Wednesday, September 7, 2011

AGE STRETCHMARKS
So I'm pretty. damn. busy. n I love it.
I feel like I'm 22.
Except for the part where I still live with my mom (but my brother's almost 35 n he's back home too) And that I'm in Introduction classes for my degree instead of it being finished.

I just feel like that because of how quickly I've grown in the past year.

Just in 2011 I've gotten 2 jobs, I own my car and have the insurance in my name as well as paid for it all myself. So technically I have a BILL. yea A bill, I should savor it for until I have more lol. I was also on food stamps for a few months, and wrote my first check to pay for my fuckin books at school.
I worked a full time job + overtime for that one 12 days in a row + a part time job all at once. It was hell n my body sure took a toll from that; I lost 15 pounds (not good since I'm normally only 110) and went through a CARTON of cigarettes during that 12 days. *cough cough*

And right now I'm so busy because I have a part time job (Target), a 3rd shift job once a week (State Fair Security), I'm a full time student now in my degree department, and I have to accumulate 24 hours of community service for that degree.

This very busy-ness of work n school n somehow still broke-ed-ness is probably good in the way it should be, because I'm still at home, saving small morsels of money at a time, n is dimming the flame on the baby fever. Ot that at least my rational brain is so occupied. It's how it should be.
Plus I realized today through my instructor that to be in the Human Services field is to be like a parent. You have to care for the client, teach them confidence, self esteem, how to be self sufficient, and then eventually the clients will be on their own or in someone else's hand. And like a mother role, alot of these clients haven't had anyone else that really cared for them or someone to trust.
But getting to that point in the profession will be 6-10 years from now. Baby could be sooner, n would slow school down, because I would still have to work, but my biggest worry is not having money to be on my own; I wouldn't want to live with my mom with my baby, and I would be afraid of the little time I would hae with it, due to school and work. Daycare I'm not concerned because my moms retired LOL but I wouldn't want to rely on her financially at all. I hate having to now, honestly.
Comments (0)