Thursday, April 28, 2005

   Sixth Entry
I have been feeling weird lately. I have had my ups and my downs. The other night I was just sitting here at the computer and it just kind of clicked in my head that I am the kid that my biological father gave up on. At first it made me feel really sad but then I wrote a lyrics about it and now I feel a lot better. I will post the lyrics on here at the end. I go to school even earlier then usual now just to spend time with Rachael, she means so much to me and she makes me so happy. Thats why I dont knnow why I suddenly feel so sad sometimes, it makes no sense to me. I mean sometimes I can be happy one second and the next I feel like tears might come to my eyes, that is if I cried like a normal person but I dont. Anyway, no worries, I will be fine, I always am. Here is the song lyrics that I wrote:

Type: Lyrics
Title: Without him I’ve had a better life

I just realized,
That I am the one,
That he gave up on,
I am the one,
That he brushed aside,
And now knowing this,
Brings me far from bliss,
And now that he’s trying,
To come back into my life,
Oh what will I do?

I’ll show him,
Who I have become,
I’ll show him,
The son that he has lost,
I will make him see,
That I am a better man than he,
I’ll make him realize,
That without him,
I’ve had a better life.

Oh now I know,
That he is all about show,
I wonder if he even knows,
What love is truly about,
And if he does,
The question becomes,
Has he ever,
Truly loved me at all,
Although in the end,
It doesn’t really matter.

I’ll show him,
Who I have become,
I’ll show him,
The son that he has lost,
I will make him see,
That I am a better man than he,
I’ll make him realize,
That without him,
I’ve had a better life.

I really should thank him,
He gave me two wonderful gifts,
One is the man I call my dad,
The other is my pain,
And the lesson that with it came,
Because my children,
Will never have to think,
Why did my Daddy leave me,
What did I do wrong.

I’ll show him,
Who I have become,
I’ll show him,
The son that he has lost,
I will make him see,
That I am a better man than he,
I’ll make him realize,
That without him,
I’ve had a better life.


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