myOtaku.com: shiroikarasu

myO Still <3's You

Vitals

Birthday
• 1990-06-13
Gender
• Female
Location
• MD, USA
Member Since
• 2003-08-03
Occupation
• DES's hikari
Real Name
• Tory (Dori, Tostito)

Personal

Achievements
• A lot, not that they matter. Anime Club President/Fuhrer till the end of this year.
Anime Fan Since
• (age 4) Tonari No Totoro
Favorite Anime
• Gravitation, Weiss Kreuz, Hagaren (FMA), Kino No Tabi, .hack, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann
Goals
• To go on an insane shopping spree in Tokyo sometime soon. Gosurori...
Hobbies
• Drooling. Over many things.
Talents
• I make a mean ramen, mm!

myOtaku.com: shiroikarasu

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

I don't know how I can go on like this. One little mistake can mess it all up. My whole life is in a fragile balance every moment of every day. A single misstep and it's all over.
Stopping my insanity is driving me insane itself. I was so scared today, because I forgot to take my pill last night and I was on the brink of self-destruction. Now I'm just angry, horribly, overwhelmingly angry. I feel really helpless, because I know that no one can stop it if I can't, and I don't know how to. See how just one little thing, forgetting to take one 20mg pill, can start destroying what little will-to-live I had built up? I just feel so lost. Unimportant things drive me crazy. Small problems seem like gigantic obstacles to overcome, huge and looming and invincible. I hate living like this, but I don't know what to do about it. I'm too afraid to leave behind what I know, even if I hate it.
I'm sorry to anyone I snapped at today. Blame whatever the hell made me like this. I've got enough of my own problems to deal with.
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