Friday, September 3, 2004

   STUPID
STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUUUUUUUUPID, I'M SO FREAKING STUUUUUUPID, I CANNOT FUCKING BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!!>< damn. ok, so last year, well, like, urm, 4 months ago maybe? last school year, in May, at the end, they had a dj playing music I don't like in the main hall. these two girls i was eating lunch with did, and they went to hear some of it. we were in a couple hallways away, by the library.

so while they're off JAMMIN, I sit there, staring down the stairwell absently, just a freshman girl dressed up in white pants and a shirt that showed a bit too much chest for my liking, I'm I start grouchily to fiddle with it so that it covers up to about an in above the "armpit" line, and not show an inch of skin. finally, I decide that I should just leave it showing a little "cleavage" not that there is much, than show any tummy.

I give up, stare at the wall trying to ignore the music, when these two guys walk by. one jerks his head in my general direction, and says, "Esta bonita" (something like that. my spanish speaking, not so good.)the other guy nods, and I ignore them, didn't bother to try to comprehend what they are saying.

the two guys go downstairs, and the girls come back like :o what's wrong I ask, and they go, Did he just say bonita at you?! i was like, I dunno.**shrug**

they go :O and tell me, he did! do you know what that means?! me, I say NO. and they go, well, he just called you pretty. I said, what, why? they tell me because I am, and I look like this: -.- (I am ugly)

then my friend jea looked into it, and found out about him, and showed him to me, and my other friend said that he liked me, and I said, that's all good and fine, but if I don't know him, i don't want him to like me just for my looks. i want to be liked for my fucked up personallity, not my fucked up looks

so he got disappointed, and I didn't care. NOW, he's in my lit. class, and he's not exactly handsome, but cute in his own way. and he's smart, and nice. and now I like him. >< damn. I am pretty sure I ruined all chances of him liking me at all again (plus there's the whole goth thing) and I am too shy to tell him anything. sucks so much. at least I don't like him much.

also, I had a lot of people that i got to their sites through random member, and I sincerely liked all the sites, they're really good, I like to read people's posts. some I don't like, so I ignored those sites. anyway, to No One-san, I write: cool poetry, it's good. and you don't have to add me as a friend. I just add anyone because I like their site and want easy acces without using a butt load of bookmarking space

Inuyasha2-san, I'm glad you aren't a bitch about differences of opinions like so many people are prone to do. I'm glad we can still be friends enough without hating each other, because you still sound like a good person

everyone else who signed my gb, thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you're all great! **huuuuug**thank you!
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