shot. See's the girl luno dead on the floor. The shout must've been Brendon knocking her away. Brendon's looking at Jon and Ryan, looking at Pete but he doesn't look at ease.

"What's wrong?" Jon asks and Brendon burrows his brows, his face caught in a scowl.

"There's still one more."

"What? But only four came out of the back.." Jon says, remembering when the luno's has ambushed them. His words are cut off by a scream of pain from the right corner of the store and it's only then that they remember Nate isn't accounted for.

Brendon is back there first, Pete second and Jon with Ryan thrown over his shoulder third. The outlet man is already dead by the time Jon get's back there. Nate's on his hands and knees panting in pain and his right shoulder bleeding profuesly.

The outlet man was the last luno.



Entry eleven: Turn Away Because I'm Awful Just To See

Nate can't believe his shitty luck, he can't fucking believe it. The second fight he's in, the first fight he willingly signed up for and he get's bit by a luno.

It turn's out that the real outlet man, Charlie, was killed three days ago. Brendon had found his decomposed body in the backroom, tucked into a freezer. The last luno, the grizzled graying man, was just acting human, the whole thing was a setup and they fell for it. Brendon is so unbelievably pissed off at himself, he can't believe he couldn't tell that the guy was a fake human. He always pride's himself on spotting the fakers but something fooled him, somehow they pulled one over on him but more importantly, they bit Nate.

Nate ride's in the front with Pete and Brendon, whose taking over Ryan's job of driving. The thin boy is laid out in the bed of the truck along with Gabe and Jon whose watching over them. Ryan's ankle is sprained so he'll probably have trouble walking for the next week or so, Gabe has cut's on his face and arms but he too should be fine. Jon came away with new blood stained clothes and dark hand marks wrapped around the pale skin of his neck. Pete a few bump's and bruises and Brendon a pissed off mood.

He drives fast, swearing and cursing about someone at the hideout needing to figure out how to make the devices that they wear work again, because what point is there to wearing them when they don't even work? Brendon ignores the fact that Patrick was the inventer of the devices, Patrick was their 'gadget guy, a title he hated.' Brendon also wishes for some kind of walkie talkies because what kind of team doesn't have walkie talkies? Apparently them.

Nate makes a gurgling noise, blood spilling thick and deep crimson out of his mouth. He's clutching at his arm, concious but in horrific pain. Nate cries out, tipping his head back against the seat, his short black hair brushing the worn material of the seat and his small, silver nose ring shining in the dim lights. He's bleeding all over his clothes, all over the seat, all over Pete, whose sandwhiched next to him but they don't care because they've just got to get back, they don't have long. The group make's it back in fifteen minutes time, it took longer because three of them are injured.

As soon as Brendon shut's off the truck he's out of the cab and over on Nate's side, pulling the older boy out, Nate clutches at Brendon weakly, his blood oozing over Brendon's arms but that doesn't matter because they're running out of time.

Brendon kicks the door open but it doesn't break, honestly he's surprised. "Andy!" He screams throughout the house, his voice echoing around all the massive empty space. Nate coughs up some blood, Brendon's eye's him for a moment before he screams louder. Andy doesn't come but Cassie does, streaking around the corner.

"Brendon...what..what is it?" She anwsers him before she really has time to drink in the scene, if she took a look she would know what was wrong.

"Nate! He got bit!" Cassie's blue eyes go wide and she rushes to the infirmary door, pulls it open and Brendon rushes in there, Nate still in his arms. "Where the hell is Andy?" Brendon growls out.

"He-He's upstairs...I'll get him." She breathes out quietly and she's gone just like that, he can hear her thumping up the stairs. Brendon turn's his attention back to Nate.

"It's going to be okay." He tells the smaller boy and Nate nods. His entire neck, the left side of his face and his shoulder and arm are stained a deep crimson. Brendon rip's Nate's shirt open, pulls it off of him as gently as he can. He doesn't have time for buttons or pulling t-shirts over heads, fuck that. Nate's bite wound is bad, deep and jagged and Brendon's betting that some skin is missing.

More thumping echoing above them and Andy is in the infirmary, Cassie, Krissy, Alex and Ryland right behind him.

"Brendon! Cassie said...Fuck." Andy trail's off and he's at Nate's side in an instant. "He got bit?"

"Yeah, and he need's some antidote now!" Brendon shout's, it's already been probably twenty minutes, already been so long. "We still have some right?" Andy looks at Brendon warily and Nate groans, cries in pain and grit's his teeth. Andy looks back at Ryland, the taller boy moves to a cupboard in the corner, pulls it open and is pratically throwing things out of it as he searches for something he need's so, desperately...something that Nate need's.

He finds one, a thin vial of icy blue liquid. Andy already has a needle ready and as soon as he has the vial in his tattoo covered hands he has it hooked up. Brendon forgot how good they were at this, how quick they were. Maybe, maybe it will be okay after all. Andy doesn't wait, doesn't hesistate as he shoves the sharp tipped needle into Nate's injured shoulder, the boy cries out in pain as Andy pushes the plunger down, empties the icy blue vial into the boy's body.

The bearded makeshift doctor removes the needle and take's a moment, allows himself to breath. "How long?" He asks, his hazel eyes burning into Brendon's.

"Fifteen..maybe twenty minutes." Brendon replies, his voice tight and grim. He's running a hand through his hair short dark hair, forgetting that he was covered in Nate's blood. Brendon eyes the bitten boy and the liquid seem's to be taking effect, putting Nate to sleep so they can clean him up.

"Where are the others?" Cassie's voice issues through the small group that's crowded into the infirmary. Brendon only just remembers that other people are in here, people beside Andy and Nate. Cassie is still waiting for an anwser, she looks beyond worried.

"They're fine..sorta...they're out in the truck." Cassie is rushing out of the infirmary along with Ryland and Alex. Krissy is being oddly silent, her eyes fixated on the injured Nate.

"What the fuck happened Brendon?" Andy is asking, he looks shaken and he probably is, it's been awhile since they've had a really serious injury, all they had been having as of late were hurt wrist's and sprained ankle's, not this...never this. Brendon sit's on one of the empty cots and just lets himself breath a moment, the rush of everything that happened is still thrumming through his body.

"It was a trap..." Krissy gasps but Brendon continues. "The usual outlet guy..the luno's killed him..put someone there in his place..and I didn't catch it! I didn't know and somehow that guy got Nate, bit him because I wasn't paying enough attention." It's the first time that Brendon's really letting the guilt about what happened at the store sink in.

"Were the other's hurt?" That's always what Andy cares about first and foremost, he doesn't really have time for Brendon's guilty concious when he has to patch everyone up. Brendon shakes his head.

"Not too bad. Ryan has a sprained ankle I think..Gabe got cut up a little bit, whacked his head kinda hard and Jon got choked but Nate's definitly the worst." Brendon replies as his eyes sink back to the bloodied boy. Andy sighs, run's a shaking hand through his shoulder length curly brown hair. His finger's twitch and Brendon knows that he's wishing for a cigarette. He moves over to the little sink in the corner, a bright pink bucket in his hand and a cloth over his shoulder, whatever he can do to keep his mind and hands busy.

"Krissy, want to grab me some bandages?" Andy asks, he glances back at Krissy who nods and move's jerky, like she was pulled from some deep thoughts. Brendon thinks he knows what she's thinking about but he's not allowing himself to say it, not allowing himself to even think about it. Andy heads back over to where Nate is passed out, in his medicated sleep.

Brendon watches as the doctor cleans the boy, wiping away the deep crimson color, staining the white cloth.

"It's going to work right Andy?" Brendon asks, his voice is lower than he'd like to admit as his fear's sink into his mind. Andy spares Brendon a glance, his hazel eyes made larger by the pair of square glasses he's wearing, he shrugs.

"Honestly, I don't know Bren." Brendon's heart crashes to his feet.

"But last time-"

"Last time was different Brendon...these circumstances are different."

"So, you're saying that it might not work?"

"I'm saying that I don't know." Brendon makes a noise in his throat and tries to lower his anger, keep calm because it's so, so easy for him to get upset.

"Why wouldn't it?" He doesn't want to even consider the fact that the antidote might not work.

"Brendon, this shit..this antidote is experimental! Last time we got lucky, last time things worked and they might this time but I'm telling you that Nate isn't you! It might not work for him!" Andy hadn't meant to yell at Brendon but he did, he also didn't mean to bring up Brendon's accident but he did that too, but fuck, he's trying to save a life here The doctor doesn't need someone breathing down his neck.

Brendon scowls and he's glaring and then Krissy is next to him, taking his blood stained hand and pulling him up, leading him upstairs to shower, to forget all about the jagged mark on his shoulder and how Nate now has a matching one.

Ryland ran out into the night as soon as Brendon told them that the other's were outside. Cassie and Alex on his heel's. He saw the beat up truck parked crooked by the house and Jon standing in the bed of the truck. Ryland rushes over because Gabe...Gabe and Nate were both hurt. Ryland came out here to get Gabe because he doesn't want to think about what happened to Nate. He want's to pretend as long as he can.

Jon jump's out of the bed of the truck and motions for Ryland to come over and help him. The younger doctor races over, see's Ryan and Gabe sprawled out in the cold metal of the truck. He knows their injuries aren't too serious, that they don't really need him to be out here, Alex either but again, neither of them are ready to face Nate just yet.

Jon hand's Gabe over to Ryland and Alex, their tall friend is awake now but he's stumbling on long leg's, his equally long arms hooked around Ryland and Alex's shoulder's for support. Pete is carrying Ryan, bride over the threshold style, Ryan's spindely limb's dangling over Pete's strong arms. Jon is closing up the back of the truck, Cassie hovering uncertainly behind him, a look of what could only be considered relieved on her face. Ryland knows what the girl must be feeling, pulled in a million different directions. They all tend to end up feeling this way.

Five minutes later and they've gotten Gabe and Ryan settled beside Nate in the infirmary cot's. Their fine, Ryan is awake and complaining that he shouldn't even be in the infirmary and Gabe telling them that his head feels like it was repeatedly pounded against a brick wall. Nate is still knocked out, his bite mark was cleaned and Ryland flinches because Nate's missing a huge section of his shoulder, you can clearly make out the shape of sharp teeth marks dug into the pale flesh.

Andy's tracking Nate's progress, seeing how the med's are holding. He's scared shitless because this is only the second time this has happened and the memories from the first time still haven't faded from his mind.

The problem is that a luno bites for two different reasons, one to kill and the other to turn. Apparently the luno at the store intended to turn Nate, to make him a luno as well. When a luno bites to turn, a sort of venom sinks into the skin, infiltrating the blood and it turn's them rapidly into a luno. The only way to stop the transformation is to inject them with the antidote, the one that's still experimental highly experimental.

Andy found out about the antidote shortly before they found the hideout. Something the goverment managed to invent to try and make up for the horrible mistake of creating the luno's. He always knew that the goverment would end up being the downfall of human kind but he didn't really expect it in his own lifetime. The antidote, whose offical name is 'Luno Anti-Virus A' or LAVA, but no one really uses the offical name, acts as a defense mechanism but sometimes even that fails.

"What happens if the antidote doesn't take?" Ryland asks, he's leaning against the white counter, his long face solemn, staring at Andy with worried dark eyes. Ryland doesn't even want to ask the question but they both know that they need to talk about it.

"He'll turn." Andy says it quietly, that's kind of why Ryland didn't want to be a doctor here, because when you're a doctor you have to look at things in a medical sense, even if that mean's admitting to things you never would before.

"And then what?" Ryland doesn't even have to ask, he remembers when they all went over the protical for what to do when someone get's turned.

"Two options...we let him go and he lives as a luno...possibly coming back to kill us later...or...we.." Andy trails off and Ryland doesn't make him say it, doesn't want him to say it. Andy end's up getting out the leather straps, strap's Nate down to the bed. The boy is asleep now but he'll wake up soon and when he does it will be easier to know whether or not he's turning, whether or not they have a reason to be afraid.

"We do what we have to." Ryland supplies, pushes his thick, medium length, dark brown hair out of his face, Andy nods.

That's all they've been doing all along.

Cassie finds Jon in the bunk room. She comes and sit's down across from him, soft careful movement's. Her soft eyes widening as they sweep over him. Jon knows he must look terrible. Crimson droplets of blood speckled all over his grey t-shirt and jean's, brushed across his cheek's, dark bruises in the shape of a inhumanly strong luno hand, decorating his neck. it's disgusting but he has to wait for Brendon to get out of the shower before he can clean off.

"You're covered in blood." She note's, her voice as soft as her movement's.

"At least it's not my own." He jokes and she smiles soft.

"At least you came back." Cassie replies.

"I told you I would." Jon feels like maybe a bit of her faith is restored, the fact that he promised her he'd come back and he did.

"But not completely uninjured." The girl point's out, she leans forward and her fingers press feather light against the dark hand prints on the side of his neck.

"Better to be bruised than to be dead." Jon tells her and the girl nods, sit's back and she looks like she want's to say something else. "What's wrong?" He add's because she definitly looks like there's something that is.

"Did you...did you see..I mean...was he there?" Cassie doesn't have to say who, Jon already knows and he shakes his head.

"He wasn't."

Cassie looks relieved about the news but Jon can see it, just the tiniest hint of disappointment in her eyes, on her pretty face.

"I'm glad you're not dead." She says quietly and she's up and heading out of the room.

"I won't go anymore..." Jon says when Cassie's halfway out of the room.

"What?" She stop', glances back at him.

"I won't go anymore unless they need me...I promise." Jon feels that energy he had felt, that urge to fight and kill has faded, it's not worth scaring her, it's not worth breaking his promise to Patrick, it just isn't worth it.



Entry twelve: My Kind's, Your Kind

Brendon's been out of the shower for five minutes now. Krissy's downstairs waiting for him, Jon's waiting to use the bathroom but Brendon can't seem to leave the bathroom just yet, he can't. He's been staring at himself in the mirror for the last three minutes, long stretches of pale wet skin that end's at his upper arm, at his shoulder. The skin there is faded and jagged, ugly in the dim bathroom's light.

He can ignore it most time's. Sometime's he can imagine that the scar doesn't exist but now it's the only thing he can think about. What happened tonight, what happened to Nate, it's bringing it all back, every memory of the night it happened to Brendon. Every memory Brendon has tried so hard to push away.

Four months into the luno outbreak. Two months after Spencer died. They were still naiive, still just kid's in a sense. None of them were all that great at fighting and it still surprises Brendon that they managed to stay alive as long as they did. They didn't have a hideout back then, no safe place to stay at night so, they just constantly moved. Sleep during the day, walk all night, hide at night, survive at night.

There was a fight one night, they fucked up and this luno cornered Jon and Ryan. Brendon went over there to help, to save them because Ryan always loses his gun during fights, they'd be better off giving him an axe or something. Brendon got over there and tackled the luno, knocking the relatively small creature to the ground. Unfortunatly the luno managed to grab Brendon's ankle, pulling the boy down with him. Brendon hadn't been anywhere near as strong then as he was now.

He remembers being overpowered, trying to push the beast off of him but it was too strong, wouldn't budge, not even when Jon and Pete emptied a round into it. He remembers strong clawed hands pinning his wrist's to the ground, the hot stink of the luno's breath. Brendon remembers hearing Krissy screaming when the creature sunk it's razor sharp teeth into his shoulder. Hot blood pouring out of his wound, flesh ripping and pain, intense buring pain.

That night he was sure he was going to die. It hurt so much that he thinks by the end of it he was wishing for death. Pete and Joe ended up killing the grotesque thing and Brendon was stretched out on the dusty earth, staring up at the night sky, vision unfocused and his body quickly going numb.

Pete and Ryan dropped down on their knees beside Brendon. Krissy falling down beside him and he can so clearly remember her crying, icy blue eyes filled with fear. Ryan too looked afraid, afraid to lose another friend so quickly.

"I think I'm dying." Brendon admitted and it wasn't the smartest thing to say considering his girlfriend was right there.

"It bit him." He remembers Pete saying softly and he remembers Ryan biting his lip and staring with worry. Krissy is crying and the last thing Brendon remembers hearing is her saying 'I love you.' over and over and over again.

Krissy filled Brendon in on what had happened after that. That Andy had vile's of the antidote in his bag, that they weren't sure what would happen but injected Brendon anyway because it was the best chance they had. She told him that the group had to keep walking, she told him about and how Jon and Joe and Patrick kept taking turn's carrying his bloodied and beaten body.

Krissy tells him that she was afraid that he was going to die, afraid of the conversation that the other's were having, about how if Brendon turned...they'd have to kill him. She said that she didn't sleep at all that night, that she laid Brendon out on her lap, brushed the hair out of his face as he sweated and shook.

Brendon remembers waking up and it was daylight, bright light shining around them, the other's still sleeping. His clothes were stained dark red and his entire body ached. He remembers when Krissy woke up and looked scared of him and how Pete grabbed her and pulled her away from him. Brendon looked confused and felt the heavy burn of pain in his shoulder.

Andy move's carefully to examin Brendon, he doesn't miss how Pete, Jon, and Ryan have their gun's drawn.

"You guys...what are you doing?" Brendon asks, confused as to why his girlfriend suddenly isn't allowed to touch him and why his friend's are suddenly pointing gun's at him.

"You were bit by a luno last night Brendon." Pete says from behind his gun, his golden eyes narrowed. Brendon's mouth fall's open.

"But I'm fine! I'm me! You don't have to point gun's at me...I don't want to hurt you guys."

It's around this time that Brendon had realized that he could smell a hell of a lot better than he used to be able to, that everything felt intensified. He could smell nerves on Andy as the older boy slid his hand to the younger boy's shoulder, his shoulder that was completely healed but now badly scarred, to check the wound. He could hear better too, could hear how fast everyone's heart's were beating, hear Krissy's shallow breathing. It's this time that Brendon knew he was not how he used to be.

In the end they come to the conclusion that Brendon is still human..sort of. He's human but he's retained some luno qualities. He's faster now, stronger now, slightly better than his human friend's now. Brendon's relieved that he doesn't crave blood or flesh like the luno's do.

All things considered, things don't change all that much. Krissy's a little wary of him at first, she says that his eyes look different now, shine a little more bright. When Brendon fight's for the first time after his accident is when they notice the differences, how Brendon can keep up with the luno's better, aim better, hit harder. That's how he quickly becomes the best fighter in the house.

By now all his friend's are used to the situation, Krissy's used to the situation.

Brendon's pulled from his memories by a soft knock on the door. He doesn't have to ask who it is, he can smell Krissy anywhere.

"Come in." He says softly and the door open's revealing his tall, blonde girlfriend to him.

"Are you alright?" Krissy asks, Brendon gives himself one more long stare in the mirror before he turn's to face her.

"I'm fine." It comes out sounding all wrong and he knows that she doesn't believe him.

"You're thinking about the night you got bit aren't you?" She asks, Brendon doesn't say anything, looks down. She's far too adept at reading his thought's. Krissy slides up in front of him, her warm, soft hands sliding around his thin waist.

"Yeah, I just...I'm wondering what would've happened if the antidote hadn't worked for me." He looks up and meet's her bright, bright eyes, she's just staring at him, searching his face.

"But it did...so, that doesn't matter." Krissy doesn't want to talk about what would've happened either. The two of them never bring it up, no one does. It's a fact that everyone knows but no one talk's about knowing.

"I just want it to work for him too." Brendon want's to say that his reasons are totally selfless, that he want's it to work just so Nate will live but there's another reason too. Brendon want's it to work so he's not the only one...so he won't be all alone.

Krissy take's Brendon's hand and lead's him downstairs to the bunk's. He kind of want's to go and see how Nate's doing but he knows that Krissy's not going to let him do that just yet. The black haired boy lay's down and the beautiful blonde girl curl's in next to him. No one else is in the bunk rooms except for a shirtless Jon who had been sitting on his bunk but is standing now that he see's Brendon's finished upstairs.

"Showers all your's Walker." Brendon attempt's to make a joke, Jon gives him a half smile as he nods, Brendon can smell the luno blood covering him as he walks by.

Jon's gone and now he and Krissy are all alone. The girl leans up and presses a soft kiss to Brendon's strong, square jaw. That's what she does when they're alone, she show's him affection. She doesn't do it when Cassie is around, or when Ryan's around, or anyone who lost someone they loved because she doesn't want to rub the fact that she still has him, that they managed to stay together in anyone's face.

Brendon hold's his girlfriend close and allows himself to close his eyes, he's not tired but he need's to relax, desperately need's his mind to shut off. Krissy's hands wind around him and Brendon loves this, loves her so much. Sometimes when Krissy's sleeping Brendon lies awake and his mind get's the better of him, he finds himself getting scared. He get's scared because he knows that human's don't live as long as luno's. The creatures are capable of living much longer and if that's the truth...what if he can live that long too?

It's an idiotic thing to worry about when you could die every single day, when they are a million more things that are better to be afraid of but he does worry. What happen's when Krissy get's old and he doesn't? What happen's when everyone around him dies and he can't do anything but go on living because he isn't quite human? These thought's plauge Brendon constantly but he manages to shrug them off, pushes them away, he'll deal with it when the time comes.

Alex is in the infirmary. He's there because his best friend, his entire world is in there. Nate is in there.

The younger of the two boy's is strapped down to the hospital bed. Andy says that it's for their own safety, in case Nate changes while they're sleeping. Alex refuses to believe that Nate will turn at all. The anit-virus worked for Brendon, it will work for Nate, there is no other option in Alex's mind.

Ryland is in the room too but he's not talking, he's reading papers with Andy and looking at the little machines that Nate is hooked up to instead. Alex is standing next to Nate's bed, the injured boy is sweating and twitching and his bandages are near constantly stained red and in need of changing. Alex brushes the boy's short black bang's out of his closed eyes, black lashes spilling across impossibly pale skin. He leans down and presses the lightest of kisses to Nate's forehead. If the younger boy were awake he would've hated that, Alex's lip raises at the thought.

Alex's smile fall's away, he's frowning because he told Nate not to go. They weren't fighters, they weren't as good as all the others but Nate just shook his head and said he wanted to help, that he wanted to help Gabe. He wanted to prove to everyone and maybe to himself, that he could be helpful in a fight.

"Look where helping got you Nate." Alex says, his light brown eyes downcast and he knows that the other two men in the room can hear him but he doesn't care.

He looks up and see's Ryland and Andy staring at him. He move's his hand down to Nate's and he hold's it tight, even though it's limp and cold in his own.

"When are we going to know if the antidote worked?" Alex asks, he moves his gaze between Nate's face and the two wannabe doctors.

"Tomorrow..." Ryland replies, he's not giving an exact time but Alex thinks it's because he doesn't really know. Alex knows the story of Brendon getting bit by now. He knows that things are different this time. That Brendon got the shot right away, not twenty minutes later, that Brendon's bite wasn't as deep, the deeper the bite the faster the infection get's into the bloodstream.

"Have you decided what you'll do if he's..one of them?" Alex's stomach turn's at that thought, he doesn't want to think of Nate as anything but human, as anything but the boy he knows so well. Ryland and Andy exchange a look and shake their heads, Alex thinks that maybe this is just a formality for him, that they know exactly what they'll do if Nate changes.

Alex sit's in the chair next to Nate's bed and he's never wanted and feared the morning more.



Entry thirteen: Wink, Just Don't Put Your Teeth On Me

Alex wakes up to a thumping noise filling the infirmary. He's confused for a moment, his body is aching from sleeping in a folding chair next to Nate's bed. Alex's previously foggy mind suddenly fall's into place, thought's of Nate triggering last night's events. He's up in a flash and he's peering down at Nate's bed, praying that he see's soft brown eyes and a warm smile.

Instead of that Alex see's Nate thrashing against the restraints, trying desperately to break free. His eyes are open and wide and a very unnatural golden color. Alex's heart fall's, crashing to his feet, because no, no, Nate can't change...he can't.

"Nate?" Alex tries, his voice is trembling and Nate whips his head to the side, glaring at Alex with hard eyes, there's no sign of recongition in Nate's eyes.

The boy's skin is impossibly pale and sullen, his mouth is hanging open and Alex can just make out the sharp set of gleaming white teeth errupting through his mouth. "Nate! God..no, Nate, no!" Alex feels tear's prick his eyes and he's panicking. Nate makes a horribly strangled noise. He trashes harder, is desperate to break free from the restraints, the cot banging harshly against the tiled floor. Nate is desperate to break free, probably to kill Alex.

Alex glances sidelong at the other two cot's in the room, Gabe and Ryan are still asleep but for how much longer he isn't sure. Soon now Andy and Ryland will come down here, they'll see that Nate is changing, turning into a luno and they'll take him away. No, no, Alex isn't going to let that happen.

The boy moves, grab's the metal folding chair he had been sitting in and shoves it up under the handle of the infirmary door, locking the two doctor's and anyone else out. Alex move's back to the bed and stares down at Nate. All he want's to see is that familar face staring back at him, normal and human but his fragile hope's are dashed once again as he see's the quickly transforming Nate still thrashing in the bed. He want's to run his hand along the younger boy's cheek but he's sure that Nate will bite him. Alex isn't willing to give up hope, not yet.

"Nate? Nate...it's me, Alex." He's desperate to make Nate come back, to make him really see Alex. He come closer to Nate, is looking into Nate's now golden eyes. The strapped down boy is still breathing hard and heavy, sweating but he seem's focused now, his golden eyes focusing on Alex's face. He still's and Alex swears he can see a flicker in Nate's eyes.

"Alex..." Nate's voice is rough but he knows he hears his name. Alex grips the metal railing of the bed and nods.

"Nate, it's me.." He's smiling because it's Nate, it's his Nate, he's not changing after all and Alex is letting his hope's build back up, letting himself calm down because Nate is alright.

"Alex.." Nate pant's out. "Alex..why am I strapped to a bed?...why does everything hurt?" The boy turn's his head helplessly from side to side, trying to figure out just what's going on here. Nate pant's out and he struggles feebly against the bed restraint's.

"You got bit last night..a luno bit you." Alex explain's, Nate's now brown eyes widen and he seem's a little panicky.

"Fuck..fuck I did?" Alex nods and Nate swears. "Antidote?" He questions and again Alex nods.

"Andy gave it to you last night."

"Did it work?"

"You're talking to me aren't you?" Alex laughs because Nate's going to be fine. He's talking like Brendon was, he'll be fine just like Brendon is.

"Why's it hurt so bad?" Nate starts, his voice is trembling as he stares up at the ceiling, staring with a far away look. "Alex..Alex..it hurt's." Nate's eyes slide shut and he writhes on the bed. Before Alex can say or do anything Nate's body arches, his head pushing back against the pillow, the line of his neck is taut and he's screaming, a loud earsplitting scream that's sure to wake the whole house up.

"Nate!" Again Nate is thrashing and that recongition that had been in his eyes is gone now, faded back to a blank golden stare. He bare's his fang's and he's panting, growling at Alex.

"Alex...What the fuck is going on?" It's Gabe's voice and he's sitting up and looks scared, his dark eyes already locked on the thrashing form of Nate. "He-He's changing isn't he?" Gabe's voice is breathless and he's out of the bed, padding over, hesitant but worried about their friend.

"No! No! He was just talking to me Gabe! He just asked me why he was strapped to the bed!" Alex argues and the threat of tears are back, Gabe will tell, Gabe will get Andy and they'll take Nate away.

"He's stuck." Alex hears a voice he recongizes as Ryan say from the other bed. He see's the rail thin, brown haired boy scoot to the edge of the cot, he can't walk so, he's not getting up.

"What?" Alex breathes out. In all truth he knows very little about the world of luno's and the rule's involved with them.

"He's stuck between human and luno. He keep's flipping between them. It happens sometimes, or so I've read." Alex is getting pissed because Ryan is being way too casual about this. This is Alex's boyfriend, not someone from a medical book that Ryan happened to read about.

Nate lets out another ear piercing scream and Alex can hear thumping from upstairs, he knows it's Andy and Ryland...probably Brendon too. His heart is crashing to his feet, god, please, they can't take Nate away. Moments later the door handle rattles and Alex hears yelling from the other side of the door.

"Are you guys' okay? Gabe! Alex! Ryan! What's going on in there?" It's Andy's voice and Alex looks at the other two men in the room, obvious fear in his eyes.

"I think Nate is changing!" Ryan call's back and Alex shoot's him a dirty look. There's more rattling of the door, they're still trying to get in the room.

"The door...we can't get in! Let us in you guys!" Ryland's voice issuing from the other side of the door this time.

"No! I locked the door on purpose...you can't come in!" Alex yell's and Gabe looks terrified.

"Alex, no! What the hell? Let us in so we can check on him!" Now it's Ryland's voice and Alex almost want's to do it but he knows if it comes down to it, Ryland will side with Andy.

"No! You guys just want to kill him!" Alex knows he sound's irrational but no, he's not letting his boyfriend be killed by their friend's.

"Alex...just calm down..listen, those are our friend's out there..they just want to make sure Nate is okay, that's all." Gabe is trying to calm Alex down as he inches toward's the door.

"Gabe no!" Alex yell's so loud that the older boy flinches. "Please," The brown haired boy starts, his voice lowering significantly. "Don't Gabe...I-I love him...and they just want to kill him..."

"Alex.." Gabe sound's worried, sound's like he thinks Alex is losing his shit and maybe he is.

"Fucking Saurez! lets us in now!" Now it's Pete's voice, strong and demanding on the other side of the door.

"Al-Alex..." Nate's shaky voice issues from the bed and Alex is instantly next to him once again, ignoring everything and everyone else. Alex is relieved to see that Nate's eyes are brown again, like Alex is used to.

"I'm right here."

"Alex...it hurts so bad.." Nate whimpers, struggling to find Alex admist all the chaos.

"I know..but it will be okay." Alex shouldn't say that, he knows very well that it probably won't be okay but he can't bring himself to admit that.

"I'm having these thoughts..." Nate starts. "These terrible thought's...I-I think I'm changing..." He whispers, fear edging in his voice, cutting into Alex's chest.

"No, no, Nate..see Ryan says that you're just stuck..." The older boy is trying, trying so hard to convince everyone that Nate will be alright.

"But even people who get stuck can slip into turning." Ryan inform's them, Alex ignores him.

"Alex...I don't feel like myself...I feel different." His eyes are growing steadily gold as he speak's and Alex is crying, can no longer hold back the intense pain. He's crying at his boyfriend's words because it feels like no one is believing, no one but him.

"You'll be okay. You'll be human again." Alex tells him and he reaches out a tentative hand and card's his finger's through Nate's damp hair.

Nate shakes his head as much as he can manage."Look at me Alex..I'm strapped to a bed so I won't hurt anyone...and believe me...I would hurt someone..." He laughs a little breathless, bitter. "Right now I can't stop thinking about how good you all smell, how I just want to bite any of you..."

Gabe gasps and there are more pound's on the door. Alex feels like there's an hour glass that's been flipped inside him and that the sand is spilling out faster than he can save it, as fast as he's losing Nate.

"I love you..." Alex whispers, tear's pricking at his eyes once again.

"I love you too...that's why I need you to do something..." Nate starts and Alex's tears roll down his cheek's, hit his shirt, hit the bed, hit the restraint's that are keeping Nate tied down.

"Anything..."

"If I change...if I become a luno...please...promise me that you'll let them kill me."

Nate's words hit Alex like a ton of brick's, his heart feels like it's shattered into a million pieces and now, now even Nate is giving up hope.

"You won't change...you can't, the antidote!" Alex tries weakly. It feels like he's fighting against the inevitable, he's struggling against something that he can't win at and it's destroying him. His hand moves and finds Nate's, gripping it tight like, if he were to let go he just might sink through the floor.

"Alex..I should've listened to you..I'm no fighter..but I can feel my human self fading away. I can feel it and I know I'll turn...so, promise me...promise me that you won't let them keep me alive as a luno...I don't want to be one of them."

"Nate.." Alex want's to fight, want's to scream until someone will listen but he can't because Nate cut's him off.

"Alex! Promise!" Nate's voice raises, stern, he's shaking and it looks like he's having trouble holding on to those last shred's of humanity.

"Alex..." Gabe says from the other side of the bed, again the boy ignores him.

"I promise Nate..but I want you to do something for me." Alex starts, hands gripping the metal railing as he leans down toward's Nate. "I want you to bite me too." He whispers.

"Alex no!" Gabe says but Alex isn't looking at Gabe, just down at Nate, their hands clasped together and Nate's nail's are digging into Alex's skin, making deep marks in the pale flesh but he doesn't care, can't feel that pain when the pain of potentially losing Nate is so much more.

Nate's eyes widen and he's panting. "No! no, fuck no, Alex.."

"Yes...please, I don't want to live if it's not with you...I can't! I can't be as strong as the rest of them...I need you Nate...where you go, I go...please." Alex moves closer, lower's himself for Nate and the boy says no but he's arching up to reach the boy, the luno part of him desperately wanting to bite Alex.

Alex moves and kisses Nate, quick and hard and wet. The boy fully expects to be bit but it seem's that Nate has a little self control left. They break apart and Alex is so, so close to Nate's mouth, all the other boy has to do is lean up and bite and then they can be together forever, like Alex has always wanted.

"Please..just bite me Nate...please, I want to be with you." It's all Alex want's, all he want's in this entire world. Nothing matter's if Nate isn't here, tomorrow doesn't matter, luno's don't matter, nothing but Nate.

"Alex! No!" Nate's begging trying to fight that urge to sink his brand new razor sharp teeth into his boyfriend's supple neck. Alex presses closer and Nate can smell the soft skin, all he has to do is bite and fuck...fuck it's so tempting, his neck is right there, Nate bares his fang's, grazes them against Alex's pale neck...he can't hold back anymore...he has to bite...

Just then the door flies open, metal folding chair, flying across the room. Brendon is in the room in a flash, grabbing Alex and pulling him back, away from his boyfriend.

"No! Let me go! I want to be with him! No, no please!" Alex is struggling and begging but no one will listen, no one will release him from Brendon's grip. He almost had it, he was so close to getting exactly what he wanted and they pulled it all away from him.

"I love you Alex." Nate is shouting, desperately needing Alex to hear him. Brendon is holding Alex back but he can still see his boyfriend. "I don't want to live as a luno..." He says, his eyes are changing color's, stuck between gold and warm brown, his voice growing weaker, dying away.

"I love you Nate!" Alex screams back and he want's to kill Brendon right now.

"I love you...so..so..much.." That's the last thing Nate ever says as a human. He arches and screams and his body is cracking and changing, bone's growing longer, claw's errupting out of the tip's of his finger's. He's turning and Alex closes his eyes because he can't quite bear to watch it happen.

The screaming last's for a minute straight before it stops and Nate is gone, gone even though he's sitting right there, still strapped down to the bed. It isn't Alex's, Nate, this Nate is a monster. The boy is thrasing again, struggling against his restraint's and causing that horrible thumping noise that woke Alex up in the first place.

"He'll break free from those soon." Brendon supplies and Alex is still trying to break free from his iron grip.

"You bastard's! You motherfucker's! I wanted to be with him! I would've changed for him! Why couldn't you selfish bastard's just let me do it!" Alex is screaming, screaming at them all.

"Alex, he wouldn't want that." Gabe says, the boy scoff's, how the hell could Gabe know what Nate want's?

"You heard what he wanted us to do." Ryland says moments later and Alex is screaming no, screaming for them to stop. Despite his promise he doesn't want it to happen, it can't happen.

"Brendon, take him upstairs..." Gabe command's, Alex is screaming, crying but no one is listening to him. They're doing what they think is best, what Nate wanted, no matter how much it's killing Alex.

Alex is upstairs second's later, locked inside his room, dying from heartbreak. Brendon's standing guard outside the door.

They decide to let Gabe be the one to do it. After Alex, Gabe was Nate's best friend. Nate is growling, unable to speak it seem's. Gabe rest's the gun against the side of Nate's head, closes his eyes and pulls the trigger. A loud bang that echoes through the house and leaves the left wall of the infirmary painted in Nate's blood. One that leaves Alex wishing that he were dead.

They end up burning Nate's body a few hours later. They can't afford the luno's to steal another of their friend's. They bring Alex down and he's sullen and quiet and he kisses Nate's dead body before they take him outside, before they pour gas on him and burn the body down to ashes. Alex asks Gabe if he can collect the ashes for him, because he'd like to keep Nate by the windowsill in their room.



Entry fourteen: Damage Control, There's A Ring Around Her Finger

Cassie take's over both Alex and Nate's job. She help's Gabe collect the information. Alex has been in bed since Nate's death, not talking, not eating, nothing but sleeping. It's not unusual, Cassie did the same thing and Ryan wouldn't talk to anyone for days. People handle the death's in their own different ways, this time Cassie is putting it all into work.

They haven't had a death in six months but every time it happens it makes things that much harder, that much harder to believe that things haven't changed all that much.

Gabe is quiet as they work, Cassie doesn't blame him, he's known Nate and Alex longer than any of them.

Pete had found Gabe a long time ago, ran into him and his group when they were fighting and like Gabe's crew were stray kittens or something, Pete brought them home. Back then it had been Gabe, Alex, Nate, Ryland, and Victoria. Cassie misses Victoria because really, it's not like there's a hell of a lot of girls in the house.

Victoria was how they found out that the luno's will always go after girls first.

Krissy knocks on the door to the upstairs room where Cassie and Gabe were transcribing information. They had faxed out the information that last night was a set-up, that Charlie was dead, that presumably no one was running the outlet store.

"Cassie, Ryan want's to go and check out the outlet store...want to come with?" The blonde girl asks, Cassie turn's back to look at the girl. Sometimes it's hard to believe that she and Krissy are the only two girl's left in the house. Cassie looks up at Gabe and he just gives a half smile.

"I got this if you want to go." He tells her so, she nods and stands, follows Krissy downstairs. It's still daylight, four in the afternoon Cassie thinks, she's not exactly sure when time stopped mattering to her. They go outside and Joe is out there, sitting in the driver's seat of the car.

"I thought Ryan was coming?" Krissy says as she spots Joe and opens the passenger side door.

"His ankle is still messed up, Andy said he couldn't go anywhere." Joe tells the two girl's and he pats the side of the seat that he's not currently occupying. The two girl's leave with Joe and Cassie is surprised that no one else want's to come out, that Brendon doesn't want to go with Krissy. Jon would usually ask to come but the two of them haven't talked since their shared kiss in the bunk room.

Cassie is leaning against the window of the truck. Her side of the seat is stained red with dried blood, Nate's blood from the other night. She shudder's lightly and tries to push the thought's away. The sunlight fall's on her, warm and bright and she never thought she would miss the sunlight so much but she does, the warmth and light, you tend to miss it after awhile.

"Do you think love can exist in this world?" Cassie asks many silent moments later. She's not looking at anyone, staring out the window at the long planes of dying grass and gravel, desimated remains of the houses and buildings that used to be here.

"What?" Krissy asks and Cassie tilt's her head to look at the curly haired girl.

"I've been thinking about it a lot lately..." Cassie trail's off, unsure of how to finish that sentence. It's true, as long as lately count's as the night that Jon kissed her. Krissy watches Cassie's face for a moment, surveying before she looks down, thinking of an appropriet response.

"It just doesn't seem like love can exist here..or if it does..it's only for a moment, a brief second in time." The dark haired girl elaborates when Krissy can't seem to think of a proper response.

"But that's the thing. In this world, now all we have are brief moments of time and we should make the most of those moment's." Krissy respond's and the girl was always good at these deep philosophical question's.

"But what happen's when you've had your moment? Is it all just over? Or do you get another chance?" Cassie asks, her gaze flicker's between Krissy and back out to the broken city. Krissy feels pang's of guilt fire up through her body. She knows Cassie is thinking of Patrick, if her moment of happiness is over for good.

"Cassie...I know you loved him..I know you still love him but we both know you have another chance at happiness." Krissy tells her older friend. Cassie looks up obviously surprised at Krissy's words, Cassie knows who the girl's referring to.

"Maybe I'm not ready..."

"Would Patrick really want you to be all alone in this world?"

She knows that Patrick wouldn't.

"He would want you to be happy." Joe interjects, the two girl's take sidelong glances at their curly haired driver.

"I know..." Cassie sighs and she could, she could be with Jon and god knows she could be happy, happy like she used to be but she can't help but feel like she's betraying him, sullying Patrick's memory.

"It's not wrong if you want to be with him...Patrick would want someone to take care of you." Krissy add's. Cassie nods but she feels so conflicted, like she can't make up her mind. She knows that the two of them have valid point's but betraying Patrick isn't the only reason she doesn't want to start anything with Jon. She feels she should keep her other reasons quiet, At least for now.

The three of them arrive at the outlet store, it looks perfectly normal from the outside but then again none of them were here that night, when the fight happened. Joe get's out first, gun raised even though it's daylight and after he's sure things are safe he motions for Cassie and Krissy to follow him into the store.

The inside of the store doesn't really look like a fight took place or that five luno's happened to die in there. A display case has an empty frame, it's glass paneling missing and they know that must be where Gabe crashed into the glass.

"Hello?" Joe call's out, he has the two girl's tucked protectively behind him, Cassie bringing up the rear. "Is anyone here?" Joe calls out again and there is no anwser. It's obvious that someone cleaned the store, not a trace of blood anywhere to be found, no sign that anything even remotely violent happened here.

Suddenly a warm hand comes and wraps around Cassie's mouth, keeping her quiet and pulling her back against a bony chest. Cassie can see a blonde girl doing the same to Krissy and fuck, she's got a gun pressed close to Krissy's skull. Cassie feels the heavy weight of a gun being pressed against her own head and panic rises in her chest.

"Are you luno or human?" A stern voice issues, Joe whips around, his own gun pointed at the person holding Cassie.

"I could ask the same of you." Joe replies his blue green eyes narrowed at the the blonde girl, who is actually much shorter than Krissy, but the threat of a gun is stopping her from making a move.

"Just anwser the question mop top." The man commands and Joe scowl's at the nickname for his mass of huge dark curly hair..

"We're human's...all three of us...now let the girl's go." He command's but the man holding Cassie looks wary. "We're from the hideout ten minutes from here..we came to see if everything was alright because of what happened the other night." Joe add's, trying to convince them that they're all human's, they're all on the same side here.

"They know about what happened..." The blonde girl's feather light voice ring's out and she looks uncertainly over at the boy. She looks like hostage style combat isn't her thing.

"Not only do we know about what happened...we were the one's it happend to!"Joe shout's, his voice raising. Okay, so maybe not them exactly but fuck it , it was close enough. Instantly the hand on Cassie's mouth slides away, the gun leaves her head and she finally, finally, feels like she can breath again. Cassie whirl's around slapping her former captor hard across the face, she probably wouldn't have if she had remembered that he currently had a gun.

The guy didn't do anything but Joe does grab Cassie pulling her back, just in case the guy has a temper. The shorter blonde curly haired girl releases Krissy and the girl looks afraid that she might get slapped too. Krissy just strides back to stand next to Cassie, looking extreamly pissed off and Joe consider's it sheer luck that Brendon didn't come with them because if he had, this guy would be screwed.

The guy is tall, like, Gabe tall. He has dark brown hair that's stuck between long and short that frames his long face. He's got matching wide dark brown eyes, semi large teeth and a squared jaw. The guy is also super skinny and bony, with a frame that almost looks like it belong's to a girl.

"I'm sorry." The boy says and he looks like he mean's it but his voice is hard and his pale cheek is turning red from where Cassie had struck him. "It's just..we can't be too careful you know?" He add's, he shrugs and scratches at his arm. Joe nods, lets himself relax just the slightest bit.

"Believe me, we know."

So, they do introductions and the guy is named William and the blonde girl with the long curly hair and pretty face is named Greta. William tells them that he and Greta were staying in a hideout twenty minutes from the outlet store and that after they found out that the shop was abandoned they had decided to take it over. He tells them that all they really had was each other and Cassie isn't sure whether or not the two are dating.

Joe has taken to talking to William while Cassie and Krissy chat with Greta.

"Where do you two plan to stay?" Krissy asks Greta as they lean against the counter. It's rare to see another girl around because honestly, in the chain of who the luno's hunt first it's; children, then girl's, then men. They haven't seen a kid in forever, they haven't seen another girl since Victoria.

Greta shrugs, twirl's a blonde curl around her finger. "I go wherever William goes." She tells the two of them.

"So, you two are dating then?" Cassie asks, she really misses girl talk like this. Greta's cheek's go a slight shade of pink but she nods.

"He saved my life a year ago..I've been following him since." Greta admits. "I guess we'll just stay here..at the store."

Krissy exchanges a look with Cassie and it's like their having a silent conversation with Greta watching.

In the end they ask Joe to ask William if he wanted to come and stay with them at the hideout. William says no but then he looks at Greta and the look in her eyes and he sighs before he finally give's in. So, they take William and Greta home with them. Krissy drives and Greta rides in the front next to Cassie, William and Joe occupying the back.

They get back and it take's around three minutes to introduce them to everyone. Alex doesn't come down but Gabe does and Gabe seems instantly enthralled by William. The guys' seem a little eager to have Greta around, a new girl, and Cassie and Krissy both expect it but they worry that Greta will be freaked out by it. William might be worried too because he grab's Greta's hand, making a show that the two of them are together and shooting down any idea's the other boy's might have.

Greta and William settle in, Greta better than her boyfriend but at least that's two more people, two more people on their side.

It's around five in the morning when Cassie tries to go to sleep. She's not exactly tired but her mind is so full of thought's, she wonder's if Greta and William will be happy here? If Alex will wonder if they're trying to replace Nate? If they should inform the two newcomers that Brendon is part luno? Her thought's are too heavy for her head and she just want's to sleep them off.

No one else is asleep yet. They're mostly getting to know the newbies. Cassie hears footsteps in the room but she doesn't exactly care who it is, it could be anyone. The footsteps get closer and eventually stop very close to Cassie's bunk. The girl is turned on her side, facing Jenny and Ryan's empty bunk because she didn't really feel like staring at Jon's.

The soft squeak of a bunk being sat in issues around the room and it was right behind her, Cassie's breath catches and she wonder's if it's Jon.

"Cassie...you asleep?" Jon's voice is soft in the dark. She thinks about ignoring him, pretending to be asleep but it just doesn't feel right so she does anwser him.

"Yeah....what's up?"

"I..just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry." His voice again is so soft with just the tiniest bit of sadness sinking through. Cassie stay's on her side, doesn't want to look at him quite yet.

"For what?" She has a pretty good idea of what he's sorry for but she still ask's on the offchance that she's wrong.

"For kissing you." The dark haired girl's heart jump's and now she's turning automatically, her eyes searching for him in the darkness.

"You don't have to apologize for that." She tells him, she's propped up on her elbows and she can just make him out, his strong form outlined by the light from the kitchen.

"No, I do. I know you're not over Patrick..it was a mistake..I shouldn't have done it. So, I'm sorry." Jon sound's so earnest and cautious, so heartbreakingly honest.

Cassie doesn't want him to regret it, to think it was a mistake. She doesn't want him to be sorry for it.

"I-What do you think of the newcomers?" The girl knows it's a gutless move, that she's changing the subject but no, she doesn't want to deal with this right now.

"Uh..they seem nice.." Jon is obviously confused about the sudden change in topic.

"What about Greta?" Okay, so that kind of slipped out but she really want's to know what Jon thinks about her.

"She's seem's fine."

"Do you think she's pretty?"

"Are..are you seriously asking me this?" Again he sound's confused. Cassie doesn't know why she's doing this to the both of them, why she's bringing up shit that doesn't matter. Jon should've just let her sleep.

"I just want to know."

"She's pretty." Jon starts and Cassie feels her heart freeze a bit. "But she's nothing compared to you." He finishes and it's so soft that she almost misses it, yet she catches every word.

"Don't say stuff like that." She tells him and she rolls so she's on her back, staring up at the dark ceiling.

"I mean it, Cassie...I think it's pretty fucking obvious but I'm kind of in love with you." And wow, who the hell has Jon been talking to while she was gone because he's being pretty forward now.

"Jon-"

"But I get it if you don't feel the same...I'm not expecting you to just forget about him but still..I wanted you to know." He tells her and it sound's like he's closer.

Krissy's words from earlier echo in Cassie's mind, about how you need to seize the moment, be happy while you can, carpe diem and all that stuff but it's not that easy, it's not just the Patrick thing. Cassie's afraid, afraid of something she can't control.

"It's not just Patrick, Jon." Cassie sit's up and she turn's to face him, she can barely make him out in the dark but she knows he's there.

"Then what is it?" He sound's frustrated, the first time in a long time that she's heard him that way.

"It's..it's just that everyone I love..everyone who loves me. They end up dying Jon! I'm-I'm like a jinx or something! And I can't...I can't be the reason you die." She's trying so hard not to cry, she's been crying too much lately but now she's saying everything that's been on her mind and Jon is telling her he loves her.

"You seriously feel that way?" Cassie feels his hand press into her's and suddenly his face is above her's and there's enough light for her to be able to see him now, soft, slightly scruffy face and dark eyes filled with concern. The girl nods.

"I can't help it." It's the truth, Jenny, then Patrick, everyone she truly care's about eventually get's taken away and she can't help but feel like it's her fault.

His hand squeezes her's tighter. "You're not a jinx...and even if you were..Cassie, I wouldn't care. I would be more than willing to take that risk." He's close to her, his face so close and she can see him and smell him, her breath coming in short burst's.

"Jon..." She's trying to make sense of this all, trying to be okay with what she thinks is happening, trying not to think about Patrick.

"Cassie, please, just let me take care of you." He cut's her off, whispers and she can feel his breath. It would be so easy to let go, to become Jon's, to let him take care of her. Krissy was right, her moment wasn't over, here was her second chance and she just has to hope that Patrick would want her to be happy, to find love again.

"Okay." She whispers back, gives in and she can see him smile, so soft and warm in the dark, before he lowers his head and they're kissing, for the second time they're kissing and it's so much better than Cassie ever thought it could be.



Entry fifteen: Finding Happiness In Misery

Jon can't believe Cassie agreed to it, to them being together like he wanted them to be. It's been so long since any of them has had physical contact, the only one getting any on a regular basis being Krissy and Brendon. So, really it's only natural that once he and Cassie opened the floodgates, they just couldn't stop.

They're kissing now, he's on top of her on the bunk, her body pressed so close to his. Their mouth's tangle hot and wet and even though this is great, this is what he's wanted, he can't stop thinking of Patrick. Of how so long ago he made the other boy a promise, one that he's still keeping.

Jon and Cassie shed their clothes, moving quicker than they normally would. He pulls the blanket over them, her finger's tangling in his hair and their mouth's connected. Moment's later their making love, Jon knows it sound's cheesy to say it but that's the only way to describe it, this isn't sex, isn't fucking. It's making love.

The two of them are trying desperately to be quiet. "Jon." She breathes into his ear and his body shivers.
*********
"Jon." Patrick call's to the boy. Jon looks up from paper he is reading, it's just him and Patrick in the upstairs room, everyone else is sleeping.

"Yeah?" Jon asks, his eyes locked with Patrick's.

"Will you do something for me?"

"What is it Patrick?" Jon is asking, he leans against the wall, waiting for the other boy to say something. Patrick is turned toward's the window, staring out at the broken land around them. Patrick turn's back, his blue eyes are shining behind the square pair of glasses he's wearing, he looks conflicted and Jon is a little concerned, maybe he and Cassie had been fighting.

"I want you to do something for me...if you will." His voice is strange too, Patrick has a habit of being overly hopeful, very optimistic considering the situations.

"Just tell me what it is." Jon request's, he fold's his hands across his muscular chest and waits.

Patrick still looks conflicted like he isn't sure if he should even say anything at all. They had just lost Spencer a few months ago, maybe it has something to do with that.

"Well, this..it's just that in this world..god, anything could happen, and with Spencer..what just happened to him..I want to have some back-up." Patrick tells him, his voice is soft, maybe a little frightened but Jon isn't sure. The younger boy is confused and he's waiting for more of an explanation from the older, ginger haired boy.

"I'm not really following." Jon admits, he thinks that Patrick should be talking to Pete about whatever this is, this sound's like a Pete kind of situation.

"I know this is going to sound weird." Patrick starts, Jon grow's a little nervous.

"It's okay." Jon says, urging him to continue. Patrick nods, his eyes flickering to the dingy floor.

"Okay, Well, here's the thing. If something happen's to me..if I die, I want you to take care of Cassie for me."

"You want me to what?" Jon asks sounding surprised, honestly, that was like, the last thing he expected from the boy. Patrick looks up with seriousness in his large eyes.

"I'm serious Jon. If something happen's to me...will you take care of her?" Patrick sound's so desperate, a sad hollow kind of sound echoing around the room, chasing his words.

"Take care of her like how?" Jon asks, this conversation is now both strange and just the tiniest bit creepy.

"Watch over her for me. Keep her safe." Patrick elaborates and his eyes are searching into Jon's. Silently begging because Patrick isn't the begging kind, isn't the type of person to go asking for help. Jon just seem's more confused.

"Why me?" Seriously, of all the people in this house; Pete, Ryan and Brendon, Krissy, any one of them would do over Jon wouldn't they?

"Well..you're the only one I really trust." That admission was surprising, Jon never thought he and Patrick were that close, though there was a certain closeness between everyone in the house but Jon never felt like he and Patrick were confidant's, not close enough to ask such a serious task of him.

"I mean..why not Pete?" Jon asks, because those two are best friends and it seems much more likely that the slightly chubby boy would ask his best friend as opposed to Jon. Patrick shrugs and he's looking back out the window again, the sunlight slanting into the room in golden ray's.

"I was going to ask Pete but the way he fight's...he's pretty much crazy, not very reliable." Patrick tells him, his voice is thick and Jon has to remind himself that Patrick is talking about what would happen to his wife in the event of his death.

"Patrick, why are you talking about death when I hear you always telling Cassie that you'll be okay?" Jon doesn't know if he's stepped the line here, he doesn't want Patrick pissed off at him.

"Sometime's it's harder to believe." Is his only reply and the other boy is a little disenchanted at the fact that their resident optimist is now losing that faith. They're silent, the subject matter settling heavy around them. Jon thinks about what Patrick is asking, it's not a hard request, not really. He like's Cassie, she's a smart, sweet girl with a big heart. It's not like it would be much trouble and if Patrick care's enough to ask him well, then the decision isn't too hard.

"I'll do it Patrick." Jon says and he mean's it. If something happens to Patrick, he'll watch over Cassie.

Patrick turn's and smiles and he move's clapping the taller boy on the shoulder. "Thanks man." Patrick tells him, Jon nods.

"One more thing?" Patrick says quietly, his hand still on Jon's shoulder.

"Yeah?"

"If we get in a fight and you're there and she's there and we're in trouble...save her before me okay?" It's a lot of hypothetical circumstance and it might be harder for Jon to do but again he agree's, he'll do it for Patrick.

There's a thumping on the stairs and the door to the room swing's open. Cassie's standing there, an easy smile on her pretty face, a smile only for Patrick. Jon remembers when she could smile so easily.

"I was looking for you." She tells Patrick and the boy moves away from Jon, over to his wife and he take's her hand, the still new wedding ring gleaming on her finger.

"I'm sorry." Patrick tells her, he leans in and kisses her lightly.

Jon watches them go and he really, really hopes that he never has to fufill that promise.
*****************

afterwards he eases off of her and pulls the blanket tight around the two of them. She's resting on his chest, her hand splayed across the pale skin. Cassie kisses Jon, soft and light as she closes her eyes. He relishes the fact that for a moment they can forget all about the luno's, about fighting and dying and just be with one another. Maybe that's more important than anything.

He knows that this is a good thing, that they can be good together. They can find happiness admist all the misery and Jon closes his eyes, ignoring the gleam of Cassie's wedding ring in the slight light of the room.



Entry sixteen: The City Is Burning, The Ocean Is Churning

"What are you smiling about?" Krissy asks her boyfriend as they sit in the living room together. Brendon's has had his fill of the newcomers, retiring to the living room to be alone, Krissy follow's even though the girl still kind of want's to talk to Greta. She also want's to go to bed but Brendon asked her to wait. The boy looks over at her and he's still smiling, not a lot make's Brendon smile these days.

"Did you talk to Cassie in the car?" He asks, his girlfriend blinks at him a few times before she nods.

"Yeah, did you talk to Jon while we were gone?" She presses, Brendon nods, still smirking. "Why do you ask?" Krissy is saying, really Brendon is being odd tonight.

"I ask because our plan worked perfectly." He tells her, his arm tight around her shoulder. Krissy's face fall's blank for a moment before she cock's an eyebrow at him.

"What? How do you know?"

"Because, I could smell them together." Brendon states rather bluntly and it take's Krissy a moment before she comprehend's what her boyfriend is telling her but when she does her nose crinkles.

"Oh, ew! You're a perv!" She tells him, pushing at him gently.

"Why am I a perv? I can't help what I smell." Brendon replies much too innocently for the times they live in, Krissy rolls her eyes.

"It's not the fact that you smelled it but the fact that you're grinning about it." She replies and it's Brendon's turn to roll his eyes.

"But you're happy now right? Because she'll be happy?" The boy asks, quiet, his brown eyes searching her's. Krissy nods, laces their fingers together.

"She deserves it and I know he'll protect her." The girl says, she's staring at their linked hands. Brendon leans over and kisses her forehead.

"We can go to bed now." He tells her and the smirk he was previously wearing has slid back to his young face. Krissy pushes him playfully but nods all the same and allows Brendon to carry her to the bunk's.

William isn't sure about being here, at this place with these people that he knows nothing about. Greta seem's fine with it but Greta always has been the trusting kind, it's her one flaw. They're laying together in a bunk pressed against the opposite wall. The bunk room kind of reminds William of summer camp or those bedroom's you see in orphanges. How the bed's are all in the same room and spaced apart equally, lining both wall's.

From his and Greta's bunk William can see some of the other's who live here. There's a dark haired girl and guy who appear to be sleeping together, that blonde girl that came to the store and a guy who he thinks is named Brendon, are in a different bunk. Empty bunk's are scattered around but that frail looking, Ryan guy, that seem's to be a kind of leader here, is sleeping next to that same dark haired guy and girl, the girl that William thinks was the one whose head he held a gun to.

The tall guy named Gabe apparently sleep's upstairs, along with someone named Alex, someone that William hasn't met yet.

Greta makes a sleepy noise and presses herself closer to William. He looks down at her and smiles. She like's it here, so he'll stay for her benefit.

The thing is that William has trouble trusting people, even Greta in the beginning. He's never been around this many unfamilar people since the luno outbreak. He was in the beginning but those were his people, people he knew he could trust.

William knows that he's jaded, that he's cold and oftentime's ruthless. He's not exactly sure if he'll fit with these people, these people seem kind, seem soft and compassionate. He's not used to that kind of thing either. Like he said before, he can't trust people so, even though everyone here seem's nice enough and Greta like's them, he can't really allow himself to relax. William's staying on constant guard, even when he should be asleep.

Before Greta had fallen asleep she had told him that she had talked to that Alex person, the only person that William didn't meet. She told him that Alex just lost his lover, her eyes heavy with her own memories as she told him. The boy knew she was thinking about her fiance, Bob, about what had happened so long ago. Sometimes William wishes they could both forget about it.

He'd been all alone before Greta, all on his own. He moved from place to place just surviving, searching for something that Sisky believed was a lost cause. Something that William had to find to even begin to move on with his life. He'd been walking through this desolet little town, so small that perhaps it was looked over? That it had somehow survived?

William doesn't like to think about it much, about the day he both met and had hurt Greta so terribly. There's a noise and William shoot's up, his hand goes to the gun strapped on his leg. It's just a person heading to bed, that doctor, Andy. Andy just gives William an odd look before he shuffles to a nearby bunk and lay's down.

The boy too lay's back, his hand leaving the familar warmth of the gun. Greta snuggles in closer to him and he finally lets his caramel colored eyes slip closed. He's trying to let himself relax here, if only for tonight, if only for her sake.

Again Ryan is awake before everyone else. It might be the fact that he can't quite get comfortable with new people in the house, the same thing happened back when Gabe and his crew joined them. It takes him a while to get used to new people nowadays but Ryan barely slept at all.

He's outside again, sitting by the graves. Moreso Spencer's grave because his is the only one left. Ryan's mind feels too heavy, he's caught up in his own head, feels like he's drowning in the house, he just need's to be outside. Ryan saw Cassie and Jon sleeping together on his way outside. Jon was holding her close, long stretches of pale skin that Ryan could see, Cassie's head tucked protectively under Jon's chin. It was more than obvious that they had slept together.

Something about that bother's Ryan. The fact that Cassie and Jon are together now, are being whatever the hell it is they're being. It's not so much the fact that she's with Jon but the fact that she's not all alone now, she's not hung up on her past like she used to be. Ryan always felt that he and Cassie shared a bond of despair, that he didn't have to feel alone in his sadness because she felt the same way but now she moved on. If she moved on, if she's over that sadness and found a new happiness, that meant he was all alone.

Ryan pulls his knees to his thin chest, the back of his pant's getting dirty from sitting on the ground. He wraps his long arms around his knees. The boy looks to the left, to where Jenny's empty grave now sit's. He doesn't want to think about it, think about how she's not where he left her. He quickly looks to the right at Spencer's fixed grave, Brendon having been nice enough to re-burry all the dirt.

"Hey, Spence." Ryan starts, he drops a hand from his knee and lets his nimble finger's trail along the cold makeshift head stone. It never really stop's feeling ridiculous, like he's talking to himself out here next to his best friend's grave. "Sorry, I haven't been out here in awhile." He says and if he closes his eyes and tries hard enough he can picture Spencer sitting next to him.

"You know I'm no good at this kind of stuff." It's true, he never has been good at dealing with death, Spencer knew that first hand when Ryan's dad died. Ryan looks down at the fixed dirt, how the grave kind of looks fresh and new again, how that makes a sick feeling drop into his stomach.

"I'm sorry we had to dig up your grave." Ryan is apologizing, his knuckles dragging around in the dirt where he's sitting. He didn't actually look in Spencer's coffin, he knew he couldn't do it. Brendon did it instead, he was the one to crack open the casket and peer inside.

Ryan never asked what Spencer looked like but he could tell by the look on Brendon's face that it wouldn't be pretty. He doesn't want to imagine his best friend as a rotting corpse, or as dirty dingy bone's, he can't. Ryan want's to remember Spencer as he was. Those bright blue eyes, that winning smile and the way he always, always knew what to do to keep Ryan calm.

If life were fair, Ryan would never have lost Spencer. Would never have lost his support system, the thing that kept him sane. But life wasn't fair and he did lose Spence, that night, much like the night Jenny died, still haunt's Ryan.

It happened almost right after things changed. They were still managing to stay at the apartment building by the college, the luno's hadn't spread everywhere yet, they kept by the edges of town back then. Small infestation's that attacked. The army had tried to keep the luno's down, to spread a false sense of security to the people, spread lies to keep them all blissfully ignorant to the danger they were in.

They all lived in that apartment until the night the luno's broke into town, killing anyone they happened to find on the streets and crashing into houses, building's, car's.

Ryan, Spencer, and Jenny had been in the building at the time. Watching the chaos from the window's of the sixth floor. The soliders had shown up too, fighting the luno's but they were easily overpowered. Explosions and scream's echoed through the night and Ryan could only watch, watch as the world as he knew it was torn away from him. He thinks that it was that moment that he knew things would never be the same. That life would be different from here on out.

Spencer had pulled Ryan away from the window, told him not to watch. Jenny had been alternating between calling Cassie's and Krissy's cell's. Ryan misses cell phones.

It end's up that Cassie and Patrick were hiding out at the mall, locked in a backroom while Krissy and Brendon had been at the supermarket where Krissy worked, they too were hiding but they all made it back to the apartment building in one piece.

Shortly after that, the frequency of luno's coming into the city increased and things got a hell of a lot more dangerous. People started leaving during the day, finding new hiding places and buying gun's. Ryan had been paranoid with Pete one day and they had bought gun's as well. Spencer didn't think they needed gun's, Spencer was used to being Ryan's voice of reason, his sounding board, Ryan's protector.

Ryan thinks it happened quickly, almost like it happened overnight. The quick slide from maintaining a normal life into something that's so far from normal, things that involved killing and hiding, that involved dealing with death and fighting to survive. things that Ryan wasn't adapting to.

As the city became more and more dangerous they decided that they should leave it. They called families, called friend's communicated while they still could. And just like that, they left.

They spent their night's running, hiding, huddled together under shitty bridges and fighting other people for space and safety. Ryan was too young back then and even though only a year has passed and he's not even that much older than he was back then, he knows he's older mentally. Back then he actually believed that death couldn't touch them, that they'd somehow miraculously be skipped over, like they'd all be together forever. How fucking stupid he was.

The night Spencer died they had been moving along as they usually did. They all pretty much sucked at using weapons of any sort and they had mostly gotten by due to luck, Ryan thinks their luck must've ran out that night.

"We're never going to find a good enough place to live." Ryan breathes, his breath coming out in puff's of white air. It's freezing cold and the clouds are thick around them,.

"I think it's going to rain." Pete states, blowing off Ryan's statement. They can't allow themselves to think negative thoughts, they have to keep going, keep the will to survive. Spencer's on Ryan's left, Jenny on his right and the girl is squeezing his hand, she too is ignoring his statement, she's not the most positive person in the world so, he's thinking that they're sharing the same thought's.

"We'll find a place Ry." Spencer tells him, his arm brushing against Ryan's. The older boy spares his best friend a glance and allows himself a small smile. Spencer feels like he's making some kind of progress if he can get Ryan to smile. Unfortunately for all of them Pete was right and it starts to rain several minutes later.

There's no place to go, no place to hide and they're drenched in moment's. A cold rain dousing them and their clothes are sticking to skin, hair falling into eyes. Patrick, being the constant gentleman gives his hat to his girlfriend so, at least she's something akin to dry. Ryan wishes he wore a hat so he could give it to Jenny. She doesn't seem to mind too much though, just hold's his hand tighter. Pete has Ashlee, keep's her close to him even though he can't do much to keep her dry.

They walk in the downpour, it makes it harder to see and Ryan is just that much more paranoid. The luno's, those fuckers are always looking for an easy kill, they have no qualms about kicking someone when they're already down. They thrive on trickery. They walked fifteen minutes in silence, in the only kind of peace they could have while getting hit with icy droplets of rain.

Suddenly two figures emerge from the small thick section of tree's that line both side's of the path they're walking. They had been walking out in what they thought was the country, for awhile now. The figures stopped a few feet from their group, watching them. Their group stop's too and they're watching each other, Ryan's eyes flickering to Pete because Pete had this shit down, he was adapting the quickest to this new world.

"Who are you?" Pete call's, his voice dark and unwavering. The two figures, tall and a bit on the bulky side don't say anything but move just a little closer to their group. "Stay back." Pete orders, his hand moving to where he hides his gun. Ryan's eyes widen, They've rarely had to use their gun's and now, now they did?

"Eight boys and four girl's." One of the two figures, a man says. Ryan feels confused but he glances at Jenny at the other's around him. It's too dark, it's raining thickly around them, there should be no way for the two guys to be able to tell how many girl's they have. Ryan is instantly supicious.

"Luno's." Pete breathes out, the group tensing at the word. The two figures laugh and make like they're going to strike. Anyone who has a weapon pulls it out and the guys' push the girl's behind them, the whole lot of them making a circle, girl's inside with the guys' back's to them, protecting them from the creatures. The two creatures laugh at them, scoffing at their feeble attempt at saving themselves.

The assumed beast's charge suddenly, coming at either side of them. Pete, ever the impulsive person fires instantly, not caring at the moment if he was wrong, if these were human men. Ryan doesn't think they are because they're fast, faster than anyone he's ever seen in his life. He grip's his own gun, feels Spencer tense next to him. It all feels like some deranged version of musical chairs, where they're just waiting for the music to stop, waiting to see who the beast's try to take out.

Turn's out the beast's think Ryan and Patrick are the weakest of the men and they charge at them, breaking through the group and tackling people to the ground. Ryan's pinned down on his back on the cold, slick ground. The luno's on top of him and he can't see anything, nothing but the beast above him. It's dark eyes managing to shine bright, hot breath and wicked teeth. Ryan can't move, either from the beast on top of him or from his own fear. He's not strong, he's too weak for this world, for this group. Maybe he would be better off dead, better for his friend's.

The noises around Ryan had turned into a sort of white noise, things he couldn't dechipher like gunshot's and screaming. It all feels so far away. The luno is staring at him with those shining eyes and Ryan is losing the ability to think, everything is hazy and his body feels numb, he's not sure what's happening but it can't be good....

Just as suddenly the beast is looking away, looking pissed and it's like Ryan's world explodes back into existance because he can think again, he can feel his body and hear everything around him. He can also see Spencer on the beast's back, his pale hands wrapped around it's thick neck, attempting to throw it off of Ryan.

"Spencer.." Ryan says soft, too soft for the situation. Spencer eyes him with those sharp blues.

"Ryan, get away from it." Spencer command's and Ryan realizes that he's still under the beast, the luno whose distracted by his best friend. Ryan scrambles away just enough and he see's the circle has been repaired but is missing people. The other luno is by Pete and Brendon, the three of them circling each other, trying not to let their back's be turned. Spencer is the only one with Ryan but Jon is looking over here like he's not sure what to do.

Ryan hears him swear and he's out of the circle, running to where they are but not fast enough to stop the beast from flipping Spencer off of him, making the younger boy fall hard on the damp ground, hitting it with a wet smack. It's still raining, everything slick and wet, making everything that much harder. The luno is on Spencer now, attempting to do the same thing to him that it had done to Ryan.

Ryan has a gun as does Jon, who skid's but manages to make it over to them. Jon aim's and is shooting point blank at the creature. Burn bullets weren't even around back then so, the luno is more or less unaffected but the beast lifts it's head, eyes Jon and it tighten's it's grip on Spencer's arms, sharp nail's digging into soft skin, making crimson blood stain Spencer's white hoodie. He cries out and Ryan, always blindly devoted to his best friend charges forward to stop the luno. The creature throws it's arm out and knock's Ryan away, leaving him skidding through the mud and wet grass.

He's back up and the luno is standing, pulling Spencer up, holding him like he's a shield. That was around the first time that they learned that luno's play dirty. Ryan run's back over and Jon is standing there, gun aimed at the thing but the luno is talking, saying something that Ryan can't hear. Jon looks pissed and Spencer is struggling in the luno's grasp. Ryan get's back over there in time to hear the ending of the conversation.

"If you try to kill me, I'll kill this one." The luno is saying, eyeing the struggling Spencer.

"Spencer!" Ryan shout's, startled by the words and Spencer turn's his head, looks at Ryan with wide eyes.

"It'll be okay Ry. Jon, fucking don't worry about me! Shoot this goddamned thing!" Spencer orders but Jon shakes his head, obviously taking the creature's threat seriously.

"Isn't it sweet? He doesn't want to hurt me, to save you." The luno growls out and Ryan growls back, bites at his lip. A scream issues from the other side of the grounds, a scream hard to hear through the constant pounding of the rain. Ryan turn's back and the other luno is on the ground, presumably dead. Pete and Brendon standing by it's body. This new turn of event's does nothing but serve to piss off the luno holding Spencer. "You little children..." He starts weakly, his voice filled with rage.

"You pathetic little human's killed him?" He says it like he can't believe it. Hell, Ryan barely believes it.

"Don't worry, you'll see him soon enough." Ryan says through gritted teeth. The luno is looking up at him, a quiet amusement in his eyes, he leans down and sniff's at Spencer's neck.

"I could just turn this one...an eye for an eye you know?" The beasts says and Spencer is trashing but the luno is too strong and he can't get away. Pete and Brendon are running toward's them now, their wet footstep's echoing in the night air.

All Ryan is thinking is 'Let Spencer go.' a chant in his head, a repeating chorus. 'Let him go, let him go, let him go.'

The luno seem's to know it's outnumbered, know that it's going to get killed if he doesn't get out of here right now.

"An eye for an eye." He repeat's and there's a flash of silver caught in the light, a knife as Ryan's mind quickly put's together and he's screaming before he really understand's what he's screaming about. The knife slide's easily into Spencer's torso and just as quickly out again. The beast pushes Spencer away, Jon moving forward and grabbing him up before the youngest boy can hit the ground. The luno is running but Pete is hot on his tail, shooting all the while.

Ryan stumbles to where Jon is now sinking to his knees, a bleeding Spencer in his arms. There's a deep slit in Spencer's stomach, blood gushing out through his t-shirt and drenching his hoodie. Ryan can't breath, can't think of anything but Spencer. He pulls him away from Jon, hold's him in his own arms. Rain mixing with blood and trailing off into rivet's along the ground.

"Spence? Spencer, are you okay?" Ryan is pleading, goddamn thankful that it's raining because he's crying now. Spencer's eyes are flickering with pain, a look that Ryan recongizes, you don't spend all your life with someone and not know their facial expressions.

"Could be better." He whispers, Ryan's fingers tighten around him. He knows nothing about stab wound's, nothing medical beyond the fact that this can't be good. He can't deal with death, he can't lose Spencer...

"Jon, Jon can't we do something?" Ryan is pleading with the older boy like Jon knows what to do and just won't share. In all of Ryan's time knowing him he's rarely seen Jon Walker look sad, but this, this look on Jon's face is beyond sad, it's heartwrenching. Jon is stuck between a shrug and a shake of the head but Andy is coming over there, Andy who was studying pre-med in college.

Andy drops by Spencer, undoes the wounded boy's hoodie. He delicately lifts Spencer's shirt and is looking down at the deep gash caused by the knife. Andy's hazel eyes are heavy and he looks at Ryan, gives a little shake of his head, silently telling Ryan that there's nothing they can do. Ryan is sobbing, looking down at Spencer and sobbing. He knows that there are first's for everything in life. There are people who are alway's the first for something but he never wanted the first friend to get killed to be Spencer, please not Spencer.

Jenny is next to him, right by his side. The other's are too, a myriad of solemn faces and Spencer is looking at Ryan. He's staring and he looks paler but Ryan tells himself that it's because of the rain. He doesn't think about how Spencer is dying, about how the only family he has besides his girlfriend, is dying in his arms.

"Ry...Ryan." Spencer's voice issues out weakly against the rain. He lifts his arm, want's Ryan's hand and the older boy gives it to him, their hands clasped together tight.

"Spence, Don't worry...We'll find a hospital somewhere, someone who can help you." Even as Ryan says it he knows it's all bullshit. Spencer knows too.

"You'll be okay Spencer." Ryan tries weakly, he's crying and he knows that Spencer knows he's crying.

"No, you'll be okay Ross." Spencer tells him, the slightest of smiles on his face. "I taught you well, you'll survive. You'll be okay."

"Spencer, don't fucking do that. Don't try to say goodbye because you can't go anywhere! You can't!" Ryan is pretending that saying it will make it happen. Everyone around them knows what's happening, knows that Spencer is dying, Spencer knows too but they're all too good at pretending.

"You gotta keep Jon and Brendon in line." Spencer jokes, Ryan spares a glance at the boy's in question, Jon's head is bowed, rain dripping off the end of his long bang's, his shoulder's shaking. maybe Jon's crying too. Brendon is standing still, his face soft and heartbreaking, Ryan shakes his head.

"That's your job Spence."

"Ryan, just promise me you won't regress now okay? Don't go back to that six year old kid I met so long ago alright? Be who you are now, be my best friend." Spencer chokes out, Ryan is nodding and he's brushing his lips across Spencer's hand and he doesn't care.

"I'll still be with you Ryan so, don't stop talking to me." Ryan thinks that Spencer's eyes look dimmer, he pray's he's imagining it.

"Spencer please. I love you...you're my best friend...I need you." Ryan is pleading like, this is something Spencer can change.

"Love you too Ryan...listen, if I see your dad...I'll tell him how amazing you are...I'll tell him to be proud of you." Ryan is crying so hard and he doesn't even know that he just started a rule, a way to handle death situations. "I'll tell him." Spencer repeats and he's still staring up at the sky, the rain hitting him when he stop's breathing.

"Spencer?" He tries to get him to talk. "Spencer?" His voice raises higher. "Spencer, please talk to me!" He's shaking him but Spencer is gone, his best friend is gone.

"He's gone Ryan." Brendon says from behind him, his voice is tight. Other people are crying but he doesn't give a damn because they didn't just lose their best friend. Ryan hold's Spencer's body close, rock's him back and forth and sob's out all the pain, the rain pouring down on them.

Eventually they pry Spencer away, Jenny instantly there to take the boy's place. Ryan grab's on to her, shaking fingers tangled in her jacket. What's worse is they have no permanent place to stay, no where to bury Spencer. They have to bury him there, in that grassy clearing surrounded by the wood's. Pete, Jon, and Brendon do it. They mark it with a stone and just like that they have to keep moving, Ryan has to leave his best friend behind.

Ryan knows now that Spencer's death was what made him so damn protective of everyone. He was filling Spencer's void, being what Spencer wanted, not going backwards only moving forward. He's the one taking care of people now, not the other way around, he's strong because Spencer wanted him to be and because Spencer is watching him.

After they found their hideout five months later Ryan wanted Spencer back home with him. He never asked anyone to go and collect the body, never asked Pete and the new half luno Brendon to go and find Spencer's body, never asked to bring him back and bury him so he wouldn't have to be alone. They just did it and Ryan was glad because after five months, Spencer was home.



Entry seventeen: I swear I'd burn the city down to show you the light

"We're going to be together forever right?" It's a voice, a girl, so soft and scared. He thinks wherever he is it feels warm, it is warm. Everything is cloudy and white around the edges, he can't see details, no faces. He can't hear names, like spots are censored, edited out or something.

"As long as I can help it we will be." A man's voice, familar but he can't place it. Nothings clear, like a foggy dream. The warmth is back again, soft hands maybe lips.

"I love you." The girl's voice again, echoing like it's so, so far away. The voice makes him ache, he want's to follow it, be close to it and bask in the comfort that resides there. The warmth drains away from him and the scene changes, dark, so dark and the voice isn't soft, it sound's so heartwrenchingly broken. "Don't leave me."

Suddenly it all melt's away and his eyes are flickering open. He's in the semi dark room, the purple light of the setting sun casting strange glows around the room. He sits up and he's sweating, he's trying so hard to keep the memories of the dream. He's more than desperate to figure out what it all means.

That warmth, that voice, they all drive him crazy. She's looking over at him from her spot in the room, dark eyes flickering with interest. "You were having those dreams again weren't you?" She asks and he nods, hand brushing the sweat slicked bang's out of his face. He really doesn't like the dreams, doesn't know what they are, what the hell they even mean. Noah always tells him to ignore them, brush them aside as nothing more than figments of his imagination but he can't accept that. They have to be something more.

"I wish I had dreams." The girl says with a hint of want, of lamenting the fact that she doesn't have them. He shakes his head.

"I wish I didn't." He tells her. The girl named Ruby shakes her head and moves over to his bed, sit's down in front of him. Ruby's short hair brushes against her shoulders, she props her hands up under her chin and peers at him with dark eyes.

"Tell me about it?" She asks, voice soft but no where near the one in his dreams. He looks at her for a moment before she slips her hand into his and he sighs, defeated.

"It's just the voices...it's like, I'm listening to them talk but I don't know what any of it mean's. I don't know who's talking and why everything feels so warm and then cold and...I wake up feeling so broken." He explains to her. Ruby is watching with interest, a sort of jealousy, she's told him numerous times that she want's to have dreams too, want's to know what having them is like.

Ruby sits up and nuzzles against his neck, places a soft kiss on his jaw. "You're so lucky Jack." She whispers but Jack doesn't exactly feel lucky. Jack can feel the brush of her sharp teeth on his skin. It's getting dark so they can go out soon. Jack shift's his hand to her shoulder, leans down and presses their lips together softly. He vaugely wonders how long he can go without sleeping.
*
The next day William and Greta go to run the outlet store while Cassie and Krissy allow themselves to indulge in a little girl talk, mostly talking about how Cassie is now with Jon. Jon is pointedly avoiding Brendon and is instead hanging around Ryan and Gabe. And Alex finally return's to the living.

Pete is in the kitchen, trying to make a decent cup of coffee when Jon sit's down at the table with Ryan.

"So, Walker, heard you and Cassie are together now." Gabe says, attempting to relive the sort of conversation's that they would have before the luno's. Pete freezes, his back turned to them. That can't be true, he knows that the two of them sleep next to each other at night but they're not together.

"I guess so...yeah." Jon replies, obviously not wanting to get too much into it. That's when Pete turn's around.

"You are?" Pete question's, worn coffee filter fit in his hand. He's eyeing Jon, Ryan and Gabe are looking at him with slight surprise because Pete was just on this side of loud. Jon's face falters and he looks down at the table.

"Well, we talked last night and I told her I loved her and so I'm sure we are." The younger boy tells him. He looks back up, warm brown eyes meeting the older boy's, Jon's face soft and blank. Pete doesn't say anything to Jon, just put's the filter on the kitchen table and heads out of the room.

He strides quick through the house, intent on finding Cassie. He finds her in the bunk room with Krissy, talking with the girl and smiling, a thick anger seethes through Pete's body. "Cassie, can I talk to you?" Pete asks as he comes to stand next to the bunk that the two girls are sitting on.

The girl's look up at him and Cassie is watching him intently before she nods. "Sure Pete." She says, her tone just on this side of confused. She's sitting back and looking at him expectantly. Pete's gaze drifts to Krissy's face.

"Do you think I can have a moment alone with her?" He asks maybe a bit too harsh but Krissy nods and stands, glancing at Cassie before leaving the room. Pete sit's down across from her as opposed to sitting next to her. She's staring at him with questioning eyes. He's sure it's probably obvious that he's not in the greatest mood.

"What's up Pete?" Her voice is easy, much lighter than it's been lately.

"What do you think you're doing?" Pete asks, his voice is blunt as he crosses his arms and is staring at her. The girl's face fall's blank, her blue eyes searching his.

"What do you mean?" Confusion laces her voice. Pete is not good at hiding his emotions or sugarcoating things.

"You're with Jon now?" He asks point blank. Cassie's face is still blank but her eyes hold surprise, her hands tightening into the fabric of her jeans. She's silent and Pete sighs. "Are you?" He asks again, his voice has dropped but still hold's a note of seriousness. The dark haired girl scowls and she leans back, mimicing Pete's position, her own arms across her chest.

"So, what if I am?" She her voice is flat, devoid of anger at the moment but he knows that the girl is good at pulling off silent rage. Pete rolls his eyes.

"So? So, what about Patrick?" The boy growls out. Cassie is looking at him with wide eyes now, he knows that she's getting angier by the second.

"What about Patrick?" Her voice is strained, she's trying hard to be calm. Pete uncrosses his arms and practically glares at the girl.

"So, now that he's dead you think it's perfectly fine to go fuck Jon?" Pete seethes, Cassie is up in a flash, standing, mouth tight.

"Pete, it is no business of your's who I decide to do what with." Her voice is rumbling with tight anger. Pete knows he's probably going too far but he doesn't give a damn. Patrick was his best friend, he doesn't deserve this.

"How could you do this to him?"

"Do this to him? Do you even realize how insane you sound?" She scoff's, Pete stands up and they're level with each other.

"He's dead Cassie!" The boy snap's at her, his hands balling into fist's.

"Exactly Pete! He's dead. I don't think he gives a shit what I do." Cassie shout's back and someone else will probably hear. Someone will probably come in and break them up.

"Are you really that much of a slut that once Patrick's dead you had to go and fuck the first guy who showed interest in you? He hasn't even been dead a year!" Pete is yelling at her. Cassie looks apalled, her eyes are shining and she draws her hand back quick, strikes him hard across the cheek.

"How dare you say that to me Pete! How dare you!" The girl screeches at him. She's livid and Pete can hear footsteps coming into the room. "You think I don't know that he's dead? He-He's not even dead anymore! You know what happened and you think I don't get that? I know he's gone, and the Patrick I knew is not coming back! I fucking get that Pete!" Her eyes water but she shakes her head like she's not allowing herself to cry.

"But do you really think I should just be alone forever? Just live in the shadow of his memory all alone and never allow myself to be happy?" Her voice drops low at that last part, a tear breaking free and slipping down her cheek.

"I do it!" Pete shout's back, he's breathing heavy but he's just so angry. Angry at Cassie because he believes she's forsaken Patrick, that she's trying to replace him and forget all about him. He's mad at the fact that she can do it, that Patrick is so easy to forget to his widow. He had been so angry that he didn't even realize that he had brought the conversation back around to himself.

"What?...What's going on in here?" It's Ryan, Jon and Gabe standing behind him. Pete's still standing, glaring at the girl and his fists are balled up, tight at his side.

"Are you two fighting?" Jon asks and Pete blows them off.

"If I have to live alone, keeping my wife's memory alive!...then so do you!" Pete seethes, his mouth twisted into a bitter grimace and his voice slightly broken.

"But you don't have to...do you really think Ashlee would want you to spend every day of your life remembering that you're all alone? That she isn't with you? That's no way to live." Cassie tells him, her voice is softer now, maybe pity but no, Pete's not letting this go back on him.

"Patrick loved you more than anyone else, loved you more than anything I've ever seen. And this is how you honor his memory? By sleeping with someone new?" Pete snaps at her. The footsteps again and it's Jon. He's brushing past Pete, knocking into him just so the older boy stumbles a bit. Jon is reaching out, placing his hand on Cassie's shoulder.

"Come on," He starts, his head motioning to the other boys in the room. "You don't have to listen to this." Jon tells her, more than ready to start his new role as her protector. She nods her dark head and makes a move to follow her new lover. Pete just scoffs.

"Yeah, have her while you can Jon." Pete hisses, his voice absolutely filled with venom. He's turning to eye them when they pass him by. Jon ignores Pete and keep's moving. "God knows that once you die she'll move on to someone else." He add's and that seem's to get through to the younger boy, break past a barrier and now Jon stop's. He's turning slowly but Cassie is faster and she whips around, breathing heavy.

"Don't you fucking say that!" She screams at him, Pete hasn't seen her this worked up in awhile. He knows he's being an asshole, that this is really the last thing Patrick would want but he can't stop himself. He's never really had good self control.

"It's the truth!" The boy yell's. "Who will it be after Jon, Cassie? Hmm? Ryan maybe? Or Gabe? Or hey, Alex just lost Nate why don't you see if he's available." Pete says cruely. Cassie is furious and shaking and tears are leaking from her eyes.

Pete doesn't even see when Jon moves forward and decks him hard in the face. He's apparently quicker than Pete thought.
*
Ryan call's down Joe and Andy to help talk Pete down. It's times like this that he really misses having Patrick around, Patrick could always talk Pete down quickly. Pete's breathing heavy with a nice darkening bruise decorating his tanned jaw. Ryan is sitting there across from him and explaining what went down to Joe and Andy, even though the shouting match was loud enough for half of the house to hear. Pete had to sit there and listen to what an ass he is while his jaw is aching.

He get's the fact that he shouldn't have said what he did to her. It was over the line but he was just fucked up enough to always say what he knew would hurt the person most, to strike big in the beginning. Patrick would hate him if he was here and now he's sure that both Jon and Cassie will never speak to him again. Though he could get lucky and maybe she'll forgive him, she seems likely but Jon...not so much.

Pete couldn't help it, thinking of Patrick had brought him around to thinking about his own life, what had happened to him and how he cannot move on.

Ashlee had been Pete's wife of three months when all the luno shit went down. Three months of marriage and one month of pregnancy. He'd been in love too and he'd lost just as much, no, more than Cassie did, more than any of them did. He lost his wife and his child. But there was no grave for her, no grave for Ashlee because he didn't even get to say goodbye.

The luno's had taken her, one moment she was there and the next the luno's had grabbed her and she was gone. Pete doesn't even know if she's really dead, he ignores the fact that luno's basically love the way girl's taste...and children. It breaks his heart to think about it, to even bring it into his mind. So, he doesn't, he pushes it all away and cope's, just survives everyday.

He feels like he can't go on, he can never have another girl, not another wife, not another child. It was them and that was his moment, now it's over and nothing Cassie says can change his mind.
*
"Are you okay now?" Jon asks Cassie as they sit in the upstairs attic, next to the room where Alex usually sleep's. They're seated on small crates, Cassie wiping away tears and nodding her head.

"Yeah, I'm-I'm just shocked that he said those things to me." She says softly, her voice is tearstained and Jon is still royally pissed off at the older boy. He more than anyone knows about what it's like to lose someone, so, why berate your supposed best friend's widow? It was a dick move one hundered percent.

"Want me to kick his ass?" Jon jokes, his hand slipping to her face and his fingers pressing under her chin, tilting her head up so their eyes would meet. She smiles and shakes her head. Cassie sniff's and wipes at her eyes. "Do you regret it?" Jon finds himself asking moment's later, his voice hesitant as he stares into his girl's eyes.

"Regret what?" She questions, Jon's hands slide to her knees, resting there softly and she brings her own hands down to rest over his.

"Deciding to be with me." The man says, his dark brown eyes searching her's. Cassie looks taken aback before she quickly shakes her head.

"No." She starts, her hands slip away from his and move to cup his face, her thumbs tracing gentle patterns against his skin.

"Do you love me?" Jon asks, her hands still on his face. He told her that he loved her the night they had made love but she never said it back, it had all happened too quickly for her to say it back, at least that's what he had told himself. Jon did love her, he cared about her. In the old world he wouldn't dare rush her so soon after Patrick's death but this world was just screwed up enough that old social rules didn't apply. But no matter how much he cared, he wasn't looking to just be someone's rebound, to just take the place of Patrick.

Cassie was staring at him again, soft searching blue eyes. She sighs deep and Jon is taking that as a no. "I shouldn't have said anything." Jon starts and he attempts to pull away from her warm hands.

"No, Jon, wait." She says, her hands slip from his face but they wrap around his wrist's, keeping him with her. "It's-it's something that's hard for me to say. I do care about you, a lot but I still love Patrick." She says to him, her thumbs rubbing small circles around his wrists. "It's something that I've only ever said to him." Jon can't pretend those words don't sting.

"Cassie." Jon starts but The girl cuts him off.

"But I wanna say it. I do, but not because you said it to me. I wanna say it because I mean it so, do you think you could give me just a little time to say it?" Cassie says to him, she's leaning in close and she's so serious, so earnest that Jon can't help but stay.

"Time's not something we have a lot of exactly." Jon states and Cassie's eyes flicker. She leans in close, standing and leaning over so their mouth's are close. Cassie leans in and kisses him, quick press of their lips. Jon wraps his hands around her waist and lowers her down so that she curled in his lap, her face pressed to the crook of his neck.

"We will if I have anything to say about it." She mumbles against his neck. Jon lock's his arms around her and they stay like that, sharing heartbeat's in the silence.


Entry eighteen: You've Got That Seed In You

Brendon had been turned on ever since the day Cassie and Jon had had sex. Krissy thinks that it's because of the fact that for Brendon, it was like porn. He could hear it and he could smell it but you know, he couldn't see it and he wasn't having it so, maybe it was a little frustrating. It's only natural that he grabbed up Krissy and kissed her with a little more urgency than usual. They didn't do it in the house so, instead Brendon took her in the backseat of the broken down van, pressing her down into the worn seat's but she didn't care.

Krissy knew full well that this was the luno part of him coming out, it happened sometimes. It made him a little rougher and she could see the glint of his teeth a little better but he always kept himself in control, never lost it to the point where he would actually hurt her or god forbid, bite her.

afterwards they lay pressed together on the long stretch of seat. Brendon spooning behind Krissy, his arms wrapped around her tight and posessive. The girl tries not to think about the things that had happened on this seat, how people who've been injured, dying were layed stretched out on the same seat as them.

"Do you think we made a mistake putting those two together?" Brendon asks from behind Krissy, his nose nuzzling at her pale neck, he likes how she smells like him now, or at least that's what he tells her.

"Um, Bren, try filling me in on what you're thinking about before you ask question's." She replies to him, sometimes Brendon get's too wrapped up in his own head.

"Jon and Cassie. Do you think we fucked up by pushing it?" He's asking her but she's not sure why. She knows what Pete did and how hurt Cassie and Jon had been by that so maybe that's what he's thinking about.

"I really don't."

"What if they're not ready?" Brendon questions, but he's always been that way, a near constant romantic..maybe more before he changed then after. Krissy turn's into him, her hands pressing to his neck and their eyes locking.

"Everything I told Cassie, I meant and I would've said them regardless of if we tried to get them together or not. I said it because I could see Jon was in love with her and I know that she could feel the same if she tried. And we both know that with everything shitty in this world, that love is the only good thing left. They both deserve it so, we just gave them a push."

"It's cute that you're worried." Krissy add's soft and she kisses Brendon. Her boyfriend shrugs.

"I don't want it to all blow up in our faces, I want them to be happy." He tells her, resting his face in the crook of her neck. Krissy runs fingers through his hair, she can feel his warm breath tickling against her skin. Brendon doesn't show his soft side as often anymore and if he does it's only ever to her.

"They will be." She replies, mostly to soothe Brendon. She doesn't know if the two of them will be happy and she doesn't know if she should be the one dispensing relationship advice when she has her own fear's with Brendon.
*
Later Krissy is in the kitchen, making dinner because none of them has had a decent meal in week's due to the outlet store fiasco but now that William and Greta run it, they've got their supplies back. She's making stew because that's all they can really make, it's easy, water, meat, vegetables. That's it. She also thinks that maybe she should teach someone else to cook. Jon does pretty well, Cassie kind of suck's at it and the rest of the guys can do it but just barely. It's not a big surprise that she settles on Greta.

So, the other blonde girl in the house stands by Krissy as they chop vegetables and throw them into the pot on the rundown stove. "Stew again?" Joe mumbles as he passes through the kitchen.

"Beggers can't be choosers." Krissy retort's and Greta laughs.

"So," Greta starts, she bump's her hip against Krissy's as she dumps her own veggies into the pot. "Maybe you should fill me in on the people here. Their stories you know?" The blonde girl asks, looking at Krissy with hopeful eyes and a coy smile.

"Well." The taller girl says, surveying the shorter girl. "I can tell you about Brendon and I because that's the only story that's mine to tell. Everyone else, well, I guess you'll have to ask them." Krissy see's the slight look of panic on the girl's face. "Or not." She add's, she thinks if she didn't know these other people so well she might not want to ask them about their pasts either.

"Okay, so, you and Brendon. Spill please." Greta asks, her light voice spilling around the room as she cuts off thin slices of meat and puts them in the pot. Krissy smiles, glad for a moment to relive her time with Brendon back when they were both stupid kid's and he asked her out in the parking lot of their high school while Ryan, Spencer, Cassie, and Jenny looked on.

She tells Greta about how they dated through their senior year of high school, how they went to the same college, moved into a small place together, contemplated getting a dog and argued over the names. Brendon wanted Jasmine and Krissy was vying for Chuck.

Krissy makes a rash decision to tell Greta about how Brendon got bit, about how he's not exactly all human. She tells her vaugely of Brendon being part luno now. Greta looks surprised than scared. It's a reaction that honestly Krissy expected. She knows that with all the luno's do it can be too hard to accept that someone you know shares trait's with them, it wasn't exactly easy for Krissy in the beginning either.

"Is he..alright now?" Greta asks, voice filled with concern but Krissy's kind of looking for more of an elaboration than that and she guesses her face shows that because Greta continues. "I mean, he doesn't feed does he?" The girl asks, worry evident in her voice. Krissy's quiet for a moment, thinking back to a conversation she and Brendon had had in the shower a few days ago, his fear's that someday more traits would surface, how one day he just might want to feed on people.

Greta is still watching her so Krissy shakes her head quickly. "He wouldn't be here if he did. We wouldn't let him and he wouldn't allow himself to be." She knows Brendon, she knows that if those feelings ever truly arose, if they became more than sweat inducing dreams, that he wouldn't put any of them in danger, not for a second.

Greta seems satisfied in Krissy's anwser so the two of them go back to cooking, idle chatting now and maybe the new girl finally learned to not ask questions about the people in this house, learning that sometimes you won't like the anwsers.
*
William is pressed to the paper thin wall that seperates the bunk room from the kitchen. He had just been about to go in and see Greta, to keep her company but he had heard her talking with that Krissy girl and the topic had spun around to Krissy's assumed lover Brendon. William had been still and silent as he listened to the conversation. Heard the girl say that Brendon had been bitten in the past, that Brendon was one of those half-breeds.

He had suspected that something was different about Brendon, had noticed it the first time they met. Maybe it was the way the boy's eyes had looked so exceedingly dark, yet seemed to shine extra bright at the same time. Maybe it had been the way the boy carried himself, tight and coiled and protected. It had put William off but he ignored it, he did have the tendancy to get overly paranoid. But now he was right and Brendon was dangerous, dangerous to everyone here.

William is again about to go into the kitchen when the backdoor opens and he can see Brendon himself entering the kitchen. The boy looks human enough but again those eyes, sparkling inhumanly. Brendon stands there and inhales deeply, smelling the cooking food before he turns to look at the girl's a smirk on his face. "You cooking stew Kris?" He asks his girlfriend and William see's her nod and smile at him, how can she be with someone like him? He'll never understand it. "Good, I'm starved." He says and William narrows his brown eyes.

"How's fixing that van going Bren?" Krissy asks not looking at her boyfriend but stiring up the things in the pot. Brendon sighs.

"You know how Joe gets all bitchy when he's hungry...or misses weed." Brendon jokes and both girl's laugh.

"Your face is all dirty." Krissy points out and Brendon grins, wide, grease marks streaking his cheeks and chin. William thinks he catches a glimpse of sharp teeth, not human teeth, definitly not.

"Oh really?" Brendon starts and he moves behind Krissy grabbing her around the waist and pulling her back, his face nuzzling her neck as Greta looks on. "Guess I'll just have to get you dirty too." He states. Why isn't she afraid? William doesn't understand it, his mouth so close to her neck. He could take both of them out in second's. That thought makes a ball of anger and dred mix in William's stomach. What if they're all like that? Luno's in hiding? What if this is all a trap to take down William and Greta?

"Greta, get away from him!" William yells, springing out from behind the wall, gun out of it's hiding place and aimed squarely at Brendon's chest. All three people in the room had turned, two set's of wide eyes and a very calm looking half-breed.

"William! What are you doing?" Greta shout's, alarm in her feather soft voice. William barely looks at her.

"You heard it's girlfriend. It is a half-breed...he's...it's dangerous." William seethes, his eyes locked with Brendon's. Krissy who had been previously standing behind her boyfriend walks out in front of him scowling.

"Get that gun away from my boyfriend." She demands, voice calm and level but still firm with anger. William ignores her request. Instead glancing over at Greta.

"Get away from him Greta, you're easy prey!" William demand's and Greta crosses her arms over her chest.

"You're overreacting William." She insists but he shakes his head.

"No, I bet that's their ploy. Go and pick people up, bring them back here and then bam! We're all luno chow."

"Look, William." Brendon begins, speaking for the first time since the other boy pulled the gun. "It's true that I was bitten but I also got the antidote in time. I'm still human, I've never hurt another human and I don't intend to start." Brendon insists and Krissy is staring at him with worry in her eyes.

"I don't believe you. Luno's lie all the time, lie to get whatever they want." William argues, his voice frim and his hand shaking slightly. He doesn't paticularly like killing people, not really but he will to survive. Fight or flight as they say and when it comes down to it William always fight's.

"I would never hurt anyone." Brendon says smoothly but William shakes his head.

"That's what they all say.."

"I wouldn't William. I wouldn't be here if it put anyone at risk." Brendon is saying. William is reminded of a situation very similar to this, how he believed these lines once before and it was a terrible mistake.

"You don't know what you're capable of..you don't know if you'll change! What if you do? What happen's when you kill your girl or one of these other people you care about? Can you live with yourself then?" William hisses and for the first time since they've been talking Brendon seem's shaken. "Even half-breeds can change..they all do eventually." William half whispers.

"Shut up! Just shut the fuck up right now!" Krissy is screaming, taking two steps forward and standing right in front of Brendon, almost like a shield for the boy. "You're an asshole who doesn't know what he's talking about!" The girl add's. "Brendon's still the same! He hasn't changed and he isn't going to! Not now and not ever so, just take your paranoid ass somewhere else!" Krissy seethes, really, this is an anger that William didn't think was possible in the girl.

Other footsteps echo around the house and in moments Joe and that girl that William held hostage that day at the outlet are downstairs, along with that girl's rather buff looking boyfriend and the doctor Andy. That scrawny dude that William thinks is named Ryan's there too, they're all downstairs, staring at the scene in the kitchen.

"Brendon what's going on?" Ryan is asking.

"I, nothing Ry." Brendon says quiet, his previous confidence lessened but not gone.

"I found out about the little secret you've all been hiding." William tells the group, his eyes darting between Ryan and Brendon. "I found out that you're harboring a half-breed." William's voice is malicious, a kind of hate that Brendon did nothing to incure.

"Don't call him that!" Krissy hisses through gritted teeth.

"William, Brendon is our friend. He would never hurt us. He's proven that many times over." Andy is saying because Ryan is busy looking at William like he wants him to burst into flames or something equally as painful. William laughs, a laugh of disbelief and maybe pity.

"None of you know what they're capable of. Take it from someone whose dealt with a one before. When it happen's, it won't matter who you are, how long you've been friend's. He'll kill each and every one of you." William tells them, voice dark and Krissy looks pissed again, Brendon looks even more shaken then before.

"Just put the gun down man, we can all talk this shit out. There's not a need for violence." That buff looking guy is telling him, his hands up in an 'Easy does it' kind of fashion.

William can see that nothing he's saying is really getting through to these idiot's. There is a slight chance, just the slightest that he's judged this situation all wrong and that not every half-breed wind's up like Tom did, maybe there are differences? Either way he feels like he's gone too far to go back now. These people seem forgiving enough but he's tried to go after one of their own, how will they possibly forgive that?

William doesn't know if he'll ever be forgiven but he does know that he shouldn't be there right now. He slips his gun back into the waistband of his jeans before he sighs and in a flash he's striding through the kitchen and out the backdoor, out into the night. He doesn't care, let any of the luno's try and fuck with him. He'll fight because he always does.

"William! Where are you going?" Greta call's out to him, she's dashing out into the front yard, trying to follow him. He stop's and turns back.

"Don't follow me Greta!" He says maybe too coldly but it doesn't matter, he'll apologize later.

"But! Where are you going?" She tries again, taking a few steps closer.

"I'll come back for you." He tells her and he's gone, walking into the night, into danger and Krissy goes outside, takes her arm and brings her back in, they ignore the tear's on both their faces.
*
They all eat dinner in silence, Cassie talking quietly with Krissy and Greta in the kitchen. The others spread around the house all in various degrees of conversation. They try to ignore it but there is a definite degree of tension in the house. A secret fear that maybe got unleashed before it should have. In truth Krissy has been worried about Brendon gaining more and more luno traits ever since their conversation in the bathroom. Maybe Brendon's been worried about it longer.

"He'll be okay you know?" Cassie tells her during dinner and Krissy nods but doesn't bother looking up at her friend. Cassie's known for trying to say what people want to hear, It's an endearing quality at times. "I'm not just saying it either. Gabe and I read about it before, people who get changed don't always go full blown luno. It's different for everyone, like the antidote and how that's different too." Cassie insists and maybe Krissy can believe that, or at least force herself to believe it because she can't, she can't be in a world with no Brendon.

That may be selfish of her considering that some of her closest friend's have lost those most important to them and went on living but maybe Krissy isn't as strong as them.

"I'm sorry he did that." Greta starts, she looks pained, like she's the one whose boyfriend is part luno. "It's just..he's like that because of what happened to him before..." Greta stops even though both girl's are eyeing her curiously. "I'm sorry, it's not my story to tell." She add's and Krissy knows what she mean's. Some stories, some subjects aren't meant to be told or talked about.

Again a small silence as they actually eat. Greta stopping and looking at Cassie. "That's a beautiful ring." She tells the dark haired girl. Her eyes locked on on Cassie's wedding ring.

"Oh. Thank you." Cassie sounds surprised, like she's forgotten that she was even wearing the ring, or maybe she forgot what it was like for people to notice. Greta smiles.

"Is that guy, Jon, is he your husband?" Greta asks, obviously trying to change the subject, bring it around to a happy topic but the girl couldn't be further from a happy topic if she tried. Krissy almost want's to do a facepalm.

"Um, no." Cassie starts, her eyes are unfocused but she's gazing at her ring, with the slightest of sad smiles. "I was married to a boy named Patrick." Krissy really hopes that Greta catches the word 'was'. She does seem to get it though because she's frowning.

"God, god, I am so sorry. I shouldn't even ask people questions anymore. William always says that I'm too curious for my own damn good...I guess he's right. I'm sorry." She rambles out at Cassie but the dark haired girl shakes her head and her gaze lock's with Krissy, the two of them exchanging something like a silent conversation that Greta only really get's half of.

"It's okay." Cassie tells her but Krissy feels like the girl is telling herself that more than anyone else. Like she said before, some stories aren't meant to be retold.


Entry nineteen: I've Got Troubled Thoughts And Self-Esteem To Match

The next Night William doesn't come back and Greta starts staring out the window a lot, seemingly waiting for him to return, because he promised to come back to her. He wouldn't leave her all alone would he? It's not that she doesn't feel comfortable here. She does, the people are nice, Cassie and Krissy helping to make her feel welcome even though she has a bad tendency to ask stupid question's at times. It's that by now she only really feels safe with William, maybe because she's been with him all this time.

The girl felt the same way with Bob, only felt safe around him. Up until the day that he suddenly wasn't safe anymore and William saved her and hurt her deeper than she had ever been. She trust's William but at the same time she doesn't know him that well, desperate times make's for strange bedfellows and all that.

Greta just want's William to come back, because he promised that he would.
*
Alex is upstairs with Cassie and Gabe. He still has a habit of hanging around upstairs because that's what he did when he was with Nate, the two of them hanging out in the upper room, staring out at the land that surround's them. They're going about business as usual. Cassie and Gabe writing information out in those ragged notebook's and Alex curled up next to the window, next to where Nate's shitty makeshift urn sit's on the windowsill, he's reading the rag. It's not nearly as enjoyable as it would be if Nate were still around.

Alex hears the fax machine running and he looks up, eyeing Gabe bent over it, sending something out. "What are you sending now?" He's asking, it's sorta his job to keep track of what get's sent out. Cassie's the one who anwsers him.

"We're asking about people who've been bitten and got the antidote in time. People like Brendon." She explain's to him, her soft blue eyes. Alex would ask why but he can sort of figure it out on his own. Ever since what happened between William and Brendon the other day the boy had been worried, has been asking for information. Alex would probably ask about it anyway except he just notices something about Cassie.

"You're not wearing your wedding ring." He points out. For as long as he's known her she's worn that ring, never taken it off not once and now, it's just gone. Cassie looks down at her ring finger, a white mark in the shape of the ring around the skin.

"Yeah." Cassie says as she looks up at him. "I uh, took it off." She admits and her voice is soft, maybe a little guilty.

"Why?" Alex asks, her ring is the last thing she has of Patrick, why would she take it off?

"I still wear it." Cassie tells him, her hand slipping to her neck, lifting a delicate silver chain away from her pale skin and showing the boy the wedding ring hanging off the end of said chain. "I just wear it on my neck now." She add's and she's smiling. For some reason Alex doesn't feel much like smiling. For some reason he was looking up to Cassie as the way a widow should act, loyal to her husband and even though he and Nate weren't married, he still wanted to follow her lead. But this, this meant that she was done being loyal and that she was moving on.

"Because of Jon?" Alex asks, his gaze flickering to the little urn on the windowsill. Cassie shakes her head, remaining calm. She knows he isn't asking it in the same way Pete was, not full of disapproval and insult's.

"Because I don't want Patrick's memory on my hand but next to my heart." She explain's. Alex opens his mouth to say something but Gabe interrupt's the two of them.

"Cassie, want me to send that thing we were talking about?" The tall boy asks, he's leaning over the fax machine once again, looking like he could go either way. Alex thinks he just asked so another awkward conversation wouldn't have time to start. Cassie nods and Alex looks between them.

"What thing?" The other two are silent as they glance at each other, neither anwsering Alex. The boy scowls, he's not a child and if these two are starting to keep things from him because they don't think he can handle it, well, then they can find themselves a new record keeper. "I can handle it." Alex tells them, his voice weak.

"It's-" Cassie starts but Gabe cuts her off.

"It's a fax asking if anyone's seen the luno versions of Patrick and Jenny." Gabe inform's him, his voice tight and he's staring down at the machine. So, he kind of feels like an ass because they were just trying to spare his feelings and maybe Cassie's as well.

"Oh." Alex replies, he looks down at the rag again. Luno's are something he doesn't like to talk about, not since Nate. But that topic, the creatures that roam around them, it's pratically unavoidable. He looks back up at Cassie. "What happens if we find them?" He's asking the question more to her than to Gabe but it doesn't look like the other boy even has an anwser prepared. Cassie's staring at him with deep searching eyes.

"Honestly," She starts. "I just don't know."
*
Ryan is standing downstairs with Pete, they're supposed to be figuring out how to help get the van fixed but really all their doing is brooding in silence. Ryan isn't so much as brooding as he is lost is thought. Cassie had come up to him much earlier that day and asked his permission about asking around the other hideout's for information about Jenny. He doesn't actually believe she need's his permission because they were friends before he and Jenny were lovers, the act is more of a formality.

He agreed to let her seek out information but neither of them talked about what to do if any information is found. It's something he knows they should talk about but they're not. Ryan thinks it's because they both know what they should do if they happen to find Jenny and Patrick in luno form. They know but that doesn't mean they'll do it.

Pete on the other hand is brooding because Cassie and Jon have both taken to giving him the cold shoulder, acting like the older boy doesn't even exist. Ryan doesn't blame them, not for a second. It's clear just who happens to be in the wrong here but Pete's just too damn proud to bother apologizing.

"Hey, Ryan," Pete starts and he looks across the table at the younger boy.

"Hmm?" The younger boy responds, only half listening to Pete.

"Do you think you could go and get me the newest issue of the rag?" Pete asks, his tanned fingers drumming against the table. It's his left hand Ryan notes, he knows that Pete still can't really control much of his right hand, not detailed movements at least. Ryan glances up at Pete, a blank look on his face.

"Can't you get it yourself?" Pete's not helpless but Ryan also knows who happen's to be upstairs with Alex and Gabe. Pete makes a face and huff's.

"Forget it. I guess I'll just wait for them to fall asleep or something." Pete mutter's and again silence falls over them. Ryan rolls his eyes and crosses his arms.

"Pete, look, don't you think you're being kind of ridiculous? I mean we're not children, we're not even teenagers anymore. This kind of shit might've been okay back before this all went down but it's not okay now." Ryan states, an edge to his voice. Pete open's his mouth to say something but the younger boy shakes his head and continues.

"We're all a team. We all need each other Pete and if we're fighting...it's dangerous you know? We've got to remember that these people in this house, our friend's, they're all we have." Ryan is being firm, with Pete, it's the only way to really get through to him. Not a lot of people can get through to Pete these days, Patrick and Ashlee being the only one's who could ever really do so.

Pete is glaring at the table but Ryan thinks that maybe something got through to him because he's standing and nodding, shuffling away to find the people he owes apologies to.
*
Pete thinks he could apologize to Cassie, he knows where she is, that she's upstairs with Gabe and Alex but at the same time he doesn't think he's going to go to the girl. He heads outside into the darkness moving to the small attached garage like room. That's where Andy and Joe are working on the van. That's where Patrick used to come to make stuff to help them and Pete would just come and stand next to him, watch as his best friend worked.

The room was big and open, with cement floor's and little shelves of half finished gadget's that Pete didn't really know the purpose for. They had the van jacked up and the hood open, holes still plauging the sides of the vechical. Andy was fiddling around under the hood while Pete could see leg's that he thought belonged to Joe under the van and there was Jon, leaning against one of the counter's and rifling through the tool's that Andy and Joe would need.

They all knew very little about cars so almost everything was done in the 'Wing it and hope for the best' style.

Pete knows that Jon is staring at him and he almost, almost turn's and leaves the room but maybe in this situation Jon is the less scary of the two people that he pissed off. "You and Ryan think of something to contribute?" Andy asks, wiping his grease stained hands on the already stained shirt he was wearing, the same shirt he wear's when he attempts to fix things. He has an injury shirt too, that one being far more gruesome than the fixing things shirt.

Pete shakes his head, keeping his eyes to the floor, he can feel Jon staring at him and he kind of forget's about how scary the younger boy can be. Andy mumbles something and goes back to the van while Pete can hear Joe swearing softly from under the vechical. The oldest of the men takes a deep breath and looks up at Jon.

"Hey, Walker, you uh-think I could talk to you for a minute?" Pete asks, tilting his head towards the side door, there's not really a need for the door on the side because the whole front where a wall would normally be is wide open. It would be more dangerous if luno's dared to venture close to hideout's.

Jon eyes him for a few silent beats and Pete is expecting a 'no', he is expecting Jon to tell him to fuck off. He's not expecting the small nod and the younger boy walking toward's him.

They end up outside, standing in between the open garage and the wooden paneled house with it's various lights on. Pete is looking at the ground, kicking at the dirt with his shoe while Jon is standing by, waiting for the older boy to start talking. "Well?" Jon asks moments later and Pete looks up.

"I'm sorry." He manages to get it out. Part of him still feels like he shouldn't have to apologize, that he wasn't all that wrong but he knows that he shouldn't have implied that Jon would die, that he shouldn't have called Cassie a slut. Jon nods but he doesn't look like he's forgiven Pete. "I know I was out of line. I mean, I get that I shouldn't have said that shit." Pete starts, Jon's just watching him with deep brown eyes, waiting to hear what Pete's got to say.

"But lets be honest, I'm not the greatest person around, it's hard for people to really get me. I'm clingy, I'm messed up and Patrick...he got me. It wasn't hard and I had someone who understood me. I vauled Patrick so much, held him so high. I just wanted him to be happy and with Cassie he was. I know he loved her so much, more than he loved anyone else." Pete rambles out. Jon shift's, maybe uncomfortable with Pete's words.

"I get that. I knew them too you know." Jon states, his voice is oddly blank, Pete want's to think it's the first step to forgiving. "But Pete, I don't think I'm the one you should be apologizing to." Jon add's and Pete's heart drops because he knows, he already knows that he's apologizing to the wrong person.

"It's her life to live whatever way she want's. I know that she'll always love Patrick, I don't want her to forget him because he made her happy and happiness is something hard to come by nowadays. But I want to make her happy too and keep her safe. I want to be with her and she want's to be with me so that's what we're doing, Pete." Jon tells him. He sound's so sure, so honest that it make's Pete long to feel the same way about someone, the same way he felt about Ashlee.

Pete doesn't think he really get's it. Why should it be Jon's job to keep Cassie safe? It's something Jon's been doing ever since Patrick died, something that Pete found odd. "Why are you so determined to be her protector?" Pete question's, he keep's his voice flat, not wanting to start a whole new argument. Jon's eyes spark but he anwsers without missing a beat.

"Because Patrick asked me to."

"What?" Pete asks, Jon looks taken aback. He thought Pete knew about it, about the fact of the promise that Jon had made to Patrick in regards to Cassie.

"I thought you knew." Jon says and Pete shakes his head.

"Tell me." Pete insist's and to the boy's surprise, Jon does. He tells Pete all about how Patrick came to him shortly after they moved into the hideout. How Patrick asked Jon to promise to take care of Cassie. Jon maybe leaves out the part where Patrick said that he didn't trust Pete with the task, he doesn't need that weighing on Pete's mind.

Pete sighs and afterwards feels like a douchebag. All this time he just assumed that Jon was waiting for the first moment to make his move on Cassie but in reality he was just keeping a promise, a promise that led him to falling in love with her. "I'm sorry." Pete apologizes again but he's not sure Jon get's exactly what he's apologizing for. Jon nods all the same and clap's Pete on the shoulder.

"It's okay, I forgive you." He tells him, Jon looks like he wants to say more but Pete talk's before he can.

"I know, I need to apologize to her." Pete tells him and Jon smirks and nods. "Maybe, put in a good word for me?" He add's and Jon allows himself a little laugh.

Jon goes back to the garage and Pete heads inside to find Cassie and apologize to her. Ryan is eyeing him but Pete ignores him and instead heads up the creaky set of stairs to find the girl who was probably still working with Gabe. He does find her upstairs, scribbling quietly in the beaten up notebook. Alex wasn't in the room and neither was Gabe, Pete just assumes that Cassie was avoiding him.

She looks up at his footsteps and frown's before looking back down without saying a word. "Cassie, I wanted to talk to you." Pete starts and Cassie keeps writing for a few seconds before she set's her pen down and looks up at him with a slight sigh.

"Then talk." Her voice is cold, colder than he's used to. Pete nods and shuffles closer.

"Listen, I just wanted to say that I'm-"

Suddenly the fax machine starts beeping loudly in the room. Cassie jerk's up and is moving over to it, awaiting the arrival of the paper from the machine. They only ever get faxes from other hideout's, other places human's live. And usually they only get faxes if they have anwsers to questions or new's, or just plain info.

Pete wait's for Cassie to be done before he tries talking again. The paper emits and Cassie grab's it out, scan's it quickly and gasps. "What is it?" Pete is asking and despite the fact that they're fighting he moves closer to her and Cassie anwsers him.

"Someone's seen them..." She mutters out.

"Who?" Pete question's softly.

"Patrick and Jenny." Cassie replies with shaking hands.




Entry twenty: Second Chances Won't Leave You Alone

Cassie stands there for a split second before she rushes down the stairs, fax in hand and she's calling for Ryan, for Gabe, for anyone who will listen. She wind's up in the kitchen, Ryan standing and looking worried. Brendon and Krissy rounding the corner of the bunkroom as they too stop and watch the girl with slightly alarmed eyes. Pete comes thumping down the stairs a few moment's after Cassie did, stopping and hanging back to look at the group.

"What's wrong?" Ryan asks and Gabe is there and he's looking at the paper clutched tight in her hand. His brown eyes widen.

"Did someone respond?" He asks and she nods. Gabe slides over to where she is and lifts the paper from her, his own eyes scanning the information. He stop's after a moment and sighs out. "Jesus."

"Okay, someone better tell me what's going on right now."Ryan demand's, a small frown on his girlish face and Cassie lock's eyes with him.

"It's them Ryan, someone's seen them." Cassie's voice is in awe, no other explanation for it. Now it's Ryan's dark eyes that widen. He doesn't need more of an explanation then that. He knows exactly what she's talking about and he's reaching for the paper with shaky hands.

"Who?" Krissy prompt's from behind Cassie, the shorter girl turn's, her eyes locking with Krissy's. "Jenny...and Patrick. Someone's seen them around." The girl tells them and both Brendon and Krissy looked surprised. Cassie's shaking but that's to be expected. There really is no way to get used to someone whose dead to suddenly come back, there's just no way.

The fax was from a guy named Mikey Way. It was pretty simple actually, it said that they were in a hideout located about an half an hour away from where their hideout was, that this Mikey person's crew had been involved in a luno fight about a week and a half ago and that he's pretty sure that he saw at least one of them there, hiding out in the background and that they left before they could get hurt.

"So, what do we do?" Ryan is asking and Cassie is looking at the floor, her body still visibly shaking. Krissy reaches out automatically and hug's the older girl. This whole situation is very difficult to sort out. No one really knows how to feel, if they should be devestated that their friends are now luno's or allow themselves just the tiniest bit of happiness at the fact that their friends are alive again.

"The luno attack happened nearly two week's ago. The luno's might've switched spot's by now." Brendon says, and Gabe nods, obviously agreeing.

"But it couldn't hurt to look either right?" Ryan tries, his voice uncertain. Brendon is watching him intently, like he's trying to figure out what's going on in the other boy's mind. Brendon would normally argue that seeking out luno's was a stupid idea, a suicidal one to boot but the way Ryan's looking, the way Cassie is shaking, he knows that they need to know.

"I suppose I could go and search for some scents..but that's really all we should do right now." Brendon tells them and Ryan nods. Cassie doesn't say anything but she does pull away from Krissy for a moment before staring up at Brendon with sparking blue eyes. She reaches out suddenly and hug's him, mumbling a thank you into the fabric of his shirt.

Brendon is really thrown off by that because even though everyone knows he's okay after being bit, he's also learned that people really don't like to touch him all that much anymore. He used to thrive on touching people but he's cut back on that too because now, even something as simple as a hug could look threathening. Krissy was just about the only one who touched him anymore and he touched back but Brendon wouldn't lie, it felt good to be touched again.

"It's nothing." The boy says and he pat's the girl on the shoulder. Cassie pulling back and staring at him again.

"Do you need something maybe with Patrick's scent on it? Or Jenny's? Would that help?" She's asking and Brendon nods, it really would help. Cassie nods and leaves the room followed by Krissy whose smiling at Brendon, she knows how much he hated his new isolation from human contact.

"How do you feel Ryan?" Gabe is asking, he leans against the kitchen counter and his eyes flicker over the paper before he looks back up at Ryan.

"I'm not sure." Ryan admits, he shrugs and shakes his head, running his hand through his soft brown hair. "It's like..my heart is telling me to do whatever I can to see her again but my mind...it's telling me that she's not the same. She's not the Jenny I knew and that she's dangerous."

At this moment Ryan looks like the textbook definiton of conflicted. They're sure that Cassie feels this way too, her own excitement overriding her fear and that could be dangerous. They should get Jon and have him keep her rational. Brendon nods and steps closer to Ryan, touches his shoulder and Ryan doesn't flinch, not for a second, not like some of the others do.

"If I do find something?" Brendon starts, it sound's like a question but one that Ryan doesn't know how to anwser. Ryan stay's silent and Brendon sighs deeply. "It will be fine. I-I won't do anything rash, I won't make a stupid move." It's the best they could expect from Brendon, his anger being something that's hard to reign in these days. Ryan nods, looks at the floor, eyes flickering with thought.

Cassie and Krissy return, the dark haired girl holding two shirt's out for Brendon to take. One that belonged to Patrick and the other to Jenny. Brendon take's the article's of clothing and he can smell them already, it was so bizarre that he could recognise people by smell, each person distinct in their own way. Brendon decides to go alone, he would just be seeking and he really didn't need any back-up.

Krissy was eyeing him as he prepared to leave but he just kissed her and headed out the door.
*
Brendon take's the truck, starting it and driving down the abandoned dirt trail's that spread out away from the house. Behind him he can see someone walking toward's the garage and it wouldn't surprise him if Gabe had went to collect Jon and the others. The boy has the window's rolled down so he can catch the scent's better, if there were even any scent's to be found.

Beyond the dirt and grass that stretched out around their hideout was a small section of wood's, what used to be the barrier between city and country. Past the wood's was the remain's of the city that a few of them lived in during their teen year's. The road's jagged and broken beneath the tires of the truck. Crumbling piles of what used to be building's, stores, houses and school's. Some building's still stood intact, like their old high school, Brendon didn't think that he'd ever be thrilled about seeing their old school but he was glad that it was still standing.

Brendon was leaned toward's the window, catching something on the wind. He slow's the truck and stop's in the middle of the road, it doesn't matter, barely anyone drives nowadays. He stick's his head out and breathes in deeply, his mind trying to place just what he was smelling. It wasn't Patrick, or Jenny but he could smell blood and he could most definitly smell the scent of luno's. The boy pulls a right and turn's down by where the outlet store is, near the half collasped hospital building.

As he drives closer he can definitly smell blood and luno's, three of them he thinks. It's hard to tell since he's not fully luno his smell isn't as great as their's. A new smell invades Brendon's nose, one that's still a tad bit unfamilar to him but he could still manage to pull it out as different from the luno's. It was William.

That fact make's Brendon drive faster. The man had left the hideout nearly two days ago and he had yet to return. It would be a miracle if he were still alive. Brendon breathes the air deeper, trying harder to get a sense of what he's smelling. The blood, he doesn't think it belong's to William so, maybe the boy is alive after all. The scent lead's Brendon to a parking lot, empty and overgrown with weed's, one lone lamp post being the only light along the entirety of the cracked pavement.

There the boy can see figures, three of them standing and one on the ground. Now that he's here, he knows that William is alive, can smell his adrenaline as he fight's the two remaining luno's. Brendon assumes that William killed a luno and that was the blood he was smelling. The boy revvs the engine and hit's the gas, speeding toward's the two luno's who look ready to pounce on William.

The truck is fast but the luno's are faster and they both just barely make it out of the way of the speeding vechical. William back's away, unable to tell if it's friend or foe in the truck. Brendon pulls a hard left, the tires squealing and buring against the pavement. Andy is going to kill him but he doesn't really care at the moment. Brendon heads toward the larger of the two luno's, hoping that the steel frame of the truck is strong enough to kill the damn beast and not completely desimate said truck. The luno fling's itself around but Brendon is managing to stay on it's tail, following it across the parking lot, bright headlight's trained on the beast. He was praying that William has enough sense to kill the other luno.

The luno lead's Brendon forward toward's a brick wall and it's like a sadistic game of chicken but Brendon isn't stupid. He knows that the luno will move out of the way at the last moment, leaving any hope of Brendon pinning the beast against the wall or his truck making it out alive all but destroyed. The boy pulls another hard left so he's facing back toward's William and he's lost track of his luno but Brendon can see the other boy darting away from the luno attacking him, so, at least he's fine for the moment.

Brendon pulls forward and a loud thump is heard on the bed of the truck. The boy stop's and turn's his head to see the luno he had been chasing is now standing in the truck's bed, staring at him with golden eyes and a hungry smile. The beast take's a step forward and the dark haired boy put's the truck in drive, pulling forward suddenly and causing the luno to tumble backwards into the bed of the truck. During it's brief period of downtime Brendon steer's the truck with one hand and fumbles around for his gun with the other.

The luno is back up and Brendon knows this from the shattering sound of the back window that seperates the cab from the bed breaking into a million pieces and a strong pale hand wrapping around his neck. Brendon turn's right quickly as the hand squeezes around his neck and the luno loses it's footing, slipping to the right, nail's scratching along the fair skin of Brendon's jaw as it slipped away.

He has his gun now and he's prepared for when the luno stands back up, growling and drooling. It's more than apparent that these two luno's aren't part of the smart string, these are the more animalistic one's, the one's that are slightly stronger but easier to trick. Brendon drives straight, one hand on the steering wheel as he twists around and fire's five quick shot's into the luno's body. The luno grunt's each time he get's shot and fall's back, Brendon taking this as an opportunity to make a sharp turn, causing the beast to fall out of the side of the truck and clatter to the hard ground. The boy wastes no time and promptly put's it in reverse, backing over the luno's injured body.

He hears squeal's of pain but he doesn't stop, backing up and then pulling forward again, running over the creature multiple times until he's sastisfied that it's dead. By the time he looks up he can see the firey orange emitting from William's gun as he shoots at the one remaining luno. Brendon speed's forward, intent on hitting this one too if he has to. It turn's out that he doesn't because William fires off two more shot's, ducking and moving gracefully as the luno lunges around him. By the time Brendon get's to him, the luno is dead and William is standing there breathing hard.

Brendon pulls up slowly alongside William. "Will, you okay?" Brendon question's as he eyes the taller boy. William looks alright, he's out of breath and his arms are scratched and bleeding but he seems fine. William is staring at him with dark heavy eyes and it's only then that Brendon remembers what had happened the night before with William leaving because of him. He had been so wrapped up in saving William that he had forgotten that the other boy had pulled a gun on him once.

William was holding a gun now, loose in his hand as he catches his breath. The only reason William had stopped last time was because of the others, now they were all alone. If William wanted to kill Brendon, he could probably do it...and get away with it.

"Yeah, I'm fine." William breathes out. Brendon nods his head.

"Fine, get in and I'll drive you back to the hideout." Brendon tells him, the truck rattling nosily. William looks skeptical, probably afraid to get in the car with a half luno like Brendon. "I'm not going to bite you. You're so not my type." The boy jokes but William looks less than amused, Brendon sighs "Just get in the car. Greta is waiting for you."

It takes a few moment's but William finally gives in and climb's into the cab of the idling truck. He sit's pressed against the door, as far away from Brendon as he can be. It's obvious that he's still not comfortable around Brendon, despite the fact that Brendon just helped kill some luno's, if he really wanted William dead couldn't he have just done nothing?

Even though William is uncomfortable, Brendon can't blame him. Before he was bit he had never met someone who was and if he had, well, who knows how the hell he would've reacted? Maybe it wasn't just William but everyone who met him from here on out. Gabe and the others weren't like that but they weren't all that normal to begin with.

"I bet Greta hates me." William says and Brendon ventures that this is the best the boy can do to start a conversation.

"I haven't really talked to her since you left but Krissy tells me that she's scared you're not coming back." Brendon tells him and William makes a noise between a sigh and a laugh as he looks out the window. Brendon is driving back to the hideout, the previous plan of searching for Patrick and Jenny's scent's abandoned at the moment. The smell of luno is still heavy in the air but it just might be the truck, or William.

"I was coming back tonight." William starts, he's looking straight ahead now, his long fingers pressing against the scratches on his arms. "I was at the store and I was taking the back road's to the hideout. I was cutting through the parking lot when six fucking luno's come out of nowhere and try to start shit with me." William says, his eyes shining with the rush from the fight.

"Six?" Brendon starts. "When I found you there were only three of them."

"I know. Three of them took off. I guess they knew I was too strong for them or something." William explains and he does glance over at Brendon. "Why did you help me after I was so shitty?" He asks, he sound's genuienly mistified, like he never expected Brendon to be a hero. Really, that's a stupid question because Brendon wouldn't be able to just stand there and watch as someone got killed, even if that someone happen's to be William.

"I'm not a monster." Brendon tells him, glancing at the other boy from across the car. They're nearing the edge of the city, heading back up the dark green trail's to the woods. "I'm human just like you." He add's, William looking away from him.
*
Jon was back in the kitchen with Cassie and a few of the others. Gabe had come to get him shortly after Brendon left, had told him about how someone claimed to have seen Patrick and Jenny roaming the city, about how Brendon was going to look for them. Jon had been worried about Cassie at first, that she'd break down like she sometimes did when it came to Patrick. But instead he found her sitting at the kitchen table with Krissy and Ryan, he had sat down next to her and noticed that she looked lost, like she didn't know what was happening at the moment.

"You okay Cass?" Jon asks, he reaches over and takes her hand that's sitting on the table, closing it between both of his. She looks at him with those deep blue eyes, see's him like she's noticing him for the first time. She does a sort of mix between a nod and a shrug. He's starting to think that she's not okay. Honestly she looks like she's on edge but Ryan kind of looks the same. Jon figures it must be because of the terrible internal tug-of-war going on inside them. Happiness that those they love are back again and fear or hate at the fact that those same people are now the enemy.

Jon reaches out and circles his arm around her shoulder, pulling her close to him, his other hand still holding her's. He kisses the top of her head and he can feel her relaxing under his touch. There isn't a lot Jon can do for her but he can do this. He can hold her and comfort her and be there for her when she need's him. He can do this because it's what he want's and what she need's.

Footsteps echo down the staircase and they look back to see Gabe entering the kitchen, white paper in hand. "You guys'." He starts, drawing the other three's attention to him. "We got another fax." He states, raising the paper in his hand a little. Cassie's eyes go wide and she's pulling away from Jon and out of her chair in an instant, standing before Gabe and taking his paper.

"It's from that Mikey guy again." Gabe inform's the other's. "He says that his crew heard that a gang of luno's were hiding out in the old high school by the outlet store." Cassie scans the paper before she turn's and moves back to the table, giving Ryan the paper. The boy looks over it and Cassie moves to sit back down next to Jon, his hands coming to rest on her knees.

"It's possible that they could be there." Gabe says even though he's sure that they're all thinking it. Jon squeezes Cassie's knee and she leans into him.

"Would it be a death trap to go there?" Ryan is asking. No one is anwsering but Jon kind of want's to, he want's to tell them all that yes, it would be dangerous, that someone would probably die if they went. If the luno's had their own hideout, you don't just go up there and waltz inside. "I mean, what if we were prepared?" He continues. Jon can tell this is a battle he is bound to lose, these two, Cassie and Ryan, their need to see Jenny and Patrick again, the want to believe that they're still alive, it was too strong.

There was no way he could win.



Entry twenty one: I'll Follow You Into The Dark

Greta was laying on the bunk that she and William shared. Despite the fact that she was with William, that she was technically his girlfriend, she knew very little about him. William was a private person, the things Greta did know about him where a mix of the things he had opted to tell her after they met, after he had killed Bob and the things she had experienced with him. She knew that he was looking for something, but she didn't know what. She knew that he lost someone very special to him but she didn't even know the girl's name, let alone anything about that girl's life with William.

In all honesty sometimes Greta felt less like a girlfriend to him and more like his property.

If Greta was being honest with herself, she knows that she doesn't love William. It's gratitude, it's protection, comfort, but it isn't love. She doesn't love William Beckett. She doesn't think William really loves her much either. The two of them ending up together by chance, by fate, because William had decided to save her. Greta thinks that the only reason William even keeps her around is because he worries she won't survive on her own and to fight off the lonliness.

It's a relationship of convience and Greta never minded too much until she got here, to this place. When she saw the way Brendon and Krissy acted together, the way Jon took care of Cassie, how much Alex told her he loved Nate, she was jealous.

The backdoor in the kitchen slam's open and closed but Greta doesn't bother to get up. She knows that Brendon left, Krissy filling her in with the minimum of detail's. Greta only knows bit's and pieces about the people here, about the people who used to be here. From her position in the bunk room Greta can see the rickety staircase out the doorway. She hears footsteps and moments later see's Cassie hurrying down the stairs, she doesn't know the other girl well but she knows that Cassie seem's really off today.

Greta can hear the mumbled voices of the people in the kitchen, the light slightly high pitched voice of Cassie asking something of Brendon. Brendon saying something about the truck, about luno's. She can hear more footsteps and someone is coming into the bunkroom, familar legs passing by her bunk and she turn's, sit's up to see William standing at the end of her bunk.

"Will..." She sounds surprised, she is surprised. Greta didn't expect him to come back. The blonde girl can tell that William was in a fight tonight, she can see the scratches on his arms, along with the dried blood. He just smiles at her, not a real smile, not by a long shot but it's the only smile she's ever seen on the boy.

Even looking at him, William is not Greta's type. He's all lean and bony, not at all like Bob was. Bob was all broad muscles, blonde hair as opposed to William's dark. Bob had light eyes, the opposite of the boy she was with now. They were both around the same height but really the two men had nothing else in common. Bob being the complete opposite of William.

William moves forward and sit's down on the edge of the bunk, arms crossed tight across his thin chest.

"I don't blame you if you hate me right now." He says moments later. Greta sit's up, folding her legs indian style and folding her hands in her lap.

"I was worried about you." She states, her voice flat. William nods.

"I know, I'm sorry." Greta echoes William's movement, she want's to believe that he really is sorry but she moreso believes that the two of them are just going through the motion's. Not fighting but just doing whatever they can to keep going, to just keep the peace. They barely ever fight, more often they hold it in, wait for it to all pass by.

"What happened to your arms?" Greta question's, slide's closer to William. The boy looks down at his arms before he looks back up at the blonde girl.

"I was on my way back here when I got ambushed by some luno's." He starts and Greta's light blue eyes go wide. "It was fine...Brendon, came by and found me. Took one of the luno's out for me." He add's. The blonde girls eyes light up a bit. She's glad that William got over his thickheadedness and accepted Brendon as a person, or was at least coming around.

"I'm glad you're alright." She tells him moment's later, William smiles that passive smile again. His hand wind's around the back of Greta's neck and he pulls her close to him, their lips meeting soft and dry.

"You're my girl." He tells her, smiles against her lips before he kisses her once more and pulls away, standing once again. "I've gotta go let Andy take a look at my scratches." He tells her, giving her a reason for his sudden departure. Greta nods, understand's that somethings are more important than kissing. How sometimes, things were more important then her.
*
Brendon, Ryan, and Pete were awake long after everyone else had fallen asleep. The three of them seated at the little wooden table discussing the information that Gabe had uncovered.

"It's really dangerous." Brendon states, his hands folded against the table. "What if there's like a million luno's hiding out in there?" He asks, his dark brown eyes sweeping over his companions.

"We're strong though." Pete insists, he's glancing between Ryan and Brendon. Ryan is being silent but his forehead is crinkled like it is when he's deep in thought. "And there can't be that many luno's there." He add's.

"What do you think Ry?" Brendon presses, Ryan looks up, surprised that he's being pulled into the conversation.

"I-I" He starts, pushes his hand through his brown hair. "I don't know." He admits. Normally, under their usual circumstances he would say no, that this risk was a little too great, that they could die. But at the same time, the temptation that Jenny could be there. The fact that he could see her again, alive, it's too much for him to just ignore.

Ryan knows Cassie feels the same way, and maybe she should be out here talking to them but her face, her action's showed that she was more than willing to go forward with this opperation.

"What if she's not there?" Brendon asks, snapping Ryan back into the present, he looks back at the younger boy. Ryan doesn't say anything so, Brendon continues with hard eyes and a firm voice. "What if we go there and some of us die and she's not even there? Will it still be worth it?" Brendon is obviously trying to guilt trip him into forgetting all about finding the luno version of Jenny.

"Safety comes first. You know that." Ryan replies. No way in hell does he want anyone to die because of his selfish need's. Brendon nods but he's obviously waiting for Ryan to add something else. There's a silence between them before Pete talk's.

"We could..we could go there during the day?" He suggests and Ryan's eyes widen, Brendon looking surprised as well.

"What?" Brendon asks, Pete turning his attention to the youngest boy.

"We could ambush them you know? They sleep during the day..it could be a sneak attack." The oldest boy explain's. Brendon's not usually one to trust Pete Wentz's logic but that kind of makes sense. There's no garuntee that the luno's will be asleep if they go in the day but it's still much better than just showing up at night.

"If we have to, we should do it that way." Ryan says and Brendon sighs but agrees, giving in to the obvious want's of his friend's. It's not like he wouldn't like to see Patrick and Jenny again, they were his friend's too but he knows that they're not human's anymore and he more than anyone knows how dangerous luno's can be.
*
That night Ryan spreads the info about going to the high school to the others. He tells everyone, he's not restricting anyone in this venture. Honestly, they probably need all the help they can get. Cassie volunteers right away with Jon agreeing to go and looking more than worried about this mission, about having his girlfriend coming along. Krissy opts to go which makes Brendon nervous but he'd rather die before he let anything happen to her.

William tells them that it's not the best plan but still agrees to come along, as does Joe The group does have a tendency to leave certain people behind. Andy can't come because he's their doctor, same with Ryland, usually Alex doesn't come and he doesn't exactly seem eager this time. The girl's usually stay behind too but there's no keeping them away this time.

Greta want's to come, she tells William and he flat out refuses. "Jon and Brendon are letting their girlfriend's come along." She point's out and William sighs.

"I'm not them. Greta, we both know that the luno's go after girl's first. Baby, I don't want anything to happen to you." He tells her, taking her wrist and rubbing soft circles into her skin with his thumb. Greta pulls her arm away from him.

"You're my guy William but I'm not letting you tell me what I can and cannot do. I'm going along." William looks taken aback, Greta rarely ever argues with him but she won't take no for an anwser, not this time. The boy mumbles something about stuborn blondes before he walks away.

The group spends the rest of that night perparing for the next morning. Making sure weapons are loaded, making sure everyone has a weapon. Ryan, Pete, Cassie, Brendon, and Krissy all sit around the table mapping out the layout of their old high school from memory.

"There's four floor's including a basement." Ryan states.

"There's a bunch of hidden door's and staircases." Cassie tells them, pointing them out for Pete to draw on the makeshift map. She remembers them so well because she and Jenny used to skip their gym class and go hiding along the staircases and door's.

"Wasn't there a few tunnels in there? Like leading from the basement to the cafeteria?" Brendon asks, his memory a bit fuzzy on the whole high school situation. Krissy nods.

"Not to mention the gazillion classroom's on each floor...and the bathroom's." The blonde girl add's. Pete's hand flies over the paper, scribbling out all the things they were pointing out.

"Gym...pool...lockeroom's." He mumbles as he draw's them out. afterwards he set's his marker down, the group stares down at the paper, at the large amount of space the luno's could be hiding.

"That's a lot of ground to cover." Ryan says after a moment, scrubbing his hand over his face. For the first time the boy sound's doubtful, like, he's getting that doing this isn't such a great idea after all.

"We'll be fine." Brendon starts, his fingers tapping out on the white paper. "We'll stick together, have each others back's..we'll be fine." He tells the remaining people. They have to be fine, there's no other option.
*
The group leaves just after dawn break's. The van is still out of comission, Andy promising to keep working on it while they're gone, so they have to take the truck. Krissy drives, Greta and Cassie riding up in the cab with her. The boys are piled in the back of the truck, sitting hunched, weapons in tow and this all feels too much like a suicide mission, that they could very well lose someone this time. It feels akin to war and how solider's about to enter a battle would look and feel.

The sunlight is creeping out of the decimated land, casting bright ray's and dark shadows everywhere. Cassie's heart was beating wildly in her chest. She was insanely anxious, scared, what if he was there? What if she saw Patrick again? Could she handle it? She tries not to think about it, she and Ryan haven't thought about it, what would happen once they actually saw them again. Luno's think only about killing human's and vice versa. She knows right away that she'd never be able to kill either of them, she couldn't do it, not ever.

The girl turn's around a bit, peering through glass that seperates the cab and bed, a plastic bag stuffed in the hole where the luno had punched through the night before. Cassie is peering back through the glass to look at the boys in the back. Her eyes flicker over Ryan, his head is bowed and his mouth is tight. She wonder's if he'd be able to kill Jenny. Her gaze then moves to Jon, her source of comfort as of late. He's noticed her staring back at him and he drops the previously worried look he had on his face to give her the slightest of smiles.

Cassie return's his smile, trying to let him know that she's okay. She presses her hand to the window, fingers splayed against the cool glass. She turns back around after a few moment's, still attempting to remain calm.

Krissy rambles down the same road that Brendon had taken the night before. Turning to the left as opposed to the right, heading down the broken road's to where their old high school sit's. It didn't take long to get to the building, it was huge and looming, one of the only remaining building's on that side of town. The girl stop's, parking the truck just outside the long chain link fence that ran around the school building.

The boy's hop out of the back of the truck, gun's drawn and faces tight. The three girl's join them shortly after, each one herded back by their boyfriend's. Brendon and Pete lead the small group, silent steps along the dusty earth that lead's to the large double door's of the brick faced school. The school really has held up well, sturdy and mostly intact. The group of nine stopping just outside the two solid door's.

"Listen," Brendon starts, turning back to look at the group. "We stick together no matter what. No one goes on their own, got it?" He asks, his voice low and slightly dangerous. Various people nod but Brendon is eyeing William like he knows that the boy won't be able to follow this paticular rule. "Got it Will?" He add's, William glares at Brendon for a moment before he's nodding too.

"Got it."

After that Brendon grab's at the double door's, trying to pry them open. They rattle but remain closed. "Locked probably." Ryan mutters from behind Brendon. The half luno growls and he grip's the door's out of frustration, tugging back as hard as he can, Krissy's almost afraid that he'll pull his own arms off. The door's shake and they hear a loud clanking noise, one of them falling open for Brendon, a broken chain on the dusty floor of the foyer.

He grab's up his gun and steps inside, acting as their sort of test subject. Brendon is standing in the middle of the foyer and still nothing has happened, the others take that as a sign for them to move in too. Shortly all nine of them are on the main floor of the high school.

It's dark inside, the outside light blocked by the thick dust on the window's. Sunlight spilling only in small frames along the floor caused by the bit's of broken glass in the high rise window's. They have no idea where to start, the whole purpose was to go about finding Jenny and Patrick but the two could be anywhere in this building, or worse they weren't here at all.

The group starts down the main hall, heading to the left. There's three or four rooms on this floor, including a staircase that leads up to the upper floor's and another that heads down to the basement floor. Brendon lead's the group once again, moving toward's the first classroom on the floor. He keep's them all back as he moves forward, grabbing the door, gun drawn and pulls it open, pistol aimed at any would be luno.

Nothings in the room, just cracked and broken down desk's, an old dusty chalkboard and nothing else. This room is well lit, that's probably why there's no one in here.

The next two rooms are the same, the windows in these rooms busted out and sunlight pouring through the dusty rooms. Cassie finds herself somewhat relieved by this, she watches Ryan carefully each time the rooms are open. She doesn't miss the flashes of disappointment on his face, she see's them because she has them too. That difficult mix of emotion's, that never ending fear that they will run into Patrick and Jenny and the hope that they do.

They circle back around, standing in the foyer once again. "I think we should each take seperate floor's." William suggests as they stand in silence, Brendon focusing to try and smell anything that might be in the school. He's not getting anything good, all dirt and old paper.

"What?" Brendon spit's out, whirling around and looking at the brown haired boy. "What did I say before we came in here William? I said that we don't split up!" Brendon hisses, trying to keep his voice low.

"It's going to take an eternity if we all stick together. We're better off breaking into smaller group's...group's of three." William replies. Maybe that's why Brendon doesn't really care too much for William, the new boy trying to take over Brendon's role as battle leader. Brendon's condition probably making it worse what with the whole need to be the alpha male and all. The half human glares at the older boy for a beat before he shakes his head.

"No, it's way too risky. Not everyone is as skilled a fighter as you and I." The boy states. William rolls his eyes and Ryan lay's his hand on Brendon's arm. The younger boy turning his head instantly to lock eyes with his older friend.

"I think we should Bren." He says softly.

"Ryan! You know how dangerous this is." Brendon's eyes widen as he stares at Ryan. The older boy nods.

"I know, but the rest of us aren't completely helpless. We can't just pittle around and wait for them to find us Bren." Ryan tries to reason with him. Brendon is looking like he doesn't like this idea at all but if it's what his friend's want to do than how can he stop them?

"What do the rest of you think?" Brendon asks the other six members of their group trying to gauge the others opinion's.

"The boys could protect the girls. Seperate the strong fighters into different groups." William tells them, attempting to get the others to agree. No one else is really saying anything but Brendon knows that this is a losing battle.

"Fine, we'll seperate. Each group takes a floor and try not to be heroes okay people?" He says firmly. He's pretty determined to leave with the same amount of people they came in with.

They break up into group's after that. Brendon, Krissy, and Ryan in one group, Jon, Cassie, and Pete in the second and the last one comprised of William, Greta, and Joe. They break off on different floor's as well. Brendon's group taking the basement floor because that's where most of the luno's will probably be. William's group takes the third floor while Pete's group takes the second floor.
*
Krissy is still nervous despite the fact that she's in a group with Brendon, arguably the best fighter among them. She's not so much nervous for herself but moreso her friend's. Cassie and Jon in paticular, they're some of her oldest friend's, it would kill her to lose them. She's sure though that Jon and Pete would do whatever they could to keep Cassie safe though so, maybe she doesn't have to worry so much. William too seem's to have things under control so despite them being in a possible den of luno's, she feels pretty safe.

The three of them clomp down the back steps, heading down into the massive darkness. There are really no window's down here, no lights, almost a complete veil of black falling over them. Krissy remembers that the pool was down here, as well as the locker rooms and a few spare classroom's, not a hell of a lot else.

"Think we should check the locker rooms?" Ryan whispers and they can see Brendon nodding infront of them. His hand hovering insanely close to Krissy wrist, just in case he need's to pull her to safety at a moment's notice.

"Yeah, this way." Brendon tells them, leading them to the left, toward's a heavy door that they can just make out is labled as the boy's locker room. They push through and again it's darkness but a more intense form of darkness, one that would make seeing anything impossible. Krissy can hear Ryan moving around and second's later a small golden light flicker's on. Ryan had a flashlight.

Brendon looks surprised at him and the other boy shrugs. "If I didn't end up in your group I would've gave it to you anyway." He tells Brendon, Ryan knowing full well that the basement floor would be the darkest of the floor's, the most likely to harbor luno's, the most dangerous. They let Ryan work the flashlight, scanning the row's of now rusted locker's and grimey floor's. The school is a lot scarier in the dark, even more when you add luno's to the mix. The light is small and reveals only a small circle of the room to them at a time.

The trio wind's around corners, checking small spaces and ignoring the sound of dripping pipes. They move forward, edging toward's the back of the locker room, toward's a silver door that lead's to the school's pool. The floor under them is damp here, their shoes squeaking and sliding on the tiles. There's a line of showers to the left of them and they stop to scan it, the light moving slowly along each one.

Despite her previous statement of safety Krissy's heart feels like it's in her throat. This all feels like a horror movie, one where the killer pop's out of nowhere. It's pretty cliche but she is not ruling it out.

"I think we're good in here. Should we go to the pool area?" Ryan asks waiting for an anwser from Brendon.

"Yeah, I think we-" Brendon is cut off by a sudden loud clattering that sound's like it came from either behind them or above them. The three of them whirl around, expecting a snarling luno to be standing there. Ryan scan's around but finds nothing, but that doesn't stop Krissy's heart from pounding so, so hard in her chest. The brown haired boy check's above them too but there's nothing up there except the dry plaster ceiling and some rusted dripping pipes.

"Probably one of the others." Brendon tries to assure them but now Krissy is worried. They're not in danger but what if one of their friend's is? "I'm sure they're fine..just opening a door or something." He adds, like he's trying to convince himself of that.

When they're sure that they're in no real danger they move back toward's the door to the pool, silver and shining in the light from the flashlight. Brendon pulls it open, it sticks a bit but it open's fine. They're hit with the strong stench of clorhine and Brendon makes a soft choking noise, the scent too strong for his inhuman nose.

The pool room is even creepier than the locker room had been. There are small lights here, stuck up atop the metal ceiling, illuminating the dirty water below. Dripping sound's surround them and the floor's here are slick and wet as well. The smell of the room, old and strong. Ryan scan's the flash light around the edges of the pool, all cement wall's clearly abanandoned long ago.

The three of them step further into the room, Brendon pressing is hand into Krissy wrist, his other hand coming up to cover his nose and mouth. If the clorhine was this bad for him, well, then she really doubted any other full luno's would bother coming down here.

"Are you okay?" She whispers quietly and Brendon nods.

"Fine." He grunt's back out as they move along the line of the murky water. There isn't a lot of space between them and the water, the tiled floor seperating them narrow and chipped.

"I don't think there's anything down here." Ryan says, his flash light still scanning the area, it's small and dim compared to the darkness in the room but Krissy is about to agree with him, tell Brendon that they should go back and help the other's just in case they need it.

"Fuck, this clorhine is affecting my smelling. I can't tell if there's even anything down here." He grumbles out and he sound's pissed. Krissy knows that Brendon hates it when his luno side isn't useful. Ryan stop's walking, causing Krissy and Brendon to stop as well.

"If it's fucking with you than I can't imagine any other full blooded luno's being down here." The older boy says. Brendon looks like he's about to agree with him when suddenly a wet slapping sound is heard, like someone is running along the slick tiles. Before either of them notice, something leap's out of the darkness and grab's Ryan, it attempt's to make the wide gap between the side of the pool they were standing on and the direct opposite side but the beast fail's and instead he and Ryan crash into the murky water with a loud splash.

The brown haired boy makes a yelping noise and is struggling, having dropped his flashlight against the tiled floor. It nearly fall's into the water but Krissy manages to drop down and scoop it up, her shaking hands flailing around the room, trying to pinpoint where Ryan now is.

Krissy finds them in the water, the medium sized luno exploding from the water with a panting Ryan in it's arms. Ryan is still fighting with it, struggling helpless and wet in the beast's grasp. Brendon instantly makes a growling noise and the luno down in the dark liquid laughs. "I knew I smelt a pathetic half-breed." It snarl's out, sounding amused, pissing Brendon off more than he already was. "And look, you were nice enough to bring me snack's." The luno's deep voice booms out, it's shining white fangs barred and he's looking down at Ryan like he's ready to kill.

"Too bad, you can't have him." Brendon snap's out and he makes a move like he's about to dive into the black depth's of the pool. "Krissy, if it comes over here...just run okay? Don't worry about anything...just run." He command's her and the blonde girl nods, she doesn't know if she can actually bring herself to leave them behind but she'll tell Brendon anything he want's to hear. Just as soon as Brendon makes a move to go after the luno, the large beast smirks and sinks back underwater, Ryan still in his arms.

"Ryan!" Krissy scream's, Brendon makes another growling noise and before Krissy can stop him he's diving into the stagnent water after the luno. Krissy, shaking, shines the light into the water, desperate to see where her boyfriend and friend are. The light doesn't push through the dirty water well but the girl can just make out the figures. Brendon trying desperately to get to where the luno is swimming seamlessly through the water, Ryan still tucked under the beast's arm.

Brendon catches up with the luno, get's a hand on the beast, using his force to push it back against the cement wall. The luno finally releases Ryan and the brown haired boy explodes up from the water, gasping for breath.

"Ryan!" Krissy yell's, aiming the light at him and calling for him to come to her. "Come on, I'll get you out." She yell's as she drops to her knees on the tiles, her arm extended for him to grab on to. Ryan's not the best swimmer and he's a good length away from her but he pushes through the thick, dark water, trying to make his way to the blonde girl.

Another loud splash and Krissy turns her head to see that Brendon and the luno have also resurfaced. The luno trying to break away from where Brendon has his arms wrapped around the beast's neck. The luno manages to grab Brendon by the collar of his coat and flip him, the dark haired boy slamming back into the water. It's all the time the luno need's to push off the wall and rocket back toward's where Ryan is still swimming, still trying to get to Krissy.

Ryan does get to her and their fingers touch, his cold and wet against her smooth skin. Krissy gets her hand wrapped around his. Ryan's hand slipping a bit but his fingers are digging into the fabric of her jacket as she attempt's to pull him out of the water.

"It's okay, Ry." Krissy mumbles out straining to pull him out and not get dragged down herself. Ryan doesn't weigh much, even when he's soaking wet but she still can't get a good grip on him. She pulls backwards but Ryan's slipping away from her. Finally Krissy decides to set the flashlight aside, her other arm grabbing a hold of Ryan, tugging him up. Ryan slides up and is halfway out of the water, his free arm scrabbling against the tiles. Krissy can hear splashing but she doesn't look up, she knows Brendon can handle the luno, all she need's to focus on is getting Ryan out of the water, away from danger.

It looks like she will when there's more splashing and a dark figure explodes out of the water right behind Ryan. At first Krissy thinks that it's Brendon but then there's another explosion of someone popping up from under the water.

"Krissy get him out of there!" Brendon yell's, his voice is too far away to be the figure behind Ryan and she knows that it's the luno. The beast smirks again, teeth glinting in the dim light. The luno is much faster than Krissy, the beast wrapping it's hands around Ryan's shoulder and pulling him back into the dirty water.

"No!" Krissy scream's as Ryan is pulled back under the water. Brendon is up and out of the water running toward's them but he isn't quite fast enough. Krissy knows that Ryan could be bit or drown any second now so, she knows that she has to do whatever she can to save the brown haired boy. The blonde girl pulls her gun out from the back of her jean's, grab's up the flash light and angles it toward's the water. Aiming as carefully as she can Krissy fires second's before Brendon dives back into the water.

Acrimson color rises up to the surface of the water, billowing out in intricate shapes in the black water. No one is moving, no one has come up yet. Krissy is scared, what if she shot Ryan? God, she'd never forgive herself for doing that, for taking things into her own hands when Brendon easily could've handled it. She leans forward a bit, shaking because Brendon hasn't come back up either. She leans down toward's the water, her hands on the stone siding as she peer's into the dark water. Suddenly two figures rocket up from under the water. Krissy recoiles a bit as she doesn't know who it is yet.

The figure moves fast and Krissy can see now that it's Brendon and the limp figure in his arms is Ryan. "Take him Krissy." Brendon cough's out, trying to hand off Ryan to her. She nods, her heart in her throat because unlike Brendon, Ryan isn't coughing. She get's her arms around the thin boy and pulls him up and out of the water, move's him back until he's laying straightened out on the tiles.

Brendon climb's out of the water and Krissy really want's to ask some question's but she doesn't. Instead the girl watches as Brendon tip's Ryan's head back and presses their lips together. She's confused for a split second before she realizes that Brendon is giving the older boy CPR. Krissy panickes because he's not, Ryan isn't breathing.

Brendon does it again and again, Krissy watching in horror, praying that Ryan wakes up. He's still and soaking wet, his lithe body limp on the tiles and his face oddly pale. Finally her prayers are anwsered when Brendon pulls off and Ryan is sputtering, Brendon tipping him forward so he can cough up the water that had previously been filling his lung's. Krissy is relieved but Brendon looks anything but. She notices her boyfriend taking off his jacket and his t-shirt, using his luno strength to rip off a piece of said soaked t-shirt.

"Brendon?" Krissy question's, quietly confused, watching her boyfriend as he takes the newly acquired strip of cloth and proceeds to wrap it around Ryan's hand, the girl's eyes following and it's only then that Krissy realizes what's happened to the boy.

*
Pete lead's his group up the solid staircase, he happen's to be infront with Cassie sandwhiched between himself and Jon. The younger boy refusing to have Cassie bring up the rear because he firmly believes that they could get surprise attacked from behind. Pete isn't sure whether or not they'll actually run into any luno's, let alone Patrick's luno. He isn't sure what Cassie thinks, he still really hasn't apologized to the girl about the whole blowing up at her ordeal, the chaos with the luno information pushing any chance at apologizing away.

Pete wonders if Cassie wants Patrick to be here, just like he does.

They stop at the second floor landing. A dozen little classroom's scattered through out the hallway along with a library. At the end of the long second floor hallway is a staircase that lead's to the third floor, the floor that William, Greta, and Joe took. The trio stop's outside the first few door's. Pete pushing them open and finding absolutely nothing.

"It looks like this floor is going to be a bust too." Pete murmurs, Jon looks relieved and Cassie looks conflicted.

"Think we should split up here too?" Cassie asks a few second's later.

"What?" Jon whispers, his low voice almost a hiss. Cassie who had been looking at Pete turn's back to look at Jon.

"You know, like, Pete goes off on his own and you and I stay together?" She says and maybe she really hasn't forgiven Pete after all.

"Trying to get rid of me Cassie?" Pete tries for joking but it comes out just a shade too dark. She looks back at him with neutral blue eyes.

"No, I just figure if there's nothing up here we can search through the rooms and move on. Cover more ground you know?" She replies, her voice is blank and it seem's that she has replaced the anger with nothing, with acting like Pete is insignificant. Pete is kind of figuring that maybe Cassie is wishing that Patrick is here, or at least that there is another hint to where he could be. Jon comes up behind the dark haired girl and places his hand on her shoulder, giving it a squeeze.

"That's a little dangerous, don't you think?" He asks quietly, Cassie, leaning back and looking up at him.

"I feel safe with you Jon." She tells him and they share a small smile. Pete grimacing at them slightly.

"Fine, I'll take the library and you two check the classroom's." Pete decides firmly, Jon and Cassie nod. Pete grab's out his gun, holding it level with his head as he walks down the hall to the library. Cassie and Jon waiting until Pete actually goes into the library before they begin checking the classroom's.

Pete is still a little pissed about the fact that Cassie is basically with Jon. He can't get over it, as long as he's know Cassie she's been Patrick's friend, Patrick's girlfriend, Patrick's wife, the love of his life, and now she's Jon's girlfriend and Pete still can't get used to it. He can't really blame the girl though, he misses Ashlee everyday, every moment of his life but he can't promise that if another girl was there for him in the same way Ashlee was, well, he doesn't know whether he'd be able to resist that girl or not.

The library is dark but that's what Pete expected. It's also oddly large and sprawling, a good amount of the book's and shelves are gone leaving wide gap's of empty space. The boy pad's around on the carpeted floor, looking for any sign's of luno's and listening for any signs that Cassie and Jon are in danger. Pete work's the whole ninja/secret spy angle of hunting, pressing himself against shelves and peeking around corner's. He also has a penchant for attempting cool moves and spouting cheesy lines on occasion. Patrick used to call it flasy fighting but Pete thinks it's because he learned to fight from action movies.

The boy round's a few corner's, finding nothing but still not relaxing. Some luno's are smart bastard's who have wicked sadistic sides and like to tease or torture human's before they kill them. That being a good reason for them to turn dead human's, all to drive the other human's crazy.

Pete finds a wall and follow's it to the left. His hand trailing along the smooth wooden wall, letting it lead him along the room. The room is lit a bit, little draft's of light from outside sneaking into the room, keeping it lit enough for Pete not to bump into things and to be able to see if luno's suddenly come at him. The wall lead's around the corner and again Pete is following, quietly until his hand hit's what feels like a doorknob. He's too far away for this to be the door that he came in from so Pete's guessing that it's a second door entirely. He presses the knob in, pushing forward without hesistation to see what's behind the door.

It's dark in this room too and hell of a lot smaller. There are two large window's at the top of the room but both are closed up tight, not a speck of light leaking through anywhere. Pete feels around the wall's on either side of the doorway to find a light switch and to his surprise he does. Smirking, Pete flips the switch, bathing the room in a pale white light.

The room is small, probably used to be a storage room or something like that. It's pratically empty except for two messy cot like beds stuffed into the room. Pete doesn't know what this is, if people live here or if luno's actually sleep in bed's like people do? He can't see why they wouldn't, they mostly look like people, not human in size or strength but human enough as it is. If the boy is right in the way that he is thinking, that this is a luno bedroom, well, that just can't be good.

*
Joe would actually perfer if he wasn't with this William guy. Sure, he had been the one to actually find William and Greta and bring them back to the hideout but that doesn't mean that he like's the guy or anything. In fact with all the shit the boy's been pulling, he doesn't really like him at all. Greta is okay though, kind and happy, too good for William in Joe's opinion.

The curly haired boy also doesn't much care for the fact that William's gone all 'Team Leader' on them, ordering them around like they're idiots who can't survive a moment without him. Joe is kinda wishing that he had just snuck off and joined Pete's group but then if something happened to Greta, well, he'd feel bad. In all reality Joe should've just stayed behind with Andy and worked on fixing the van.

He's basically the only one left with a hint of machinery knowledge. Andy and Jon try to help but those two mostly take their cues from him. The only reason Joe even came was to keep an eye on Pete, a job that used to belong to Patrick. That was his other reason though, maybe to see Patrick again.

Joe's group is currently on their fifth room, the three of them finding little to nothing at all. The boy can tell that William is itching for a fight, his narrow face falling each time they open a room and find nothing. Joe doesn't really get how someone could want a fight to happen, could want to fight with the luno's and risk their lives. He barely believes that he's doing this right now.

William leaves their fifth room and they move on to the next one. Greta sticking close to the thin boy's back while Joe hang's back mostly bored. He's not really expecting anything to happen. The fax they got was probably all just bullshit anyway and they'd leave here tired, pissed and disappointed. Joe should probably learn not to expect things to be boring, not to expect things to be normal because he's totally caught off guard when William throws open the door to the sixth room and two luno's are in there, crouching down and ready for them.

"Greta move!" William shout's behind him and the girl, as if by instinct moves back as far as she can. William already has his weapon drawn and he fires without warning at the beast's. Joe can hear snarling noises coming from in the room but he can only see one luno, a slightly large male as it charges out of the room, coming straight at Greta.

William is preoccupied with the other one even as Greta scream's and tries to dart backwards. Joe swear's loudly before he rushes sideway's slamming into the luno at the last second, pressing the beast up against the metal locker's that line the third floor wall's. The beast is stunned for a split second, allowing Greta to escape from danger as she closes herself inside one of the other classroom's. Joe didn't really hurt the luno, just pissed it off.

The luno raises it's arm and throws him back, making him fly the short distance between the two wall's, his back hitting the hard metal of the locker's on that side of the room. Joe feels numb instantly, his head swimming and his vision is grey around the edges. He's pretty sure he's slumped down against the locker's and sitting on the floor but he can't be too sure, he might have a concusion.

"Joe!" He can hear Greta's feather light voice yell from inside her safe spot in the classroom. Joe doesn't know where his gun is, can't quite lift his arm to get it, he also doesn't know where William is for that matter. He's thinking that William is a pretty shitty team leader.

Joe can hear a door banging open and he can barely make out the figure of the hulking luno advancing on him, probably ready to kill him. Shit, he didn't want to go out this way..he so much more perfered the going out in a heroes style, the way Patrick did, the way Spencer and Jenny did. Maybe he is going out a hero's way though because he did save Greta...that has to count for something right?

Just as Joe is sure he's supposed to be dead he hears several gun shot's, see's a pair of thin leg's and the hem of a skirt standing behind the luno that's advancing on him. The beast grunt's and fall's down, not as strong as Joe thought. The gun shot's continue and he can hear the soft grunt's of a girl, Greta...Greta is the one shooting the luno? The girl doesn't stop shooting until she's sure the thing is dead, wasting two round's on the beast.

"William, where the fuck are you?" Greta is screaming and yeah, Joe would really like to know the anwser to this question but he can't really keep his eyes open. If he is concussed he knows that he shouldn't close his eyes, that he shouldn't go to sleep but he feels really tired and his eyes feel way too heavy. "Joe? Joe? Are you alright?"

Joe can barely make out Greta's beautiful, not to mentioned worried face floating over him before his eyes close and he knows that saving her had to count for something.
*
"You're not mad at me for seperating from Pete are you?" Cassie asks Jon as they stand outside one of the classroom's. Cassie thinks that this one used to be the math classroom, not a class that she was paticularly fond of. Jon looks back at her as he draws his gun.

"No, I'm not mad. I just want to do whatever I can to keep you safe." He tells her, his brown eyes soft as is his voice.

"I know that and I do feel safe." She replies, reaching out to touch his arm. Jon's tense, obviously worried. Cassie wonder's why she isn't the same. For the most part she does feel safe, she's moreso curious and she knows that it's a bad way to think, to not be afraid in this situation but she really can't help it, the prospect's of seeing Patrick again, even if it is a luno Patrick, she cannot make herself fear that.

Jon moves to open the math classroom, his one hand up motioning for Cassie to stay back. She nods and does what he silently asks, staying back until he determines it's safe. Jon didn't even want to come here, didn't want her to come, the least she can do is listen to him. The boy open's the door and slides silently inside the dark room, Cassie is nervous now, she may not be scared for herself but she's scared for him, she doesn't want anything to happen to Jon. It's quiet and the girl takes that as a good sign, if he's not firing then he's okay.

The girl is so preoccupied in worrying about whether or not Jon is safe that she's not paying much attention to the things around her. To the footsteps whisper quiet behind her or the hands that wrap around her mouth and waist.

She does manage to let out a half scream, trying to alert Jon to her predicament.

Cassie get's pulled into an open classroom, the door slamming behind her and she's instantly slammed against the hard wall. The girl's head hit's the back of the wall hard and she winces in pain. Cassie feels her arms get pulled up over her head, a strong hand managing to pin both her wrist's against the cold wall. It's dark in the room but there's a bit of light filtering in through long slants across the floor, lighting it up enough for her to see a very familar pair of blue eyes staring at her.


Entry twenty-two: I Was Burried Alive, I Came Back To Haunt You

Cassie's first instinct is to call for Jon, to scream for him until her lung's are burning because this, this is dangerous. But she can't, she can't make any sort of noise, not because she is being stopped physically but because there, right infront of her is Patrick.

He's definitly not human anymore, he's the same yet so completly different that her mind can't comprehend it all. He's taller than he was when he was human, they used to be the same height but now, he had at least six inches on her. Patrick's eyes were different too, still blue but a bright electrict blue, a very non-human color. He's staring at her and his mouth is open a bit, teeth sharp and gleaming white, equally inhuman.

He's making noises, growling noises and no, that's not human either.

Cassie's mind if flashing back to the last time she saw Patrick, the last time she saw human Patrick. He was dying...hurt and dying in the infirmary back at the hideout. His eyes had still been shining and he was holding her hand and apologizing over and over again, telling her that he was so sorry for not being able to keep his promise. Seeing him now, it all came rushing back so hard, the emotions stronger then she's ever thought she's felt them. It take's Cassie a moment to realize that she's crying, silent tears down her pale cheek's.

She thinks that she might be panicking, her body, mind, soul, not able to handle seeing him again. Dead people don't just come back.

"Patrick..." She finally says almost breathlessly, her voice is weak and watery but he hears her and he growls again.

"Why'd you people come here?" He snarl's, Cassie's eyes widen, his voice, god, she never thought she'd hear that voice again, Patrick sounded the same. The girl's heart is caught between feeling like it's exploding in her chest and also dropping to her feet because he doesn't remember her. Patrick doesn't know who she is just like Gabe said might happen, just like Brendon was worried about, Just like Jon tried to tell her. She hadn't wanted to believe it but now, well, she really didn't have another choice.

She's still crying, trying not to break down in sob's because she knows that now he won't care if she cries. "We-I came here to find you Patrick." She says softly. Patrick scowl's.

"Stop calling me that name. I don't know who that is." He snarl's and he moves his face closer to her's. Cassie can feel her wrist's bruising under his tight grip. Patrick leans forward, their faces inches apart and Cassie would normally kill for them to be this close again but not like this, like this she can tell that he's not the same. This isn't her Patrick. Luno Patrick lowers his face to her neck, nosing against the soft skin, smelling her. It was fucking creepy and she was shaking, she'd probably collapse if he weren't holding her up.

Cassie hears a banging noise and she thinks that it's the door next to the room she's in. Jon, it's probably Jon coming out of the room. "Cassie? Shit! Cassie, where are you?" Jon call's out, confirming her suspicions.

Patrick lifts his head, sniff's the air before he looks at her. "Cassie..." He mutters out, his eyes locked on her's. "Is that you?" He asks. Cassie nods as much as she can with the way he's holding her arms. "Cassie..." He repeats and for a brief second he looks conflicted, his eyes taking on a slightly dazed, far away look. It's all the time Cassie need's.

"Jon! Jon help me! I'm in a room with Patrick! It's luno Patrick, Jon!" Cassie scream's as loud as she can and Patrick recoiles, frowning and he releases her hands making her slump against the wall before he slaps a hand over her mouth, too hard and once again her head hit's the brick faced wall. Patrick's free hand moves to the doorknob, grabbing it and holding it closed, trying to prevent Jon from getting into the room to save her.

"Cassie!" The girl can hear Jon at the door, hear him pull at it but Patrick is now stronger than him, holding the door closed with only one hand, a minimum of strength. Cassie is still crying, crying because Patrick is no longer her's, crying because Jon can't save her. The girl's tear's roll down her cheek's and over the back of Patrick's sharp fingered hand. Again Patrick makes a face at the use of her name and it looks like he's getting pissed.

"How many of you are there?" Patrick breathes out, removing his hand from her mouth so she can give him an anwser.

"Nine." She replies her voice soft but she's crying, making sound's and Jon can hear her.

"Cassie! It will be okay, alright? I promise it will be okay." He's trying to reassure her and she can hear the door banging, Jon desperate to get in. In all the time she's known him, Cassie's always believed Jon, every word he said to her but now, this time might be an exception. This time she doesn't think she's going to make it out alive.

"You came here to kill us." Patrick hisses out. His hand is on her shoulder, holding her pressed tight against the wall. Cassie shakes her head and a sob break's through. "Don't lie!" Patrick yell's, his voice loud, never like it was when he was a human. "I can already smell luno blood in the building...your friend's have already killed mine..." He trail's off, his voice quiet once again.

Patrick is looking at her, staring into her eyes and she's praying, praying that he see's a spark of something, see's something that used to be there. His lips curve up into a malicious smile. "Don't you think it's only fair that we take out some of you people too?" He question's, his hand slides up from her shoulder. Icy fingers running along her collarbone until his fingers are resting against her neck. She's shivering despite herself, maybe from fear, maybe just because it's Patrick.

"Don't you fucking touch her!" Jon shout's from the other side of the door.

"Human's are so incredibly easy." He states. "You all love each other so damn much, to the point where you're willing to die for one another...where you're willingly to do whatever you can to save each other." Patrick says darkly and Cassie sob's a bit harder, that's not her Patrick, it really isn't.

"Jon..I'm sorry." Cassie says suddenly, taking the opportunity to talk to Jon while she can.

"No!" Jon replies feverently. "Don't say that." He knows what she's trying to do, she's trying to say goodbye.

"I'm so sorry, I should've listened to you. He isn't the same...you were right...I'm sorry." Cassie repeat's. God, if she's going to die she doesn't want Jon here to listen to it. There's banging on the white plexiglass window of the door, Jon still trying to get into the room. Patrick is looking at her again, watching her intently as his hand moves up and wraps loose around her neck.

"So pathetic." He half whispers, Jon still doing everything in his power to get into the room as Patrick tightens his grip around her neck.

It hurt's, instant pain flashing through her body. It's like drowning, one of the worst ways to die. She can feel her breath stopping as Patrick squeezes her throat, cutting off the air to her lung's. She's coughing and her mouth fall's open. She's making horrible sound's, something like gasps and grunt's of pain. Cassie's hands come up to Patrick's one arm, nails scratching at his skin, hands, anything she can. It hurt's, god, it hurt's so bad.

Her eyes are open and Patrick is staring at her again.

She can't believe this is how it's going to end. Cassie is going to die and it's her own fucking fault. She should've listened to them all along, she shouldn't have tried to find him again. But she didn't, she didn't listen and now she was getting strangled by her husband, back from the dead.

Her brain is going kinda fuzzy and her lung's are burning with the need for air. She can hear Jon screaming for her, for Pete, for any sort of help. She wishes he didn't have to hear her choking. It's really fucking terrible that in these last moment's of her life is when she really realizes just how much she care's about him, how much she does in fact love him. So much that she's not worried about dying, she's worried about how her death is going to affect him, who will take care of him after she's dead? If he'll blame himself for letting it happen? She really hopes he doesn't because it isn't anyone's fault but her own.

Cassie really wishes she could've told him that she loved him back when she had the chance.

Her nails are still digging into the skin of Patrick's arm, drawing blood but he's not stopping. He could probably snap her neck, crush her throat with one hand but he's not, he's drawing her death out, like he's getting some kind of sick enjoyment out of all of this. She's still crying through it. It's sadder knowing that Patrick and Jenny won't be waiting for her after she dies. Spencer will though...and so will Nate.

"Patrick! Don't, please, don't hurt her!" Jon is screaming, pleading, his voice is breaking, she knows he's crying. Cassie feels Patrick's grip loosen for a split second when Jon says his name. "Patrick, you told me to not let anything happen to her. You made me promise. You would never hurt Cassie...please!" He's still pounding on the door, god, she wishes she could see him just one more time.

Again Patrick's grip slackens at his own name and Cassie's. He's got that far away look again, he looks like he's in pain. He comes back to himself though and he raises her higher, Cassie's feet leaving the ground. That's when she starts kicking at him, wild desperate swing's in the hopes that she'll hurt him enough to allow him to drop her.

At this rate she'll be dead within two minutes. Her body and brain screaming for oxygen. Cassie is shaking with the kicking, shaking enough that the silver chain around her neck, the one with her wedding ring on it, bounces against her chest and out of her shirt, draping itself around Patrick's wrist.

Cassie's vision is going fuzzy. The girl thinks she can hear Jon calling for Pete, thinks she can hear Pete saying something but it all sound's so far away. She thinks that Patrick is looking at the necklace after a moment she's sure she's dead because she can't feel the pain anymore...

But she can't be dead because she's drinking in large amounts of air, burning her lung's but she doesn't care because it feels like her heart is going to explode. Patrick's hand isn't around her throat anymore, he's not holding her anymore and it takes her a long moment to realize that she's slumped on her knees on the classroom floor.

Everything is coming back to her. Her vision, her thought's, hearing, everything. Cassie looks up at Patrick, wondering why he finally let her go. He's not looking at her, not paying attention as she cough's and suck's in huge gulp's of air. He's holding her necklace in one hand while the other is still holding the door closed. Her necklace is now broken and he's staring down at the ring laying in his palm. Patrick's eyes once again holding that confused look.

"Cassie! Cassie, are you okay?" She can hear Pete yelling through the door.

"Cassie, please!" Jon echoes. Patrick lifts his head and stares at the door for a long moment.

"I'm...I'm okay." Cassie wheezes out, her voice so rough and it hurt's to talk, hurt's to swallow, hurt's to even breath.

Patrick lowers his gaze to her and he's staring at her again. Their eyes locked together, his flickering with something she can't place but she can't look away. Patrick's hand curl's around the ring in his palm and without hesitation he's darting to a second door in the room, stopping to give Cassie a glance before he's gone through a door that was well hiden, a door that lead's to god knows where.

Cassie sits shell shocked for a long moment. Pete and Jon get the door open now that Patrick isn't holding it shut. They're inside the room in an instant, Jon kneeling down next to Cassie and Pete scanning the room, gun drawn.

"Are you okay?" Jon's asking, voice so full of concern and his brown eyes red rimmed. Cassie nods softly. His hand is on her shoulder, holding her up because suddenly she feels so weak. Jon's fingers also press close to her throat, soft, she can barely feel him. "He was...choking you?" It's not really a question but she can feel the anger in Jon's voice.

"He took my wedding ring..." Cassie swallows thickly, wincing at the pain in her throat.

"Where'd he go?" Pete asks, he looks back at her. His brown eyes so full of fear and agony, Cassie wonder's if her eyes look the same.

"Hidden door." She point's weakly toward's where Patrick managed to escape. She feels so lightheaded, so dizzy that she's afraid she's going to fall face first on the floor. Jon's hands are still on her and he's wrapping them around her so gently, pulling her so she's tight against his chest.

"Come on Pete. lets find the others." Jon says as he stands, lifting Cassie into his arms and cradling her close to him. "We're getting the fuck out of here." He demand's, heading out the door with Pete following behind him.

"Jon..." Cassie says voice so rough and broken. Jon looks down at her, her faded blue eyes locked on his brown. "I love you." She tells him, soft and simple before her eyes flutter closed, her hands clutching weakly in the fabric of his t-shirt.
*
Jon cannot believe this all happened. This mission was shit, it was horrible like he thought it would be. He and Pete travel back to the main floor, already finding Krissy and Ryan down there.

"Jon!" Krissy says alarm in her voice when she see's him carrying Cassie. The girl was passed out now, fine despite how she had nearly been killed. Krissy is up and racing to him, standing with frightened eyes. "What the fuck happened?" She asks, her blues eyes wide as she gazes down at Cassie's passed out form.

"She was attacked by Patrick."

"She...she found him?" Krissy question's, Jon nods. He's so angry, he couldn't protect her when she needed him, she nearly got killed and if she had..Jon doesn't even want to think about that.

"He tried to strangle her to death." The boy inform's her.

"Poor thing." Krissy mutters out, brushing her hand along Cassie's dark hair.

"Krissy, what the hell happened to Ryan?" Pete says from behind Jon and it's only then that Jon notices how Ryan isn't really moving. The thin, brown haired boy is laying stretched along the main floor, he looks..wet and his right hand is wrapped up in something. Krissy turn's back around to look at Ryan, Pete rushing forward to kneel next to the boy.

"A luno attacked us too. It got Ryan and dragged him underwater...we got him out but..." Krissy trails off, biting her lip like she doesn't want to finish the sentence.

"But what?" Jon asks, please, god he's just hoping that Ryan didn't get bit.

"It bit off two of his fingers." The voice of Brendon supplies from behind Jon. The older boy turn's, Cassie still in his arms, to see Brendon is coming down the stairs, but he's carrying someone too, Brendon is carrying a limp Joe. Pete gasps because of what happened to Ryan and Jon's gasping because Joe too? Just how many people got hurt this time?

Behind Brendon is William who has his arm wrapped around a crying Greta. The four of them come down the stairs, heading to where Ryan is still laying on the floor.

"Christ, what happened to Joe?" Pete's saying and it looks like he's torn between staying next to Ryan and going to check on Joe. Brendon moves Joe next to Ryan, laying the older boy down.

"You'll have to ask William and Greta about that." Brendon states, standing and moving back to where Jon is still standing holding the girl. He should put her down with the other's but he doesn't want to, doesn't even want to have her in the injured group. Instead Jon sit's down the the bottom of the steps, Cassie still cradled against him.

William and Greta come down the stairs, the boy glaring at Brendon's words.

"You say it like it's our fault Brendon." William says cooly.

"Well, Will, you are known for irrational behavior. Perhaps you thought Joe was a half breed too?" Brendon snipes.

"We were attacked too Brendon, Two luno's. William got the one and the other came after me." Greta explain's, her bright blue eyes filling with tears. "Joe stopped it, let me get away...but then it went after him and it slammed him hard against the locker's...he wasn't moving so-so I shot it...I just kept shooting till it was dead." The girl cries, obviously disturbed by the attack. Krissy moves forward and takes her hand, pulling her into a hug.

Brendon is looking at Jon now, at Cassie in his arms, seeing her as if for the first time.

"She was attacked?" Brendon question's, brown eyes wide. Jon nods, he really doesn't want to repeat what happened over and over again. The boy's nose crinkles. "She smell's just like a luno." He says.

"It was Patrick...he was the one." Jon fill's him in. Brendon looks stunned for a brief second.

"He was actually here?" Jon nods. "He didn't kill her though..." Brendon trail's off, it was something Jon had been wondering about too. Patrick had been so unlike himself, so ready to kill Cassie but then he just stopped...Jon was thinking that maybe Patrick remembered her? Maybe some old piece of him came back and he remembered that she was his wife, that he didn't want to hurt her. Than again, he's not sure if it even work's that way. If luno's from human's have the ability to remember things from their human lives.

Brendon seem's to be thinking the same thing but they don't know enough about the creatures to be sure. Gabe might know though, maybe Ryan.

"No one saw Jenny?" Krissy asks from her position next to Ryan.

"Only Patrick on our part." Jon says William and Greta don't even know who Jenny is so, even if they had seen her, they wouldn't say yes.

"A girl?" Greta asks, Brendon shakes his head.

"A girl luno." He corrects, William makes a little noise, everyone concious turning their attention to him.

"There was a female luno, in the room I busted open. She got away before they attacked though..I don't know where she went." William tells them.

"What'd she look like?" Jon is asking. William shrugs.

"Didn't really get a good look at her. Was a little worried about fighting the other one's."

It might've been Jenny, or maybe it was just a girl luno.

"We need to get back home." Brendon says, the other's nodding. "Pete, think you can carry Ryan?"

They ride back home in silence, Jon isn't sure whether or not to classify this mission as a success or not. The whole point was to see if Patrick and Jenny were at the school..they were so, maybe it's successful but at the same time, three out of nine of them got hurt. It's really more of a draw.

Pete is driving, Krissy and Greta in the front with him. The rest of them are in the back. Joe and Ryan laying in the bed. Jon still holding Cassie in his lap, he doesn't really feel like she'll be safe if he set's her down.

"She'll be okay you know?" Brendon tells Jon and the older boy nods. He does know because he won't accept it any other way, Cassie has to be alright, That's just the way things have to go.

*
Ryan wake's up feeling like he got hit by a truck. He doesn't really remember much about what happened in the basement. He knows that he was pulled underwater a lot, he remembers a lot of screaming and splashing and he remembers having five fingers when he left.

Now he has three fingers, his pointer, his middle and his thumb. The only plus to this is that he can still flip people off. Where his other two fingers should be, there's just bandages. White bandages wrapped from his palm down to his forearm. Ryan didn't know he was missing fingers until Andy told him. He freaked a bit, flailing about and cursing a lot. It's really weird to be missing fingers. He really want's to see his hand, what it looks like now but at the same time he's afraid, afraid to see his now disfigured body.

If Ryan tries really hard he can imagine he still has all his fingers.

Joe and Cassie are in the bed's next to him. Neither looks too bad so he's relieved. Joe has bandages wrapped around his forehead and Cassie has horrible dark bruises on her neck and what looks like on her wrist's, one's that almost matched the one's Jon had. Both of them are asleep so he can't really ask either of them what happened.

He's really kind of desperate to find out if anyone ran into Jenny or Patrick. Ryan is more than relieved when Brendon comes to check on him. The boy sit's beside his bed and eyes Ryan like he isn't sure what he should or shouldn't say. The older of the two boy's is practically bursting to ask about Jenny but he doesn't, he wait's to see what Brendon will tell him.

"How you feeling Ry?"

"Like I've lost fingers." Ryan deadpan's, Brendon smiles despite the subject matter.

"At least you've still got your middle." He point's out and Ryan nods.

"What happened to them?" Ryan asks, tilting his head toward's the other two injured in the room. Brendon's face take's on a grim look.

"Same thing that happened to you, attacked by luno's."

"Are they okay?"

Brendon nods. "For the most part yeah, Joe might have a bit of a concussion and Cassie got really fucking lucky, but they should both be fine." The younger boy reassures Ryan. Again Ryan is nodding, still trying to will himself to ask the question he really want's to ask.

"Did anyone...I mean...was she there?"

Brendon doesn't need more than that, he knows exactly who Ryan's talking about. The black haired boy is quiet for a moment and still, surveying Ryan before he shakes his head.

"No one saw her."

"Oh.." Ryan is trying not to be disappointed, it's probably better that the girl wasn't there, probably better that Ryan didn't see her.

"But Patrick was." Brendon add's seconds later. Ryan's soft brown eyes widen and he sit's up, wincing because he put too much pressure on his bad hand.

"You guys saw Patrick? I..what happened with him? Did-Did Cassie get to see him?" Ryan's words are rushing out. He can't believe they saw Patrick, that the boy was back and alive and moving. It's like one of those things that's too much to believe until you actually see it. Brendon is still looking somber.

"Patrick's the whole reason Cassie's in here." Ryan's face shows confusion. "He tried to kill her Ry." The boy explain's, The older boy's eyes going wider as he looks back at the passed out girl, the dark marks around her throat.

"He did?"

"Yeah, he was strangling her to death until he suddenly stopped."

Brendon wasn't lying, Cassie did get fucking lucky.

Ryan's heart is at his feet. That's not what he had been hoping would happen. He's not sure what he had been hoping, maybe that Jenny and Patrick would get one look at Cassie and himself and that they'd remember...that they'd come back. Maybe that was too hopeful, too much hope for a world like this.

Ryan is quiet after that and Brendon pat's him on the shoulder and leaves the room.

*
Joe wakes up to complete darkness. He can feel the sturdy bed beneath him and the steril smell of the infirmary, he knows that he's home. He can feel the bandages that are wrapped around his head and he curses the fact that Andy just had to wrap his eyes.

"Andy?" Joe says, he would normally just take the damn bandages off but he's hesistant this time, what if he's missing a piece of his skull or something? Joe hears a rustling noise but no one is anwsering him. "Andy!" He call's out again. This time he can hear footstep's entering the room.

"Joe? You're awake." Andy's voice issues through the room and he sound's relieved. "How do you feel?"

"Fine I guess. I mean, my head hurt's but I think I'll survive." Joe can feel a dull ache in the back of his head, a constant thump, thump, thump, like the beat to a song.

"That's good." Joe can hear Andy writing something down. "We were worried that you might slip into a coma." The doctor explains.

"Well, I'm okay but can you take the bandages off my eyes now?" Joe request's, he'd really like to be able to see again. Andy's silent for a moment before he laughs.

"Good one Joe."

Okay, that's weird, maybe he really is missing a piece of his head.

"Well, I get wrapping my head but my eyes? That's a little drastic don't you think?" Joe can hear more footsteps, they're closer to him and he can kinda sense Andy standing next to him.

"Joe...can you not see me?" Andy asks, a chill run's down Joe's body. He really is not appreciating this stupid fucking joke.

"Of course I can't. You put bandages over my eyes." Joe says flatly,annoyance clear in his voice.

"Joe...I don't have bandages over your eyes." Andy tells him and Joe feels his body go numb. He reaches up with a shaky hand and touches his eyes, he knows his eyes are open but he can't see anything, pure black like he's sitting in the dark. Sure enough, there is nothing over his eyes.

Joe's shaking now, he can't see...he can't fucking see. "Andy? Are you trying to say that I'm blind?"

*
Cassie had woken up a few hours ago in the infirmary. Ryan was gone but Joe was still passed out in his bed. Jon wasn't around either, no one was. She had laid there a few moment's, the last bit's of her concious memory coming back to her. How she had nearly died, how without looking she knew she had bruises, it was like she could still feel him there, his ice cold hand wrapped around her throat.

The girl shuddered and forced herself to forget about it, to push all thought's of Patrick and what had happened at the high school away. Cassie had gotten up and on wobbly leg's made it back to the bunk room, Jon already laying in his bunk. The sun is still up but it's low, like the night will fall soon.

Cassie sunk down in the bed behind Jon, her arms coming up to wrap around him. The boy makes a sleepy noise but doesn't wake up and the girl presses herself closer to him, ignoring the subtle burn in her throat.




Entry twenty-three: I Used To Waste My Time Dreaming Of Being Alive, Now I Only Waste It Dreaming Of You

The hideout was dark, everyone was asleep when he had crept into the house. His footsteps were whisper quiet, like a cat sneaking up on it's prey and speaking of prey, there she was, asleep in her bunk. The dark bruises he had left on her visible to him even in the dark. He smiles in the darkness, no one would be there to stop him now, no one could help her.

He creeps to the side of her bed and in a flash he's on top of her, pinning her to the bed. The girl's awake now and she manages to let out a scream just as he bites into the soft skin of her throat, silencing her for good.

Cassie wakes up to someone shaking her, her blue eyes fluttering open and her heart pounding like crazy. She's breathing hard and sweating, the dream she had just been having filling her mind with terror. Jon is still there, next to her and he's looking at her with wide worried eyes.

"Are you okay?" He's asking, his hand on her shoulder. Cassie's sweating and disoriented, she doesn't know where she is for a moment but Jon's hand is still on her, squeezing and holding, calming her down.

"I think so." She replies, pushing her sweat dampened bangs out of her eyes.

"You were screaming...and thrashing around." Jon tells her, his other hand moving to her chin, tipping her head up so their eyes meet.

"It was a nightmare...he was..he was trying to kill me...he did kill me." Cassie mutters out, she's still a little out of it, still trying to seperate her nightmare from the reality. She's afraid, like, Patrick might be standing beside the bed. Jon leans forward and kisses her on the forehead.

"It's okay, It wasn't real." He whispers against her skin and she nods, she knows it wasn't real but it felt like it and sitting here in the dark isn't what she want's to do.

"I'm going to go...shower." Cassie says as she scrambles off the bed.

"Cass, wait." Jon's following her but she doesn't mind, she just needed to get out of there, she really doesn't want to be alone. She clatter's up the stairs with no regard for the other's, her brain, her body is on fast forward and she's pretty sure she's having a panic attack.

Cassie makes it to the bathroom but she leaves the door open for Jon, she want's him to come in. Jon does come in, slips into the bathroom just as she's undoing her jean's, slipping them down her hips. Jon pushes the door closed, Cassie is still trying to get out of her jean's, struggling to get her shirt off and she can't and it's so frustrating. Not just the shirt but everything, every part of her life was a mess and she couldn't take it anymore.

"Cassie." Jon says, sound's worried as he moves forward and pulls her shirt off for her. His hands are on her shoulder's, it's not fair to him, it's not fair that he always has to pick her up when she fall's down, that she isn't strong enough to handle herself. "Just calm down O.K.?" He says and she nods, tears slipping from her eyes.

Jon moves away from her, moves to the bathtub and he's turning the water on. Cassie's still standing there in her bra and unbuttoned jean's. She's scared to look at herself in the bathroom mirror, she's scared but at the same time she want's to, she want's to see what Patrick did to her, what she did to herself. The girl does look in the mirror, her reflection one she barely recongizes, her eyes are tear stained, that she's familar with. The dark purple, near black bruises that decorate her throat in the shape of a strong hand, that's what's new.

Jon return's to her side and she can see him in the mirror too, standing beside her, his hands on her shoulder's and his gaze locked on her reflection. "Come on, take a shower, you'll feel better." He tells her, brown eyes so full of concern. She nods and allows Jon to help her undress, what does it matter if this is only the second time he's seen her naked and the first with light involved?

He doesn't make a move to try anything with her, she's not expecting him to. Cassie climb's into the shower and Jon is standing outside of it as the hot water beat's down on her, washing away all traces of the day off her skin.

"Jon," She says, "Join me." She just doesn't want to be alone, she want's him near her, with her. Jon nods and strip's off his clothes, climb's in the shower with her, stands under the warm water. The girl pushes up against him, just want's to stand here like this with him. His hands find her hips, he just hold's her as they both get soaked.

"I'm sorry I didn't listen to you." Cassie says moment's later, looking up at him through sheet's of wet hair. Jon brushes her soaked hair out of her face and shakes his head.

"I'm not upset, I know you did what you felt was right."

"I put myself in danger..I almost died...and it would've been my own fault if I had."

"Don't blame yourself Cassie, you're only human..." Cassie can't help but feel like Jon want's to add 'And Patrick isn't.' on to the end of that sentence.

"You don't deserve me Jon." Cassie tells him, her hands slip off of him and she looks down at their feet.

"What?" He sound's like that really is the last thing on his mind. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm not good enough for you." She says looking back up into his eyes. "I'm too weak, I depend on you too much...I'm always crying...always doing stupid shit...you deserve so much better than that." What Cassie really doesn't want to say is that she's afraid of him getting sick of her, of Jon giving up on her because of all her fault's.

"Cass," Jon says a few silent moment's later, tilting her chin up so she can look into his eyes. "When I asked you to let me take care of you I wasn't just saying it to get into your pants. I know who you are, I know what you're like and I meant it when I said I loved you."

Jon was too perfect, she didn't deserve him but he still wanted to stay and she still wanted him to.

The girl leans forward and rest's her head on his chest, trying to find his steady heartbeat admist all the water droplets thumping off their skin.

"You know what I was thinking about when Patrick was strangling me?" She says, Jon swallows thickly and she can feel the boy's heart picking up.

"What?" His voice is breathless.

"I was thinking about how I'd never see you again, that you'd have to listen to me die...that I never got to tell you that I loved you." Jon's fingers tangle gently in her hair, she remembers telling him that she loved him before she passed out, she hopes he knows that she meant it. "You know I mean it right?" She add's, staring up at him.

"I love you too and I know you mean it." Jon anwsers her, wraps his arms around her and hold's her close. Cassie's arms go around Jon's neck, her face close to his ear.

"I want to be stronger for you. I'm sick of crying, I'm tired of running. I want to take care of you too, just like you take care of me." Cassie whispers into his ear before she kisses him.

"I already think you're strong." Jon tells her, just the slightest of smile's on his face. Cassie shakes her head.

"No, I'm not. The other girl's...they don't break down like I do...they're not as weak as I am."

"Like who?" Jon asks, Cassie looks up at him.

"Krissy..Jenny, when she was still around..Greta..they don't lose their shit like I do." It was pretty much the truth, in all her year's of knowing Krissy, the girl rarely showed her emotion's to anyone but Brendon. Jenny was like that too, hiding her feeling's away from people, even Cassie though the older girl did have a knack for knowing when her best friend was doing that paticular act. The point was they were obviously stronger than she was.

"The other's haven't gone through what you have." Jon argues, that she's not sure about. Everyone was in on this together, everyone had to go through the semi-end of the world so why was she any different? Cassie figures that Jon is referring to Patrick, to the fact that Krissy still has Brendon and that he's never tried to kill her.

"I think if what happened to you last morning, happened to her...I think even Krissy would cry." Jon is insisting, like he's trying to make her feel better, justify her crying, maybe Cassie was just being hard on herself. "Listen, I don't want you to become emotionally dead, I want to know what you're feeling. Our feeling's are pretty much what make us human, what seperates us from the luno's and lets us know that we're alive. I don't want you to lose that."

Jon smiles and grab's for the shampoo, confident that his words had eased the girl he so desperately loves, mind. Cassie still feels like he deserves someone so much greater than her.

*
Jack is sitting in his room, the safe room. He doesn't know where Ruby is, he doesn't care at the moment. He's sitting on his bed, the whole place smell's like human's and human blood, it's really a tease, smelling them and they're not actually there. Jack's own hands smell like that girl and it's driving him crazy.

Noah had yelled at him for five minutes straight because he hadn't killed the three human's that were on the floor he was watching over. Jack couldn't pay attention to the yelling, he couldn't pay attention to anything, just the black jewled ring clenched tight in his hand.

That's what he was doing now, studying the ring, rolling it in his fingers. He honestly doesn't know why he couldn't kill the girl, why he had suddenly stopped. The ring was part of what made him stop but it wasn't just the jewerly. Every moment he spent with that human triggered something. The way she looked at him, her voice, she had been calling him that name...Patrick...Jack didn't know who Patrick was, didn't know who the girl was beyond the fact that her name was Cassie.

He didn't and it was driving him crazy.

But the whole time he was in there, every time she called him Patrick he would have flashes, like his dreams but quicker. Jack's trying desperately to remember these flashes, trying to recall the images that popped into his head. A voice that sounded like that girl's but he couldn't be sure. A warmth that filled him with an unbridled sense of happiness, something he had never felt before. He had gotten flashes of a love that was so much stronger than the 'love' he felt for Ruby, it was all very confusing.

And that guy, the guy that was so desperate to get to the girl..his words had triggered flashes in Jack's mind too. The one thing that stuck with him was: "Patrick, you told me to not let anything happen to her. You made me promise. You would never hurt Cassie...please!" Those words had defintly sparked something, a bright light in a high room, a guy with brown eyes who promised with all his heart and a sense of relief.

The only problem was that Jack didn't know who Patrick was, or Cassie..he knows that that was the girl he was attempting to kill. "Cassie.." He repeat's the name over and over again, it sound's familar in his mouth and he's wanting it to spark something else, to give him a piece of something.

Jack can't remember anything before waking up here at this luno den, the one made out of an old high school. Ruby was already here, Ruby was there to take care of him and she did. Everything before he woke up here is a blank, foggy white and scribbled out of his mind. He tried to ask Noah about it, ask him about where they found him, how they saved him and why he was all alone. Noah never gave anwser's though. "That's not important Jack." That's what he'd say.

Another memory comes back to Jack, one from the fight with the human's that morning. When he had asked that girl, Cassie, when he had asked her why they had came here..she had said it was for him..to find him..to find Patrick. A terrfiying thought strikes Jack, what if he is this Patrick? What if that's where he was before Noah and the other's found him? Jack's mind is racing, what if this was the anwser that had been plauging him all along?

Suddenly the door open's and a familar figure pour's into the room. It's Ruby, staring at him with her crimson eyes, she doesn't look happy to see him but at the same time she doesn't look upset at him either. She moves to her bed, which is right next to his and sit's down, still staring at him.

"Noah is really upset with you Jack." Ruby says, her voice is even if not a little dark.

Jack shrugs, "I already apologized for not finishing them off..what more can I do?" He says, it's not really a question, his eyes are still trained on the ring.

"Why couldn't you kill them?" She's asking, now she sound's a little upset. Jack meet's with her crimson gaze.

"Why didn't you kill the one's on your floor?" He snap's back, at least Jack had tried to take out one of them unlike Ruby who fled from her floor. She makes a face at him.

"Sam told me to run."

"And now Sam's dead." Jack says cooly. He's looking back down at the ring, still trying to figure it all out.

"What are you looking at?" Ruby asks, standing and moving to see what Jack see's. She see's the ring and scoff's. "What the hell is that?"

"I got it off one of the human's.." Jack explains, Ruby eyes the ring with interest as she sinks down on the bed infront of Jack. Her hands slide up over his, pale clawed fingers barely ghosting over the cold metal of the ring.

"It's pretty.." She says and Jack nods, it is nice to look at no doubt about it. It's also really comforting to him for some reason he can't explain. "Can I have it?" Ruby asks, staring up at Jack with sparkling eyes. He doesn't know what to say, he knows that this ring, this stupid piece of shiny metal shouldn't matter to him but it does, he also knows that he can't tell Ruby that.

Like him Ruby doesn't remember anything from before she woke up here but unlike him she doesn't ever have flashes of things, strange broken pieces of maybe memories, or dreams, she doesn't have any of those things and they both know that Jack isn't supposed to have them either. When he first started having those strange dreams Jack had went to Noah, asked him about it and Noah told him that it was all a figment of his imagination, that he shouldn't think too much about it and that he definitly shouldn't tell anyone else that he was having these thoughts, these dreams.

Ruby is the only one who does know that he has dreams but she doesn't think anything of it, she doesn't think that maybe the reason they can't remember anything before they got here is because they weren't who they are now, maybe they were different?

Ruby is still staring at Jack and she makes a small noise that pulls him from his thought's. He looks at her and she's looking at him expectantly, he knows that she'll find it suspicious if he want's to keep the ring so he just nods.

"Yeah, sure." Jack says and lets her slip the ring, still hanging on it's broken silver chain, from his finger's pushing it up on her own instead. Ruby leans forward and kisses Jack lightly on the lips, the ring glittering on her finger. She settles down next to him, talking but Jack isn't listening. He can't focus on her because his mind is wrapped up on one person and one person alone.

Jack has to find this Patrick person.



Entry twenty four: Love Will Tear Us Apart Again

Andy knew that the mission to the old high school, three day's ago was a terrible idea, he knew and he let his friend's go anyway. It's not like they would listen to him even if he did say something, this group of people are so stubborn that they rarely listen to anyone who tells them 'no'. At least it wasn't as bad as his imagination had lead him to believe it would be.

Andy was actually sleeping in today, Ryland having told him that he would be more than happy to take over for Andy. The older doctor was glad because he hadn't had a break in a long time, it was horribly tiring to be the doctor here, both emotionally and physically. He didn't sleep well because he was worried about his patient's, he couldn't rest because he was worried about his friend's.

All in all he's having trouble trying to decide who got off worse on their last mission, Joe or Ryan? Andy is leaning toward's Joe because sure, yeah, Ryan lost some finger's but at least he can still see, he can still see his friend's and himself and the house and the world in general, even if the world wasn't much to see nowadays.

By now everyone knew about what had happened to everyone else. Cassie felt extreamly bad about what had happened, blaming herself and her insistance to go to the school. Ryan and Joe told her that they didn't blame her but the look she held in her eyes, he knew that she was still blaming herself.

Ryan was healed enough that he could unwrap the bandages from his hands, Andy did it just the two of them. He saw Ryan's hand when he first came in, he knew it wasn't pretty. The boy's pinky and ring finger had been bitten clean off, just the small, almost flat bump's, almost like the finger's were never there at all.

Ryan cried when he first saw the flat skin where his fingers used to be, Andy didn't blame him, if it was him he probably would've too. The younger boy has since taken to wearing gloves, not willing to let anyone see his disfigured hand. At least Ryan was handling the injury well, a sort of silent strength, though he has yet to attempt to do anything with his right hand. Andy didn't quite have the heart to tell him that he'd eventually have to relearn to do everything that he used to be able to do.

Joe wasn't handling his injury very well. Andy had honestly thought Joe was just kidding when he said he couldn't see. He quickly realized that his best friend wasn't joking, that Joe really couldn't see. Andy blamed the blindness on the fact that Joe had taken such a hard hit to the head, wrecking his nerve endings and taking away his sight.

Joe was angry, Joe screamed until his voice was shot, Joe wanted to throw chair's but he couldn't see them to throw them. He was upset and he had every right to be. Maybe it wasn't so hard to be blind in the old world, back when luno's didn't exist but now, in this new world..there wasn't much a blind person could do. Joe wouldn't be able to fight the luno's anymore, he wouldn't be able to go on supply run's or work on the van.

"I'm useless..." Joe had growled out, he was crying too but Andy would never tell anyone that. It was scary, how his dark eyes were open, looked normal but they were useless, like Joe thought he was.

"You're not." Andy had tried to reason, tried to explain to Joe that he was still the same person, that he was still Joe. The curly haired boy shook his head.

Cassie had come out with more emotional damage than physical. Sure, she couldn't talk well and she said that it hurt to swallow but she was alright for the most part, mentally was a different story. Jon had come to Andy and told him that the girl now had nightmares on a nearly nightly basis. She was also a lot quieter now, Andy had caught her many time's just standing somewhere, staring out windows or off into space, trapped in her own head.

Andy sighs and shift's in his bunk, more than happy to let someone else take care of everyone for once.

*
Joe is pretty sure that he's sitting in the living room. At least he thinks that's where he's still sitting. Ryland had led him in here nearly an hour ago and he hadn't moved since, sitting in the dark silence. It wasn't that people were avoiding him, that wasn't the case, Joe just didn't know what to do now.

All the things he would normally do were now impossible for him. He didn't want to bother anyone to lead him around. He didn't want to be a burden to anyone so, he just sat in silence in what he hopes is the living room, listening to the people around him.

Right now Joe can hear footstep's above him, the people upstairs. He can hear people in the kitchen, Ryan whose talking to Brendon and swearing, probably because he can't do something with his now deformed hand. Joe hears more footstep's and they sound close to him, it put's him on edge that he can't see the person approaching him.

"Hey, Joe." It's Pete, the older boy's voice surrounding him.

"Hey."

More footstep's and Joe feels the battered couch dip with the new weight of Pete sitting down next to him.

"How ya feeling?"

"Honestly, bored out of my mind." Joe admits, it's true, there's nothing he can do now. His life is consisting of sitting in darkness. Pete gives a little laugh, his hand finds Joe's shoulder.

"Well, Gabe told me to tell you that you can help him upstairs, with the faxing and stuff like that."

Joe sighs, tip's his head back against the couch. "So, this is what his life has come down to? Pity tasks? Pete, I don't know if I can spend the rest of my life like this." Joe says softly, deadly serious. Pete is silent next to him, Joe only knows that he's still there because of his light breathing.

"Joe..." Now Pete's sounding worried.

"I'm serious, condemned to a life of darkness, not to mention I'm completely useless around here...I might as well be luno chow."

"That's not funny Joe." Pete chides, he knows that, he knows that death is no joke. "There's stuff you can do." He add's. "Like, I said, Gabe will teach you how to run the fax machine, you can still help fix the truck...all you have to do is explain it to Jon and Andy."

"I guess." Joe doesn't actually sound like he believes that those option's are so great.

"Just...don't give up..okay Joe?"

"Right."

Joe knows that he isn't the only person whose suffering, the only one whose hurting but this, this just feels like too much. He's never felt more alone than he does now, stuck and isolated in his own dark little world. No one can understand because no one is here with him, he's surrounded by people yet, he feels so alone.

Pete clap's him on the shoulder before Joe can feel him get up. "I'll go tell Gabe that you'll help him from now on." The older boy says, even though Joe didn't exactly agree to it. Joe nods, doesn't know if Pete's even in the same room anymore. Footstep's heading away from him, toward's the exit of the room before they stop. "I won't let you become useless Joe, I promise."

Pete leaves and Joe sit's alone on the couch once again, contemplating the new option's in his life. He finds it interesting that it's true that once you lose your sight, your hearing and smelling pick's itself up, increases to make up for the sudden lack of vision. Joe can hear better than he ever could, the smelling he didn't notice too much, he wasn't like Brendon, he didn't have any kind of superhuman abilities, he was just a blind guy on a couch.

He had been expecting Pete to come back down and talk to him but after five minutes he was still sitting alone in the dark. Joe was quickly growing bored, didn't want to sit here anymore. He wanted to help fix the truck, like he had been doing everyday for the last month or so, maybe like, Pete said he could go stand in the garage and instruct them.

Joe decides to get up, pressing his hands on the couch and pushing himself up. He's not willing to ask anyone for help, he didn't even want Ryland to help him come in here. He stands and it's not hard, it's not like he can't walk anymore, he remembers the hideout's layout from memory. Joe take's a few steps forward, his hands out in case he bump's into something.

He figures he makes it a good distance through the room before he bump's into something, something small and square, hitting sharp against his ankle and tripping him causing him to fall to the dirty wooden ground with a hard thump.

Joe's laying sprawled out on the floor, wondering what he had tripped on and feeling more than foolish, feeling completely helpless. The boy's hands ball into fist's as he slam's them against the wooden floor. "Goddamit!" He scream's out, "Damn it...damn it!" He's gritting his teeth as he repeatedly strikes the floor, it's almost like a relife, him getting his frustration's out. Honestly, he feels stupid, like a little kid who can't do anything for himself.

Suddenly there are more footstep's, light this time so, Joe figure's it's a girl. Probably Cassie coming back to check on him and apologize for the hundreth time, blaming herself for Joe's incident.

"Joe?" It is a girl, a soft voiced girl but it's not Cassie, it's Greta. She sound's worried and she probably is, staring at him as he lay's dumbly on the floor. "Are-are you alright?" He can hear her footstep's again and he can feel her drop down next to him.

"Greta?" He says softly, face turned and pressed against the floor.

"Yeah, what happened Joe?" Again she sound's worried.

"I was trying to get out of this fucking room..I tripped on something, I guess."

"There's a stool..." She tells him.

"Of course there'd be a fucking stool." The boy mumbles out.

"Here, let me help you Joe." Greta says, he want's to protest but really he knows that he does need her help. Joe nods and sit's up, Greta's hands on his arms and she's tugging him back up to his feet. Once Joe's standing he closes his eyes to avoid giving the girl his now vacant stare. She's still got her hands on his arms, holding him steady. "Did you want to leave the room?" She asks, Joe thinks about it, doesn't want to make her lead him all through the house. He shake's his head.

"Back to the couch would be good."

He can almost hear Greta smiling as she lead's him back to the beaten up couch. She settle's Joe back down on the couch and he feels the couch dip like it did with Pete, Greta smell's better though. She's not making any noise, not saying anything and he doesn't even know if she's looking at him, overall this is very frustrating. "You still there?" Joe half joke's, maybe she got away from him without him noticing.

"Yeah..sorry." She starts, again she sound's nervous but Joe doesn't know why, maybe she's just freaked out by his newly acquired blindness. "It's just that...I wanted to apologize for what happened to you." The blonde girl tells him. Joe is taken aback by that, why should she be apologizing? It's not her fault.

"I'm confused."

"What happened to you is my fault Joe. Because I ran away instead of helping you and when I did...I was too late." Greta sound's sad when she says this, Joe doesn't understand why she blame's herself, he certainly doesn't blame her.

"Greta..don't blame yourself alright? What happened is no one's fault but mine, I made the choice to get involved, not you but me." He's trying to reasure her, he really does place no blame on the blonde girl, all his anger and resentment is balanced nicely at himself and the luno bastard who did this to him.

"But if I had done something-"

"You did do something Greta. You killed that luno before it killed me, you saved me..you did something."

"I guess, but I still feel like you're blind because of me." She sound's entirely too guilty, Joe doesn't like that. Joe want's to reach out a hand and touch her but without his sight, he's kind of afraid that he might accidently grope her. He laughs a bit, again tilt's his head back against the couch, he can smell her again, Greta kind of smell's like coffee and flower's.

"No, I think that I should thank you."

"Why?" The girl asks, sounding like she doesn't think she has any reason to be thanked.

"Because you were the last thing I saw before my vision went." Joe tells her, seriously, he could've seen much worse things as his last image beside's Greta's beautiful face.

Joe turn's to face her voice, want's to open his eyes but he's afraid that it's too creepy looking so, he just tip's his head down blinded eyes focusing on the couch.

"Oh." She says, her voice is light, void of emotion. Joe's face fall's.

"I didn't mean anything by that." He doesn't need William running around trying to knock him downstairs or sacrifice him to luno's, for messing with his girlfriend.

Greta laughs, soft lik,e the wind. "No, it's okay...it was sweet." Joe grins because he thinks that she might be doing the same. "But, I still feel bad for what happened so, how about I help you around the house today?" She asks, her hand is on his shoulder, light and warm and Joe's smiling even if she isn't.

"Yeah, yeah, that'd be nice."

*

Ryan is curled up in his bunk when Cassie finds him. His hand has been bothering him all day so he's taken to trying to sleep off the pain, finding it unsuccessful.

"Hey Ry," She says, edging into the room carefully and stopping a little way's away from his bunk. "Brendon told me you were looking for me?" She asks, Ryan stop's and thinks, he had been looking for her a good hour ago but hadn't really been able to find her.

"Yeah, I wanted to talk to you." He tells her, she nods and move's forward, taking a seat on the end of his bed. Ryan's eyes are instantly drawn to the dark purple marks on her skin, stark against the pale line of her neck. She doesn't notice him staring at her bruises, she's far too busy staring at his gloved hand.

"About what?" She lifts her dim blue eyes to meet his. Ryan swallows thickly, he doesn't know how to broach the subject, how to ask her about what had happened to her at the school. He hadn't gotten the chance to talk to her about what happened yet.

"About you seeing Patrick again."

"Oh," She looks away from him, wrings her hands together. Ryan's not stupid, he's noticed how she seems different since that mission.

"If it's too hard..." Ryan starts he doesn't want to upset her further than she already is. Cassie shakes her head.

"No, what-what did you want to talk about?"

Ryan leans forward a bit, meets her eyes again.

"What was it like seeing him again?" Ryan's voice whispers out. He couldn't stop the question, it was one that plauged his own mind on an endless loop, what would it be like to see Jenny again? Ryan needed to know what it felt like. Cassie is still staring at him but her eyes seem heavy and far away, Ryan isn't expecting her to be able to anwser.

"It...it was like everything I wanted so badly," She starts, her voice is just as heavy as her eyes were. "But at the same time...it was the worst experience of my life." Ryan's taken aback by her anwser, how could it be bad? How could seeing someone she loved so intensely be a bad thing? He knows that it's because Patrick had attacked her but still, it was Patrick.

"He didn't recognise you?"

Cassie shakes her head. "I called him by his name and he didn't even know who Patrick was...he doesn't know who he is or who I am."

"I'm sorry." Ryan says, he wants to reach out and touch her, he almost does but then he remembers his hand and he doesn't do anything at all. She shakes her head, brown hair fluttering with the movement. "I hear no one saw Jenny." He adds, he figures she already knows this.

"There was a girl luno there but...William and Greta didn't know what Jenny looked like so...they didn't know if she was there or not." Cassie informs the boy. Ryan perks up, his eyes widening in surprise, no one had bothered to tell him that.

"So, she could be there still?" He asks, his voice is overly eager but he can't help it, despite all the warnings, despite what happened to Cassie, he couldn't let it go, he still had the urge to see his dead girlfriend again. Cassie looks at him and nods, curiousity in her eyes.

"I guess but Ryan..I don't think it's smart to go and try to find her."

"What? But we found them Cassie! We found where they are and I know this last time didn't go well but next time we'll be more prepared." He tells her, he's sounding too eager. Cassie's eyes widen.

"Next time?" She asks, "Ryan, there's not going to be a next time. No one is going to risk going back there again." Her voice is calm as she stares at Ryan with determined eyes.

"But she's there...she's there Cassie and I-"

"For god sakes! Look at what happened Ryan, why would any of us go back?" Her voice is rising now, she's close to getting mad now but Ryan doesn't understand why, he thought she'd be happy about this.

"Because the people we love are there Cassie!" Ryan is staring at her with unbelieving eyes, like, he can't understand why she's arguing with him.

The dark haired girl scoffs. "Ryan, they're not the same as they were! They don't remember us at all! Patrick tried to fucking kill me! What about this situation do you not understand? Do you honestly think Jenny would be any different?"

Ryan narrows his eyes. "We have to try Cassie, what if they can come back? What if they can be like Brendon?"

Cassie laughs but it comes out disbelieving, almost hysterical. "Look at us Ryan! I almost died! I was sure I was going to...and look at you...take your stupid glove off and then tell me that you want to go back and try again!" Now he's hit a nerve for the girl and now she's yelling. It's normal, they do it all the time, differentiating between yelling at each other and agreeing with each other, lately it seem's there is no middle ground.

"I can't accept that Cassie, I just can't. I have to see her again, I have to." Ryan isn't giving up, he's determined to see the girl he loved, still loves so immensly. Cassie is breathing hard, staring at Ryan with hard blue eyes, the marks rising and falling and even that isn't enough to deter Ryan from his goal to see the girl again.

"Fine, but you do it without me. I love Jenny, she was my best friend and I will always love her but the Jenny who exists now is not the same girl you met in high school...she's not the girl we knew. She'll kill you if she gets the chance Ryan."

Ryan sets his jaw, his eyes locked with the girl.

"There's no one else's hand I'd rather die by."

Cassie rolls her eyes and it seems she's had enough of this conversation, maybe she knows that what she says won't change his mind. Maybe she knows this because she was the same way. Seeing Patrick and Jenny again, seeing them is something you can't believe until you actually see it, until you're actually there. The same goes for whether or not they'll remember you, Ryan won't believe it until he see's it with his own two eyes.



Entry twenty five: Change Will Come

Krissy is only mildly surprised to see Cassie walk into the kitchen while she's midway through opening the floorboard to get out a bottle of liquor that they keep hidden away. So, she maybe made a promise to Brendon but a few sips wouldn't hurt right? Just enough to ease her bustling mind and allow her some sleep.

Krissy isn't surprised but Cassie is. "Kris," She starts, "What are you doing?" The slightly older girl asks as she stops in the middle of the kitchen, big blue eyes peering at her friend. Krissy gives a little shrug but doesn't stop her actions.

"Needed it to try and sleep." She replies, her usually light voice void of emotion. Daylight was nearing and within a few hours it would be when most, if not all of them headed to bed. Some of them were already asleep, Greta and William, Alex and a few others like to turn in early. Others, like Krissy, Cassie, and Pete had a tendency to stay up later than what was advisable.

Krissy is staring at Cassie, not at the marks on her neck like everyone else but just staring at the girl in general. She hadn't realized how long it had been since she's seen Cassie without Jon by her side. Maybe it's been equally as long that Cassie hasn't seen Krissy without Brendon.

"Ah, mind if I join you?" The older girl asks, Krissy grins and reaches in the small hole for the bottle.

"Not at all."

Cassie comes to sit next to Krissy on the floor, her knees drawn up to her chest. The blonde girl gets the liquor bottle out, uncorks it and promptly takes a swig from the bottle, making at face at how strong it is, the blonde girl coughs and passes it off to Cassie.

"So, not that I mind your company but why are you still awake?" Krissy asks the dark haired girl. Cassie takes her own swig of the alcohol, twisted face included and passes it back to the younger girl before she bothers to anwser.

"I have a lot on my mind."

That didn't seem like such an abnormal thing considering everyone has a lot of things on their minds as of late. She knows that it can all become too much, the situation, the luno's, the people, it can all drive you insane if you think about it too much.

"Where's Jon?" Jon was good at talking Cassie down, at making her feel like life could in fact be bearable. A little smile plays on the other girl's face as she thinks of Jon, her blue eyes warming.

"He went to sleep, I didn't want to disturb him." Cassie anwsers, they take turns sipping out of the bottle, passing the brown glass back and forth. "Where's Brendon?" The girl asks, Krissy crinkles her forehead in thought.

"Same." She says, it's true that Brendon was sleeping, he had been in a foul mood since they returned from the mission at the school, a mission he labled a failure. Though to Brendon, a mission was only a success if no one managed to get hurt, needless to say they didn't have a lot of successes.

Cassie tilts her head back against the wooden counter behind them, the marks on her neck illuminating. Krissy thinks that it must be hard for her, to carry her burdens right there on her body.

"Apparently Ryan has a deathwish." The older girl states, turning her head to meet Krissy's eyes. The younger girl raises an eyebrow.

"Pardon?"

Cassie takes another swig of the alcohol. "He's all desperate to go back to the school to find Jenny...even after I told him about what happened when I saw Patrick."

Krissy shrugs. "He loves her, he wants to see her again. You felt the same about Patrick a few days ago."

"I still love Patrick, Krissy." Cassie clarifies for the other girl, whether or not the older girl love's Patrick is something that should never be questioned.

"I know, I know that you still love him. All I'm saying is remember how you wouldn't take no for an anwser about seeing Patrick again? Nothing could convince you it was a bad idea because your heart so desperately wanted to see him again. It was only too late when your brain decided to play catch up."

"I got lucky. What if Ryan doesn't?"

Krissy sighs. "I don't think we can stop him. If he's willing to risk his life to see her again..that's his porogative....what do you think Jenny would say about all this?" The blonde asks, Cassie drops her head to her chest and again she's smiling a sad smile.

"She'd say that she wasn't worth it, she wouldn't want Ryan to go." Cassie responds, smiling fondly at the thought of her best friend.

"That sounds like Jenny." Krissy laughs lightly, it's been such a long time since anyones laughed that the whole concept almost feels foreign. Again Cassie has her head tipped back against the counter.

"I miss her Krissy."

"I know." Those two had been inseperable in life, it was only natural that one of them would suffer upon the others death.

"I miss her but the human version of her, not this horrible luno manifestation. Human Jenny, that's who I want to remember, not the beast that's going to try to kill me. It's a complete joke because you think; 'Oh they're back! We can be just like we used to but you can't...you can't ever go back...dead people can't come back..their bodies might be back but they aren't."

Krissy sets the bottle aside and rests her hand on her friend's knee, trying to comfort the older girl because that's what she does for her lately. Cassie lets out a ragged sigh but she's not crying. Come to think of it she hasn't seen Cassie cry in awhile.

"You can cry if you want."Krissy tells her, she's thinking about picking the bottle back up but she's feeling just the right amount of numbness to make this night liveable. Cassie lowers her head, hair covering her face, Krissy can't see her eyes but she knows that the other girl isn't crying.

*

Greta's been helping Joe since last night. Right now the two of them are in the kitchen, she's sitting beside him at the worn out table. Joe is eating, on his own because he didn't want her to feed him. She's glad for that because that little event would look overly affectionate. She's long since told William that she would be helping Joe out from now on. William didn't seem to like the idea but he let her do it, Greta hopes that he realizes that he's been holding her back too much.

Everyone else in the house has gone about doing their own business. Andy and Jon are trying to fix the van. A task made that much harder without Joe. Pete has come in to take Joe's place but really, Pete's not much of a mechanic. Greta thinks that Cassie and Krissy are upstairs with Alex and Gabe. As for everyone else, she's not sure but she knows that they're somewhere in the house.

So, maybe that's why it's so surprising when someone knocks on the front door.

It's like time freezes, ice cold and the house goes silent. Joe's head whips around and Greta slides her hand to his wrist. She hasn't been here long but she's been around long enough to know that no one knocks on doors anymore.

Brendon comes out from one of the backrooms, eyes narrowed as he stares at the door. The others have come around too, Ryan, Pete, anyone who calls the worn house a home. Brendon is the one who goes to the door, always the one who takes the front line because he can.

Greta scans around for Cassie and Krissy, finds them tucked back by the staircase. William is staring at her from just outside the kitchen.

"Luno's don't knock nowadays do they?" Brendon asks, his vauge attempt at a joke.

"Do you think we should answer it?" Ryan asks, his black gloved fingers digging into the fabric of his jeans. Brendon nods, black bangs slipping into his eyes.



















http://p-userpic.livejournal.com/56938952/3715385
panic

krissy kaiser
412 oak ridge hall
810 university drive
eau claire, WI
54701-6194

http://i228.photobucket.com/albums/ee245/AngelMisuzu/rmcapocolypsebanner.jpg


Comments (0)