Wednesday, March 8, 2006

  

WOOHOO! People bitched at me! For all my "everyone loves me" shit, I think I piss off a lot more people than I realize. It's not MY fault I have the occasional swing into "BAD" mood... Normally I'm so happy that I couldn't give a shit if I piss people off or if they bitch at me. I'm in that kind of mood now. I read my comments, and smiled. I smiled at the ones attacking me. I smiled at the ones defending me. I smile, with bright shiny green eyes filled with happiness. In fact, I had a blister appear overnight the night before last, and I took the bandaid off this morning and it looked like a heart. It made me happy. Stung like a bitch, but it made me happy. I have a four-day weekend. It makes me happy. I had two easy-as-shit quizzes today. They made me happy. I did nothing in all my other classes. That made me happy. I almost had a heart attack when my friend threw a packet of skittles at me. That made me laugh until I almost died. My story got read aloud to the class by the teacher. It was better than I thought it was. That made me happy. It was also the only happy story of the four, and the only one that met the standards for the contest, therefore probably the only one of the class that will get published. That makes me happy. Everyone else's stories were about: 1) a bounty hunter. 2) a rape victim who murders her attacker. 3) a nonhuman kid which psychological problems who ended up ripping out this guy's liver and becoming the best serial killer ever. Mine... was about a freshman in high school who went to fetch his teddy bear from his sister's room. It makes me happy. Today, my research for my paper went nowhere. I got probably five or ten more sources that may or may not be helpful... I got on the computer and just clicked on things that might look helpful and printed them... it makes me laugh. I don't know what I'm doing my paper on. That makes me laugh too. I'm gonna try to figure that out this weekend and start actually directing my efforts... There was this one article I saw that said "Japan tackles flight rights of the mentally ill"... It, too, made me laugh, but I didn't feel like reading it. Incidentally, the paper body has to be five pages at least, with a cover page and bibliography page, and parenthetical citation where appropriate. Which is basically everywhere. That makes me frown. I have a headache. It makes me sad. I don't know when Brokeback Mountain comes out on DVD. That makes me frown. Memoirs of a Geisha comes out on DVD March 28th... That makes me excited. I'm stating my emotions about every single thing I say, just so you know how I feel about everything. It makes me laugh. Incidentally, I don't get stressed, I get angry. Anger = strong inclination towards violence against others. Stress = strong inclination towards violence against self. I would never hurt myself with the intention of feeling pain. I won't explain that last. ~SJ "I see hell in your eyes. Taken in by surprise. Touching you makes me feel alive. Touching you makes me die inside."

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