Thursday, June 21, 2007

bad day.....
today, my grandfather died. he was going to be 80 years old this year, suffered from a blood clot in his brain, stroke, and other health problems, and this morning, he died from a heart attack while mowing his lawn. he was found by one of my grandma's piano students.
it's kind of unreal. and in all honesty, i am more upset by the fact that i'm NOT upset....i suppose i feel like i'm supposed to be really sad, and i should be with my dad and brother crying like nobody's business. but i find i can't even be at my dad's house right now. the whole house has a feeling of sadness.
frankly, my grandpa was a firm follower of the mormon religion, so i know that as he died, he knew in his heart he would go to a better place. we all have our time, and it was his. i don't feel horribly sad about it. it's just the way life is. "death is but the next great adventure," and simply what follows our life on earth. whether something actually happens after death, i don't know. but i'm content knowing my grandfather felt he'd experience something great after his time on earth.
So, Grandpa Elzo, my last words to you were "i love you, and see you soon." and that still holds true. but we may not see each other as soon as i had hoped.


okay, that's enough philosophy and mourning for today, i think.
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Wednesday, June 20, 2007

okay, so this rant has been a long time coming, and here it fianlly is.
Matthew Shepherd was left beaten near death in a lonely cold field in Laramie, Wyoming in October of 1998. why? because he was gay.
now, if you want more info, google his name, but now is time for a rant.
back in about february, i was working with my theater director/teacher trying to push to get the school board to allow us to perform "The Laramie Project" a play about Matthew Shepherd. they made the decision that our town is not ready for something like that, especially following HJR2 (the amendment to our state constitution that prohibits gay marriage, ALL domestic partnerships and ALL civil unions). and what did i just find out? nearby school districts have performed pieces on teen suicide, and we were allowed to perform a show called "Juvie" all aobut kids in juvie. that encompassed manslaughter, murder, drugs, alcohol, kidnapping. but we couldn't perform something true about a young man who lost his life to two homophobes?!?!?!
okay, like i said, a rant a long time coming, but there it is

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Wednesday, June 6, 2007

it's really over?
i have just graduated high school. and it is entirely unreal to me....13 years (if you include kindergarten) has been focused solely around me going to school. and now, that chapter of my life closes, and i enter into a world of choice and oppurtunity. one where i choose how i wish to continue my education--a major of theater arts, secondary education--and it is entirely up to me. no longer is the school board telling me what i can and can't do. sure there are core classes, but more, core subjects. and i choose the class myself. i simply need to fit a certain category.
the graduation ceremony was pretty cool, and we all threw a beach ball up into the air at the end and bounced it aroun to each other. it really wasn't too bad at all.
just, wow. i'm still in shock. i didn't cry, though, although a few of my classmates did. i had to sit next to one of the special ed kids, tony. during the national anthem he yelled "what the hell?!" shortly followed by "goddamnit" so that helped liven things too, lol.
well, that's really it for now. anyone else just graduate, or about to?
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Wednesday, May 30, 2007

oh god, do i love cosplay!!!!!
yesterday, mandy ashley and i went fabric shopping, and got mandy's shion fabric^^ i'm still not sure what fabric i want to use for albedo....*shrugs* we'll figure it out.

other than focusing on xenosaga cosplay, we worked on some planning for our .hack//g.u. group as well. we've got, so far, a kuhn (mandy), endrance(ashley), atoli(talyn), saku(melany)and sakaki(me(why am i always the bad guy?! lol)) hopefully, we have mel as silabus, and cheese as haseo. and holly would make a beautiful kaede.
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Sunday, May 27, 2007

so, my stepmom and stepsisters are going to pirates 3 today....and i'm not sure if i'm going ot join them. why? b/c i don't think i want to go to a movie with them....ANY movie. they're frustrating as hell, the lot of them.
also, i've heard a lot of mixed reviews for pirates from my friends. everything from it being the best of the three to being a huge dissappointment. but i'll probly see it soon anyway. what have you guys (those who've seen it)thought?

other than that, not much going on. my stepmom bought me DDR supernova b/c i finished high school. so i've been playing that a fair bit in the past few days. and my "friend" bought me...."best lesbian erotica '07" she just showed up with presents for those of us who's birthdays she missed (she's at a different school now b/c she was cutting cuz she was being teased about her obesity, or something. and btw. she. is. huge. no one can deny. don't care if that sounds mean, b/c she's morbidly obese. no joke) anyhoos, she has a history of giving me bad presents. like fuzzy handcuffs and sex dice. now "best lesbian erotica" yippy skippy. and apparently, she had considered getting me some sort of bondage/fetish kit! *dies*

okay, so i realize this is getting kinda long. sorry guys, i'll shut up.

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