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Monday, July 4, 2005


HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!!!
Not that I'm doing anything worth mentioning today. I mean...my mom and second oldest brother or working. My oldest brother left to go with his friend to The Taste of Chicago and then see the fireworks. I was going to go there...with a friend...last year. But shit happens and then we weren't friends. And it's weird...I tried to go back to being friends with her several times. And it's like...she gives me the chance, talks to me, but she won't LET me get too close. dammit. *sigh* anyways, so I gave up on that. It just comes to mind now and then. I first got up at freakin' 3 PM. so I'm gonna be alone with my little brother till whenever everyone gets home...*sigh*

Someone else's post reminded me of a time on the bus a while back. Whenever I come home from school on the bus, there's ALWAYS a shitload of kids from school. So a lot of people end up standing. So I was standing, and at one point, some people got off, and I was about to take the empty seat when I saw a man with a cane getting on. So I just stood there. He looked at me and I motioned that he could sit. I even held his cane for him while he sat himself down. He told me "God will bless you." Even though I don't really believe in god, it made my day. Even though, when I think about it, I haven't been blessed with what I need most. Life is fairly tolerable...but I can't...I can't get back...what I need-what my family needs.

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