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myOtaku.com: Samejima Mamimi


Monday, June 27, 2005


I seem to be at a lose of words right now. Everything feels like a dream so I suppose I feel confused about today. It seems my mother is trying to spend more time with me but I don't really know why. It feels so awkward after this long of time where she didn't seem to care about ayone but herself. Both of my parents seem to be putting on a mask. Its like they're hiding their feeling and keeping them bottled up inside for us so that we won't cry about the fact that they're splitting up. Mostly for my sisters I guess. I don't really care what happens. It none of my business anyway. Well, I might be transferring schools to Harmony Science Academy. I've been feeling kind of sad lately but thats okay. It's nothing new. I can cope with my feelings but I can't help but wonder what this is doing to my sisters. They don't like to talk about it they seem to be avoiding the topic at all cost. But maybe its just me. Oh well.

Sometimes I wonder why people are so hateful to each other. There are so many people that never do anything wrong, yet everyone hates them. Is it their purity that for some reason gets on their nerves? And there are some people that just don't take the time to learn about others. They say that they are so unfortunate and say that everyone hates them but they talk about other people that are more unfortunate than themselves like they are so high and mighty. But I suppose I'm at fault for that as well. I never try to talk to people because they make me feel bored because we don't have like interests. I can't say I've ever really said anything that I meant to be hurtful. I just try to keep my mind in a realistic state. But the other day that post was really hateful. It was wrong of me to say that people love for drama. But usually I just take it as I see it. I mean what else would explain the fact that people try to have relationships with people that will never work. Because so many people do do that. They say that they are in love but nevermind. I really know nothing about love I'm still so young. I can't really say I've felt feelings like that for anyone. But for some reason I think I'd prefer that. It seems better to not go through the pain of losing a loved one. Than never having to feel that at all. But then again I will be very lonely.

Thats all for today.

Love and Peace.

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