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Saturday, November 13, 2004


   not quite randmom thoughts
I've been thinking a little. yes, it's a shock. Ive come to realize some things:

1) on thanksgiving, it will be the one year anneversary of my cutting...it seems longer, but that's how long I've been serious about it...T.T

2) My dad is going to move to the Ukraine in like, 8 months. That means, my life will utterly and completely change...I..I hate the idea because although I hate my dad, i don't want him to leave. he owes it to my mom to pay for something for me. it isn't fair. I doubt I'll miss him, and if he's going to move, he should get on with it and leave, the sooner the better.

3) my dad has made me evil. He always tries to tell me to do something that's evil. Like, last night, I was talking about slavery, and he said he thinks the slave owners were smart, he wants one, it wasn't that bad, working is like slavery, etc. and he used to tell me that black people are **insert racial slur of your choice here** i hate it, it's no good to tell him anything. how can one person be so mean? he doesn't know any black people, and yet he still thinks of them as lesser.

i mean, everybody is entitled to their own opinion, but when you judge a group of people based on what you see on tv, and never even meet even one person of who you're judging, it's ridiculous. and the sad thing is, people go by these morons instead of someone who knows the group...

and also, doesn't race not really matter? i mean, we're all people with eyes and ears and head and love and anger and sadness and families and brains...I think racism is the most utterly ridiculous, pointless thought train to ride...

the only people I'm really biased against are racists...does that make sense?

oh and to potential racists out there:

I AM NOT SORRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SCREW YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!thank you!

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