Friday, September 2, 2005

   TGIFRICKINF NA NO DA!!!!!!!!!!
Thank the powers that be, this week is OVER! Geez. That was stressful. *cries* Oh well. I'm really pumped now. I always am on Fridays. It's cause I got a three day weekend, too! *dances to Sleepless Beauty* My hoooooney Ryuichi!!!! *gets death glare from Roy* Erm...ha ha...oops?

Well! I need to get writing the next chappy for my fic for FMA before my readers flip out. I'm really excited about Sunday and my mom can't stop telling me how excited she is. I swear to god, just for this one day, she won't get mad at me for months. XD of course, that's not what it's about. I know that. I drew a cute picture that I call "The Warren Chibi Circus" (Warren is my last name, for those who don't know. It's german!) neways, and my mom loves it. She wants me to put it in plastic. XD I'm on the elephant(I was obsessed with them when I was a kid) Erik is the clown, my mom is the ringmaster, Kyle is the lion, Jeremy is the flying trapieze guy and my dad is sleeping. XD I wasn't sure whether to put my dad in or not. At first I didn't...but then I decided to. When my mom saw that I had added my dad, she seemed really happy-yet sad. I felt the same way.

Well, I don't remember having any dreams. That's good. Oh! *imitates K from Gravitation* "BIG NEWS!" (he even says it in English. XD) Anyway, yes, BIG NEWS! My mom has finally had enough of Erik. Last night he said to her "You're so far up on my back about everything that I can't even see my asshole." and she found out he's been spending shitloads of money on fast food when he goes out with Gina and shit for his car...and he's given her nothing at all. So she's had it. He has until Monday to remove every scrap of shit from thsi computer and then he has until Janurary 1st to move out. OH! And when she breaks it to him, she's going to have Gina here, so she can see what a bastard she's getting involved with. Cause my mom says Gina isn't so great, but even she doesn't deserve that. She was really sad yesterday. Cause it is. It's sad that it has come to this. It's sad that Erik has made himself into this...monster. It's sad...that he's made us so angry at him. I eman...*looks at the bank statement* Max Madsen, 7-11, Panera Bread, Taco Bell, Pizza Hut, Autozone, Mm Tools, Lalo's Restaurant, 7-11 again, Blockbuster, blockbuster again, Riverside Mman, autozone, Arby's, autozone, Riverside Mman again, pizza hut again, etc etc. That's just one moth. The next is even worse. Oh, and Walgreens for $2.75...hmmm...condoms maybe? *shrugs* dumbass. Oh well. He'll get his. And I'm going to act like nothing's up, and let my mom take care of it.

Thank goodness, my mom went grocery shopping and got crud today. Jeremy and I will have to go to the Jewel and get soda and chips, though. *dies* lol She left me money for it. ^^ Well, let's see if my scanner will scan some shit, huh? Oh, I also got the idea to draw the FMA cast in pokemon suits. Don't kill me. *hides behind Roy* So when I get to that, I'll scan that, too. ^^ Ja ne!
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*Ryuichi takes a peak at what Shuichi is drawing* "What's THAT, Shuichi?! It's so small and not even shiny! I'll fix it!" *he takes it and turns his back to Shuichi* "Pika(shiny) pika pika pika shuichi shuichi pika pika, TA DA!" *he holds up the picture which now has sparkles and says "Shiny Shuichi", and his voice goes DUN DUN DUN serious!* "This is a song."
*Shuichi stares*
*his silly voice again* "Let's make it more shiney, no da!"
~If there's anything I hate, it's when people make it like Ryuichi is just a dumb guy with split personality and Yuki is just an asshole. There's so much more to the complex characters. But we'll save that rant for another day.~
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These three are from the FMA game that you should NEVER buy because all the endings are sad, even though it's a bit yaoi and contains no Winry that I know of.




He's my favorite Shinigami from Bleach. At first he didn't even want to be one, and then he became a CAPTAIN. Holy shit. So, I'm really curious for 47. But OMFG isn't he the cutest thing?! *squees!* but, he's always unhappy...so I'm really x_x. OH, and he's played by Ed's Jap voice actor and since he's as short as Ed...XD it's just SO cute! *beathes* Okay, I'm fine, I swear. *dies*
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Thursday, September 1, 2005

   *yawn*
Bored, tired, and updating from school on my lunch. I don't eat anyways. And it gives me a chance to leave friends messages-they don't want us doing email. ¬_¬ Not much is going on-school is stupid. I WANNA GO HOME RIGHT NOW YOU BASTARDS!!! I have yet to learn much of anything new. My mom is a science freak and she loves physics, so she has a million books. I read them, and boom! I know the stuff. x_x oh well.

I had two creepy dreams. One was, you know how New Orleans is uder water now? Well, I dreamed I was in a place, a city, that was all flooded over. and me and some other people I didn't know had to steal to survive until someone found us. So we broke into grocery stores and got things that were packaged well that we could eat. Like chips and stuff, ya know? It was weird. It all reminds me a little of that movie The Day After Tomorrow.

My second dream was really scary. It wasn't Christmas, I don't think, but we were hosting a party...and our house seemed bigger. Everything was going pretty well, I didn't even know half the people, but then Jeremy goes nuts and he starts shooting at us all with a gun. So I do some crazy roll from movies, grab a gun, and start shooting him, trying to take him down so he'll stop. But he doesn't stop. It's so weird. And then I realize my gun is shooting only water. I don't know if his was, but I got him down on the ground and he still wouldn't give up. He kept struggling to continue shooting at everyone...

I hate my dreams lately...they're all bad. This happened to me once before. I had all nightmares...every night...something must be going on. Perhaps I'm even unaware of it? Once I fixed whatever problem I had during the nightmares before, they stopped and left me to weird, but not unpleasent dreans. But I don't know what to do this time to make these go away.

Erik's going to an interview this morning, I believe. He told us he's going for an interview at a dealership, but he lied. I know because I saw the paper. He's trying to get into marketing. With Gina. He lied about a shitload of stuff on his resume. He says he speaks german, english, spanish, and czech. HA! My ass. He speaks english, and spanish. He can make small conversation in tagalog or whatever. And he knows a few words in thai and chinese. And he claims he's studdied martial arts for twelve years. 12 YEARS! My god. He's going to be a liar all his life. Anyways, so I found the paper and I know he's going to a marketing interview and he lied right to my mom's face and told her it was a dealership interview. So my mom says we'll let him stick to his lie and see how long he can keep it up. Heehee. He deserves it. CRAP! Times almost up. Luckily I can still leave you pics!
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*singing* "Na no na no da! Na no na-oh?" *he crouches down* "Looks like we've come to a dead end!"
"No, Ryuichi, it's just a dead person in the road."
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Wednesday, August 31, 2005

   Gah.
Well, this morning my mood wasn't so great, but then it got better when my mom and I went to the bank at around 4:30ish. She had to take out yet ANOTHER loan, but it's $5000 that we didn't have, so...yeah. And I got the money from my M.O. from Luna so now I have my $150, and I'm going with my mom on Sunday. So, we were in a pretty good mood, which lead us to go to the grocery store and get chips and stuff. No soda though. *cries* So we're in this good mood, but then...(WARNING: RANT)we come home and see asswipe's bright yellow piece of shit he calls a cool car, and we go inside and find him and Gina sitting close together on the piano bench while he plays something lame like chopsticks or whatever and he wasn't even doing it right. So my mom got mad because she's told him lots of times not to have people in the house when she isn't home-especially girls. Erik tells us he's "just waiting for Jeremy." We find out he bought Jeremy cookies to take to some girl he likes. We tell Jeremy he has to be back by 6:45 cause he told us he'd watch Kyle while we're at class for two hours. Jeremy said he would, but apparenty Erik tells him on his way out "Don't worry about it. We'll watch Kyle." so Jeremy leaves and doesn't worry about it. We find this out and we're PISSED. My mom tells him there's no way in hell he's going to be in this house alone with a girl. He says "Well, Kyle would be here." Kyle is 10 FRICKIN YEARS OLD! All he'd have to do is: "Kyle, why don't you play video games in the kitchen!" "okay!" and he could screw her on the couch or whatever. Disgusting. So my mom told him that just doesn't work. And now, thanks to him, we don't have anyone to watch Kyle. So we end up having to dump him on my grandfather. He wasn't thrilled, but he said he would. So kyle took a movie with or whatever. My grandfather has old guns from WW2, which he was in, so Kyle loves to see those and stuff. Anyways, so while we were calling around to be able to put kyle somewhere, Erik sits out there on the front porch with Gina(aka Bitch) and so while they're there, I play something pretty and complicated on the piano, and just as I suspected, he took her down the stairs and out to his car and they sat out there. Now, Kyle...remember i said "It must be nice...not to understand." but, now that I think about it, it also ISN'T nice. Because he doesn't understand what Erik's doing. He says "i like Erik and Gina." but only because he doesn't understand. But yeah, so they finally left, him taking off like a bat out of hell as per usual. Then me and my mom go to class, and we told him he better not come back and be in the house with her while we're gone. But we come home and guess who's on the piano bench again? So, needless to say, we're really mad at him. I'm sick of him bringing that bitch here. And now Jeremy's heading down the path of becoming his little carbon copy. It's all about girls, girls, girls, and more god damned girls! The male population needs to get a frickin' LIFE-no offense. It's not true of everyone. But yeah. Okay, rant over.

I told my mom I'm sick of everything going worng. We can never have a NICE day-there's always something getting messed up. I bet we'll come home from Renaissance Faire and there will be something to kill our happy spirits. Oh well-best not to think about it, right? There's supposedly a rainbow after every storm...maybe the storm's still going after four years, but we have yet to see any rainbow.
-----------------------------------
Here's the whole quote that I couldn't remember earlier:
"What if I told you God and the Devil made a wager-a kind of standing bet for the souls of all mankind?"
"I'd tell you to stay on your meds."
"Humor me. No direct contact, that would be the rule. Just infulence."
"Okay, I'm humoring you. Why?"
"I don't know-for fun maybe?"
"Oh, so it's fun. It's fun when a man beats his wife to death. It's fun when a woman drowns her own baby...and you think the 'devil' is responsible. People are evil, Mr. Constantine. People."
"You're right-we're born capable of terrible things. And then something else comes along that gives us just the right nudge."
"Well, it's been really educational, but I don't believe in the devil."
"You should-he believes in you."
~Constantine~
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Apparently photobucket isn't working right now, so no pics...gomen.
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Tuesday, August 30, 2005

   End Daymare #2.
Well, today wouldn't have been so bad if it wasn't for last night. Just thinking about it puts me in a nasty mood. Erik(aka asswipe) went out to the movies and whatever with Gina last night, and took Jeremy along. For three simple reasons: money, trying to make him like Gina, and making it so Jeremy is just as bad as he is. Everyone was in bed at 1 AM when they got home, but I was still partly awake. They came through the back door, something my mom told Erik not to do anymore because it's sneaky and he just does it so no one knows what time he gets home. And then Erik was using his stupid cell phone as a flashlight which was REALLY bright and flashing it all over the place and Jeremy turned on the computer which made it even brighter. Even ignoring the fact that they were noisey, I need it to be dark to sleep. So I get up and tell him to close his damn phone and for them both to go to bed. They wouldn't. After Jeremy got off the computer, Erik went on there. The whole while Erik was being a total bastard. I tell him he has five minutes to go to bed before I wake my mom up and we start some shit that doesn't have to get started. After five minutes I said "Time's up, asshole." and I woke my mom up. He turned the computer off and ran downstairs as quickly as possible. However, he came back up and accused me of snopping in his room. But, I informed him that it was kyle, who was looking for some of Erik's old toys(and money, but he doesn't need to know that.) And then my mom argued with him for an hour. I stayed out of most of it, but at the end I included myself because it was just too ridiculous. And he talks so ghetto I'm going to be sick. "Ease up off my back about it." he says. He claims he doesn't chores around the house because of me. I said "Wait, so you're telling me, you don't take out the garbage because you don't like me?" And he said "That's right." My mom told him it was childish and he says, as is his FAVORITE phrase, "I don't care." At the end, I told him two things. First off "You put Gina above EVERYONE and EVERYTHING else, and respect her more than you respect your own mother. Hell, you respect HER mother more than you respect your own. That's MESSED. UP." And he just imitated me like the asshole he is. And then i told him "If you don't feel the slightest bit of regret that you're making your own family hate you, if that doesn't even hurt you at all, there's something seriously wrong." He says, sarcastically "Don't cry about it." he claims I always sound like I'm about to cry. But I didn't cry at all, not even close. I was more angry than sad. My mom says the only reason she hasn't kicked him out is because she feels bad for him. But then i wonder...how can you feel bad for someone who has no respect for you? Oh well. She says he has to be out of here in six months. Thank god-or something.

okay, that was my rant for the day. lol I hope you're all doing well. Take care. Ja ne!
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"Oh, right. So it's fun when a man beats his wife to death, it's fun when a woman drowns her own baby...and you think the 'devil' is responsible. People are evil, Mr. Constantine. People."
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Monday, August 29, 2005

   What a nightmare.
Well, let me tell you, I'm SO glad the first day is over. As predicted, I hate all of my classes except for Advanced Vocal Ensemble and Physics. Sorry, i'm a science freak. Other than that, classes sucked, teachers sucked, people sucked. I knew maybe two people. We got a whole set of new dillweeds in Advanced Vocal, since a lot of the people in there were seniors. You have to audition to get in, but it looks like he must not have had very much to pick from. *gags* A bunch of idiots with no talent. It's going to suck teaching these brats the ropes. There's only...four of us that weren't seniors. So...we're rather outnumbered in our tiny 15 person ensemble. How ridiculous. *cries for the seniors to come back* Nick Hollinger in there is pretty cute. I liked him more last year though. And he has a great sense of humor, personality, and voice. *melts* That's all I'll ever want in a guy. AND he plays guitar! But, his best friend is an asshole that hates me, so...it'll never happen. *cries* Dammit.

Well, anyways, I'm not even going to bother talking about school EVER if I can help it. Unless soemthing exciting happens, which I doubt. I did see all those happy kids, though. Not only is it depressing, but it makes me wonder...Am I the only one who doesn't want to be here? I just can't get into school. I can't love it like I love anime or singing. I can't sit and happily do it for hours like I can drawing or piano. It's just...not fun? Horrid? I don't know. It seems like each year the Freshies are more and more corrupted than the year before. What the hell is with kids these days?

On a side note, ALL of my brothers were assholes to me today when I got home, so I was a bit depressed...okay, a lot depressed. Like hide-in-my-room-and-blast-Evanescence-so-no-one-can-hear-me-crying depressed. Well, no, I won't say I was really depressed. I was angry. REALLY angry. Oh well. Then I just read a bit and i was okay. I'm still mad at them. And thanks to them getting em so angry, I ahven't gotten any of my chores done. I have a tiny bit of homework, but it's just that "get to know you" bullshit. I hate teachers that do too much of that. I mean, a little "say your name and something you like to do" is okay, but having to chat with kids you don't know and fill out worksheets on what they like or playing a bazillion name games is just...ugh. Even a shower didn't cure my problems today, and that's saying a lot.

I had another weird dream. I was in Japan and walking with this girl to her house. Problem was, we couldn't find it. Somehow, I got her all the way to the USA, to my HOUSE, just to go online to Yahoo! Japan and look up directions. Now THAT'S messed up.

On a happier note, I did finally update one of my stories on FFN last night when I couldn't sleep. But, due to my living nightmare I feel like I've hit a wall and someone cut out my brain and put it in a blender. Oh well...milkshake for brains is better than nothing at all.
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Don't want your hand this time
I'll save myself.
Maybe I'll wake up for once.
Not tormented daily,
Defeated by you.
Just when I thought
I'd reached the bottom...
I dive again...
I'm going under.
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Sunday, August 28, 2005

   Last day of freedom! *cries*
La li ho! Last night I decided that some things just aren't going as well as I want them to, and that it's time to get serious about them. Piano, being one. I need to practice what my mom tells me or I'll never get as good as I want to be. I can play just about anything...slowly. I still have a lot to learn, and the more I work on it, the quicker I'll be able to read notes. Singing, another. I need to do more than just sing my favorite songs whenever I feel like it. I could really use a teacher, but we don't have the money for that. So, I'll just have to teach myself. The more I work the vocal cords and the more things I try, the better I'll become. Drawing anime is another one. I draw faces, not bodies and I'm horrible at making up my own stuff(cause I never really try) so I'm going to work on that now, too. Of course, school puts a dent in that, as per usual. I haven't looked at the paper much. I know I have physics and PE and some kind of history class, Algebra 2, Advanced Vocal Ensemble...and uh...I forget the rest. lol I mean, you're talking to the person who doesn't give a shit about school, yet is graduating a year early. How does THAT add up? *shrugs* So, if I get more serious about developing my talents, I think maybe I can go somewhere with them. Cause right now...I get this feeling like I can't do anything. That's what I'm trying to change. Talent...reasonable effort...it's not good enough. Well, I don't have much else to say yet. *yawn* so I'll post again later in like...less than 11 hours lol. Ja ne!
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*Shuichi is all chibi like with sparkles around him and Hiro stops dead in his tracks when he sees it* "Sorry i'm late, Shuichi-"
"Na, Hiro, ask me if something good happened to me."
*Hiro blinks, then smirks* "Did something good happen to you?"
"Hi. Mi. Chu." (which is like saying S.E.C.R.E.T. but they don't have letters, so they can't spell it out. It sounds cute like that anyway)"Now say 'Don't be like that; tell me what happened.'"
*Hiro smiles* "Don't be like that; tell me what happened."
*Shuichi does a little dance* "I won't tell you!"
*Hiro keeps the smile, but sweatdrops, as if getting frustrated, then he laughs and pokes Shuichi's nose* "Silly you. Something good happened with Yuki Eiri?"
*Shuichi twitches* "How did you guess?"
"WASN'T HARD TO FIGURE OUT!!!"
Sorry to those who don't know Gravitation-I just love that part. And no pics for this post cause yeah. I'll put pics later!
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Saturday, August 27, 2005

   YESH!!!!
Well, today was interesting. I did dishes and other work all day. Picked tomatoes and cleaned...then I made dinner and even cleaned up all my mess cause I wanted the house to be nice. I wrote my mom a little poem, and when she got home, after she ate, I told her I'm taking her to Renaissance Faire. I'm taking her for labor day weekend. Jeremy pitched in, too. *huggles him*(ha, like he'd ever let me do that in real life. XD)Anyways, she was relaly surprised-it was funny. She was so curious about how I'm funding it-but i'm not telling her until after she spends it so she has no choice. lol She hates driving expressway, so she wants to find a better way there. And ya know, we have a whole week to figure out better directions...but she was already looking them up tonight until 2 AM. I can tell she's excited. I hope so much that it will go well.

Moving right along, or should I say, backing up, I had another nightmare last night. There were these apartments attached to a school. And I was walking Lyss's dogs. Then I go into this classroom...and everyone's giving me evil looks...like I did something wrong. Then this one girl who was apparently named Kristin said "I bet you failed the test, Elena." and she laughed at me. I told her I didn't, and I started looking for my paper. It was hard to find because i had to quint to see the names(I do have glasses, but I don't need them much). Then I find mine and I tell her "I got a B! A 15% B!"(I believe I meant that it was -15% which means I got an 85% B) and then I just started yelling at the top of my lungs all these things...kind of like how I was as good as anybody and stuff. i don't know. It was weird.

I was talking with a friend about old times again. Believe it or not, guys, I was a rotten kid. But we'll save story time for another day. ^^ I should probably get to bed soon. I added a new FMA wallpaper. So, you wanna see it, you know where to go. As for me, I think some-hopefully peaceful-sleep awaits. Ja ne!
P.S. LIGHT YAOI WARNING!
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I wanted you to know
That I love the way you laugh...
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I'd look something like that if I was asian....but with longer hair.


I can just hear it now:
"Nii-san get up!"
"Five more minutes, Al..."
"We're going to be late!"
"I know..."
"You KNOW?! Don't make me mad, nii-san!" Hell yeah...Al can be scary when he's pissed.


Awww....so cute!


Heehee...Roy's irritated. So cute!!!!


Now ed's the irritated one. Heehee.... took Winry and Riza out of this pic...cause yeah. Ja!



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Thursday, August 25, 2005

   OMG GUESS WHAT?!!?!?!
Another uneventful day with absolutely NOTHING to talk about. Um...I...did nothing all day. I'm such a sad case, right? ha ha...I watched Constantine um...again. Though I haven't watched the full movie since he bought it so technically I've seen the movie twice now. Lyss doesn't like it cause Neo's in there. XD I still think it's a good movie. That main character woman "Angela" is the one I don't like. Well, tiem for a new topic, since I'm boring you to tears if you ahven't seen the movie.

I know what's gonna happen in the FMA movie. >_> I feel like a cheater for knowing. So many deaths and stuff...but at least Ed and Al do NOT end up with Winry. That keeps me at peace until I get to actually see the movie. I have a pic of Ed and Al hugging when they finally meet again, too. YAY!

I did have a nasty nightmare. I was in some kind of class room and Ed was there. Suddenly, he jumps out the window and runs toward train tracks. the armor Al's in is in pieces. Even though the blood seal is broken, I keep picking Al's pieces up and telling Ed "Don't worry, I'll fix him...I'll fix him...". Then I hear a train coming, but too late. Ed stands there on purpose and gets hit. And his head is pretty much cut off his shoulders and there was a lot of blood...and then another train was coming and I stood there purposely and got hit, too. I woke up when I died.

Um...I can't think of anything else, so drool over this yaoi-aka YAOI WARNING!!!
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What does it mean to give up believing in something?
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Wednesday, August 24, 2005

   grr...
I just typed up a WHOLE post and everything and my browser was dumb and had an error and closed so SCREW IT. Just stare at this yaoi and be happy. Some of it is from TwistedNightmare...which I kinda "stole" GOMEN!! I love you for it! lol Where you find the really beautifully done pictures is beyond me...but they're great!
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When life gives you lemons...
Use it for yaoi!
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Tuesday, August 23, 2005

   Naaaa....so I have to post something, right?
I'm posting this a second time because I posted it like...15 minutes before everything starts over again, so yeah. lol Well, the past two days my head has been feeling really warm on and off. I was coughing today, too. I hope i'm not catching anything. Jeremy bought Constantine. That's a good movie. Erik's been an asswipe like usual, so I don't even need to go into that. I think I'm too witty for him. I always ahve combacks for what he says. And then he always runs out and just gives me the finger. ha ha...my mom yells at him for it, too. Of course, she yells at me for my mean combacks. Like, Gina calls here, let's it ring twice and then hangs up, and that's the asshole's signal to call her. He says it's because I'd be mean to her if I answered. Yeah, I told him, I'd hang up on her. Or tell her to go to hell and then hang up. He said something and I said "Screw that. Screw Gina, for that matter. Oh, wait, you already have that covered." so he gave me the finger and left ha ha.

Oh well. Take the bad with the good. Where ever there's happiness, depression is soon to follow. Behind every pain, there is reason or good...we just have to see it. Of course, there's another side to that, too. It's hard to explain, so I'll give an example. From my dad being gone, I have been very hurt, but learned many things. However, the other side is that I believe I could have learned all these things in a different way, without something so disgustingly painful like this. Ah, well. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst. Funny thing is, whenever the worst happens, we're never quite prepared.

Ugh...I just ate, but my stomach isn't too happy that I did. ick...oh well. ROLL WITH IT I TELL YOU! Just do your best and that's all you can do. But if you're not doing your best, then that shows you have no determination to be happy. You can still find happiness in any situation...isn't that called looking on the bright side?
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I walk a lonely road-
The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes-
But it's home to me
And I walk alone...

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one
And I walk alone...

I walk alone
I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me...
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating...
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me...
'Til then I walk alone...

I'm walking down the line
That divides me somewhere in my mind
On the border line
Of the edge
And where I walk alone

Read between the lines
What's fucked up and everything's alright
Check my vital signs
To know I'm still alive and I walk alone...

I walk alone
I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me...
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating...
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me...
'Til then I walk alone...

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one
And I walk alone...
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