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Fantasy Realm Dweller
Member Since
2003-10-22
Occupation
Human Being Cos-player. You figure it out.
Real Name
Rachel
Personal
Achievements
Many things, of course!
Anime Fan Since
I started watching anime!
Favorite Anime
Currently, Naruto. Or Kappa Mikey, though I don't think that counts...
Goals
To find my muse, whom I lost, yet again...
Hobbies
Ooh, you touch my tra la la.
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Artsy things. You name, I'm good at it... for the most part.
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Thursday, March 4, 2004
Arrgh! Pandas can't talk!
Hi peoples! ;P Not much happened today. I just walked aroung school and fell asleep in classes. Normal. ^^
Funny FanFic! Here, read!
"Damn it!" Cursed Vegeta as he eyed his now empty can of shaving cream. "Why couldn't I have replaced it before I needed it?" He glided his hand over his still stubbly upper lip and growled.
He listened from around the corner, wondering if he could tell 'the woman' about his lack of shaving cream now.
Chi-Chi and Bulma were still kicking themselves laughing in the dining room. At Vegeta's expense.
How did I ever allow myself to become this lenient. There was a time when Vegeta would never allow anyone to laugh at him. Or say that he looked stupid.
He stared long and hard at the shiny aluminum can. Wondering if it was worth the trouble to go himself. He hated to leave a job incomplete. Especially since certain persons would be unsatisfied with anything less than a hairless visage.
Oh well, guess I'll be getting some more myself.
Casually, he strolled into the living room, where Bra was watching music videos. He quickly pocketed the shaving cream, not wanting her to think that he actually liked his appearance without the mustache.
Just because she was right doesn't mean she has to know it.
Vegeta picked his car keys from the key rack on the wall. Bra gasped with delight when she saw his profile.
"See, Daddy! I knew that you would look better without that ugly mustache." She chirped.
Vegeta eyed her in contempt. "I liked the mustache."
Bra cocked her eyebrow of her left eye in disbelief. "But it looked stupid on you."
"Hmph!" Vegeta grunted in displeasure and headed towards the door. Three seconds later, to his dismay, he was being followed.
"Where are you going?" Bra chirped as she bounced along behind him.
"Out."
"Out where?"
"I have to get something."
"What?"
"It's not for you." Vegeta replied as he advanced towards his car parked by the curb.
"What?"
"None of your business!" Vegeta snapped as he opened the driver's side door, getting more than a little bit annoyed.
Bra looked at him a bit perplexed at his hostility, then smiled cheerfully.
"Can I come?"
"No!" Vegeta sat down and slammed the door.
"Please Daddy?"
"I said no."
"Puh-leeeeese."
She batted those big blue eyes at him and put on her puppy dog face.
Vegeta could feel that disgusting, warm, squishy feeling in his stomach. The one he always felt when Bra used the puppy dog face.
Bra could see his hesitation. "Pleeeeeeeese." She beefed up her performance.
"Fine!" Vegeta snapped. He hated how she could manipulate him, but he just couldn't say no to his little princess. "Just keep quiet!"
"Yay!" Bra jumped up and down then ran to the passengers side. "This is going to be fun!" She squeaked.
"I highly doubt that." Vegeta mumbled and started the car.
"So, Mysti said that Rita liked him. But Rita said she didn't and that she , like, though he was gross. So Mysti told Sara and Sara asked him out. Then Rita got all mad and stuff and called Sara a boyfriend-thief. So we were all in the girls room after gym class and Rita started in on Sara. And she was all like, "You're a bitch!" Then Sara was all like, "Yeah, well you act like you're easy to get guys to go out with you because you're not pretty enough to get them on your own." That's when they started fighting. It was kind of fun to watch until Sara started to slam Rita's head off the floor, then I told them they should stop. Then they both told me to shut up and kept on fighting each other. Rita was looking pretty bad so I got them to stop by telling them that Stephen really didn't like either of them and he was only going out with them because he thought they were both easy. Then they stopped and asked if that was true. It wasn't, but I 'm mad at Stephen because he got me in trouble in math class. So, I said that it was and they left to beat him up. I heard that he hid in the boys room all day!"
Bra giggled loudly and turned to Vegeta, who was in disbelief that he could father someone so un-saiyanish.
Bra stopped giggling to ask, "Where are we going shopping?"
"We are not going shopping!" Vegeta disagreed.
"Well, you're going to buy something." Bra observed.
"That's right." Vegeta agreed.
"That's shopping." Bra concluded.
"No, that's going to buy one thing that I need despera.." He realized what he was saying "…something I need." He corrected himself hastily.
"Yeah, that's shopping."
"No!" Vegeta protested. "Shopping is going to a store and wandering around for hours on end looking at things you don't need. There's a difference."
"I don't see any difference, Daddy."
Vegeta growled. "Never mind! I thought I told you to keep quiet!"
"Well it's just that you've been driving around aimlessly and...."
"I have not been driving around aimlessly."
"Yes you have."
Vegeta glared at her determination to start an argument. She was right, but it wasn't his fault. He figured that he could get his shaving cream at a drug-store since that's where Bulma usually bought the families toiletries. Unfortunately, he had never gone with her to buy the toiletries. Ever. Therefore, he had no idea where he was going.
"Look, whatever you need is probably at the mall." Bra suggested sweetly and flashed him a big, hopeful grin.
Vegeta glared at her. For the umpteenth time that day, she was right. Vegeta actually considered her proposal, despite the fact that he abhorred the idea of going to the mall. At least he knew where that was. He had been there lots of times. Driving Bra there, picking Bra up. Going there to retrieve Bra after the school called him saying that she was absent from her classes, interrupting his training.
If that happens one more time, I swear……
"So, are we going to the mall?"
Vegeta grunted in affirmation.
"Yay! We're going shopping!" Bra cheered and waved her arms happily in the air.
Vegeta growled in dread
Later, Vegeta wandered the aisles of Satan city drugs for about the twentieth time. Bra, who had been bouncing along behind, following her Daddy wherever he went , was getting restless. Vegeta was trying to figure out how to get rid of her while he bought his shaving cream.
"Daddy, what are you looking for?"
"Never mind." He replied in exasperation. Why can't she go browse by herself?
"Are you getting shaving cream?" Bra asked.
Vegeta nearly had an aneurysm at that statement.
"I noticed that you were almost out the other day."
"Why are you touching my shaving cream?" Vegeta demanded angrily.
"Mom and I use it to shave our legs."
Vegeta nearly exploded. No wonder I ran out!
Bra giggled at his reddening face. "Why are you so angry? It's only shaving cream. I'll get my own from now on." Vegeta calmed down a bit.
"I don't want that mustache to ever come back." She added slyly. Thorally amused.
Vegeta turned blood red. "What do you have against my mustache, girl?"
"It looks stupid on you." Shrugged Bra as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
Vegeta was flabbergasted. How could he defend himself against such an ungrounded accusation. Well, when one cannot defend, retaliation is the only other course of action.
"That outfit you're wearing looks stupid on you." Vegeta crossed his arms and stared down at his daughter's appalled expression.
"I like this outfit!"
"Well, I liked my mustache."
"But it looked....stupid!" Bra protested stubbornly.
"That outfit looks stupid!" Vegeta protested in the same tone.
"I think she looks hot!"
Both Bra and Vegeta turned to confront a boy, about twelve or so, oogling Bra and smiling like Goku.
Bra stared at him in disgust. Vegeta growled viciously, frightening the kid out of his wits and causing him to run screaming out of the aisle for his mother.
Unexpectedly, Bra started giggling, then laughing then ... she noticed her father scowling. She stifled her outburst and sighed.
"So, are you getting that shaving cream?"
"No! I'm getting a.....personal item."
Bra stared at her father uncomfortably. A personal item could indicate any sort of private thing. Bra lingered the thoughts of certain items, completely grossed out at the thought of her father shopping for them. Vegeta realized that maybe his attempt to be vague opened up a new window of assumption with his daughter. Her look of embarrassment/ horror seemed to indicate that he'd made a grave mistake. Vegeta couldn't stop himself from blushing.
"Why don't you go find yourself a new outfit?" Vegeta suggested.
A diversion, perfect!
"Really? New clothes? And I don't have to do anything for them?"
"You have to leave right now, that's what you have to do." Vegeta snapped. Then, faster than you could say Super Saiyan, Bra was off to do some power shopping.
Ten minutes later, Vegeta was wandering the mall looking for his daughter's Ki. It was difficult with so many people around. He growled as he scanned the seeming endless line of storefronts that surrounded him.
Damn it. I won't find her for hours at this rate. Oh, wait, there she is.
Vegeta went in the direction of Bra's Ki. It only flared for a second, but it was enough to give Vegeta an exact location. He quickly found out the reason why Bra raised her Ki.
When he met her, she was turning round and round in a dressing mirror looking quite frustrated.
"Do you like this?" She asked her father, standing in front of him and turning to show him every side. Vegeta was thorally displeased at what he saw.
Bra was wearing a see through top with only the tiniest red halter top imaginable underneath. With a black mini skirt and her own red thigh high boots completing the ensemble. Vegeta remembered the way the pre-teen in the drugstore had gawked at her like a drooling pervert, he could only imagine what boys Bra's age would be thinking.
" I hate it!"
Bra looked a little crushed, then giggled.
"Oh, Daddy, don't be silly, all the girls are wearing this! It's the style!"
Vegeta remembered the last time he heard the words "It's the style..." He would never live down that awful pink shirt that Bulma tricked him into wearing.
"No! I refuse to purchase that. Find something more conservative."
Bra huffed angrily. "You sound like Mom!" And then retreated into her dressing room to try on more things.
Bra tried outfit after outfit after outfit. Vegeta was sure she'd tried on every one In the store. Finally Bra reemerged wearing her own clothes, leaving a giant mound of garments behind.
"What one do you want?" Vegeta asked wearily, relieved that his ordeal was coming to an end.
"I don't want any of those."
"What!?" Vegeta exploded. Bra quickly retreated into the hallway, thanking the saleswoman as she fled.
"What do you mean you don't want any of them? We were there for over an hour!" Vegeta exclaimed when he caught up to her. Not in an indoor voice either.
Bra scanned the hallway, embarrassed at her father's outburst and knowing he was going to continue as soon as he heard what she had to say.
"Look, I'm sorry. But you don't want to waste money on something that I'm never going to wear do you?"
Vegeta tried extra hard to be patient. "But Princess, you had plenty to choose from." He stated slowly, trying not to be nasty with his little girl.
"I did not!" Bra disagreed. "You shot down nearly every one I liked. You only liked the ones I knew you would like, but I hated them."
"Why did you waste time trying on ones you hated anyway?" Vegeta exclaimed, losing his patience.
"Because, I knew that you would like those."
Vegeta put his hand to his forehead. Why did women have to be so damned confusing.
"Fine!" Vegeta finally said. "Let's just go." Vegeta turned away and started to walk briskly towards the nearest exit. He couldn't be rid of the place soon enough, and he was not planning on ever returning either.
Shopping! Hmph! Earthlings and their stupid ways to waste time!
"But you promised that you'd buy me an new outfit." Bra whimpered.
Vegeta turned to her and tried to think of a way to get himself out of this situation as painlessly as possible.
She's too old to throw a temper tantrum, isn't she? She wouldn't start bawling, would she? Dammit, why'd I have to go and promise...Promise?
Vegeta smiled triumphantly. "I don't remember making any promise." And he turned and continued on his way.
Bra blinked a few times. Then she smirked evilly.
Fine, If he wants to play this game then so be it!
"You're not being fair, Daddy!" Bra stated with intense indignation and not in an indoor voice. It was successful, it got her father's attention.
Vegeta looked at her unimpressed. Demanding to know how, in her teen-aged opinion, he was being unfair.
She stood firmly in place, with her legs spread and her hands planted on her hips.
"You got to shave off your stupid mustache, but I have to keep my stupid outfit."
Vegeta glared at her. Conniving Brat. " You said that you liked that outfit."
"Well, you said that you liked your mustache. It wasn't your fault it was stupid and it's not my fault my outfit is. But it's not fair that you were able to prevent yourself from looking stupid, but I have to put up with it? See my point?"
"Don't you have anything else in your closet at home?" Vegeta asked. It wasn't as if she were a cartoon character, after all.
"That's not the point! You said that you would get me a new one." Emphasizing the word said so he couldn't weedle himself out of it. She smiled, left side turned up in triumph. She had him and he knew it.
"Hmph!" Vegeta said smiling himself. What a perfect saiyan princess.
"All right, one more store. Choose wisely. And you only have an hour. After that we're going whether you've chosen one or not."
Bra gasped with joy and flung herself at him. "Thank you Daddy!"
Vegeta started to sweat as his daughter hung off him in the middle of the mall with people passing by on either side of them. "Bra! What have I told you about public displays of affection?"
Bra let go of him immediately. "Sorry, it won't happen again, promise."
"Hmph!" Vegeta scoffed. Sure it won't
Vegeta concentrated on trying not to look apathetic as Bra tried on more outfits. At the next store, he concentrated on trying not to look pissed off. At the fifth he concentrated on trying not to scream. And at the eighth he concentrated on not destroying the entire infernal mall with all its annoying salespeople, and customers, and his daughter, who was so damned indecisive!
"Daddy, which one did you like the best." Bra asked as she held two dresses up to her.
"Whichever..." Vegeta said , yawning as he opened his mouth.
"I need an opinion." Insisted Bra.
Vegeta sighed in exasperation. "Why? I don't know what looks good. I don't wear the stuff you do."
"I should hope not!." Bra chuckled then turned serious when her father glared viciously at her. "Well, do you find this attractive?" She asked, dropping the dresses out of view and showing him the outfit she was wearing. It happened to be another black mini skirt, only it was tighter than the previous one. She was wearing a one sleeved, tight, red T-shirt with the word Princess silk-screened in white across the chest.
" Not when it's on you!" Vegeta blushed. He couldn't believe she'd asked.
"I meant if it was on another woman."
"You mean your mother?"
"Yeah, sure. Whatever works for ya."
"Your mother is the only woman on this planet that I find attractive, Bra." Vegeta explained matter of factly crossing his arms over his chest. "And she wouldn't wear that."
"Well, if she were younger..."
Vegeta heaved a sigh, fed up.
"Do you want it or not?"
Bra looked to the mound of clothes in her dressing room.
"It's just that...I want a lot of the outfits I tried on here."
Vegeta braced himself for the answer to his next question. "How many would you like?"
"All of them." Bra hesitantly stated.
"Very well." Vegeta said, he didn't want to wait around anymore. He had already stuck around for three more hours than he'd wanted. He pulled out his gold card. "Servant woman! My daughter will be taking them all." He yelled in the middle of the store, expecting to be waited on immediately.
Bra hopped up and down with delight.
"Get dressed!" Vegeta ordered. Bra squealed and skipped off to do as she was told.
Vegeta sighed, happy that his ordeal was finally over. He could actually see the exit and was about to order Bra to hurry up , when....
"Daddeeeee?"
Shit!
"Do you think I could get some new accessories to go with my pretty new clothes. You know, ear-rings and headbands and leggings and...."
She stopped when she noticed that Vegeta was scowling at her.
"I only need to go to this one store. " Bra said in her sweetest voice ever. Vegeta still scowled. Bra smiled, she had one last ace up her long red glove. "It's right beside the food court."
Vegeta stopped, his scowl softened.
"Food court?"
Bra gleefully skipped over to her father, who was sitting at a table piled with food. The table beside it was piling up with the wrappers of food he'd already eaten. People were staring at him, amazed. Vegeta didn't seem to care though, he was too busy enjoying himself. Bra sat down across from him and added her new bags to the pile siting on the floor next to Vegeta.
"See, told' ya I wouldn't be long!" She said as she reached to steal one of his fries. Vegeta growled viciously at her. Saiyan language translation: "Get your own food, brat!"
An hour later, Bra finished off the last bite of her fifth banana split and Vegeta swallowed his twentieth triple hamburger with the works whole.
He sighed the 'I'm really full sigh.' The one men sigh after thanksgiving dinner. Vegeta couldn't wait to get home and put on looser pants.
"Let's go." He said, re-energized after spending hours shopping, but not wanting to stay any longer.
They were almost at the exit.
Yes, finally!
" PUPPIES!" Bra squealed and ran over to the pet store.
"Damn it." Vegeta mumbled in a weary voice and slowly slunk over to the pet store, carrying all of Bra's shopping bags.
When he caught up, Bra was cuddling an adorable fluffy white puppy, who was licking her face all over.
"Awwww, you're so cute! Yes you are!" Bra cooed. She turned to her father, wearing her puppy dog face. "Daddddeeeeee, could I puh-leese have this puppy?"
"No." Vegeta replied, ever-so patiently.
"Aww, but he love's me! See, he's kissing me!"
Vegeta growled, really fed up with this shopping. "He's probably just licking food off your face. Put him back and come along!"
"Awwwwww." Bra whined, looking sad. "But I love him. I'll take care of him, I promise."
"Put the mongrel down."
"He's not a mongrel!" Bra protested scowling at her father. She turned back to the wiggling puppy. "He's too cute to be a mongrel. You have to admit that he's cute."
"He's cute now. But just wait until he starts chewing up your clothes and leaving little surprises all over the house." Vegeta spat in disgust at the thought of it.
"I'll take care of him! I promise!" Bra repeated more solemnly than before.
"Yeah, for the first few weeks, then what? You'll go off with all your annoying little friends and leave your annoying mongrel behind to bother me!" Vegeta examined him at first in disgust, then his eyes lit up as if he just had a wonderful idea.
"On second thought, let's buy him and when he's big enough, I'll have him for a snack. He looks like he might taste good."
Bra gasped in horror and put the dog back in the pen. Immediately Vegeta started to leave. Bra followed at a safe distance.
"Sometimes you really scare me, Daddy." She admitted.
"Next time you'll come when I tell you ."
"This is the first time you've taken me shopping, Daddy!" Bra chirped as she looked at all her packages overflowing the back seat.
"I don't remember asking you to come along, it was you who followed me." Vegeta corrected.
"What did you buy then?" Bra asked, even though she knew.
"It's none of your business." Vegeta replied calmly despite the ordeal he'd just been through.
Bra's face fell in disappointment. Why wouldn't he just tell her? It wasn't as if shaving cream was a horrible taboo. She smiled and pulled out his not well hidden package.
"Then what's this shaving cream then?" Bra asked sweetly.
Vegeta blushed, then tried to ignore her.
Seconds later two big thugs, at lest twice Bra's age pulled up besides them and started hitting on her.
It's that damned outfit! Vegeta concluded and then proceeded to side-swipe them and yank off their steering wheel. Sending them flying into the lake. That should get the message through. No human male is good enough for my daughter!
To his dismay, Bra started to yell stuff at them and brought him into it. "..and he's in a bad mood because he had to take me shopping!"
"Shopping!" Vegeta spat in disgust. He turned to Bra to give her a warning. "Don't tell people that! I was not shopping!"
"Yes you were!" Bra teased. "Earlier you said, "...shopping is going to a store and wandering around for hours on end looking at things you don't need'." Bra imitated her father in a gruff voice. " And that's what we did, wasn't it?"
"Hmph!" Vegeta grunted angry at himself, knowing that she was right again. How am I ever going to live this down? The Prince of all Saiyans shopping!
See, funny! ^^ I found it at this site!
Like I said, I didn't do nothin today. So, I got nothin else to say.
TTFN
Ta Ta For Now!
"Go slip on a banana peel and drop dead!" - Shuichi, Gravitation.
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