Tuesday, July 12, 2005

   hi!

Do you all know what click beetles are? They're all over my house! I've never seen them before in my life but now I'm visited by one every night! It just sits up at the top of the wall, near the ceiling. Just sits there. Every night. And it's not there during the day. And I'm not hallucinating. I have on in a bug jar to prove it. And there was just another one that eluded my capture... Bastardous insects. HA! I caught the little bastard! *sneers at bug* Mo-fo! Let's see you evade me again! Stankin' freaky little mo-fo! I'll have to let these little mo-fo's outside tomorrow... Stanky little mofos. Now, on to why I actually intended to post... I only have two votes on my new art! Go look at it, dammit! Please! Awesome! Click beetle battles! Like in Dr. Suess! Beetles battle in a bottle! One of the beetles in my jar just went over to the other beetle and the other beetle chased it away and was chasing after it until it was satisfactorally away. Like, on the other side of the jar. But stupid beetle #1 keeps going over to beetle #2. I wonder if one's a boy and one's a girl? Maybe I can witness CLICK BEETLE PORN! I saw praying mantis porn on Animal Planet today. Then Mrs. Mantic ate Mr. Mantis for lunch. Yumm... let me devour your brain while you're having sex with me! Sorry... Oh my God! One click beetle is on its back! I missed it! I bet Bitchy Beetle flipped Curious Beetle! He can't get up! Get up, Curious Beetle! Get up! AWWW! *everyone cheers* He got up! Long Live Curious Click Beetle! I think Curious Click Beetle is a boy and Bitchy Beetle is a girl. Aw, hell! Curious Click Beetle got up on the side of a sheer plastic wall! Then he FELL! Stoopid! Oh my God! They're BOTH going up the sides! One made it all the way to the top! Then he FELL! STOOPID! And he landed on his BACK! STOO-PID! And he had to CLICK to get back UPRIGHT. STOO-PID!!! Okay... No more Click Beetle Chronicles. Inuyasha's on in fifteen minutes and I've got things to do, people to see... Click Beetle porn to miss out on when I go in the living room and leave the click beetles in here to do the dirty deed... Curious Click Beetle seems hell-bent on it... Sorry. I know you don't want to know about the sex lives of a couple random insects I caught off my dining room wall... But it was amusing for me to write... And we all know it's good for me to stay amused! It's ESSENTIAL for me to stay amused! OR WE'LL ALL DIE! MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Curious Click Beetle is chasing Bitchy Beetle.

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