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Birthday
• 1987-07-03
Gender
• Male
Location
• norwich uk
Member Since
• 2005-05-18
Occupation
• student
Real Name
• Siwou

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Achievements
• I screw up everything, I hate it!
Anime Fan Since
• since I was 16
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• vampire hunter D
Goals
• to die alone in peace
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• drawing anime, photography, writing poetry
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• drawing, photography, poetry, wisdom




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myOtaku.com: shadowmemory

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I'm the dispondant shadow memory, artist, I draw what I see and not what reality wants me to see, I am not all sane and hate the outside world and society or human virus of life. hate me or ignore me, for its all I know in this life. art in all shape and forms are metaphorhs windows to a better and more beautiful place, thats why we draw so much and concentrate so hard on are work, we can't stand this life so we create a window to view a better rather than viewing are own.


Thursday, May 19, 2005

feeling hollow and alone...
I've just gotten worse inside of me, I feel dispondant and weak, like a string ready to snap. all my mental angious has spawned and released all over me, I can't take who I am anymore, I can't take this pain and pressure the strain of loosing her has devastated me, all of my thoughts of past perpetual nightmares compell into me. I'm sick of going into hospitals I'm sick of failing, I'm sick of everything turning bad, I'm sick of being alone. its destroying me so much, and these pills arn't helping. there just making it worse. I've given it deep thought and decided to run away from my family and find some where to die. I don't want to be here anymore, I don't want to look at the same page of repition. I've collided into a vortex of nightmares. somthing I'm so tired and weak of fighting. so I send my fair wells to the ones who cared and the ones who were glad that this would happen. I knew from an early age in my life I was never welcomed and never could succeed, so I bury myself in the madness of my defeat. self affliction fade, memories decay, as I sleep forever in my grave.
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Wednesday, May 18, 2005

   meh hello
I went to the doctors few days ago to have a cat scan, don't know who, but orders are orders, I hate the doctors, I've been growing up in them all my life, I just wish they leave me alone, -to die in peace- anyways due to my manic depression and suicidal tendancies
I've been put on some pills, I've gotten major sleep deprivation and feeling more isolated and dead than usual. it feels most times I don't even exist. anyways heres a pic I drew of "Saya" from the anime movie "blood, the last vampire" enjoy, or hate, but please be nice, I can't stand anymore insult and jabs from society mouth of mediocrity and hatred.
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