myOtaku.com: Ritsuka Aoyagi

myO Still <3's You

Vitals

Birthday
• 1992-02-24
Location
• if you ask ill tell you..
Member Since
• 2005-10-31
Occupation
• none...
Real Name
• Dahlia, like the flowerr^^

Personal

Achievements
• geez, i was very dpresiv bfore... huh? id like 2 win a drawin´contest^^
Anime Fan Since
• i was around 5,i guess
Favorite Anime
• loveless, ouran host club, scryed,FMA, REC...
Goals
• winnin´a DRAWIN contest!!!
Hobbies
• drawing and writing
Talents
• hey! ull see that by ur selfs!

myOtaku.com: Ritsuka Aoyagi

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

praying for god......
right now 18:36pm my mom started to gough up blood and vomiting... my dad just came to the place we are at (my mom´s best friend´s house...) she will be taked to the hospital in 15 minutes more... i-im so useless what s-should i do? i have never sawn her like that... fainting... vomiting... im so sarious with this! ill not go to the hospital because my dad says he´ll go on "emergency" to the hospital...
i cant help her... i can just stare and try to hold my tears...
why? she was feeling okay at the morning... now shes screaming of the pain in her stomach and she cant even stand up or even stay on her feets.. im such an heartless... im not criying... or feeling sad at all... im worried thought... 18:44pm... my dad is trying to get her on shes feets but its useless... i can hear the ambulance comming, its outside the departament...oh dear lord, please help her...

*tears comming out the eyes*

i-i... i want to help but i cant! every second its more harder to take, more harder to write this...
why am i on the computer if my mother needs my help right now!?

.................................

shes telling me not to come near her... why? do i make her feel worst? so im useless after all... my dad just started to yell at me for not calling him when it was just an headache... and now what am i gonna do? my lil sis and her friend wen to the neighbours house (the girl´s friends house )
and ill stay here all alone... 18:51pm... the ambulance cant come up because the elevator is being repaired and we´re on the 9th floor.. the phone is ringing... its the ambulance they say they´ll have to call an other ambulance that have the necesary stuff for this case... w-why is this happening?!
i cant take it anymore..... please y-you dont need to comment this post, im writing this like a um...ahhhh.... i dont know why im doing this! writing it just makes me feel like a useless puppet!i cant help her so i must be here for not disturbing...

"i pray for god to make sure she will be okay...please...."

time is about 18:57, and im still useless....

..................................

time´s 19:42 pm my mom was taked to the hospital 10 minutes ago...

*prays to god*

i feel furious... not sad or worry... my hearts is beating like every normal day... im emotionless... why?

.......................

20:24 pm my mom is okay the hospital called and they sayd she okay.... she will stay the night there... now 20:29 pm they called once again from the hospital... shell be alright... thats good to hear... i feel more calmed somehow....

*gentle smile*

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