Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Hello ^^

Awww..... I talked to him today at the school. Very first time. First, he was going to come to talk to me, and I saw he tried. Hes just too shy. Then, just before the 5th class, he sent me text message "Fuck, I was so close to you but them my voice got locked OH SHIT" Well. He tried on the break again. Well our 6th class started, and I decided that I go talkt to HIM if he was too shy. It came true: When the class was over, I went to the bus stop, and he was there standing. Well I didnt have any other choice but to talk to him. Well I went to him and said "Okay. Well Im gonna start this convertation then" and it went greate! He was so cool and fun and things ^^ Yay! I sound like a child! Well then the taxi arrived and I had to leave -_-;; Dammit. Oh well. Im gonna see him tomorrow at school. Wish me luck, peoples.... Im going now.... I got things to do. So see you. ^^ Have a fun week.



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Tuesday, April 12, 2005

^///^

Hes so DAMN cute!!

Omg Omg Omg he told me that he had fine day because he saw me ^////^ Thats so cute. He said hes too shy to come to talk to me at school *sigh* Why girls have to do everything! In finland it is like that, its good if guys even look at girls without blushing, really! *murmurs something* Oh well I had a BAD day but he so cheered me up again ^^ He said he will come to talk to me tomorrow. If he isnt too shy. Hope he isnt O__o Waite, Im only talking aboute him.... Remember Christian, Remember Christian....
Angelica: Why the hell do you try to remember Christian!? C'mon, you have change to live, you have a goth guy right here, do it girl!!
Me: And if hes like all my Ex-guyfriends...?
Milessanne: He isnt like them!! You have saw it yourselfs, I mean you are so alike and if hes like you, he cant be like all the others!
Angelica: Yeah!!
Me: Gess your right....

We really had convertation like that.... -_-;;; Hmm. O' well. I got to go..... I had to text message to him.... Again.... ^^;; Whaaat? AWW! He told me Im cute ^///^ Whats wrong with me!? *hits her head on the wall* *breaths deep* Im calm..... just calm..... Phew. Im going before he messages to me again. O___O See ya!




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Sunday, April 10, 2005

Hello peeps

Hes so CUTE!!!!

He likes me. I can tell. Yesterdaynight he tried to make up something so I wouldnt have to give my moms cellphone back to her (I was text messaging with it ^^;;) And finally mom fell asleep and We text messaged each other till it was 2 o'clock at night. Hes nice. But we're gonna be just a friend. Even if theres lotta things why we are alike. We're shy, loners, artists, quiet ones, dangerous when we're angry, we like coffee, we're both goths, we're both bit of lonely and ALOT more ^.^ Im happy that theres someone whos so much like me! We're gonna be GOOD friends. Thats for sure. Well I gotta go, I gotta go message him again ^^ So. Have fun. I wont forget aboute you peeps, Im just having hurry week. So see ya later!

But hey, think aboute it! EVERYONE in our school hates me, at least I think so because they talk like they dont.... Now I know it isnt true! ^^ By the way, thanks for my friend who started it. She first messaged to him from my cellphone, I grabbed the cellphone back and continued.... -_-;;;; Im glad I did. Well. Sayonara, I love you peoples! ^^





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Saturday, April 9, 2005

Hello...

O___O

HE TALKS TO ME!!!!

Im meaning that goth guy I was talking aboute: Hes SO cool! Hes so cool and CUTE! ^.^ AWWW Im so happy! He doesent hate me! He doesent hate me!!! YES!! ^^ Hes so cool. Just cool. So cool. He said he has beated 5 guys in our school. Yay, I got a bodyguard. ^^


^.^ I want those!! Arent they just cool? Okay well I really got nothing to say. Todaymorning, I was depressed like hell, but Im not gonna think aboute those things, Because someone likes me, and its so cool! So cool that means everyone doesent hate me! ^.^ Im happy. Well Im going to go now I have things to do. See ya, buds!



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Friday, April 8, 2005

Hello

..Why the FUCK am I depressed!?....


I have no reason to! I had a good day, I got two mangas more to my collection, Im eating chips and drinking Pepsi, Im correctly fine!!

No Im not. Im alone.

Why isnt there anyone to share this with me? I have seen that one goth boy stares at me, but its no usel He doesent care aboute me... He likes me because Im goth.

Why cant there be anyone I can bring light for when all other is gone? To make happy when hes sad? To hang with, someone who dont hate me? I used to with Christian, but hes dead....

You wanna know few things? SInce the day Christian died, he has been guarding me. I can even talk to him, Its almost like Angelica and Milessanne.... I still love him, he wants me to be happy and find someone but I cant! Every time I open my heart and want to let someone in they betray me! In way or other, and Im alone AGAIN! Why does it happen...? Not that I would like to have someone so searious yet, Im young and wild and free, but if it would last more than free days without being suddenly left alone, I would be happy. *sigh*

Hmm. Today one guy came talk to me when I was all alone waiting for a bus. But I couldnt care less. Only a month ago I would be jumping from happiness if he would talk to me, but now.... I hate that damn guy!! He told me Im a satanist, straight to my face!!! Fucking idiot!! If he could come to talk to me a month ago....
My best frien is doing greate with guys. Her crush is a goth too, as we both are. hes her classmate. When he found out whats her faivorite book, he started to read it. He defended her against few baka guys from her class. How sweet, why I am in the class of dorks? No waite.... Ville changed hes class from my best friends class.... So he must be different. Well its told he has a crush on me.... But I dont think its true. Well my insulting has been.... more less since he came to my class. Hmmmm.... I should start to talk to him. *grin*
Oh yeah, peoples, I have a guestion for you: When you were a kid, what were a thing you wanted to become or have in the future?
Mine is that I wanted marrie a black guy XDDDD I know its pretty weird!!! I mean, how many kid thinks things like that!? Besides when Im raised around racistic whites, Im one too, and for me its White, selfish shits. Just SHITS! Well I hate myself.- Maybe thats why I hate whites.... No waite, this is racism.... For whites! HAHAHAH!!! SUFFER WHITE PEOPLES!!! I dont mean it.... -_-;; Okay, lets put it right: Suffer white racistic peoples. THATS right. *nods*
Mwahaha, thinking abotue gone days make me happier. Days when I was five. Or ten. after that, everything sucked bad. Hmm. Not that, those days werent so good but better than these. Neh well. Its my life and its now or never (I am gonna live forever.... XDDD Remember the song? I dont)
Well first peoples: WHy cant I talk to mister cuties nro 1, 2 or 3!? AGH!!! It disturbs me so bad! But if they are white, racistic shits I dont even want to. Maybe I should just find that black guy so I would just get straight married and I wouldnt worrie.... -_-;;

I gotta go. Angelica wants to do something. I hope she takes care of the whole night that is left.... 8 hours.... hnh. See ya.




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Wednesday, April 6, 2005

....Hello.....
My fucking head doesent know what to feel. My feelings are confused.

Happy part: Peoples love me in MyO ^^ I have so many good friends around here, not in school so many, few good at there too, but most of them are here! Yay!

Sad part: Why cant anyone understood me? Why do I live? Why no-one wants to be with me in school? Always when Heidi is sick or something Im all laone at our class.... It so sucks...

scared part: Where is telk!? Where is he? What has happened!? Oh god if something has happen....

depressed part: All alone in this world with awful family.... My friends and beloved peoples have troubles and I cant do a shit to help them! No-one! ANyone at MyO either! WHy cant I help anyone!?

Angry part: Why the FUCK cant those depressed, scared and sad parts of me go away?! Why cant I just be feelingless shit who doesent care!? Everything would be so fucking much easier!!!

cool part: *yawn* Why the fuck...?

*sigh* Thats just the way it is.... Well now you know how Im feeling. So how are you guys? Ya know I started to think aboute this: Angelica and Milessanne DID wrong, but I could still let them be more free. Like, they could have half of my day.... Not the school part. They would so mess with teachers and my friends. I just know. DOnt ask how.
But thats gonna happen when they have made up all the mess they caused. And thats gonna take long time...

Well..... Im going now. I got lotta PMs to answer. Besides, I proised to my friend that I'll check her chara. And I got lot of homeworks to do. So. I see you guys later. Have a nice week.


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Monday, April 4, 2005

Better future.....
Good morning American! And Finland....

Being captured in my own body when Milessanne and Angelica were ruling, without my premission, I just realized what I want. I dont want to die, I want new beginning, new start so I wouldnt make those mistakes I have made again. Meaning, not to fell in love with all those guys who hurted me, and Im not meaning the one Im inlove with right now. I would like to stop Christians death, I would like to bring Markus and JP back.... And the friends I have losed. Steven, Yuki, Paula, Aino. Hmm. Gess Im dreaming for nothing. But I know few things I can do. Those few classmates I have hated, and still do, I could start a friendship with them. Like, giving a pencil if they need it, and things. Then I could stop fighting between me and Taija, and with Erika too. I could be nicer to Heidi and Minna, an I could talk to mister cutie. (a guy in our school. Damn tall, lightbrown, tall hair and eyeglasses. Dont DARE to say I have weird taste!!) Or then I could talk with mister cutie number 2 or 3. (2 is short, but a goth, 3 is the one who was in our restaurant) Oh yeah, or 4! (Another tall guy with eyeglasses) Njihihi. *grin* Whaaat girl can always dream!! Oh yeah, I could hit that one short guy in my class! He SO gets in my nerves.... I already hit him one time but I think he didnt learn, so this time, I will give him a black eye. *nod* Hmm. I should stop messing in Cookering. Well what can I do, my hands shake, I cant do anything aboute it!
And, starting this day, I am gonna so use Angelica and Milessanne. For start they could hunt JP in their hands so I could have little convertation with him.... That would be first step to make up all this shit they have caused. Im gonna put Cedric to watch them. The question is can I trust Cedric.... Hmm.
Well gess I should take better care of Milessanne and Angelica. Thought Milessanne seems to be depressed. Being captured in human body isnt so easy....
So, first step: I'll let Sanna watch my answers in English and Sweden classes. *nod* Then, I start to read on excams, so my grades go up. I'll start Taija with making those fights up, and I will borrow my penicls to Mia-Maria, Robert, Esa-Pekka and Sara. Yeah. Hmm, good start. But first, Im gonna go to call my bro. Lets just pray he answers me. *sigh* Yeah, and lets pray hes okay.... I havent heard from him in a long while... Well. Hes my bro. He can take care of myself.
Now, I will never let myself in sucha weak level as I was. Angelica is very good with dealing peoples when they are weak. I just gotta push everything bad from my mind and stop crying if I feel bad. Besides, even if I dont have friends at school or anything, I still have you guys here. *sigh* I just wish MyO was a real place. Well. Im going. I gotta won a drawing contest. I need money. When I have enough, these are places Im goin: Ohio (Im going to get that damn hug, Telk27!!), New Orleans, San Fransisco and Houston. Then I'll go to mexcico.

I just met a really cute 23 year old guy. Hes really nice, really. SO my type. Well. except hes few years too old but neh, what the heck. I have dated 27 year old guy and he didnt complain. Okay it wasnt searious but still....

Im going to go now. See you later guys. Have fun week.... And I'll say it again: I WILL make Milessanne and Angelica pay. *grunts* C'mon girls, let the hell begin.

Oh yeah: Its monday and Im not is school! Moms cellphone got messed up and sent message that Im not coming in school, so our taxi driver didnt pick me! YES!! The most hardest day goes there! *grin* Im SO lucky....








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Sunday, April 3, 2005

WTF!?
....What day is it...?

What the fuck?! SUNDAY!? No shit!! But....

Who the hell had put those posts up in my site.... waite....
Guys, could SOMEONE excplaine me what has been up with me in few days?! I dont remember anything from these two days! I thought it was friday! No waite.... Milessanne! Angelica!!
Okay, Those two have been playing here. Every post aboute changin places: bullshit. Those two really like to mess with me, what the fuck have they been doing!? Their just like Ryoka, always messing with my life!! Oh FUCK Im so sorry that those two have made you worried! Forget all those posts that 'I' have put up in these days! Oh shit, FUCK, I hate those two!! Goddamn if they were alive I would so kick their asses! GODDAMN IDIOTS!!
Okay Im sorry for them. Im gonna make them pay. Now dont worrie aboute me, im living and Im fine, thought angry that they spent the weekend instead of me. There were the good weekend. Fucking greate.

Well Im not on this week.
See you....

~Jo
(now it really is me)





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Peoples....
Its me....

Havent Angelica told you...? Gess not.

Im not gone forever. Im still here, thought Angelica would be in the main control. I will takl to ones I want to, and to name few of you, Amerill, HeeroYuy77, CloudStrife7777 etc.
Look, you say you care.... How the hell can I be sure you do? Gess how many times I have been told that 'Hey, I care aboute you' Then I have been dumbed like an useless trash. It just doesent work for me anymore! Angelica knows better how to act with peoples, this why he can decide. Look. This is not gonna be forever decision. Its some kinda holiday from original. Angelica doesent have to just be captured, and I dont have to take all this shit. I'll be here peoples, you are too precious to lose! Besides, when I think my health, this is good. When theres no stress, theres no panic attacks.
I will be back, I dunno how long it takes, but I WILL be back. Lets just let Angelica live for a while, shall we?

Hmm. I see everyone didnt get it. ANgelica is one free soul that lives in my body, also called as Demon. This demon Angelica wants live, I dont, so I will back off for a moment and let Angelica live this life for a while. Myabe few weeks or months, so long that my stress goes over. You get it? I hope so.

Im not in MyO this week so much. So. Have a nice week....

I'll be here with you guys.... Angelica will let me be here, she isnt a cruel demon, like some of them are.
Dont worrie. Im just fine now. And will be here.






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Saturday, April 2, 2005

Farewell
The knife is in my neck

Okay, today, I heard a bad news aboute one I love. WHY THE FUCK DO EVERYONE BETRAY ME!!!???

Im gonna do it, Im gonna fucking do it, Im never gonna see my bro again, I am so ugly that everyone hates me, This life is so FUCKED UP!!! GOD, you already took Christian!!! What did I do to deserve this!? What the FUCK did I do to you!? What the fusk do you want!?! YES, peoples, Im crying, Im not fucking gonna cope this anymore I so hate this fucking world and life and all the assholes in it!!! Im so alone, everyone I love has been taken away way or another!! I dont wanna live!!! I want to die and this fucking knife is gonna give the freedom to me!!! Tell me one fucking reason why I wouldnt do it!?! Fuck that hug, fuck the two euros, FUCK the 'private person' at least Im with Christian when Im dead!!! At least THEN I got someone who really loves me! Fuck to you all! Even if I stay alive, tell me what do I have to live for!? These are the last words of the real me, Johanna, who lives in me. I will throw the knife away.... I have other way from this. Goodbye, friends. I will miss specially Telk27, AwesomeDude898, Khillah Goku, Adylia, Amerill, Lord Darsha, Lingo, Wekoronshei, Kayago, scage, Panda Net, f7chick. And f7chick, thank you.
My every friend out of MyO: Ryoka, Miyu, Chi, Nadja, Heidi.... Im so sorry. Just try to understand me. I just cant do this. Im not as strong as everyone thinks I am.
This body will be Angelicas for now. She knows how to live. I love you all.... I just dont wanna live like this. In pain. Goodbye, Johanna. Welcome, Angelica.
Dont worrie. I wont let her hurt any of you. Well. One of you.

So, welcome me!! Yes, I am Angelica. One of Johannas demons. That poor girly is now chained inside me, and Im gonna put Cedric and Mr. Nameless after everyone who had hurted her. Its still her body and heart, you know. So. If you have anything to say to Johanna, I will be pleasured to tell it to her. You gotta get used to my forever sarcasm, and know that Jo isnt coming back. If this is what you peoples wanted by hurting her, congratulations, you made it. And all friend of Jo - she really did love you. MyO was her life. Since today, Im starting new life, in this body. And dont worrie. Jo is happily in inside of this body, and now more free to be with Christian, so shes correctly fine. Congrats for her. So. If your not interested to make friendship with a demon, you can delet me from your friendlist. Its fine for me, I dont actually know the heck of you, so I dont care. If you REALLY want to talk to her, PM me. I will let her be free herself by times. As I already said, This is still her body, not mine. Even if Im in the head control of it now. So.... Hello, new friends of mine. Lets have fun together, shall we? Good.
Note for Adylia: Jo said that when you call, she wants to talk, so you dont have any problem with this. Oh yeah, and Milessanne says 'hi'.
Oh yeah: Its bad if you dont belive what this post is saying. It is all damn true.

Jo wanted to say one thing, so I'll let her:
I am sorry. Aboute everything. Go on on your lifes. Thats all I want.

Thats it. Now nicely say goodbye to suffering Jo, as she leaves this world for me to worrie aboute. And as she said: Live your lifes. Its not the end of the world.... Yet.
Oh yeah! We still can change places, if she has a reason good enough for it. So peoples, you want her back? Then try harder.

Hello world. Prepare, mortals, Angelica the demon is here.




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