myOtaku.com: Ruri Illuser

myO Still <3's You

Vitals

Birthday
• 1989-08-10
Gender
• Female
Location
• In a galxy far far away where Cew-chan and obi one live
Member Since
• 2003-12-21
Occupation
• Nerd Otaku School girl
Real Name
• The Great and Powerful Reanef the V!ummm.... FEAR ME!*giggels*:::thumbs up twards Eclipse::::^-^

Personal

Achievements
• I've become a complete and total loser!! L7 weenie all the way calloway!!!
Anime Fan Since
• 3rd grade(bebop)
Favorite Anime
• ::scraches head::: too many to count ^^;;
Goals
• to become an animator or manga-ka
Hobbies
• Annoying people,Being scaractic,slaping pervs,being a perv,reading and writing fanfics(most lemony yaoi),etc
Talents
• Many...Would you like to find out? ^.~

myOtaku.com: Ruri Illuser

Saturday, March 20, 2004

For Art-"Eturnal Slumber"

Last night I was worried for some strange reson
I couldn't sleep
I couldn't dream that night
I inflicted pain for fun and thought nothing of it
And you
You the who suffered all those days, nights,hours,mintues
I had joy in my heart that night and happiness in my laughter
Playing, fooling around
having innocent fun
And yet there was a burden on my mind
and ache in my chest

I wish I got to know you more
To hear about "The good ol' days"
To share another soup and sandwich lunch with you
You never told me about the real you and now that I look at what I did I slap myself
My inner me souts and rips me apart for not asking those questions
You always had laught that cought on and would never stop

When you were near I didn't want to be around the people that were greeting you
Damn my snap-jugment
Damn my gulable-ness
Damn my black heart for only caring for a second
Just damn
Damn me........

I regret everything I've done to make me think that I disliked you
Cuz deep down I felt a connection
its wire thin
and yet its still a connection

I greated the dawn of this day with heavy eyes and a grin
a grin like a murdurer
thinking everything was going the way I wanted to go
think the absude thought that at that moment life was perfect

I layed my head down
I tryed to sleep
I didn't realize what I was doing
as I drifeted into a scilent slumber
I only felt freedom and relife
Like something was lifted off my shoulders
And yet
at this very moment
I reget what I felt
I wish I never had those feelings

I awoke refreshed and renewed
I laughed and threatend to kill my coco peables
And complained it was too cold
I talked a while to my friends for awhile
and was just
myself

Myself
free from everything
felt nothing
and yet
remebered everything

I had gotten news
You were gone
Passed away
the creepy thing is
at the exact same time you breathed your last breath
I awoke
refreshed and anew

It scares me
You should have taken that breath and not me
but I bet your refreshed
relived that you don't have to suffer with the pian of this material world any longer
May you rest
and stay
be happy
and smile
Because you will forever restin my heart
Untill my time has come to join you in eternal slumber of another's heart.....

This poem is for my beloved second Uncle Art who passed away at 9:30 this morning....right as I was getting up. I think this is the least I could to for him to honor him and show that he was a part of my life even though I only saw him once a year for about 5 hours.

but something was different this year.......I din't get to see him at all.

take care,

Brittany
aka Ruri Illuser
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