Wednesday, July 28, 2004

Mad World
All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places- worn out faces
Bright and early for their daily races
Going nowhere- going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expresion- no expression
Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow
No tomorrow- no tomorrow

And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very very
Mad world mad world

Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday- happy birthday
Made to feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen- sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me- no one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson
Look right through me- look right through me

And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very very
Mad word.......world
Enlarge your world
Mad world

I was feeling a little depressed, so I decided to type out this song just for the hell of it.

(Please be warned, mental breakdown may occur at any moment now. If you cannot stand listening to teenage angst, whining, and confusement, please turn back now. You have been warned.)

I'm just feeling really depressed. I feel like I'm all alone in the world. Almost like nobody really cares. I mean, I never have been and probably never will be a little social teen. I mean, I think the last time I had a girly slumber party was when I was in like....3rd or 4th grade. And I've never had a bf, or been kissed or anything. (Not that I'm overweight, or extremely ugly or anything, I'm just not the little "social teen" as I put it earlier.)So does that mean that if I go to every school function, and wear extremely revealing clothing, and talk to every single person I see, I won't feel lonely anymore?
Please excuse me while I crawl over to the nearest corner and just die.

*Puts on headphones and walks off, heading towards the kitchen to go consume a pint of Ben and Jerry's ice cream, crying and listening to Pete Yorn.* Later
Comments (1) | Permalink

   I'm so bored
i'm sooooooooooo bored right now.
i need someone to talk to. anyone who has aim, and is also bored can IM me. i really don't care who u r, i'm just soooooooo bored! all i'm doing right now is downloading mp3s, and those take forever, so I have nothing to do really.
alright...well......thanx i guess.

right now my bunny is sitting on my lap watching me type. its cute.......but also a little disturbing since my bunny doesn't blink at all.
so yeah...........that's all really. so if you have aim.....pleeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaase IM me, thank you.
later
Comments (3) | Permalink

   I'm not laughing, I just felt like using it
I'm happy right now.
I got a new mp3 downloaded. The Neon Genesis Evangelion Theme. Yay!
Also, I took this quiz to see how obsessed with Inu Yasha you are, and I got 100%, so i'm really proud of myself about that.
Yesterday, I burnt the eggs that I was going to make.
That was random, but I felt like saying it.
Also, last night I saw this commercial that I really liked. It was of this girl in a hot dog suit handing out flyers about "greening" up the earth and stuff. And everyone laughed at her when they walked by, and threw away her flyers and stuff. So she just gave up and walked off, and she came to this crosswalk, and on the other side was this guy in a Pepsi can suit. And they waved to eachother, and in the end they were walking down this street hand-in-hand. I thought it was kind of cute......I want that sort of thing to happen to me. Or atleast some sort of shoujo anime, cliche, coincidence. But alas, my life sucks.

A friend invited me over to her house today, and I don't have a ride over there, so I have to ride my bike which really sucks, but luckily its all downhill or straight, except for this one big hill.

Well, I think I'm going to go make myself some breakfast, even though its 12:00 in the afternoon. My internal clock (is that what it's called?)is so screwed up. I went to bed at like.....4 in the morning, woke up at 11:00 or something, and now I'm making myself breakfast in the afternoon when I should be having lunch. And I'm not even tired. But hey, thats my world.

I think I might cosplay for my senior prom.
Comments (1) | Permalink

Tuesday, July 27, 2004

I haven't really done much that would interest anyone.
my dad just left for canada yesterday, and my mom is working, so me and my sister are pretty much home alone for the week.
my sister found this mp3 that i had been wanting for awhile. i'm so happy now ^_^. its from ghost in the shell stand alone complex; inner universe.
i might find some more mp3s that i've been wanting later today.
i've just started on my english homework. i have to write a journal over the summer pretty much, so i just started yesterday. luckily though i really didn't do anything that interesting, so i don't have to write that much.

last night me and my sister stayed up until like....1 in the morning watching Free Willy the movie. lmao. its a lame movie i know, but we were bored.

well, i have to give the comp up to my sis so she can go IM some of her friends. i might make eggs and watch a movie, i'm not really sure.
later
Comments (0) | Permalink

Saturday, July 24, 2004

   okay, this is a summary of my pissy day.
woke up, got online, got kicked off the comp by my mom who made me vaccum and load and unload the dishwasher. at first i had no problem with doing these things, but the entire time she was yelling at me and lecturing me about how i should know to do these things without being asked to do them.
then she yelled at me about spending so much time on the computer, so i got dressed and told her that i was going to go for a walk, and then she yelled at me and said that i had to go to this party for a friend with her.
i got there, and the only people there were old, and they were all sitting in lawn chairs in a circle on the lawn. so i had to sit their and endure their never ending boring pointless conversations. then the food came, (hamburgers blech!, hot dogs blech!, pasta blech!) so there wasn't anything there to eat that i liked, besides egg salad. then the dessert table came out. disgusting looking cupcakes, store bought cakes that said happy birthday (might i remind you that noone there was having a birthday, go figure.). blech again.
luckily my mom brought her cell phone, so i called a friend but unfortunately lost connection. then i played the game snake on her cellphone until we left.
now i'm home, and i'm going to make cookies (peanut butter ones.). i've never made cookies by myself, so now i'm going to make some and they're going to be all for me. yay!

Comments (2) | Permalink

Friday, July 23, 2004

   Ok, I just got AIM and I'm really excited. So, after I sign up and everything, I realize that none of my friends irl have AIM, so I have noon to talk to.
So, if anyone who has AIM happens to come by my site, could you IM me, plz! I'm sooooooooo bored right now!
Thank you.

Today really sucked because I took my bunny out of its cage, and put it on my bed. And it peed on the bed, so I had to change the sheets.
Also, tonight is the opening night of this play that my sister is in (Pirates of Penzance)< plz excuse my poor spelling if that is incorrect. The guy who plays the main character is really cute, and he's also into anime, and I really want to ask him out. Grr. Life sucks.

Yesterday when I was in the car on the highway, there was this car that passed by and there was this kid in the car (such a cutey too ^_^) and he was smiling and waving at me.I couldn't stop smiling afterwards; and it was only a simple little wave, and it made my day.
Also, yesterday I went to this circus, and there was this guy there and he commented on my socks (knee-high plaid pink/navy with some yellow), and he said that I had a very original look, and to keep rocking on. That just rocked! I was so happy afterwards. It was kind of like the kid who waved to me, it just made my day, but it was just a little comment on what I was wearing.
The little things in life truly are the best.
*sigh* now back to the boring, depressing life i lead.
Comments (1) | Permalink

Tuesday, July 20, 2004

   The Twilight Zone
i saw some of the twilight zone this morning. its pretty cool really.

ummm.....besides that i've pretty much done nothing today. i've sat in my room playing video games, gotten online, and eaten food.

last night i fell asleep with my headphones on. so i woke up this morning with the hives screaming in my ears (yeeaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh! hate to say i told you so; alright!)
then i fell back asleep and woke up at 8:30, which is really early for me. (actually i was supposed to wake up at 7 this morning to go somewhere.)

i might go see i robot tomorrow with some friends. if anyone has seen it, can you tell me how it is before i waste $6. (i'm trying to save to go to japan when i'm a junior in highschool. i might go with a friend, i'm not sure yet.)

Comments (0) | Permalink

Monday, July 19, 2004

   I wrote this last night....around 3 in the morning listening to some depressing music....i didn't really think about it all that much, i didn't make any corrections, and i didn't read any of it until i finished.
i'll accept any criticism, good or bad.


Don't ask me where I'm going.
I'm already gone and there.
Don't ask me how I'm doing.
I'm not quite sure myself.
Don't ask me if I need help.
I'm stronger than you think.
Don't ask me if I'm crying.
I'd never show the hurt inside.
Don't ask me for the time.
I've stopped counting.
Don't ask me what's going on in the world.
I've lost touch of reality.
Don't ask me if my grades are good.
I've stopped trying.
Don't ask me for my number.
I won't answer the phone.
Don't ask me to come over Friday night.
I won't show up.
Don't ask me what I need.
I'll only tell you what I want.
Don't ask me to keep you company.
I'll only bore you to death.
Don't ask me what I dreamed about last night.
I will only scare you.
Don't ask me if it hurts.
I'm completely numb
Don't ask me to explain.
Its more complicated than you think.
Don't ask me anything.
I'll only tell you lies.


On a happier note, I'm eating this brilliant ice cream sandwich. But it's not a normal ice cream sandwich. Normal ice cream sandwiches only have on flavor, vanilla (or occasionally chocolate.) But this ice cream sandwich has vanilla, chocolate, AND strawberry ice cream in it.
That's just made my day. ^_^
Comments (0) | Permalink

Sunday, July 18, 2004

Results

The following table divides a general personality into four aspects. Your personality aspects are shown in the middle column of the table. Each aspect's compatiblity with Rei is shown in the far-right column, and you can look at these to get a rough idea of your overall compatiblity.

Your Personality Aspects:
Aspect Category Your Aspect Compatibility With Rei
Abstract/Concrete ABSTRACT COMPATIBLE
Introvert/Extrovert INTROVERT COMPATIBLE
Logical/Emotional LOGICAL COMPATIBLE
Dominant/Submissive SUBMISSIVE COMPATIBLE

You are most like the Evangelion character: Rei Ayanami


You are like Rei herself in all the major personality aspects. So, if Rei were real you'd find that the both of you could get along with each other, whatever that means. Submissive Introverts, like yourself and Rei, often have a hard time taking the initiative to be with each other, but once they trust each other their friendship tends to become very strong.

You are 99% compatible with Rei.
Comments (0) | Permalink

Saturday, July 17, 2004

last night around like....1 or 2 in the morning i finished drawing on a shirt. its of Rena from .hack, and on the back is the quote that i had been wanting to put on a t-shirt. (check previous previous post)
so yeah...i wore it today.
i also dyed my hair black yesterday.

today i went to this race that a couple of my friends were in. it was rather pointless, but it gave me a reason to yell really loudly.
after the race there was a parade ....that was also pointless. obnoxious fire trucks, old cars that people show off, politicians, and these after school program floats.
i couldn't get any candy because there were like a million kids sitting in front of me who got to the candy first, and if i grabbed a piece of candy from them, their mothers would most likely yell at me, and the kid would probably cry, and i just wasn't up for that. so i ended up buying my own bag of candy at the grocery store.
i got a slushie ^_^
then i went over to my friends house where i played her ps2 for awhile. (kingdom hearts. i love the intro)

and now i'm exhausted....

Comments (0) | Permalink