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Female
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• a nightmare
Member Since
• 2005-07-27
Occupation
• student
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• does it really matter?
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• ummm . . .
Anime Fan Since
• i saw Spirited Away
Favorite Anime
• Trinity Blood, Fullmetal Alchemist, and anything by YuuWatase, and much much more
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• to write and publish a book
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• drawing, reading writing, daydreaming, hanging out with friends, playing my violin
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• umm . . . i play the violin?
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Tuesday, February 6, 2007
Sigh...
You all can just ignore this, i just need to type something out. Life is so hard, and i have no idea why. There's nothing really horrible happening that affects me directly... 'tis just... me. I swear, i'm depressed or bipolar or something. The world is blowing up in my face and all i can do is try to was away the reckage with my tears. but ugh, what is wring with me!? I almost cried in Bunny's car today as he was giving me a ried home, and lil' foamy was all sad for a little bit, but i didn't want her to be sad and... I talked to my mom on saturday, while we were on vacation no less she wants me to see someone, but i don't want to go tell a tranger my porblems. That's another thing. The two people i trust most have their own prblems to worry about, so i feel so guilty about talking to them. If i make all my emotions pblic than it'll seem like a ploy for attention. Sometimes i think i'm cursed with apathy... my friends go through hard times, they go see doctors, and suddenly i feel like this. I've gotten into these moods before, it started about a year ago, but not this bad and not for this long... i'm reallt sorry, i just need to get it out. And seeing that those who read this most likely don't know me personaly, our relationship won't really change. And my heaaches and dizzy spells are coming back with a vengence. They got better after i stopped eating meat, but they're back and worse. I can't go 24 hours without getting a headache, and i experience a whole new sensation with the dizzy spells along with those that i had before. And then there's school. I have no life, just homework. But what do you expect with 3 AP classes? Sigh. I feel like i'm being replaced with my friends. I'm withdrawn because i don't want to be annoying, but those i grew close with i'm now growing farther from, and they don't seem to notice. i swear if i just disapeared only a fraction of my "friends" would care. I have to g now, before i type a freaking 20 page essay on this. I just... neede to get it out...
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