Tuesday, November 7, 2006

   not much going on
sorry i havnt posted in like forever. its only cuz i just got a myspace and im spending like all my time there instead of here. but il still stop by every day to check peoples sites and such i just might not post as much. Well iv been obsessing over this song for like 2 days now so here you go

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Wednesday, November 1, 2006

   yups actually happy today
oooo im much happier today. dont know why but i just am. well heres the song im obsessing over.

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Tuesday, October 31, 2006

   rawr
iv been easily gettin depressed and stuf lately. constant mood swings its like AAAAAAAAAAA.... i just wish something could make me happy.. and i could stay happy. I hate this. the second im finally happy... something happens to mess it up and im sad again. well here's the song iv been singin in my head a lot

yeah i feel like adding more songs cuz well whatever here you go....

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Thursday, October 26, 2006

ignore
ignore this post....i mean unlesss you wanna listen to the songs cuz they are awesome....




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   getting better
well i didnt write anything today... im just gonna be editing the other poems cuz the last 2 are pretty suckish. YESSS i have almost no homework today and i think i did ok on the test and quiz i had today. school is slowly getting better and YAY today and yesterday i finally got to talk to my bf for a while. but today at my lunch table... my one friend talked to me about how she didnt like how i was sad about my bf. cuz he lives so far away and i never get to see him... im ususaly kinda depressed i guess about it. and she doesnt wanna see me that way. she didnt mean i should break up with him she just wishes i wasnt sad. and then she was like WE'RE GONNA MAKE HIM MOVE UP HERE!!! yeah i wish it was that easy..... well i get to talk to him for a while today too. yay. oh and heres another song... its not the best but i still likes it

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Wednesday, October 25, 2006

   school
rawr i have had so much homework and no time to myself. i havnt been able to talk a lot with my bf in like forever. and life is just like really blah lately. well i hope it gets better because field hockey season is over. we were undefeated OH YEAH!!! well heres the song for today. i heard it on the bus and the guy sitting next to me started flirting with me. i was just htinking in my head hte whole time 'sorry but its a waste of time there. im taken MUAHAHAHA.' yeah and when it came to the part where they say something about flying.. he said he tried to fly once by jumping off his porch with paper bags. lol he just wanted to make me laugh. well heres the song...


oh and herers some more poetry i wrote today in class and such....

each second you're not with me
when i'm not lying in your arms
every breath i take brings pain
each beat of this dying heart
the blood coursing needles through my viens

each second brings a new eternity
filled with these shrieks of agony
rushing out of this lifeless corpse

this torture, lonly, silence
can i survive until the day
that my rescue comes to save me
from the eternal rain

you're my breath of life
the only reason this soul lives on
the only reason breath fills these strangled lungs
for the pain knows that someday
you'll come and cast it away

till then the screams refuse to stop
forever rippling through this empty abyss
the echos bouncing off the unseen walls
until the noise..
the echos..
DIE

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Tuesday, October 24, 2006

YAY
WOOOOT!! 200 VISITS!! thanks you so much everybody for visiting my site. 200 HITS WOOOT WOOOT!!! thanks again. oh and please read the poem from yesterday. and dont just say its good. tell me what you liked didnt like. i want constructive critisizm. and if you have a lot to say then just send me a pm. thanks for your time...

heres another poem but this really isnt as good.. i just wrote it in like a minute just free writing my feelings at the moment

THIS PAIN THE SURGE OF SCREAMS
each beat of this DYING HEART
its filled with LONELYNESS and SUFFERINGS

This EMPTYNESS its killing me
for every moment ALONE
gets worse as life moves along
NJEVER allowing this AGONY to stop
HOW MUCH LONGER CAN I HOLD ON?

and of course the song of the day

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Monday, October 23, 2006

   my thoughts
i wrote it last night.. tell me what you think

I thought the tears were over
I thought that they were through
Tried thinking of the good times
But still the pain, it grew

A tear falls for this lonelyness
Yet surrounded with love to boast
The only one who isnt here
Is the one that matters most

God,"Why," i ask,"why?"
Do my sufferings go on
This emptyness it's killing me
The sadness hasn't gone

Don't ask me to stop crying
Do you think i like this pain?
just hold me in your arms
I need rescued from the rain

I weep under this smiling mask
for no one understands
the empty eyes which do not see
these numb, frost bit hands

The storm that rages in my heart
im lost...
lost in nothingness...
yet I keep fighting
Then hope is gone, it's left my soul
to suffer.. slowly dying

This is just a rough copy, il fix it up a little and show you the final poem in a few days.
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Saturday, October 21, 2006

   im so tired AAAAAAAA
ok heres some funny stuff just kuz i feel like puttin it up...

oh and im extremely exhausted from the sleepover and my eyes are like totally blood shot and such. so im going to take a long nap. see yas.. and of course another song... oyh yeah you probably wont like this song but I LOVE IT!!!!


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Friday, October 20, 2006

   still stressed out
OMG i hate my science teacher!!! on the last test not one person got an A and there were at least 6 F's. She didnt even curve it! she teaches horribly and everybody hates her. This is what i feel like doing to her sometimes....

omg i just think that is so hilarious to watch. You may think its sick and twisted but i think its awesome. so yeah i love watching violent stuff WOOOOOOO!!! well im leaving at 5 today to go march with the band in a parade then we have our homecoming football game. Then im leaving early from the game to go to my field hockey sleepover because we were undefeated WOOOOOT!!! and then saturday is homecoming dance. im kind of looking forward to the dance but not really cuz my bf cant be there. :( well il tell you guys how everything goes oh sunday.... and heres another song

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